Addressing Wedding Invites To Unmarried Couples: Etiquette Guide

When addressing wedding invitations to unmarried couples, it's important to consider both modern and traditional etiquette. While traditional wedding invitations include an outer mailing envelope and an inner envelope, it's now more common to send invitations without an inner envelope, focusing solely on the outer envelope. Here are some guidelines for addressing unmarried couples:

- List the names alphabetically by last name on separate lines, e.g., Mr. Ross Geller and Ms. Rachel Green.

- List both names on the same line, starting with the person you're closest to or alphabetically if you're equally close. For example, Ms. Rachel Green and Mr. Ross Geller.

- If the couple doesn't live together, send separate invitations to each guest.

- For same-sex unmarried couples, follow the same etiquette as for opposite-sex couples. List both names on the same line if they live together.

- When addressing individuals within a couple, use Ms. for unmarried women and Mr. for unmarried men. For non-binary individuals, the honorific Mx. is often preferred.

Outer envelope: Mr. Stanley Kim and Ms. Amanda Rhee

When addressing wedding invitations, it's important to follow certain guidelines to ensure your guests feel welcome and respected. Here are some tips for addressing the outer envelope to "Mr. Stanley Kim and Ms. Amanda Rhee":

• Use full names and titles: On the outer envelope, it is customary to use the guests' full names and titles. In this case, you would write "Mr. Stanley Kim and Ms. Amanda Rhee". Using titles such as "Mr." and "Ms." is more formal and traditional.
• Alphabetical or closeness order: If the couple has different last names, you can list their names alphabetically by last name. Alternatively, you can list the person you are closest to first. For example, if you are closer to Amanda, you could write "Ms. Amanda Rhee and Mr. Stanley Kim".
• Avoid abbreviations: When writing the address, avoid using abbreviations for street names, state names, or directional indicators (North, South, East, West). Write out the full address, such as "123 Main Street" instead of using numbers or abbreviations.
• Include serious partners: If you are aware that Stanley and Amanda are a serious couple, it is respectful to include both of their names on the outer envelope. This indicates that they are both invited and valued guests.
• Be mindful of gender preferences: Be mindful of the guests' gender preferences and identities. If one of the guests uses gender-neutral pronouns, you can use the honorific "Mx." instead of "Mr." or "Ms." It is always a good idea to double-check with the guests beforehand to ensure you are using their preferred titles and names.

Inner envelope: Mr. Kim and Ms. Rhee

When addressing wedding invitations, it's important to follow certain guidelines to ensure your guests feel welcome and respected. Here are some tips for addressing inner envelopes to unmarried couples, specifically "Inner envelope: Mr. Kim and Ms. Rhee":

• Use Full Names: It is generally considered more formal and respectful to use the full names of your guests rather than nicknames. In this case, you would use "Mr. Kim" and "Ms. Rhee" instead of their first names.
• Consider Relationship Status: Since Mr. Kim and Ms. Rhee are an unmarried couple, you would list their names separately on different lines. This is the traditional way to address an unmarried couple.
• Order of Names: When addressing an unmarried couple, you have a few options for the order of names. You can list the person you are closest with first, or you can go in alphabetical order by last name. For example, if Mr. Kim's last name is "Kim" and Ms. Rhee's last name is "Rhee," you would list "Mr. Kim" followed by "Ms. Rhee."
• Include Titles: It is customary to include appropriate titles when addressing wedding invitations. For an unmarried couple, you would use "Mr." for Mr. Kim and "Ms." for Ms. Rhee.
• Informality of Inner Envelopes: Inner envelopes are typically less formal than outer envelopes. While outer envelopes include the mailing address, postage, and return address, inner envelopes only contain the recipients' names. You have more flexibility with inner envelopes and can choose to use only first names if you are very close with the couple. In this case, you could write "Stanley and Amanda" instead of "Mr. Kim and Ms. Rhee."
• Consistency: Ensure that you maintain consistency in the format you choose across all your wedding invitations. This creates a unified look and feel for your invitations.

Remember, these are general guidelines, and you can adjust them based on your personal preferences and the level of formality you desire for your wedding invitations.

