Who Pays For Bridesmaids' Meals?

Being a bridesmaid is a huge honour, but it's also a major financial commitment. There are a lot of expenses that come with the role, and it's important to be aware of these costs before agreeing to take on the responsibility. While the specific expenses may vary depending on the wedding and the couple, there are some general costs that bridesmaids can typically expect to cover. These include the bridesmaid dress and accessories, hair and makeup, travel and accommodations, and contributions to pre-wedding events such as the bridal shower and bachelorette party. It's also customary for bridesmaids to give a wedding gift to the couple. However, it's important to note that the bride should be upfront about any financial expectations and that honest communication about budgets is key to avoiding any misunderstandings or resentment.

Bridesmaids' dresses

Planning a wedding can be a stressful task, especially when it comes to finances. While the bride often has a vision for her bridesmaids' dresses, the method of choosing and purchasing them varies.

Who Pays for the Bridesmaids' Dresses?

In most cases, bridesmaids are expected to pay for their own dresses and accessories. However, some brides may opt for a more relaxed approach, allowing bridesmaids to choose their own dresses within a specific colour palette, which can be more affordable and reusable. If the bride requests specific outfits, it is considerate to subsidise the cost or choose affordable options.

Choosing the Dresses

When selecting dresses, consider the financial situation of your bridal party. Couture gowns and custom suits may not be feasible for everyone. Opt for affordable options or mix-and-match styles to reduce the financial burden on your bridesmaids.

Other Costs

In addition to dresses, bridesmaids typically cover costs such as travel, lodging, bridal shower, bachelorette party, and wedding day essentials. However, the bride usually pays for bouquets, transportation, and snacks on the wedding day.

Communication is Key

It is essential to have open and transparent conversations about finances to avoid misunderstandings and resentment. Be mindful of your bridesmaids' budgets and adjust expectations accordingly.

Sample Dresses and Swatches

To make informed choices, consider ordering sample dresses and swatches to try on and view the colours and fabrics in person. This can help ensure your bridesmaids are comfortable and confident in their selections.

Online Options

Online retailers like Revelry and Birdy Grey offer a variety of bridesmaid dress options, including different colours, styles, and price ranges. They also provide swatches and samples to help you make the right choice for your special day.

Bachelorette parties

Planning a bachelorette party is one of the most fun parts of being a bridesmaid. However, it can be a costly affair, and it's important to be mindful of budgets. Here are some tips on how to navigate the financial aspects of bachelorette parties:

Who Pays for What?

The short answer is that everyone is expected to contribute to the costs. However, not all costs should be split equally. Here's a breakdown of the expenses:

• Travel and Accommodations: Each person is typically responsible for covering their own travel expenses, such as flights, rental cars, or public transportation. For destination bachelorette parties, guests should be informed well in advance to allow them to save and book their travel arrangements.
• Meals: Bridesmaids usually pay for meals out, treating the bride. This can be a small extra expense, but it's a thoughtful way to celebrate the bride. To keep costs down, opt for casual dining options or cooking at home.
• Decorations, Favors, and Accessories: The maid of honour and bridesmaids typically split these costs evenly. These items don't have to be expensive and can be purchased cheaply online.
• Special Experiences and Group Activities: These are considered optional and should be discussed within the budget of each attendee. If the bride suggests a costly activity, she should offer to treat the group. Similarly, if the group wants to surprise the bride with an activity, they should cover the cost.
• Safety Measures: The bride is responsible for covering the costs of safety measures, such as chartered rides, to ensure everyone gets to and from parties safely.

Planning and Budgeting:

It's essential to have open and transparent conversations about money. Here are some tips for planning and budgeting:

• The maid of honour or the person in charge of planning should discuss the budget with each guest individually to understand their comfort level and financial situation.
• Establish a realistic budget that accommodates everyone's requests and financial status. Be transparent about the budget and share pricing information for accommodations, activities, and meals so that guests can plan accordingly.
• Use cost-splitting apps like Splitwise and Venmo to simplify the payment process and make it easier to track expenses.
• Look for affordable alternatives, such as staying in an Airbnb instead of a resort or including budget-friendly activities like local hikes or window shopping.
• If the bride has a destination in mind, she should be mindful of the financial burden on her guests and potentially offer to help with lodging or other expenses.

