Wedding Party Size: How Many Are Too Many?

Deciding on the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen to include in a wedding can be a challenging task. While there are no fixed rules, the number usually depends on the type of wedding, the size of the venue, the number of guests, and the couple's budget. In formal weddings with over 200 guests, it is common to have 6 to 10 bridesmaids and a similar number of groomsmen. Semi-formal weddings typically have between 1 and 6 attendants on each side, while casual weddings often have none or just a best man and maid of honour. Ultimately, the decision is a personal one, and there is flexibility in choosing the size of the wedding party.

Bridesmaids' duties

The number of bridesmaids and groomsmen at a wedding can vary, but it often depends on the couple's preferences, the size of the wedding, and the budget. While some couples choose to have an equal number of bridesmaids and groomsmen, it is not a requirement, especially in the UK, as ushers or groomsmen usually stand at the front with the groom and do not walk down the aisle with the bridesmaids.

Now, let's discuss the duties of a bridesmaid in more detail.

Before the Wedding:

Bridesmaids have a range of responsibilities leading up to the wedding day. Here are some typical duties:

• Financial Commitments: Bridesmaids are usually expected to pay for their attire, including the dress, shoes, jewellery, and accessories. They may also contribute to the cost of pre-wedding events like the bridal shower and bachelorette party.
• Planning and Attendance: Planning and attending pre-wedding events, such as the bridal shower and bachelorette party, are crucial duties. The maid of honour typically leads these efforts, but bridesmaids provide essential support.
• Emotional Support: Providing emotional support to the bride is central to a bridesmaid's role. This includes being available, present, and positive throughout the planning process and offering help whenever needed.
• Communication: Open and honest communication is key. Discuss expectations and be clear about any responsibilities that may be beyond your means.
• Venue and Travel Logistics: Bridesmaids should book their travel and accommodation for the wedding early on. They should also attend the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner to familiarise themselves with the ceremony flow and their roles.
• Wedding Planning Tasks: While not the primary planners, bridesmaids may assist with smaller tasks like stuffing envelopes, alphabetising escort cards, DIY projects, or accompanying the bride to appointments.
• Gifts: Bridesmaids, like other wedding guests, are expected to send a gift from the wedding registry to the couple before the wedding.

On the Wedding Day:

• Getting Ready: Bridesmaids should arrive on time at the designated location with all their gear. They assist the bride in getting ready, keeping her calm, and handling any last-minute tasks or issues.
• Ceremony Participation: Bridesmaids need to be in place at the ceremony venue, hidden from sight, and ready for their cues to walk down the aisle. They should follow the planner's instructions and maintain a respectful atmosphere during the ceremony.
• Guest Interaction: Bridesmaids may be tasked with greeting and guiding guests, directing them to parking areas, bathrooms, and other areas of the venue. They also facilitate guest participation by overseeing the guest book, wedding favours, or gift table.
• Photography: After the ceremony, bridesmaids should stay together for group photographs to ensure the couple can enjoy their cocktail hour without delays.
• Celebration and Enjoyment: During the reception, bridesmaids should mingle with guests, enjoy the food and drinks, participate in activities like signing the guest book, and dance.
• Send-off Support: Finally, bridesmaids help assemble any items that need to be transported out of the venue, including decorations, gifts, cards, and the couple's overnight bags. They also ensure guests depart safely and the couple's wedding attire arrives at their hotel room.

Remember, while these are typical duties, the bride may have different expectations, so clear communication is essential to ensure everyone is on the same page.

Budget

The number of bridesmaids and groomsmen you have in your wedding party will depend on your budget. Each additional person you include will bring extra costs, so it's important to consult your wedding budget before making any decisions.

For each bridesmaid, you may need to pay for their dress, shoes, jewellery, accessories (such as a clutch bag or hairpiece), flowers (bouquet and/or corsage), food throughout the day (including canapés, wedding breakfast and reception buffet), a bridesmaid gift (to say thank you), and transportation to the venue. Many brides also pay for their bridesmaids' hair and makeup to be styled on the morning of the wedding. If you want your bridesmaids to look a certain way, it's generally your responsibility to pay for it.

