George Boyle
When it comes to addressing wedding invitations, there are a few options to consider. The traditional approach includes using titles such as Mr., Mrs., Ms., and Miss. This is often seen as more formal and is commonly used for older guests or those with professional titles, such as doctors or lawyers. However, it's worth noting that some people may have strong preferences for specific titles, especially regarding Mrs. and Ms., so it's important to consider your guests' preferences if you choose to use titles. Alternatively, a more modern and casual approach is to omit titles altogether and simply use first and last names. This can be especially suitable for less formal weddings and younger guests. Ultimately, the choice of whether or not to use titles depends on the couple's preference and the desired tone of the wedding invitation.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Outer envelope | Formal, full name(s) and title(s) |
| Inner envelope | Informal, first name(s) and title(s) or last name(s) and title(s) |
| Married couple, same last name | "Mr. and Mrs. [Husband's first name] [Last name]" |
| Married couple, woman kept maiden name | "Mr. [Man's first name] [Man's last name] and Mrs. [Woman's first name] [Woman's maiden name]" |
| Married couple, different last names | "Ms. [Woman's first name] [Woman's last name] and Mr. [Man's first name] [Man's last name]" |
| Married couple, one hyphenated last name | "Mr. [Man's first name] [Man's last name] and Mr. [Man's first name] [Man's first name]-[Man's second name] [Man's last name]" |
| Unmarried couple | "Mr. [Man's first name] [Man's last name] and Ms. [Woman's first name] [Woman's last name]" |
| Single woman | "Ms." or "Miss" if under 18 |
| Single man | "Mr." if over 18 |
| Married couple, one person is a doctor | "Doctor [Doctor's first name] [Doctor's last name] and Ms. [Spouse's first name] [Spouse's last name]" |
| Married couple, both are doctors | "The Doctors [Last name]" |
| Couple with distinguished titles | Use titles, e.g. "The Honorable", "Lieutenant", "Esq." |
| Family with children under 18 | List children's names by seniority underneath parents' names, omitting last names |
| Family with children over 18 | Children receive separate invitations |
What You'll Learn
Married couples with the same last name
When addressing wedding invitations to married couples with the same last name, there are a few etiquette rules to follow. The outer envelope should be formal and include the recipient's full name and their personal title. For heterosexual couples, use "Mr." and "Mrs." and spell out the husband's first and last name. For example:
> "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Warren"
For same-sex couples, either name can go first. If the couple is sensitive to the wife's name being left out, you can write:
> "Mr. Thomas Warren and Mrs. Michelle Warren"
The inner envelope is more informal, and you can choose to leave out one or more elements of the formal name format. For example:
> "Mr. and Mrs. Warren" or "Thomas and Michelle"
If you feel that personal titles are too restrictive and exclusive, you can choose to forgo them and use only first and last names. It is also important to note that "Mx." might be the preferred title for a non-binary guest. Always double-check your guests' preferred personal titles before addressing the invitations.
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Married couples with different last names
When addressing wedding invitations to married couples with different last names, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, it is important to use the correct titles and names for each individual. The outer envelope should include both full names with an "and" between them to indicate that they are married. For example, "Ms. Maria Stevens and Mr. David Estevez". If the combined names are too long to fit on one line, list them separately.
When it comes to the inner envelope, you have a bit more flexibility. You can use the same format as the outer envelope or simply address it to "Ms. Stevens and Mr. Estevez" or "Maria and David". It is also worth noting that if the couple has children, their names should be included on the inner envelope as well.
Another important consideration is the order in which you write the names. If you are inviting a married couple with different last names, write their names on the same line with the person you are closest to first. If you are equally close to both, list the names in alphabetical order. This differs from unmarried couples living together, where each name should be written on a separate line.
Additionally, be mindful of any distinguished titles held by either member of the couple, such as doctors, lawyers, judges, or military personnel. The person with the distinguished title should always be named first.
Finally, remember to double-check each attendee's preferred titles and names beforehand, especially if they have non-binary gender identities or other specific preferences.
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Unmarried couples
When addressing wedding invitations to unmarried couples, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, it is important to use the correct titles or prefixes for each individual. For unmarried women, use "Ms." or "Miss" if she is under 18 years old. For unmarried men, use "Mr." if he is over 18; otherwise, no title is necessary. You can also include the middle name of the guest if you know it, but avoid using initials or abbreviations.
