Plus Ones For Bridesmaids: Who Gets The Guest List Nod?

The big day is approaching, and you want to ensure your bridesmaids are happy. But do you need to give them all a plus one? Well, it's certainly a nice gesture, and one that's generally well-advised. After all, your bridesmaids have likely spent a lot of time and money helping you plan your wedding, so it's a chance to show your appreciation. Plus, it can be awkward for a bridesmaid to attend a wedding without a date, especially if they don't know many other guests. However, it's not always necessary to offer a plus one, and it may depend on your budget and space constraints. If you're on a tight budget, you might need to be more selective about who gets a plus one, but it's generally good etiquette to offer one to any bridesmaid in a serious relationship.

Long-term relationships and plus-ones

If your bridesmaids are in long-term relationships, it is generally considered good etiquette to invite their partners to the wedding. This is especially important if your bridesmaids have been heavily involved in the wedding planning process and have spent a lot of time and money on the wedding. It is a nice way to thank them for their support and can also make them feel more comfortable at the wedding.

Some couples choose to only invite the partners of married bridesmaids or those who are engaged or living together. However, this can cause issues if one of your bridesmaids is in a serious long-term relationship, even if they are not married or engaged. It is important to consider how your bridesmaids might feel if their partners are not invited, especially if they are the only one in the bridal party whose partner is excluded.

If you are on a tight budget, it might not be possible to invite everyone with a plus-one. In this case, you could consider only inviting the partners of those in the bridal party. This recognises the extra time and effort that your bridesmaids have put into your wedding.

If you do decide to invite the partners of your bridesmaids, it is a nice gesture to seat them together at the reception. This can be at the head table or at a nearby table so that they can still socialise with their partners during the meal. Separating couples by having a men's side and a women's side at the head table is an outdated concept and can make guests feel uncomfortable.

If you are unable to seat partners together, you could consider having a sweetheart table for just the bride and groom. This allows the bridal party to sit with their partners and guests. It is also worth noting that partners will be able to socialise together during the ceremony and cocktail hour, even if the bridal party is busy with photos.

In conclusion, it is generally considered good etiquette to invite the long-term partners of your bridesmaids to your wedding. This recognises the importance of their relationship and their commitment to your wedding. However, it is your wedding day, and ultimately the decision is up to you and your partner.

Budgeting for plus-ones

Determine your guest list and budget:

Start by deciding on the number of guests you wish to invite, including plus-ones for the wedding party and other guests. As a general rule, budget at least $100 per guest. The cost of catering and beverages will depend on the number of guests, so a smaller, more intimate celebration can help reduce costs.

Research prices and compare vendors:

The cost of catering, entertainment, photography, and other services can vary depending on your location and the vendors you choose. Use wedding planning websites, search engines, and wedding conventions to research and compare prices. Look for packages that include multiple services, such as in-venue catering and entertainment, to save costs.

Allocate your budget accordingly:

Break down your budget into categories such as venue, catering, attire, flowers, decorations, music/entertainment, photography/videography, officiant, stationery, and gifts/favors. Allocate a percentage of your budget to each category based on your priorities. For example, if you prioritize having great food, allocate a larger portion of your budget to catering.

Consider hidden costs:

Don't forget to account for hidden costs such as wedding party proposals, bachelor/bachelorette parties, marriage licenses, and postage for invitations and stationery. Build some flexibility into your budget to accommodate unexpected expenses.

Be mindful of your bridesmaids' expenses:

Remember that your bridesmaids have already spent a significant amount of money on attire, lodging, transportation, and other expenses. As a courtesy, it is generally recommended to allow them to bring a plus-one, especially if they are in a long-term relationship.

Communicate with your bridesmaids:

If you are unable to accommodate all plus-ones due to budget constraints, have an open and honest conversation with your bridesmaids. Let them know about your financial limitations and ask for their understanding. Offer the option of bringing a plus-one if it is important to them, but be transparent about any financial contributions you may need from them to make it work.

Remember, the most important thing is to ensure that your bridesmaids feel valued and appreciated for their time, love, and support throughout the wedding planning process.

Seating arrangements

Firstly, if any of your bridesmaids or groomsmen are in a relationship, their significant other should be invited and included in the seating arrangement. You can choose to seat them at the head table with the rest of the bridal party, or have a separate table nearby for the wedding party's dates. This allows them to spend time with their partners during the reception.

Secondly, if any of your bridesmaids or groomsmen are single, you may consider giving them the option to bring a plus-one. This is especially important if they don't know many people at the wedding, as it can make them feel more comfortable and less awkward. However, this is not a requirement and you can choose to only allow plus-ones for those in serious, long-term relationships.

Thirdly, you may want to consider the size and layout of your venue when deciding on seating arrangements. If including plus-ones at the head table makes it too large, you can opt to have them seated at other tables nearby, or choose a sweetheart table for just the happy couple. Alternatively, you can include the immediate family at the head table, or only have a few close friends sit with you.

Finally, don't be afraid to break tradition and personalise your seating arrangements to suit your needs and preferences. You can choose to forgo a head table entirely and sit at a regular guest table, or enjoy an intimate dinner at a sweetheart table just for two. Ultimately, the decision is yours and you should choose the option that makes the most sense for you and your wedding party.

Single bridesmaids and plus-ones

There are differing opinions on whether single bridesmaids should be given a plus-one. Some people argue that all bridesmaids, regardless of their relationship status, should be offered a plus-one as a courtesy, especially considering the time, money, and energy they have devoted to the wedding. It is also argued that going to a wedding alone can be awkward and unpleasant, and that it is only fair to allow single bridesmaids to bring a date, particularly if they are the only bridesmaid who is single.

On the other hand, some people believe that single bridesmaids do not need a plus-one, especially if they are close friends or family with the bride and groom and will know other guests at the wedding. It is also suggested that single bridesmaids should only be given a plus-one if they are in a serious, long-term relationship, rather than a more casual or new relationship.

Ultimately, the decision of whether to offer a plus-one to a single bridesmaid is up to the bride and groom, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer. It is important to consider the individual circumstances and preferences of the bridesmaid in question, as well as the budget and space constraints of the wedding.

Serious relationships and plus-ones

If your bridesmaids are in serious, long-term relationships, it is generally considered good etiquette to invite their partners to the wedding. This is especially true if the couple lives together. In this case, it is standard to send one invitation addressed to both parties, rather than to one half of the couple with a plus-one.

If your bridesmaid is in a serious relationship, but you don't know their partner, it is still considered polite to invite them as a pair. You could arrange to meet them beforehand to get to know them.

If your bridesmaid is in a serious relationship, but not yet living with their partner, it is still considered good etiquette to invite their partner. However, if your bridesmaid is single, it is not standard to offer a plus-one.

If your bridesmaid is in a serious relationship, their partner should be invited to the wedding. It is courteous to offer a plus-one to members of the wedding party, as they have likely dedicated a lot of time and money to your wedding.

However, their partners do not need to be involved in the wedding party. They can meet up with their partner at the reception. It is a nice gesture to seat partners together, rather than separating them with a head table/wedding party table.

If you are on a tight budget, you may not be able to offer plus-ones to all guests. In this case, it is generally considered acceptable to only offer plus-ones to guests in serious relationships, and not to single guests.

However, if your bridesmaid is single, it is still considered good etiquette to offer them a plus-one, even if other single guests are not offered the same.

Frequently asked questions