Wedding Invitation Etiquette: Reception Cards

Wedding invitation suites are a major undertaking, and it's important to know what to include. A reception card is a traditional way to convey information about festivities after the wedding ceremony, especially if the reception is at a different location. It's not always necessary, but it is the most etiquette-correct way to inform guests of post-wedding plans. If the reception is at the same location, this information can be included on the invitation. However, if there are multiple events, a full itinerary is useful. This can be included on an insert card or on a wedding website.

When to send reception cards

The timing of sending out reception cards depends on whether you are referring to the wedding invitations, the RSVP deadline, or the thank-you cards.

Wedding Invitations

A traditional wedding invitation suite includes the main invitation, a response card, and any other enclosure cards containing helpful information for your guests (reception card, travel and accommodations card, attire card, wedding website card, etc.). It is recommended to send out wedding invitations six to eight weeks before your wedding date. This ensures that your guests have all the necessary information and can plan to attend your big day.

RSVP Deadline

The RSVP deadline for your wedding should be set for about one month before the wedding. This allows for a smooth finalisation of the guest list and helps with the planning and logistics of the wedding, especially if you are providing transportation or accommodation for your guests.

Thank-You Cards

It is considered proper etiquette to send thank-you cards to express your gratitude for your guests' attendance and gifts. For gifts received during the engagement party and bridal shower, send thank-you cards within two to three weeks. For gifts sent before the wedding, send a card as soon as possible, preferably before the wedding. For gifts given on the wedding day, mail a thank-you note within three months. Finally, for gifts received after the wedding, send a card within two to three weeks.

Who should receive them

Who should receive wedding reception cards?

If your wedding ceremony and reception are held in the same location, you typically don't need to send out a separate reception card. However, there are several occasions when sending out wedding reception cards is necessary, either alongside the wedding invitation or on its own.

If your ceremony and reception are at separate venues, it is helpful to include a reception card with your invitation suite. This ensures that guests have all the necessary information in one place, including the name, address, and start and end times of the reception venue.

If you've already had an intimate wedding ceremony, perhaps due to Covid-19 restrictions, and now want to celebrate with a larger group, you'll send out wedding reception invitations to everyone on your guest list. In this case, the invitation can be less formal and can match the theme of the party.

If you're having an intimate ceremony and a larger reception, you'll need to create two guest lists. One list is for those invited to both the ceremony and reception, and the other is for those invited only to the reception. It's considered poor etiquette not to invite everyone who witnessed the ceremony to the reception. When creating your guest lists, try to set clear and consistent rules, such as "only family and the wedding party" for the ceremony guest list, to avoid any tension or hurt feelings.

Wording and etiquette

The wording of your wedding invitations is important, but it needn't be too complicated. The most important rule is to create a beautiful invitation that represents you, your love, and the day to come, while also communicating the vital details of the wedding.

The first line of your wedding invitations is dedicated to the host of the wedding, also known as the party covering the expenses. Traditionally, this is the bride's parents, but nowadays, the groom's parents, the bride, the groom, or a combination of all four may be contributing. There is no official order or requirement to list the names, it's all up to personal preference.

If you are including step-parents, you could use wording such as:

> Mr. & Mrs. Flores, Mr. & Mrs. Hill, Mr. & Mrs. Byrne and Mr. & Mrs. Lin request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of Talia Flores & Stephen Byrne

If you want to honour a deceased parent, you could rearrange the wording to something like:

> Mr. & Mrs. Jon Flores and Mr. Tom Byrne & the late Mrs. Nancy Byrne request the honor of your company at the marriage of their children Talia Flores & Stephen Byrne

When listing the names of the couple, the bride's name typically precedes the groom's. Most commonly, the bride's first and middle names are used while the groom's full name is included. This is, of course, all up to personal style.

Next, you'll want to include the ceremony details so that your guests have no confusion about the date, time, location, and address. For a formal invitation, you might want to spell out the date and time. You can even add a QR code that links to your wedding website or provides directions.

