Guide To Graciously Addressing Sponsors In Wedding Invites

When it comes to addressing sponsors in your wedding invitations, there are a few things to consider. Firstly, it is common to include an entourage list in your invitation suite, which gives prominence and honour to the members of the wedding party. This list typically starts with the names of the principal sponsors or witnesses, followed by the secondary sponsors, the best man and maid of honour, groomsmen and bridesmaids, and other roles such as the ring bearer and flower girls.

When addressing the sponsors directly, it is respectful to use formal titles such as Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss, depending on their age and marital status. For example, you could write Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Warren on the outer envelope and Mr. and Mrs. Warren or Thomas and Michelle on the inner envelope. If one of your sponsors has a distinguished title, such as a doctor, lawyer, judge, or military personnel, it is proper to address them by that title. For instance, Doctor and Mrs. Smith or The Honourable Gina Rodriguez and Mr. Martin Rodriguez.

It is also worth noting that some couples choose to send a separate Will you be my principal sponsor? card along with the wedding invitation, especially if they are asking someone to be their sponsor for the first time. This card can include a personal message such as, Will you do us the honour of becoming our Principal Sponsor?

How to ask someone to be your principal sponsor

Asking someone to be your principal sponsor can be nerve-wracking, but it's important to remember that many people feel honoured to be chosen, especially if they are close to you. Here are some steps and tips to guide you on how to ask someone to be your principal sponsor:

Step 1: Create a List of Prospects

First, decide on a list of people you want to include as your principal sponsors. Usually, couples choose individuals they admire, look up to, and respect. Consider people who you can go to for advice, guidance, or any form of help regarding married life. Think about the different facets of marriage and select a variety of people who can support you in different ways. For example, you might choose someone for their business acumen or another person for their strong faith. It is also common to choose older, married couples whose marriage you aspire to emulate.

Step 2: Decide on an Approach

There are several ways to approach and ask someone to be your principal sponsor:

• Meet-up: While it may be tempting to just send a text or call, it is more formal and respectful to schedule an in-person meeting. You can also send an initial heads-up via text or messenger to set up this meeting. During the meet-up, you can have a nice chat and let them know why you chose them. You can even ask for their advice on topics like finances, marriage practices, and raising children.
• Send a "Will you be my principal sponsor?" card: A trendy option is to send a formal invitation card along with their actual wedding invites. This card can include a short explanatory message, such as:

> [Name of invitee]

> To stand as a witness of our love

> To guide us in our married life

> To give us wise counsel

> Will you do us the honour of becoming our Principal Sponsor?

Social Media Invite: This approach is less formal and should be reserved for individuals who are based overseas or live far away. You can use various platforms like Messenger, Facebook, Skype, or email to extend the invitation. Ensure that you remain formal, polite, and sincere in your communication.

Step 3: Brief Them Before the Wedding

Once your chosen principal sponsors have accepted your invitation, stay in touch and provide them with necessary updates. Send them a text message or email a few days or weeks before the wedding, including a short summary of the date, venue, and call time. You can also provide them with the contact information of your coordination team, if applicable. A week before the wedding, consider sending a personal message expressing your excitement to see them at the event.

Remember, it is essential to choose your principal sponsors judiciously, as they play a crucial role in your wedding ceremony and can offer valuable advice and support throughout your married life.

Addressing wedding invitations to a married couple

When addressing wedding invitations to a married couple, there are a few different approaches you can take depending on your preferred level of formality and the couple's last name situation. Here are some examples to illustrate the various options:

Married Couple With the Same Last Name

For a heterosexual couple, the traditional approach is to use "Mr." and "Mrs." followed by the husband's full name. For example:

• Outer envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Warren"
• Inner envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. Warren" or "Thomas and Michelle"

However, this format may be seen as outdated and may offend some women who prefer to keep their names separate from their husband's. A more modern approach would be to list each partner's full name and title separately, even if they share a last name:

• Outer envelope: "Mr. Thomas Warren and Mrs. Michelle Warren"
• Inner envelope: "Mr. Warren and Mrs. Warren" or "Thomas and Michelle"

Married Couple With Different Last Names

When addressing a married couple with different last names, write their names on the same line with the woman's name first. If their combined names are too long to fit on one line, list them separately:

• Outer envelope: "Ms. Maria Stevens and Mr. David Estevez"
• Inner envelope: "Ms. Stevens and Mr. Estevez" or "Maria and David"

Married Couple With One Hyphenated Last Name

In the case of a spouse who has chosen to hyphenate their last name, invitations can be addressed in the following way:

• Outer envelope: "Mr. Marcus Craft and Mr. Brian Crosby-Craft"
• Inner envelope: "Mr. Craft and Mr. Crosby-Craft" or "Marcus and Brian"

Same-Sex Married Couple

Same-sex couples can be addressed in the same way as opposite-sex couples. Simply use the appropriate titles ("Mr."/"Mrs."/"Mx.") and list the names in alphabetical order if they have different last names:

• Outer envelope: "Mr. Adam Acheson and Mr. Bruce Acheson" or "Mrs. Tatiana Brown and Mrs. Tiffany Jackson"
• Inner envelope: "Mr. Adam and Mr. Bruce" or "Mrs. Tatiana and Mrs. Tiffany"

Unmarried Couple Living Together

For unmarried couples living at the same address, include both names on separate lines. List the person you are closest to or alphabetically if you are equally close to both:

• Outer envelope: "Mr. Aaron Triguiero and Mr. Gabriel Reyes"
• Inner envelope: "Mr. Triguiero and Mr. Reyes" or "Aaron and Gabriel"

Remember, these are just guidelines, and you can adjust the format to match your preferred level of formality and the specific relationships you have with the invited couples.