When addressing the outer envelope for an unmarried couple, list both names on separate lines, with the woman's name first. This format signifies that the couple is not married:
Ms. Valerie Warrington
Mr. Brian Freeman
612 Maple Lane
Fairhope, Alabama 36000
If you prefer a more modern approach, you can list both names on the same line, with the person you are closest to first, or alphabetically by last name:
Ms. Rachel Green and Mr. Ross Geller
For the inner envelope, you have more flexibility. You can use courtesy titles and last names or just first names if you are close with the couple:
Ms. Green and Mr. Geller or Rachel and Ross
If the unmarried couple does not live together, it is proper etiquette to send separate invitations to each guest.
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Single invitees
When addressing wedding invitations to single invitees, the proper prefix should be used. For male guests, use "Mr." followed by their full name. For female guests, use "Ms." followed by their full name. For non-binary guests, use the abbreviation "Mx." followed by their full name.
If the single guest is under the age of 18, the guidelines are slightly different. For male guests under 18, no title is necessary. For female guests under 18, use "Miss" instead of "Ms."
If your single guest has been offered a plus one, you don't need to indicate this on the outer envelope. Simply write the guest's name followed by "and guest" on the inner envelope. If you know the name of the plus one, include it on the inner envelope as well.
Outer envelope, male guest over 18: "Mr. James Montgomery"
Inner envelope, male guest over 18: "Mr. Montgomery and guest" or "James and guest"
Outer envelope, female guest over 18: "Ms. Stephanie Chen"
Inner envelope, female guest over 18: "Ms. Chen and guest" or "Stephanie and guest"
Outer envelope, male guest under 18: "George Constanza"
Inner envelope, male guest under 18: "George and guest"
Outer envelope, female guest under 18: "Miss Donna-Jo Tanner"
Inner envelope, female guest under 18: "Miss Donna-Jo and guest"
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Guests with distinguished titles
When it comes to addressing wedding invitations to guests with distinguished titles, it is proper etiquette to use their titles on the envelopes. This includes guests with titles such as doctors, lawyers, judges, military personnel, reverends, and rabbis. Here are some examples of how to address wedding invitations to these guests:
Doctors:
- For a married couple where one person is a doctor:
- On the outer envelope: "Doctor Tami Takata and Ms. Christina Smith"
- On the inner envelope: "Dr. Takata and Ms. Smith" or "Tami and Christina"
- For a married couple where both are doctors:
- On the outer envelope: "The Doctors Smith" or "Drs. Matthew and Angela Smith"
- On the inner envelope: "The Doctors Smith" or "Matthew and Angela"
- For a married couple where one has a hyphenated last name:
- On the outer envelope: "Doctor Matthew Smith and Doctor Angela Griggs-Smith"
- On the inner envelope: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Griggs-Smith" or "Matthew and Angela"
Military Personnel:
- For a couple where one is a military officer:
- On the outer envelope: "Lieutenant Jonathan Kelly, US Navy and Mrs. Jane Kelly"
- On the inner envelope: "Lieutenant Kelly, US Navy and Mrs. Kelly"
- For a couple where both are military officers:
- On the outer envelope: "Captains Jane and Jonathan Kelly, US Navy"
- On the inner envelope: "The Captains Kelly"
Lawyers:
- For a couple where one is a lawyer:
- On the outer envelope: "Michelle Brown, Esq. and Mr. John Brown"
- On the inner envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. Brown"
- For a couple where both are lawyers:
- On the outer envelope: "Michelle Brown, Esq. and John Brown, Esq."
Judges:
- For a judge who is married:
- On the outer envelope: "The Honorable Gina Rodriguez and Mx. Alice Rodriguez"
- On the inner envelope: "Judge Rodriguez and Mx. Rodriguez"
- For a single judge:
- On the outer envelope: "The Honorable Josephine Wood"
- On the inner envelope: "Judge Wood"
When addressing guests with distinguished titles, it is important to list the person with the title first on the outer envelope, regardless of gender. For the inner envelope, you can use their first names or a combination of their title and last name.
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Frequently asked questions
No, it is not necessary to use titles when addressing wedding invitations. Using first and last names is often considered more modern and inclusive, especially when guests may have titles that you are unsure of.
Using titles can be a nice way to honour your guests' achievements, such as earning a doctorate or serving in the military. It can also set a more formal tone for your wedding, which may be appropriate depending on the style of your event.
Using titles can be tricky, as it is important to use the correct title for each guest. Using incorrect titles can be offensive to some, and it can also be challenging to fit long titles on the invitation, especially if both members of a couple have titles.
