The Best Man's Guide To Complimenting Bridesmaids

The best man's speech is a highly anticipated part of the wedding, with the pressure on to be funny, sentimental, and engaging. While the best man is expected to be complimentary towards the bride and bridesmaids, the focus of the speech is the groom. The best man should share anecdotes and stories about the groom, and the couple's relationship, with a few self-deprecating jokes thrown in. While it's fine to be risqué, it's important not to objectify the bridesmaids or veer into lewd territory. The best man should also thank the groom for toasting the bridesmaids and comment on the couple, ending with a final toast to the happy couple.

How to open the best man's speech

Opening a best man's speech with a bang is important to grab the attention of the audience. Here are some ideas for how to do that:

• Jump right in: "So they've finally done it. [Bride] has agreed to put up with [Groom] for the rest of her life and he's got that in writing."
• Address your audience: "Hands up who's ever had to look after [Groom] when he's had a few beers?"
• Short and snappy: "Well, let's start with the elephant in the room. Why has the gorgeous, talented [Bride] married a bright orange lad from Croydon who still can't spell?"
• Start with a story: "Let me tell you a story... When I first saw [Groom], sitting in the bar, reading a book in the middle of Saturday night chaos, I knew I had to speak to him. Only he was too absorbed in his [book title] to notice me."
• A joke about your unpreparedness: "I've been worried about giving this speech for a while now. Fortunately, last night I slept like a baby – I woke up crying every two hours."
• A joke about the groom: "I just heard there was a competitive sweepstake on how long my speech should last. I put my money on 45 minutes, so make yourselves comfortable!"
• A humorous introduction about yourself: "Welcome everyone, my name is [Name]. And I've known [Groom] since we were kids. [Groom] hates it when I take all the attention away from [him/her], so as a mark of respect, please don't stand on the tables and chairs when you give me a standing ovation at the end of the speech."

Remember, the opening of your speech should be personal, exciting, and punchy. Cut out the formalities and wedding clichés and make it memorable!

How to compliment the bride

As a best man, you have free rein to be a little more risqué in your speech than the father of the bride or the groom, but it's important to keep things respectful and avoid objectifying the bridesmaids. While you can make a few self-deprecating jokes, it's important to remember that this day is about the bride and groom, so keep the focus on them.

Her appearance

Every bride wants to hear that they look beautiful, ravishing, magical, glamorous, and stunning. Compliment her hair, her face, and her overall vision. For example, "Linda, you look absolutely stunning. Your eyes are gorgeous, and your dress is perfect—it suits the venue so well."

The wedding planning

Planning a wedding is a serious labor of love. Call out the little things that caught your eye, such as the flowers, the table settings, or the food. "I can't believe how stunning these flowers are. You've done an amazing job with the planning, Linda. It's clear how much work and love you've put into this day."

Her relationship with the groom

On their wedding day, it's important to acknowledge the couple's commitment to each other. Avoid clichés by calling out specific elements of their relationship. "Ben brings out that belly laugh of yours better than anyone else I know. It's clear that you two are made for each other."

The ceremony

Don't let the reception overshadow the ceremony. Let the couple know if it touched you. "The ceremony was so meaningful. It was clear how much thought and work you both put into it."

From the heart

You can never go wrong with a heartfelt compliment. Tell the bride how special she is to you and what a good friend she's been. "Linda, you're such a wonderful friend, and I'm so happy for you. I know that you and Paul will have a long and happy life together."

How to thank the bridesmaids

The bridesmaids are the unsung heroes of any wedding day, so it's important to show your gratitude for all their help in bringing the special day together. Here are some ideas on how to thank them:

• Acknowledge their support and friendship: Express your appreciation for their presence and assistance, and mention specific examples of how they've helped you, such as calming your nerves, fixing your dress, or planning events like the hen do.
• Give a thoughtful gift: Consider their interests and preferences when choosing a gift. Personalised items, such as robes, champagne flutes, or jewellery, are always a nice touch. You could also treat them to a spa day, a mini-fête, or a professional photoshoot to create lasting memories.
• Write a heartfelt thank-you card: Put pen to paper and handwritten notes to each bridesmaid, expressing your gratitude and sharing a favourite anecdote or memory. Include a funny moment from the planning process or mention an upcoming event you're excited to share with them.
• Make a short toast: Consider making a toast to your bridesmaids during the wedding reception. It doesn't have to be long, but it's a nice way to publicly acknowledge their contributions and show your appreciation.
• Involve them in your wedding day: One way to thank your bridesmaids is to involve them in your special day. Ask them to participate in events like the first dance or a bridal party entrance. This will create lasting memories and show that you value their presence.
• Be mindful of boundaries: While it's expected to pay compliments to the bridesmaids, be mindful of not objectifying them or making lewd jokes. Keep your comments respectful and classy, focusing on their beauty and elegance rather than sexuality.

