Mixing Wedding Parties: Can Couples Be Attendants?

Wedding traditions have evolved over the years, with couples moving away from gender-based norms and embracing more inclusive practices. One notable shift is the growing trend of couples ditching the traditional bridesmaids and groomsmen setup. Instead, they are opting for a more flexible approach, with bridesmen, groomswomen, and even a best woman or man of honour. This evolution reflects a modern perspective, where wedding party roles are assigned based on relationships rather than gender.

Couples are increasingly ditching traditional bridesmaids and groomsmen

It's your wedding, and you don't have to follow any rules! Wedding traditions have evolved over the years, and gender norms are no exception. The latest trend sees couples ditching the traditional gendered wedding party and mixing things up with groomswomen, bridesmen, and even a "best woman" or "man of honour".

People are moving away from choosing wedding parties based on gender and instead opting for their closest friends, regardless of gender. As Jen Glantz, author of "Always a Bridesmaid for Hire", told Glamour:

> "It's becoming more of a norm to stray away from wedding traditions that don't quite live up to the modern age we are living in... The rule that men have to just be groomsmen and female friends have to just be bridesmaids has gone out the door."

Instead of having the men on one side and the women on the other, couples are mixing it up. This could mean having a "best woman" or "man of honour" standing by your side or including groomswomen and bridesmen in the wedding party. You could also have your wedding party walk down the aisle with their partners instead of pairing them with a member of the opposite gender.

One of the advantages of having gendered wedding parties is the aesthetic and theme that comes with coordinating outfits. However, this tradition is also evolving, with bridesmaids now often wearing the same colour but different styles. When it comes to mixed-gender wedding parties, you can still coordinate outfits by choosing a common element, such as colour, a colour pattern, or a particular print. For example, you could have the bridesmaids' dress colour match the groomsmen's ties, pocket squares, or socks.

Final Thoughts

At the end of the day, it's your wedding, and you can choose your wedding party based on the people who are most important to you, regardless of their gender. This new tradition is a reflection of modern times and choosing your wedding party based on relationships rather than gender norms.

Bridesmaids and groomsmen don't have to match

That said, there are advantages to matching your groomsmen to the bridal party. It's a great way to run a consistent aesthetic or theme throughout your wedding. It gives a sense of unison to the wedding party and can help set the tone and personality of your wedding, reflecting your style as a couple.

If you do want to match your bridesmaids and groomsmen, there are a few ways to go about it. One option is to use complementary colours to accentuate your colour scheme. For example, you could match the groomsmen's ties, pocket squares, or socks to the bridesmaids' dresses. Alternatively, you could choose one element, such as colour, a colour pattern, or a particular print, that remains the same for both the bridesmaids and groomsmen. This gives a consistent look without being too matchy-matchy.

When it comes to the processional and recessional, the reception entrance, and wedding photos, you have a few options. You can pair up your bridesmaids and groomsmen by height, with the shortest couple walking down the aisle first and the tallest couple going last. You could also pair them by the length of friendship or role, matching the bridesmaid you've known the longest with the groomsman your partner has known the longest. Another option is to pair them by personality, matching like-minded people who will enjoy each other's company for the day.

However, if you have a bridesmaid and groomsman who are a couple, it's customary to match them up. They're already a pair, so there's no need to separate them for your wedding. The same goes for attendants who are friends—let them hang together. Ultimately, it's up to you how you want to pair up your bridesmaids and groomsmen. You can mix and match, or even have them walk alone.

It's customary to pair couples together

It is customary to pair couples together in a wedding party. This is a fairly easy task and there are several ways to do it. One option is to pair by height, with the shortest couple walking down the aisle first and the tallest going last. This creates an aesthetically pleasing look and makes for balanced photos. Another option is to pair by personality, for example, matching an extroverted bridesmaid with an outgoing groomsman.

However, it is not mandatory to pair couples together. It is your wedding, and you can choose to do what you want. Some couples prefer to mix things up and pair their wedding party based on other factors such as friendship or length of relationship with the couple. Ultimately, the decision on whether to pair couples together or not depends on personal preference and what the couple feels would be most comfortable for their wedding party.

There is also no need to worry about matching the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen. It is not essential to have an equal number on each side. If there is an uneven number, one groomsman can simply escort two bridesmaids.

Couples can be split up based on height

There are many ways to pair up bridesmaids and groomsmen, and it is becoming more common to stray away from traditional wedding roles. It is not necessary to pair bridesmaids and groomsmen by gender, and couples are increasingly choosing their wedding parties based on their relationships with these individuals.

If you do want to pair bridesmaids and groomsmen by gender, it is still not necessary to pair them up one-to-one. You can have a groomsman escort two bridesmaids, for example.

If you want to pair up your bridesmaids and groomsmen by gender and one-to-one, there are several ways to do so. You can pair them by height, with the tallest bridesmaid and the tallest groomsman together, and the shortest couples walking down the aisle first. However, couples can be split up based on height. While it may look aesthetically pleasing in photos to have couples paired by height, it is not a requirement.

Couples can also be paired by the length of their relationship with the bride and groom, with the longest friendships closest to the bride and groom in the processional. Another option is to pair couples by personality, matching like-minded people together for the day.

Couples can be split up based on length of friendship

When it comes to pairing up bridesmaids and groomsmen, there are a few different approaches you can take. One option is to pair them based on the length of their friendship with the couple. This can be a great way to honour those friends who have been by your side for the longest time and give them a special role in your big day. It can also add a meaningful touch to your wedding ceremony and showcase the important people in your life.

However, there are a few other options to consider when deciding how to pair up your bridal party. One traditional approach is to pair couples together, whether they are dating, engaged, or married. This can be a nice way to honour their relationship and let them share this special experience together. It can also make logistics easier, as you won't have to worry about breaking up couples and can create a cohesive bridal party.

Another option is to pair your bridal party by height, creating a symmetrical and aesthetically pleasing look for your ceremony and photos. This can be especially important if there is a significant height difference between your bridesmaids and groomsmen, ensuring that everyone looks well-balanced when standing together.

You could also consider pairing your bridal party by personality, matching extroverts with extroverts and introverts with introverts, for example. This can help create a comfortable dynamic within your bridal party and make it easier for them to get along and enjoy the wedding preparations and celebrations.

Ultimately, the decision on how to pair your bridesmaids and groomsmen is a personal one and there is no one-size-fits-all approach. Some couples may choose to mix and match these approaches, pairing couples together but also taking height or personality into consideration. Others may decide to ditch the traditional bridal party altogether and go for a more modern, non-gendered wedding party, choosing their attendants based on their relationships rather than their gender.

Frequently asked questions