Deborah Chan
Eastern Orthodox weddings are rich in symbolism and steeped in tradition. The ceremony is led by a priest and a koumbaros, who is a best man and remains an important figure in the couple's life. The weddings are longer than Catholic ceremonies, lasting around 45 minutes. The couple is adorned in royal garments, including embroidered capes. The ceremony includes the betrothal (engagement) and the crowning (marriage). The couple exchanges rings first, followed by the crowning, where the couple is crowned 'king' and 'queen' of their household. The couple also partakes in the common cup ritual, where they drink from a cup of blessed wine, symbolizing their mutual sharing of joy and sorrow.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Duration | 45 minutes |
| Ceremony led by | Priest and Koumbaros (best man) |
| Rings exchanged on | Right ring fingers |
| Crowns made of | Gold, wire, white satin, flowers, orange blossom, myrtle leaves, semiprecious stones and metals, or threads of gold and crimson |
| Couple walks around | Altar |
| Number of sips of wine from the Common Cup | Three |
| Hymns sung by the choir | Three |
| Number of blessings by the priest | Three |
| Number of times the couple exchanges crowns | Three |
| Number of times the priest presses the couple's forehead with the rings | Three |
| Number of times the priest mentions the Trinity | Three |
| Number of premarital counselling sessions | Minimum of four |
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What You'll Learn
The ceremony
The Betrothal
The Eastern Orthodox wedding ceremony begins with a betrothal ceremony, which in ancient times was a separate event from the wedding itself and was sometimes treated as a marriage. In this part of the ceremony, the rings are blessed by the priest, who makes the sign of the cross while holding the rings and declaring the betrothal. The priest may also press the couple's foreheads three times each while holding the rings in his hands. The rings are then exchanged between the couple's fingers three times, either by the priest or the koumbaros. The exchange of rings signifies that the weakness of one will be compensated by the other. The rings are placed on the third finger of the right hand, as the right hand is considered to have a rich and symbolic history in the church. The couple may also be given lit candles to hold in their left hands for the remainder of the service, symbolising their spiritual willingness to receive God's blessings.
The Crowning
The second half of the Eastern Orthodox wedding is the Crowning, which contains its most recognisable and visually compelling rituals. The priest holds a crown over the groom's head while reciting a blessing and then places the crown on the groom's head. The same process is then repeated for the bride. The crowns, often fashioned into ornate wreaths, symbolise glory and honour, as well as the crowns of martyrdom, representing the self-sacrifice inherent in marriage. The white ribbon joining the crowns indicates that God blesses the couple as a union. The couple is then crowned king and queen of their household.
The Dance of Isaiah
The final ritual of the Eastern Orthodox wedding is the Dance of Isaiah, also known as the Ceremonial Walk. The couple, with hands tied, follow the priest around a small table three times, symbolising eternity. The couple is then led in a joyful dance around the altar by the priest, who sings hymns, followed by their wedding sponsors. This dance symbolises the couple's first steps as a married couple.
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Betrothal and crowning
Eastern Orthodox weddings are steeped in rich symbolism and culture, with traditions that have remained unchanged for 2,000 years. The ceremonies are longer than a Catholic wedding, lasting around 45 minutes. The main two parts of the wedding are the betrothal and the crowning.
Betrothal
The betrothal ceremony begins with the "Waiting of the Bride", where the bride's father escorts her down the aisle to meet the groom in front of the altar. The priest then formally asks the couple if they wish to marry each other and if they have already committed themselves to anyone else. The couple will then exchange rings as a voluntary pledge to enter into marriage. The rings are placed on the ring finger of the right hand. The priest will bless the rings and may hold them to the couple's foreheads, exchanging them three times between the couple to signify their devotion and commitment.
Crowning
The crowning is the centerpiece of the Eastern Orthodox marriage ceremony and is considered the second half of the wedding. The couple is crowned 'king' and 'queen' of their new household. The crowns are a symbol of glory and honour and are often made of gold, flowers, or other ornate materials. The couple may exchange the crowns three times. The priest will then bless the couple and recite a prayer. The couple will then drink from the "Common Cup", representing the shared life they will lead.
The Eastern Orthodox faith varies slightly in different regions and is practised in Mediterranean, Middle Eastern, and Eastern European countries, including Greece, Lebanon, Egypt, Russia, and Ukraine. While the ceremony is steeped in tradition, the reception that follows is based on the preferences of the newly married couple and local customs.
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The reception
While the Eastern Orthodox wedding ceremony is steeped in ancient rites and symbolism, the reception that follows is largely dictated by the preferences of the newlyweds and local customs.