Addressing wedding invitations to an unmarried couple

When addressing wedding invitations to an unmarried couple, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, it's important to use the correct titles or prefixes for each person. For an unmarried woman, use "Ms." unless she is under the age of 18, in which case "Miss" is more appropriate. For an unmarried man, use "Mr." unless he is under 18, then no title is necessary. If your guest identifies as non-binary, use the honorific "Mx."

If the unmarried couple lives together, you have two options for addressing the invitation. You can either list their names alphabetically by last name on separate lines or put both names on the same line, starting with the person you are closest to. If you are equally close to both, go in alphabetical order. Here is an example:

On the outer envelope:

Mr. Ross Geller

Ms. Rachel Green

Or:

Ms. Rachel Green and Mr. Ross Geller

On the inner envelope, you can use courtesy titles and last names or just first names if you are close to the couple:

Ms. Green and Mr. Geller or Rachel and Ross

If the unmarried couple does not live together, send a separate invitation to each guest.

Addressing wedding invitations to a single person

When addressing wedding invitations to a single person, it's important to use their preferred title. If you're unsure, it's best to leave out the title altogether. Here are some examples to help you:

Example 1: Without a Plus-One

On the outer envelope: Ms. Ali Johnson

On the inner envelope: Ms. Johnson

Example 2: With a Plus-One

On the outer envelope: Mx. Sam Li

On the inner envelope: Sam Li and Guest

Example 3: Single Female Under 18

On the outer envelope: Miss Donna-Jo Tanner

On the inner envelope: Miss Tanner

Example 4: Single Male Under 18

On the outer envelope: George Costanza

On the inner envelope: George

Example 5: Widow

On the outer envelope: Mrs. Blanche Devereaux

On the inner envelope: Mrs. Devereaux

Example 6: Divorced Female

On the outer envelope: Mrs./Ms. Cookie Holloway

On the inner envelope: Mrs./Ms. Holloway

Example 7: Judge

On the outer envelope: The Honorable Sonia Sotomayor

On the inner envelope: Judge Sotomayor

Example 8: Priest

On the outer envelope: Father Damien Karras

On the inner envelope: Father Karras

Addressing wedding invitations to those with distinguished titles

When addressing wedding invitations to guests with distinguished titles, it's important to follow the correct etiquette. Here are some guidelines to ensure your invitations are properly addressed:

Doctors

For a married couple where one partner is a doctor, list the doctor's name first, regardless of gender. You can choose to spell out "Doctor" on the outer envelope and abbreviate it as "Dr." on the inner envelope.

Example:

• Outer envelope: "Doctor Tami Takata and Mr. Peter Underwood"
• Inner envelope: "Dr. Takata and Mr. Underwood" or "Tami and Peter"

If both partners are doctors, you can address them as "The Doctors" on the outer envelope and use their names on the inner envelope.

Example:

• Outer envelope: "The Doctors Smith" or "Drs. Matthew and Angela Smith"
• Inner envelope: "The Doctors Smith" or "Matthew and Angela"

Military Personnel

For military couples, ensure you know the correct titles and understand the guests' military ranks and service. Address the guest with the higher rank first, regardless of gender.

Example:

• Outer envelope: "Lieutenant Jonathan Kelly, US Navy and Mrs. Jane Kelly"
• Inner envelope: "Lieutenant Kelly, US Navy and Mrs. Kelly"

Lawyers

When addressing a couple where one or both partners are lawyers, use "Esquire" or "Esq." after their names.

Example:

• Outer envelope: "Michelle Brown, Esq. and Mr. John Brown"
• Inner envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. Brown"

Judges

When addressing a judge, use the term "The Honorable" before their full name. If the judge is married, include their spouse's title as well. For inner envelopes, you can use "Judge" followed by their name.

Example:

• Outer envelope: "The Honorable Gina Rodriguez and Mx. Alice Rodriguez"
• Inner envelope: "Judge Rodriguez and Mx. Rodriguez"

Other Distinguished Titles

For other distinguished titles such as clergy or rabbis, follow similar guidelines as above. List the person with the distinguished title first, regardless of gender. For inner envelopes, you can use their title and last name or just their first name if you are very close.

Examples:

• Outer envelope: "Rabbi and Mrs. Richard Glass" or "The Reverend Richard Glass and Mrs. Rosina Glass"
• Inner envelope: "Rabbi Glass and Mrs. Glass" or "Richard and Rosina"

Frequently asked questions