The best man is expected to give a gift to the groom or to coordinate a group gift from the groomsmen. The best man's gift to the groom should be something more special than the other groomsmen's gifts. It is usually given at the bachelor's dinner or rehearsal dinner, or on the morning of the wedding. The gift should be something that the groom will appreciate and that reflects the friendship between the two men. It is also common for the best man to give a gift to the couple, which is typically given at the wedding reception and addressed to the bride. The cost of the gift is generally around $75-$150, but it is important to give something thoughtful and tasteful rather than extravagant.
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Should the best man give a gift? | Yes |
Who should the gift be for? | The groom, or the bride and groom |
When should the gift be given? | Morning of the wedding, or at the bachelor party/rehearsal dinner |
Should the gift be personalised? | Yes |
Should the gift be practical? | Yes |
Should the gift be expensive? | No, but it should be thoughtful |
What You'll Learn
Best man's gift to the groom
The best man is expected to give the groom a gift or organise a group gift from the groomsmen. This is in addition to the cost of the bachelor party, travel, accommodation, and the best man's own wedding attire.
The best man's gift to the groom should be something meaningful and personal, but it needn't be overly expensive. It could be something practical, like a garment duffle bag, or something fun, like a local pub crawl ticket. It could also be something that commemorates the day, like a personalised whiskey glass or a custom wedding party illustration.
- Monogrammed travel set
- Personalised pocket watch
- Engraved alcohol bottle
- Quirky cufflinks
- Stylish sunglasses
- Personalised accessory case
- Cigar humidor gift set
- Whiskey-infused toothpicks
- Craft beer subscription
- MLB ballpark pint glasses
- Ticket stub diary
- Photo-printed golf ball set
- Hanging toiletry bag
- Beard grooming set
- Men's waffle robe
- Bluetooth speaker and water bottle
- First dance song wall art
- Anniversary wine box
- Best man picture frame
- Personalised cufflinks
- Personalised beer mug
- Personalised money clip
- Tickets to his favourite sports team
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Best man's gift to the couple
As the best man, you'll be expected to give the couple a gift. This is in addition to your other expenses, such as your tuxedo rental, travel and accommodation, and the bachelor party.
The amount you spend is up to you and your budget, but sources suggest that $100 to $200 is acceptable, and $500 is too much. You could also give a gift from the couple's wedding registry, or a modest cash gift.
- A pair of crystal whisky glasses
- A cigar humidor
- A personalised illustration of the wedding party
- A personalised accessory case
- An anniversary wine box
- A gift box of worldwide assorted coffee
- Personalised cufflinks
- A personalised beer mug
- A cocktail subscription box
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Best man's speech
Giving a best man speech is a great honour and a big responsibility. It is your chance to celebrate the groom, entertain the guests, and show your support for the happy couple. Here is a guide to help you craft a memorable speech:
Start with Gratitude
Thank the hosts and mention your relationship with the groom. You can also thank the couple for choosing you to be the best man.
Share a Story
Share a short, positive, and entertaining anecdote about the groom. It could be a funny, heartwarming, or slightly embarrassing story that showcases the groom's personality and your relationship with him. If you are struggling for ideas, ask mutual friends—they might remember some great stories you shared.
Compliment the Couple
Say something nice about the couple and their relationship. Talk about how the bride has positively impacted the groom. Mention how they complement each other and wish them a happy future together.
Keep it Short and Sweet
Aim for sincerity over length. As a rule of thumb, shorter is better. Try to keep your speech under 10 minutes, and preferably closer to 5.
Practice, Practice, Practice
Prepare your speech in advance and practice as much as possible. Rehearse it multiple times to familiarise yourself with the content, timing, and flow. Practising in front of a mirror or with a trusted friend can help refine your delivery for a polished performance. Remember, the more you practice, the more confident you will become.
Calming Your Nerves
It is natural to feel nervous before giving a speech. To calm yourself, take deep breaths and slow down. Visualise yourself as a great speaker. Having a drink or two before your speech can help, but be careful—it can also lead to disaster.