The same goes for groomsmen. You may need to pay for their suits, shoes, accessories, flowers, food, gifts, and transportation. If you're having a formal wedding, you may also want to include a ring bearer and a flower girl, which will add to your costs.

The number of attendants you have will also impact the cost of your wedding breakfast and reception buffet, as well as any pre-wedding events such as the engagement party, bridal shower, and bachelorette party.

If you're trying to stick to a tight budget, consider having a smaller wedding party. This could mean just having a best man and a maid of honour, or a couple of bridesmaids and groomsmen. You could also ask your attendants to cover some of their own costs, such as their outfits and hair and makeup.

On the other hand, if you have a larger budget, you may be able to afford a bigger wedding party. Just remember to factor in all the associated costs when making your decision.

Other Considerations

In addition to your budget, there are a few other factors you may want to consider when deciding on the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen:

• The size and layout of your venue: A large ballroom may look odd with only a couple of attendants, while a small registry office may not have a lot of space for a big wedding party.
• The formality of your wedding: Formal weddings typically have more attendants than semi-formal or casual weddings.
• Friendship dynamics: Think about who you want to include and whether leaving anyone out could hurt their feelings.
• Your partner's preferences: Discuss how many attendants they would like and try to come to a compromise if you have different ideas.
• Practical considerations: Consider the duties and responsibilities you'll want your wedding party to take on and choose people who are reliable and able to help with planning and organising.

Venue size

The number of bridesmaids and groomsmen you can have at your wedding is entirely up to you and your budget. However, there are a few things to consider when deciding on the number, such as the venue size, number of guests, and budget.

The size of your venue will play a crucial role in determining how many bridesmaids and groomsmen you can have. If you're getting married in a small venue such as a registry office or a country hotel, you may need to limit the number of attendants. On the other hand, if you're getting married in a large ballroom, having only a few attendants may look odd. It's important to consider the space available for your bridal party to stand or sit during the ceremony.

Additionally, consider the layout of the venue and how you want your wedding photos to look. For example, you may want to have an even number of bridesmaids so that the bride can stand in the middle for photos, creating a symmetrical look. Alternatively, you can get creative with poses and setups to make your photos look balanced, even with an odd number of attendants.

When deciding on the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen, it's essential to do a venue walk-through and visualize how everything will look on the day. Consider the space available for the ceremony, the wedding party entrance, and the photos. This will help you determine the ideal number of attendants for your venue size.

Formality

The number of bridesmaids and groomsmen at a wedding is largely dependent on the formality of the event.

Very formal weddings (black tie) typically have between 6 and 10 bridesmaids and a similar number of groomsmen. These weddings often include a flower girl and a ring bearer/page boy.

Semi-formal to formal weddings usually have somewhere between 2 and 6 bridesmaids and the same number of groomsmen. A ring bearer and flower girl are optional.

For more casual weddings, elopements, and registry office weddings, it is common to have just one or two bridesmaids and groomsmen, or none at all.

The size of the wedding party is also influenced by the number of guests, the size of the venue, and the couple's budget. A good rule of thumb is to have one usher for every 50 guests.

Ultimately, the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen is a personal choice and there are no fixed rules. Couples should feel free to adapt these guidelines to suit their preferences and the dynamics of their social group.

Friendship dynamics

When it comes to friendship dynamics, it's important to consider the feelings of your friends and how leaving someone out might affect your relationships. If you have a large friend group, you might want to narrow it down to your closest friends or only include siblings. On the other hand, if you have a small friend group, you might choose to have just one friend or sibling by your side. It's also worth noting that being a bridesmaid or groomsman can be expensive, so it's essential to be mindful of your friends' financial situations and not put pressure on them to accept.

Additionally, the dynamics within the group should be considered. If your friends have very different personalities, managing their expectations and opinions can be challenging. Social interactions outside of wedding planning, such as lunch dates, can help encourage harmony within the group.

The number of bridesmaids and groomsmen can also be influenced by the level of formality of the wedding. Formal weddings typically have more attendants, with six to ten on each side, while semi-formal or casual weddings usually have fewer. Ultimately, the decision should be based on personal preferences, the size of the wedding venue, and the couple's budget.

Frequently asked questions