Alphabetical order if equally close

When addressing wedding invitations to unmarried couples, it is customary to include both names on one line, with the person you are closest to listed first. However, if you are equally close to both guests, it is appropriate to go in alphabetical order.

Outer envelope:

Mr. Gabriel Reyes

Mr. Aaron Triguiero

Inner envelope:

Mr. Reyes

Mr. Triguiero

This format is also applicable when addressing wedding invitations to couples with distinguished titles, such as doctors, lawyers, judges, or military personnel. In such cases, the person with the higher-ranking title should be named first, regardless of gender.

For instance, if you are inviting a couple who are both doctors, the outer envelope could be addressed as follows:

Outer envelope:

Doctors Anne and Peter Underwood

Inner envelope:

The Doctors Underwood

Alternatively, if one person has a higher rank, such as a doctor and their partner does not, the outer envelope could be addressed as:

Dr. Anne Barker and Mr. Peter Underwood

If you are unsure about the preference or distinction of your guests, it is always a good idea to ask them beforehand to ensure you are using their preferred titles and names.

Avoid '+ Guest' for plus ones

When it comes to wedding guest lists, the topic of plus-ones can be confusing. It's important to be clear about who is invited to avoid any potential awkwardness. Here are some tips to avoid using "+ Guest" for plus ones:

Be Clear About Who Is Invited

It is essential to address your wedding invitations correctly. When writing the names of your guests on the outer and inner envelopes, make it clear who is invited. If a guest is allowed to bring a plus-one, include "and Guest" after their name. For example, "Ms. Jessica Miller and Guest". If a guest does not have a plus-one, simply address the invitation to their name only, such as "Mr. John Smith".

Use RSVP Cards

Another way to communicate the plus-one rule is through RSVP cards. Write your guest(s) names on the reply card yourself, leaving no room for them to add additional names. You can also add a section stating, "We have reserved __ seat(s) in your honour" and fill in the number of people invited. For instance, if your cousin Mary is not allowed to bring a guest, write "1 seat".

Create a FAQ on Your Wedding Website

A wedding website is a great tool to share vital information that may not fit on the invitation, such as directions to the venue and your gift list. Include a Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) section to address common queries, such as whether guests can bring a plus-one. Here's an example FAQ:

Q: Can I bring a date (plus-one) to your wedding?

> A: Unfortunately, due to budget and space limitations, we cannot accommodate plus-ones unless they are specifically named on the invitation. Thank you for your understanding.

Inform Guests in Advance

Before sending out your wedding invitations, you can casually mention the "no plus-ones" rule in conversations with friends and family. Explain that your venue is small or that you are trying to stick to a budget, making it impossible to allow plus-ones.

Stick to Your Rule

If you've decided on a "no plus-ones" rule, be consistent and stick to it. Avoid making exceptions for certain guests to prevent any potential drama or hurt feelings between wedding guests.

Inner envelope: First names only

When addressing wedding invitations to unmarried couples, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, it is important to use the couple's first names on the inner envelope if you are close to them. This is more informal and will make the couple feel more comfortable. If you are not as close to the couple, you can simply use "Mr." and "Ms." without their first names.

Another thing to consider is the order in which you write the couple's names. Traditionally, the man's name is listed first. However, it is now more appropriate to list the person's name that you are closest to first, regardless of gender. For example, if you are inviting your friend Sarah and her partner Chris, the invitation can read, "Mrs. Sarah Rossi and Mr. Chris Rossi".

Additionally, if the couple has different last names, you can list the names alphabetically or based on who you are closest to. For instance, if the couple's names are Rachel Green and Ross Geller, you can write "Ms. Rachel Green and Mr. Ross Geller" or "Mr. Ross Geller and Ms. Rachel Green".

It is also important to use the correct pronouns for trans or non-binary people. Simply follow the same format as for other couples but use their preferred pronouns. For example, "Mx. Adam and Mx. Bruce Acheson".

Finally, remember to include the children's names on the inner envelope if they are invited and always use full names instead of nicknames.

Frequently asked questions