In a Macedonian wedding, for instance, the godparents are the guests of honour at the reception, seated at the head table. The main speeches are usually given by the couple's parents and godparents, with the maid of honour and best man speeches being secondary.
The Eastern Orthodox wedding ceremony, which precedes the reception, is replete with profound symbolism and rituals. The couple is led by their priest and the koumbaros, or best man, who remains a significant figure in their lives. Most rituals are performed three times to represent the Holy Trinity. The ceremony begins with a betrothal service, during which the priest blesses the wedding rings and places them on the couple's right ring fingers, symbolising their union. The couple then drinks from a cup of blessed wine, symbolising the Holy Trinity.
The crowning ceremony, which involves the couple being crowned king and queen of their household, is the focal point of the Eastern Orthodox wedding ceremony. The crowns, which are joined by a white ribbon, symbolise the couple's unity and are often made of garland wreaths, orange blossoms, myrtle leaves, semi-precious stones and metals, or gold and crimson threads.
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Pre-marital counselling
An Eastern Orthodox wedding ceremony is a profound and symbolic ancient rite, full of rich culture and lasting around 45 minutes. The couple is led through the ceremony by a priest and a koumbaros (best man/woman), who remains an important figure in the couple's life. The ceremony includes the betrothal (engagement) and the crowning (marriage).
The Greek Orthodox Archdiocese of America also emphasizes the importance of marriage preparation, stating that research shows couples who undergo some form of marriage preparation have a lower divorce rate. They offer a three-part program called "The Journey of Marriage in the Orthodox Church", which is designed to help couples learn how to make decisions together and work through challenges and disagreements.
The Malankara Orthodox Syrian Church offers a one-day counselling session that is split into seven sessions covering various aspects:
- Physiological
- Psychological
- Legal
- Theology and family
- Sacramental
- Communication in family life
- Sociological
Some of the questions that couples may want to consider before pre-marital counselling include:
- Do you consider marriage a lifelong commitment?
- Do you understand the Church's teachings on marriage?
- Are you aware of the guidelines on who can and cannot be married in the Church?
- Have you discussed whether you want children, and if so, how many and how you will care for them?
- Will the Church be part of your married life?
- How important is home life and spending time with your spouse and family?
- How will you care for your parents as they age?
- Do you want to own a home?
- How is your relationship with your in-laws, and how close would you like to live to them?
- Which language will be spoken at home and with your children?
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Traditions and symbolism
The Eastern Orthodox wedding ceremony is steeped in ancient tradition and symbolism. The ceremony is composed of two services: the Service of Betrothal, or Engagement ceremony, and the Service of Marriage or Crowning.
Betrothal
The Betrothal service begins with the priest formally asking the couple if they wish to marry each other and if they are free to do so. The priest blesses the couple and the rings, making the sign of the cross while holding the rings. The rings are then exchanged three times by the couple’s wedding sponsor, or koumbaros, to signify the Holy Trinity and the give and take of a happy marriage. The couple is given a candle to hold in their left hand, symbolising their belief in Jesus Christ as the Light of the World. The priest then joins the couple's right hands with a cloth, symbolising their unity.
Crowning
The Crowning is the second half of the Eastern Orthodox wedding and is considered the most visually compelling part of the ceremony. The couple are crowned king and queen of their household, symbolising the glory and honour bestowed on them by God. The crowns are joined by a white ribbon, symbolising the couple's unity and the presence of Christ, who establishes the couple as rulers of their home. The couple then drinks from a cup of blessed wine, symbolising the life they will share together.
Dance of Isaiah
The final ritual of the Eastern Orthodox wedding is the Dance of Isaiah, where the couple, with their hands still tied, follow the priest around a small table three times. This ceremonial procession symbolises the couple's first steps as husband and wife in the eyes of God, with the circular path representing eternity. The service ends with the priest removing the crowns and blessing the couple, before separating their hands with the Bible as a reminder that only God can separate their marriage.
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Frequently asked questions
Eastern Orthodox weddings can last around 45 minutes. This is because the tradition has not been changed for thousands of years and is full of symbolism and rituals.
The Koumbaros is the best man or maid of honour and remains an important figure in the couple's life. They are usually Orthodox and present during the wedding ceremony. They may also exchange the rings between the couple.
The priest leads the couple through the ceremony, offering blessings and prayers, and joining the couple's hands. The priest also crowns the couple and reads from scripture.
The couple drinks wine from a shared cup, also known as the Common Cup, to symbolise their mutual sharing of joy and sorrow. This is based on the wedding of Cana of Galilee, where Jesus turned water into wine.
