Addressing Wedding Invites: Married Couple Edition

Addressing wedding invitations to married couples can be a tricky business. The traditional approach is to use Mr. and Mrs. followed by the husband's full name. However, this can be seen as old-fashioned and may offend some women who prefer to have their names included. A more modern approach is to list each partner separately, using their full names and titles. If the couple has the same last name, you can use Mr. and Mrs. followed by the husband's first and last name. For same-sex couples, use the appropriate titles (Mr. or Mrs.) followed by their full names. When addressing envelopes, always use full names and avoid abbreviations.

Married couple, different sex, same last name

When addressing wedding invitations to a married couple with the same last name, there are a few options to consider. The most traditional approach is to use "Mr. and Mrs." followed by the husband's full name. For example, "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Warren". However, this approach may be considered old-fashioned and may not sit well with modern women who prefer to keep their names separate.

A more modern and gender-neutral approach is to list each partner separately, using their respective titles and full names. For instance, "Mr. Thomas Warren and Mrs. Michelle Warren". This format also allows for flexibility if the couple has different last names or if one partner has a hyphenated last name.

If you prefer a more casual tone, you can use a combination of titles and first names, such as "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas and Michelle". Alternatively, you can drop the titles altogether and simply use the couple's first names, especially if you are close to them.

When addressing the outer envelope, it is important to use full names and avoid abbreviations. For the inner envelope, you have more flexibility and can use first names only if desired.

Additionally, if the couple has children under the age of 18, you can include their names on the second line of the inner envelope, after the parents' names. For girls under 18, you may use "Miss" as an optional title.

Married couple, same sex, same last name

When addressing wedding invitations to a married same-sex couple with the same last name, there are a few options to consider. The format you choose may depend on how traditional or modern you want to be, and how formal your wedding will be. Here are some suggestions:

Traditional Approach

Use "The Mesdames" for two women or "The Mssrs." for two men, followed by both their first names and last name. For example:

> The Mesdames Suzanne and Deborah Jones

> The Mssrs. Robert and Peter Smith

Modern Approach

Use "Mrs. and Mrs." or "Mr. and Mr." followed by their first names and last name. For example:

> Mrs. Suzanne and Mrs. Deborah Jones

> Mr. Robert and Mr. Peter Smith

Alphabetical Order

If you are inviting a same-sex couple who are not married, it is customary to list their names alphabetically. However, this can also be applied to married couples. Simply use their titles and full names, separated by "and". For example:

> Mrs. Deborah Jones and Mrs. Suzanne Smith

> Mr. Peter Smith and Mr. Robert Jones

Plural Form

Another option is to use the plural form of the title. This works especially well when the married same-sex couple has the same last name. For men, use "The Messrs." followed by their first names and last name. For women, use "The Mesdames". For example:

> The Messrs. Robert and Peter Smith

> The Mesdames Suzanne and Deborah Jones

Remember, the most important thing is to make your guests feel respected. If you think a particular form of address will offend someone, don't be afraid to change it! You can also ask the couple for their preferred greeting if you are unsure.

Married couple, different sex, different last names

When addressing wedding invitations to married couples with different last names, it is important to consider the couple's preferences and what tone you want to set for your wedding. Here are some options for addressing a married couple with different last names:

Traditional and Formal Approach:

Although it might be considered old-fashioned and might not sit well with modern women, the traditional way of addressing a married couple is to use "Mr. and Mrs." followed by the husband's full name. For example, "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Joseph Smith".

Modern and Formal Approach:

A more modern and gender-neutral approach is to list each partner separately, using their full names and titles. For example, "Mr. Frank Smith and Mrs. Grace Apple". This format also works if the couple has hyphenated last names.

Casual Approach:

If your wedding has a casual tone, you have more flexibility in how you address your invitations. You can use first names only or combine first and last names without titles. For example, "Frank Smith and Grace Apple" or "Frank and Grace".

Alphabetical Order:

Another option is to list the names of the couple alphabetically, regardless of gender. For example, "Mrs. Sarah Rossi and Mr. Chris Rossi".

Inner Envelope:

The inner envelope is less formal, and you can use first names only. For example, "Michael and Kim". If you are close to the couple, you can also use family relationship terms like "Aunt Rosa and Uncle Pat".

Married couple, same sex, different last names

When addressing wedding invitations to a married couple of the same sex with different last names, there are a few options to consider. The format will depend on whether you want to go for a traditional or modern style, and whether you want to include titles. Here are some examples:

Including Titles

If you wish to include titles such as "Mr.", "Mrs.", or "Ms.", you can write both names on the same line, separated by "and". For instance:

• Mr. Charles Adams and Mr. John Green
• Ms. Lisa Chan and Ms. Angelica Green

Using Titles and Full Names

Another option is to include the titles and full names of both individuals. In this case, you would write their names on separate lines:

• Mr. Charles Adams
• Mr. John Green

Using Plural Titles

If the couple has the same last name, you can use the plural form of the title. For men, you can use "The Messrs." followed by their first and last names. For women, you can use "The Mesdames" followed by their names. Here's how it would look:

• The Messrs. Dan and John Smith
• The Mesdames Anna and Emily Andrews

Alphabetical Order

When addressing a same-sex married couple, it is common to list the names alphabetically if you are equally close to both individuals. This can be especially helpful if you are unsure of the order in which to write their names.

Remember, the most important thing is to make your guests feel respected. If you think a particular form of address might offend someone, don't be afraid to choose a different option. You can also consider asking the couple for their preferred greeting to ensure you address them correctly.

Married couple, one person is a doctor

When addressing wedding invitations to a married couple where one person is a doctor, the general rules of etiquette apply. The specific way you write their names, however, depends on whether the couple shares the same last name, and whether it is the husband or the wife who is the doctor.

If the couple shares the same last name and the husband is a doctor, the traditional format is:

> Dr. and Mrs. [Husband's first name] [Shared last name]

If the couple has the same last name and the wife is the doctor, the format is:

> Dr. [Wife's first name] and Mr. [Husband's first name] [Shared last name]

If the couple has different last names and one person is a doctor, the format is:

> [Name of person with the title] [Name of person without the title]

For example, if the wife is a doctor and has a different last name, the format would be:

> Dr. [Wife's first name] [Wife's last name] and Mr. [Husband's first name] [Husband's last name]

If the couple has different last names and the husband is a doctor, the format would be:

> Dr. [Husband's first name] [Husband's last name] and Mrs./Ms. [Wife's first name] [Wife's last name]

In all cases, it is important to spell out the full names and titles without using abbreviations. Additionally, if the doctor in question has a PhD rather than an MD, it may be worth checking with the couple to see if they would prefer to be addressed as "Mr." and "Mrs." instead.

Frequently asked questions