Wedding Invitation Etiquette For Lesbian Couples: Whose Name First?

When it comes to wedding invitations, the order of names is entirely up to the couple. For same-sex weddings, there is no binding tradition, and couples can decide whose name appears first based on their personal preference. Some options include alphabetical order, age, or simply what sounds the best. Ultimately, the most important thing is to ensure the invitation reflects the couple's style and relationship.

Alphabetical order

For same-sex couples, there is no need to adhere to old-fashioned traditions and, often, no desire to do so. As such, there are two main options for how to order the names of the couple on a wedding invitation: alphabetical order or personal preference.

Ordering the names in alphabetical order is a neutral way to write the invitation, avoiding any potential arguments about whose name should come first. It also provides a clear structure that makes the invitation easily readable. For example, the couple's names would be listed as "Jeff & John", as opposed to "John & Jeff".

If you want to include middle names, this is a matter of personal preference. Middle names can add a formal tone to the invitation, but they can also be omitted for a more casual feel.

Age

When it comes to wedding invitation etiquette, there are many traditions and considerations to take into account. While some couples prefer to stick to tradition, others opt for a more modern approach that reflects their personal style and relationship dynamic.

Traditionally, the bride's name is listed first on wedding invitations, followed by the groom's full name. This custom stems from the bride's family hosting and financing the wedding. However, this tradition is not set in stone, and modern couples often have more freedom to follow their preferences.

For same-sex couples, the beauty lies in the absence of rigid traditions, allowing them to establish their own rules. There are a few options to consider when deciding whose name comes first. One approach is to list the names alphabetically, providing a structured and neutral way to order the names. Alternatively, the couple can choose the order based on what sounds best or how they are usually known by friends and family. If one family is primarily hosting and financing the wedding, their child's name may take precedence.

While the age of the couple is not a widely mentioned factor in determining the name order, it can be a consideration if the couple or families wish to incorporate it. For example, if both couples are of a similar age, they may opt for alphabetical order or personal preference. However, if there is a significant age difference, the younger person's name could be listed first to indicate a sense of respect for youth or to follow a more traditional format. Ultimately, the decision should reflect the couple's dynamic and what they feel comfortable with.

In conclusion, while age is not a prominent factor in determining name order on wedding invitations for lesbian couples, it can be one of several considerations if the couple or families wish to include it. The most important aspect is to ensure the invitation reflects the couple's style, relationship, and what they feel comfortable with.

Known couple name

For known couples, it is best to stick to the name order that people are familiar with. If your friends and family know you as "Tina and Cathy", it would be odd to switch the order of your names on your wedding invites. It is important to honour your relationship and refer to yourselves as you normally would.

If you are set on changing the order of your names, you could consider alphabetical order. This is a neutral way to write the invitation and avoids any arguments about whose name should come first.

If one family is hosting and financing most of the wedding, they may expect their child to be named first. This is a more traditional approach, but it is not a definite rule.

Ultimately, it is up to the couple to decide what works best for their personal preferences and family dynamics.

Host/financier

When it comes to wedding invitations, the host or financier is typically considered the person or people whose names should appear first. This is because they are the ones inviting the guests and paying for the event.

In a traditional wedding, the bride's parents are usually the hosts and financiers, so their names would come first on the invitation, followed by the bride's name and then the groom's full name. However, this tradition is not as common nowadays, as it is more frequent for both sets of parents to contribute financially due to rising costs. In this case, both sets of parents' names can be included at the beginning of the invitation, or a short statement can be included, such as "Together with their families, [Bride's name] and [Groom's name] invite you to celebrate their love and union."

For same-sex couples, there is no traditional order to follow, and they can choose the order of names based on their personal preference. One option is to list the names in alphabetical order, which provides a neutral and structured way to write the invitation. Another option is to go with the order in which the couple is usually known by friends and family, as it may feel odd to switch the order just for the invites. Ultimately, the most important thing is to ensure the invitation reflects the couple's style and relationship.

If one family is hosting and financing most of the wedding, it is common to list their child's name first. However, this is not a definite rule, and the couple can choose to go with whatever order they prefer. The layout of the text on the invitation and other stationery can also be considered when deciding the name order.

Personal preference

For same-sex couples, the traditional wedding invitation format is not needed and often not wanted. As such, there are two main options for listing the names of the couple: alphabetical order or personal preference.

Alphabetical order provides a clear structure to the invitation and makes it easily readable. It is also a neutral way to write the invitation, avoiding any potential arguments about whose name should come first.

However, personal preference is also a valid option. For example, if the couple is usually known by their friends and family in a certain order, it may feel odd to switch the names just for the invitations. Honouring the way the couple refers to themselves in their daily lives may be the most comfortable option.

Ultimately, the decision comes down to what feels right for the couple. There is no right or wrong answer, and it is important to remember that the invitation should reflect the couple's style and relationship.

Frequently asked questions