Connect with the Audience
Make eye contact, speak clearly, use hand gestures, and express your emotions genuinely. Even the best speech will lose its power if you're looking at the ground and mumbling.
Avoid Certain Topics
Do not comment on anyone's appearance or tell embarrassing or humiliating anecdotes, even about the groom. Avoid need-to-know stories that include details like pregnancy scares or drug use. Steer clear of misogynistic jokes and do not mention the bride's former relationships.
Gift-Giving
As for gifts, it is customary for the best man to give the couple a wedding gift. This could be something from their registry, a modest cash gift, or a more creative and sentimental present. It is not obligatory, but it is a nice gesture.
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Best man's attire
The best man's attire will depend on the dress code, season, time of day, and venue of the wedding. Here are some tips to help you choose the perfect outfit:
Dress Code
- White Tie: This is the most formal dress code. Wear a tuxedo with a black or white jacket, a bow tie (which can be white or black), and black shoes.
- Black Tie: Wear a traditional black tuxedo, a white tux shirt, a black bow tie, and black patent leather shoes. You can also add accessories like a pocket square, suspenders, or button studs.
- Black Tie Optional: Wear a dark suit and tie, or a tuxedo if possible. You can also wear a black satin necktie or a bow tie with a pattern.
- Creative Black Tie: Wear a tux, but feel free to branch out with a contrasting jacket and black tux pants, or a colourful suit.
- Cocktail Attire: Wear a medium-dark suit, a white dress shirt, and a punchy necktie or bow tie.
- Casual: Wear dress pants and a blazer, or a suit with a dress shirt and dress shoes.
Season
- Fall: Layer with a vest that can be easily removed. Incorporate colours of the season like brown and blackwatch tartan.
- Winter: Velvet is a great fabric choice for the colder months.
- Spring: Go for a light grey or blue suit. You can also add colour with a pink or grey dress shirt.
- Summer: Wear a light-coloured suit or a white dinner jacket to stay cool.
Time of Day
- Daytime: Lighter-coloured suits are a better choice than black, which can get too warm in the sun.
- Nighttime: Dark suits and ties are a good choice for evening weddings.
Venue
- Beach: Go for a light-coloured suit or a white dinner jacket.
- Cruise Ship: A white dinner jacket is perfect for a tropical climate.
- Mountain: Wear dark colours and a textured tie to complement the rugged setting.
- Garden: A light-coloured suit in grey or blue is a safe choice, but you can also add a subtle floral tie.
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Best man's duties
The best man has a lot of responsibilities, from planning the bachelor party to making sure the groom gets to the altar on time. But one question that often comes up is whether the best man is expected to give a gift to the groom.
The short answer is yes, the best man is expected to give the groom a gift, or at least coordinate a group gift from the groomsmen. This is in addition to all the other duties the best man takes on, such as providing moral support during the ring selection, leading the groomsmen, shopping for formalwear, serving as a counselor and confidant, and of course, giving a best man speech.
While it's not mandatory, it's considered a nice gesture for the best man to give the groom a gift that is personal and meaningful. This could be something like a pair of crystal whisky glasses, a cigar humidor, or even just a nice bottle of his favourite liquor. If the best man is feeling creative, he could also opt for a more sentimental gift, such as a custom illustration of the wedding party or a personalised accessory case for the groom's new wedding ring.
In terms of timing, it's generally a good idea to give the gift before the wedding, either at the rehearsal dinner or even the morning of the wedding. This is a way to show appreciation for the best man's hard work and to surprise him on such an emotional day.
So, while it's not an official duty, getting a gift for the groom is definitely something that a best man should consider as part of his overall responsibilities.
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Frequently asked questions
Yes, it is expected that the best man will either purchase a gift for the groom or coordinate a group gift from the groomsmen.
The best man's gift to the groom should be something the groom will appreciate and use. It could be something practical, like a garment duffle bag, or something more sentimental, like a custom illustration of the wedding party.
The amount the best man spends on a gift depends on their budget and relationship with the groom. Some sources suggest a range of \$75 to \$150, while others recommend around \$100. It's important to consider the other costs incurred by the best man, such as the tuxedo rental, bachelor party, and hotel room.