Announcing Your Wedding Plans: A Guide To Non-Invite Announcements

Wedding announcements are a great way to spread the news of your marriage to those who weren't invited or unable to attend. It's a chance to include distant relatives, friends, and colleagues in your celebration, even if they couldn't be there in person. While some may worry that sending announcements may come across as gift-grabby, it is considered polite to inform those in your circle about your nuptials, especially those you couldn't invite due to budget or venue capacity constraints. Wedding announcements can be sent through various means, such as local newspapers, mailed announcements, or even social media platforms like Facebook.

Send wedding announcements via local newspapers

Newspapers have long been a traditional way to announce a wedding. While it is no longer obligatory, as it once was, to announce a wedding in the local paper, it is still a great way to share your news with your community.

What to Include

The information you include in your newspaper wedding announcement will depend on the word count allowed by the publication, as well as your personal preference. Some couples prefer to stick to the basic facts, while others like to get creative and include more personal details. Here is a list of information that you may want to include:

• Both partners' full names, ages, occupations, and hometowns
• Both partners' parents' names, towns of residence, and occupations
• Both partners' maternal and paternal grandparents' names
• Both partners' schools, colleges, and degrees
• Location, date, and time of the ceremony and reception
• Officiant's name
• Attendants' names (bridesmaids and groomsmen) and relationship to the couple
• A description of the wedding dress and bouquet, if desired
• Where the couple plans to honeymoon
• Where the couple will live post-nuptials

Which Newspaper to Choose

Most couples opt to announce their wedding in local newspapers—those in each of their families' hometowns, as well as the town where the couple resides. If you are trying to keep costs down, you may want to choose just one newspaper to run the announcement. Note that some newspapers may charge a fee to publish your announcement.

How to Submit

Contact the newspaper(s) directly to find out their submission requirements. Ask about word count, format, and image specifications. You will also need to find out whether the announcement must be submitted by mail, email, or online form.

When to Submit

Most newspapers require wedding announcement submissions three to six weeks before the wedding date. They will then run the announcement during the first printing after the wedding. For example, if the local paper publishes wedding announcements on Sundays, it should appear the day after a Saturday wedding. If your wedding takes place mid-week, the announcement may be printed a few days after the event.

Spread the word through social media

Before the Wedding

If you're planning to announce your wedding on social media, it's important to first inform your loved ones, especially those closest to you, about your engagement. This can be done in person, over a video call, or through a phone call. Sharing the news directly with your VIPs will make them feel valued and ensure they don't find out through a social media post.

After the Wedding

Once you've tied the knot, it's time to spread the word on social media! Here are some tips to tastefully announce your wedding:

• Create a custom wedding hashtag: Come up with a fun and unique hashtag that reflects your special day. This will not only add a personal touch to your online announcement but also encourage guests to share their photos and memories using the hashtag.
• Share your happiness: Craft a heartfelt post or update your relationship status to let your online community know that you're married. You can include a brief message expressing your joy and gratitude, along with a few carefully selected photos from the wedding.
• Tag your partner: Make sure to tag your partner in your posts to ensure that your announcement reaches both of your networks. This will also allow your partner's friends and family to celebrate with you virtually.
• Consider a social media break: Planning a wedding can be stressful, and constantly comparing your special day to others on social media can add unnecessary pressure. Take a break from social media if needed and focus on enjoying your wedding journey.
• Respect your guests' wishes: If you had an unplugged wedding or requested guests to refrain from posting photos, respect their wishes and refrain from sharing any photos they may have taken.
• Privacy settings: Adjust your privacy settings to control who can see and share your wedding photos. This will help you manage the online presence of your special day.
• Share sneak peeks: If you want to maintain privacy, consider sharing a few carefully selected "sneak peek" photos from your wedding. This will give your online community a glimpse into your special day without flooding them with too many details.
• Announce on multiple platforms: Depending on your preference, you can share your wedding announcement on various social media platforms, such as Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter. This will ensure that your news reaches a wider audience.
• Avoid gift-grabbing: While it's acceptable to announce your wedding on social media, refrain from making it seem like a gift grab. Avoid mentioning gifts or including registry information in your online announcement.

Send a formal letter or email

Sending a formal letter or email is a great way to announce your wedding plans to those who won't be invited. Here are some tips and guidelines to help you craft these announcements:

Timing:

Ideally, wedding announcements should be sent as soon as possible after the wedding. They can be prepared in advance and mailed the day after the event to ensure prompt delivery. However, it is acceptable to send them up to several months after the wedding if needed.

Format and Content:

The format can vary depending on your relationship with the recipient and the overall tone you wish to convey. Here are some suggestions for content and formatting:

Letter Format: If handwriting or emailing your announcement, consider a letter format. This can be more personal and informal, allowing you to share your excitement directly. Here is an example:

> "Derek and I are so thrilled to announce that we are married! Our wedding was on September 26th at a small restaurant in Petaluma. We celebrated with just a few family and friends (toasting with California wines, of course!) and are heading on a honeymoon to Hawaii in a few weeks. We can’t wait to celebrate with you over the holidays!