How to roast the groom

When writing a best man's speech, it's important to remember that it should be funny, but not cruel. While you want to roast the groom, you don't want to make him feel genuinely uncomfortable. Here are some tips and examples to help you strike the right balance:

Keep it Light and Friendly

It's all about having fun and celebrating the couple. Avoid jokes that are too personal or that might make the groom feel embarrassed. For example, you could say something like:

"I've been so worried about this speech. In fact, I've been tearing my hair out. (Point to a bald relative in the room.) And Uncle Dave!"

Make it Relatable

Share stories or anecdotes that the audience can relate to. This could be about the groom's appearance, habits, or even his sense of humour. For instance:

"I've heard Steve referred to as the Brad Pitt of his hometown... Sorry, I do beg your pardon. It's my notes... That should have been armpit."

Include Self-Deprecating Humour

It's not only safe, but it also makes you seem more humble and attractive. Make fun of yourself to show that you're a good sport and to take the edge off any potential awkwardness. For example:

"I must say, being chosen as the best man is almost as surprising as the time I tried to assemble Ikea furniture without looking at the instructions. Somehow, I got through both experiences, but I can't promise the speech will be as sturdy as that bookshelf."

Exaggerate and Observe

Exaggerate the groom's quirks or habits to create humorous scenarios. Observe the strange things about the groom that others might take for granted. For instance:

"There's a scandalous rumour circulating that Steve is now so skinny that he made the journey up here today by fax!"

Avoid Targeting the Bride

While it's okay to roast the groom, the wedding day is ultimately about celebrating the bride. Avoid jokes that could be seen as even mildly critical of her.

Be Prepared

Practice your speech beforehand, and don't be afraid to use notes during your delivery. A confident delivery will make your jokes land better and ensure the audience is comfortable.

How to close the speech

So, you've reached the end of your best man speech. You've introduced yourself, shared some anecdotes, and now it's time to bring it all together and finish on a high note. Here are some ideas on how to close your speech and leave a lasting impression:

• Keep it short and sweet: A concise ending is often the most effective. Thank the guests for their attention, wish the newlyweds a happy future, and propose a final toast to the couple. You can also invite all the guests to join in and raise their glasses. For example, "Thank you all for listening, and let's raise a glass to the happy couple. May their future be filled with love, laughter, and all their heart's desires. Cheers to the bride and groom!"
• End with a cheer: Start your closing paragraph by referencing the newlyweds as "Mr and Mrs" or using the groom's name and his "wife". This is a sure way to get an enthusiastic response from the guests. You can also include some self-deprecating humour here, which will leave everyone smiling. For instance, "Well, it's been an honour to stand here as John's best man and welcome his wife, Jane, into the family. Despite my nervous ramblings, I wish them all the best, and let's hope John's marriage is less chaotic than his best man's speech! Cheers to the happy couple!"
• Share a sentimental wish: While humour is important, it's also nice to end on a heartfelt note. Share a sincere wish for the couple's future, and you can even include a personalised quote or a meaningful line from a poem or song. For example, "May your love continue to grow and flourish, and may your journey together be filled with joy and adventure. As the poet Rumi once said, 'Lovers don't finally meet somewhere. They're in each other all along.' Cheers to the wonderful couple!"
• Thank the bridal party: Before concluding, take a moment to thank the bridal party, including the bridesmaids and groomsmen, for their contributions to the wedding. You can also acknowledge the parents of the couple and anyone else who played a special role. For instance, "I want to thank the bridal party, especially the bridesmaids, for their hard work and dedication in making this day so special. And to the parents of the bride and groom, thank you for your love and support. Finally, let's raise a glass to the newlyweds and wish them a lifetime of happiness!"
• Connect back to your opening: A clever way to end your speech is to circle back to your opening line or theme. This creates a sense of cohesion and leaves a lasting impression. For example, if you started with a story about how the couple met, you can end by wishing them a future filled with many more adventures together. Or, if you began with a humorous anecdote, you can tie it back to your closing remarks. "As I mentioned earlier, Tom and Sophie met in the most unusual way. Their love story began in a supermarket aisle, and it's been a wild ride ever since. So, let's raise a glass to the happy couple and wish them many more exciting adventures together!"

Frequently asked questions