Bachelorette Party Alternatives:

If a traditional bachelorette party is out of budget, there are plenty of alternative options to celebrate:

• A downtown bar crawl in your own city.
• An at-home movie night.
• A pottery-making session or a group cooking class.
• A bridal shower hosted by the maid of honour or a mix of parties.

Remember, the most important aspect of a bachelorette party is celebrating the bride-to-be surrounded by her loved ones. It's all about having fun and creating memorable experiences, not breaking the bank.

Bridal showers

Planning a wedding can be an exciting yet expensive affair, not just for the couple but also for the guests and the bridal party. The bridal shower, in particular, can be a significant expense for the host. So, who pays for the bridal shower?

Who Pays for the Bridal Shower?

The host is typically responsible for paying for the bridal shower. The maid of honour usually takes on this role, but other members of the bridal party, the couple's relatives, friends, or even the couple themselves may also contribute. In some cases, the bride may have multiple bridal showers hosted by different groups.

The cost of a bridal shower can vary depending on factors such as the venue, guest count, food, drinks, and decorations. For an event at a venue, a budget of $125 per person is recommended to cover expenses such as paper invitations, food, drinks, cake, floral centrepieces, games, and prizes. For a more affordable option, consider an at-home event with light refreshments, which can be budgeted at $40 per person.

The bridal party, including the bridesmaids, is typically expected to contribute financially to the bridal shower, especially if they are hosting the event. The amount they contribute may depend on the type of party and the host. They may be asked to cover expenses such as decorations, favours, or special surprises for the bride-to-be. It is important to have open and transparent communication about budgets and expectations to avoid any misunderstandings or financial strain.

If the bridal party is unable to contribute financially, they can still help in other ways, such as sending out invitations, setting up the venue, decorating, or cleaning up after the event. They can also offer to help with specific tasks or day-of duties to support the host and ensure the bridal shower runs smoothly.

Hair and makeup

There is no definitive answer to the question of who pays for the bridal party's hair and makeup. It is generally considered the responsibility of either the bride or the bridesmaids. Some brides opt to cover the cost as a "thank you" to their friends for their support. However, this is not always feasible, especially for large bridal parties, and some brides may ask their bridesmaids to pay for their hair and makeup services.

If the bride can afford it, it is considered courteous to cover the cost, especially if she requires a specific look that may be difficult to achieve without professional help. In this case, it is expected that the bride will foot the bill.

If the bride is unable or unwilling to pay for all the bridesmaids' hair and makeup, there are a few options to consider:

• The bride can pay for just one service (hair or makeup) and allow bridesmaids to DIY the other, or pay for it themselves.
• The bride can cover the gratuities for the hair and makeup services if the bridesmaids pay for the services themselves.
• The bride can ask a talented friend to help any bridesmaid who wants professional hair or makeup but is unable to afford it.
• The bride can make hair and makeup optional and allow bridesmaids to DIY.

It is important to be transparent about expectations and decide on a payment plan early in the planning process. This will help the bridal party prepare and budget accordingly, avoiding any last-minute surprises.

Travel and accommodation

Traditionally, bridesmaids are responsible for their own travel and lodging for the wedding night or weekend. However, this can quickly add up, so couples should be mindful of the total costs they are asking their bridal party to incur. This is especially important if the bridesmaids have also been expected to travel for a bachelorette party.

If the wedding is in a remote location, the couple may want to consider subsidising some of the travel and accommodation costs for their bridal party. This could be by offering a discounted group rate at a hotel, or even providing accommodation for the bridal party at the wedding venue the night before the wedding.

If the couple is unable to provide financial support, they should at least be flexible with the bridal party's travel and accommodation arrangements. For example, if the bridesmaids are paying for their own accommodation, the couple should not insist on an expensive room at a particular hotel.

It is also important to give the bridal party plenty of notice about the wedding and any associated travel requirements, as most people will need time to budget and plan their finances.

Communication is Key

The best way to navigate the tricky topic of finances is through open and honest communication. The couple should be transparent about what they are able to cover financially, and the bridal party should likewise be clear about what they can afford to contribute.

It is also important to remember that each wedding and each bridal party member's financial situation is unique, so flexibility and compromise are key. The couple may want to consider asking each bridesmaid about their budget for various expenses and being willing to adapt their expectations accordingly.

Ultimately, if the couple is insisting on specific arrangements for travel and accommodation, they should probably be prepared to pay for it.

Frequently asked questions