> Love, Ashley and Derek"

Formal Announcement: For a more formal approach, especially if mailing printed announcements, consider a format similar to a wedding invitation. This example can be a good starting point:

> "Mr. and Mrs. James Welch are honored to announce the marriage of their daughter Ashley Michelle to Mr. Derek Scott Jamison, Saturday, the twenty-sixth of September two thousand and twenty, Petaluma, California."

• Newspaper Announcement: You may also consider submitting your wedding announcement to local newspapers or publications like the Vows section of The New York Times. Contact the publication directly to determine their submission requirements, including deadlines, word count, format, and any fees involved.
• Include Basic Information: Regardless of the format, be sure to include essential information such as the names of both partners, the date and location of the wedding, and a brief message expressing your joy and gratitude.

Recipient Considerations:

When deciding whom to send announcements to, consider the following:

• Guest List Limitations: If you're having a small, intimate wedding with a limited guest list, announcements are a great way to include those who couldn't be invited. This could be distant relatives, friends, or business associates.
• No Obligation to Send Gifts: Make it clear that recipients are not obligated to send gifts. Announcements are simply a way to share your news and joy with others.
• Avoid Gift Grabbing: While it's acceptable to mention your honeymoon plans, avoid including any gift registry details or giving the impression that you're seeking gifts.
• Consider Personal Connections: If you have a large extended family or a close-knit group of friends, they may appreciate receiving an announcement even if they already know about the wedding through word of mouth.
• Be Mindful of Explanations: If you choose to explain why someone isn't invited, focus on venue capacity, budget constraints, or the desire for an intimate celebration. Be gentle and gracious in your wording.

Remember, the key is to share your happiness while being mindful of your guests' feelings. Announcements are a lovely way to include others in your celebration, even if they can't be physically present.

Address it in person or via video call

If you're planning to address the fact that certain people aren't invited to your wedding in person or via video call, here are some ways to do so politely:

• Be honest and direct: Explain that you're happy they reached out and excited to reconnect. Fill them in on your life and ask about theirs. If they ask about the wedding, be transparent about your budget and space constraints. Suggest catching up over coffee or dinner after the wedding.
• Emphasize the intimate nature of the wedding: Express that you've chosen to have a small, intimate celebration with just close family and friends. Share that it was a difficult decision and that you would have loved to invite more people.
• Blame the venue or family: Explain that the venue has strict limitations on guest numbers, and the process of creating the guest list has been challenging. Share your disappointment about not being able to include everyone and suggest making plans to meet up after the wedding.
• Be firm but kind: Let them know that you're limiting the guest list to immediate family and close friends. Express your well-wishes and hope that they understand your decision.
• Offer alternative ways to celebrate: If appropriate, invite them to join a livestream of the ceremony or host a post-wedding celebration to include a broader group of friends and family.

Remember, it's your special day, and you're allowed to celebrate it with the people you choose. Be empathetic, but don't feel obligated to invite anyone out of guilt or pressure.

Send a postcard or a card in an envelope

If you're planning a small wedding and want to announce your nuptials to those who aren't invited, sending a postcard or a card in an envelope is a great option. This approach allows you to share your joy with loved ones who couldn't be part of your special day. Here are some guidelines and tips to help you craft the perfect wedding announcement:

When to Send

Ideally, prepare your announcements before the wedding so that you can mail them the day after your nuptials. This ensures that your loved ones find out about your marriage promptly. However, it's also acceptable to send them within a few days or even a few months after your wedding, especially if you want to include a wedding photo.

Who to Send

Wedding announcements are typically sent to distant relatives, business associates, or friends who couldn't be invited due to the small scale of the wedding. If you had a larger guest list and simply didn't invite everyone, it's best to avoid sending announcements to those friends as it may be perceived as a reminder that they weren't included.

What to Include

When it comes to the content of your announcement, there are a few key elements to include:

• The names of the hosts (usually the parents of the couple)
• The names of the couple
• The city where the wedding took place
• Optional: Reception information (location and time) and/or a wedding website link

"Mr. and Mrs. David Smith are delighted to announce the marriage of their daughter, Sarah Smith, to Mr. Michael Johnson, on the tenth of July 2023, in New York City."

"We are thrilled to share that we exchanged vows on May 25th in the enchanting city of Florence, Italy. We are grateful beyond words for the love and support of our family and friends."

"Together with their families, Ms. Jane Brigante and Mr. Robert White are delighted to announce their wedding, which took place on Saturday, the 10th of July, in Richmond, Virginia."

"Mr. and Mrs. Thompson take great joy in sharing the news of the union of their daughter, Emily, and Alex, on the 12th of September 2022, in New York City."

Remember, the wording can be as formal or informal as you wish. You can also include a personal note expressing your excitement and gratitude, such as "We deeply missed having you there, but you were in our hearts. We hope to see you soon!"

Frequently asked questions