It's also a good idea to let your guests know what to expect after the ceremony. If there's a cocktail hour or dancing and dinner, it's good to spell it all out here, or include your wedding website link that has all the information. If the reception is at a different location, include the address.

• Informal: "Dinner and dancing to follow"
• Formal: "An evening of celebration to follow"
• Different location: "Reception immediately following at _____"

If you're including dress code information, this is usually placed in the lower right-hand corner of the invitation.

Examples

Formal

> The honor of your presence is requested at the marriage of Talia Camila Flores and Stephen Anthony Byrne Saturday, the eleventh of June two thousand and twenty three at twelve o’clock in the afternoon Arctic Club Hotel 700 Third Avenue Seattle, Washington Reception to follow

Casual

> Together with their parents Talia Flores & Stephen Byrne invite you to share in their joy as they tie the knot June 11, 2024 12:00 pm Arctic Club Hotel 700 Third Avenue Seattle, Washington Dinner and dancing to follow

Reception cards vs. response cards

Wedding invitation suites can be a complex affair, with many different elements to consider. Response cards and reception cards are two such elements that serve distinct purposes.

Response Cards

Response or reply cards are included with a wedding invitation to give an accurate guest count for the reception. They are not used for ceremony-only invitations. Response cards are usually self-addressed and stamped, making it easy for guests to RSVP by mail. They may also include an email address or phone number for digital RSVPs. It is common to include a "reply by" date, typically two to four weeks before the wedding, to give hosts time to follow up with guests and provide final head counts to caterers.

The traditional phrasing on the response card is "the favour of a response is requested by", indicating that the wedding will be hosted by the bride's parents in a place of worship. Less formal options include "Kindly reply by..." or "Please respond by...". The response card usually includes an "M" line, where guests write their names, and accept and decline lines, traditionally worded as "accepts with pleasure" and "declines with regret".

Reception Cards

Reception cards are used to inform guests about the location of the reception, particularly when the ceremony and reception are held in different places. They include details such as the time and address of the reception and may indicate the formality of the event, such as "Breakfast Reception" or "Dinner Reception". If the reception is held at the same location as the ceremony, a reception card is usually not included.

In summary, response cards are used to gather RSVPs and determine guest counts, while reception cards provide information about the reception venue and are especially useful when the ceremony and reception are in separate locations.

Alternative ways to share reception details

While it's not mandatory to include reception cards in your wedding invitations, it's a good idea if your wedding reception is at a different location from the ceremony. If you'd like to skip the reception cards, here are some alternative ways to share the reception details with your guests:

• Wedding Website: Create a wedding website to share all the details of your wedding, including the reception information. You can include the website link on a small card within your invitation suite.
• Response Cards: Include response cards with pre-addressed envelopes and stamps for your guests' convenience. You can also add checkboxes for meal choices if you're offering options like chicken, fish, or vegetarian.
• Direction Cards: Provide direction cards with clear and legible fonts to guide your guests to the reception venue. This is especially helpful for guests who may not have smartphones or access to maps.
• Weekend Events Card: If your wedding spans multiple days and includes events like a welcome reception or a day-after brunch, include an itinerary card so guests can plan their attendance and attire accordingly.
• Accommodations Card: If you have guests travelling from out of town, provide a separate card with hotel recommendations and transportation details. You can also include a deadline for making hotel reservations.
• Invitation Wrapper: Use an invitation wrapper, such as a belly band or silk ribbon, to hold all the pieces of your invitation suite together. This adds a coordinated and glamorous touch to your invitations.
• Word of Mouth: For an adults-only reception, in addition to addressing the invitations accordingly, spread the information through word of mouth to ensure that your guests are aware.

Remember, it's essential to provide clear and concise information about your wedding reception to ensure your guests can participate in the celebrations with ease.

Frequently asked questions