Big Fat Gypsy Wedding: Return Of The Travelers

The British documentary series Big Fat Gypsy Weddings first aired on Channel 4 in February 2010 as a one-off documentary called My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. It explored the lives and traditions of several British Traveller families as they prepared for a wedding. The show was criticised by the Irish Traveller and British Gypsy/Traveller communities for misrepresenting them.

The show was followed by an American spin-off, My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding, which first aired in 2012. The latest season of the American show kicked off on 3 April 2024.

Virgin Gypsy Brides

"Virgin Gypsy Brides" is the first episode of the TLC reality TV series "My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding". The episode aired on 29 April 2012 and revolves around the marriage customs of Romani-Americans, specifically focusing on the belief that there is no sex before marriage for Gypsy teenagers.

In this episode, we follow two teenage girls, Hope and Shyanne, as they navigate different rites of passage under the watchful eyes of their protective mothers. Hope's extravagant 15th birthday party is featured, along with Shyanne's wedding at the age of 17. The episode provides insight into the unique courting rituals and family dynamics within the Gypsy community.

"My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding" is a spin-off of the British Channel 4 series "Big Fat Gypsy Weddings", which first aired in 2010 as a one-off documentary and subsequently returned for two more seasons and several stand-alone specials. The American version of the series has been criticised by the Romani Gypsy community for misrepresenting their culture and cultivating racist stereotypes.

The new season of "My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding" premiered on 3 April 2024, with eight new episodes and the return of Ellen K. as the narrator. The show continues to explore the over-the-top dresses, unique courting rituals, and family drama within the American Gypsy community.

Wild weddings and ancient traditions

The return of "My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding" on TLC promises to showcase the wild dresses, unique courting rituals, and huge family drama that have become synonymous with the series. As we await the return of this reality television show, let's delve into the wild weddings and ancient traditions of the Gypsy community.

Gypsy weddings are renowned for their vibrant colours, one-of-a-kind traditions, and flamboyant attire. The bride typically dons a long skirt with a blouse made of luxurious fabrics like silk or velvet. Her outfit is often accentuated with a headdress adorned by coins and jewellery, along with an array of gold accessories, including heavy necklaces, earrings, bracelets, anklets, and rings. The groom's ensemble consists of a white shirt with embroidered sleeves, black trousers or jeans tucked into boots, a decorated waistcoat, and a brightly coloured sash. He completes the look with a wide-brimmed hat adorned with feathers or ribbons.

The wedding procession may include a horse and cart adorned with flowers, symbolising joy and abundance. This tradition is believed to bring good luck to the couple's future together. The exchange of vows is a pivotal moment, with couples reciting their promises of lifelong love and commitment. They may opt for traditional vows or pen their own unique declarations of love. Following the vows, the couple joins hands, symbolising unity and strength in their marriage.

Another significant aspect of Gypsy wedding ceremonies is the blessing of the rings. The rings are blessed by both families before being placed on the couple's fingers, signifying eternal love and devotion. This ritual also serves as a reminder that marriage unites not just two individuals but also their families, who come together in celebration and support.

Gypsy wedding receptions are filled with music and dancing. Traditional instruments like the violin or accordion set the tone for a festive celebration. Couples may also hire live bands to play a mix of traditional and modern songs to keep the party going. When it comes to dancing, guests are encouraged to join in, with traditional folk dances or contemporary moves like line dancing or swing taking centre stage.

Food plays a crucial role in Gypsy wedding receptions, with families preparing special dishes like stuffed cabbage rolls or potato pancakes. Alcoholic beverages, such as vodka shots, may also be served during dinner, bringing good luck according to certain traditions.

Gypsy weddings are a spectacle of colour, with bright hues like red, yellow, orange, green, blue, and purple commonly used in decor. Floral arrangements are also important, with brides carrying vibrant bouquets of roses, lilies, daisies, and carnations. These flowers symbolise love and joy on the special day.

The traditions of Gypsy weddings are deeply rooted, and their unique practices add adventure and mystique to the celebration. From attire and ceremonies to music and symbolism, Gypsy weddings are a memorable affair filled with ancient rituals that unite two families and celebrate the love between the couple.

Romani Gypsies and Traveller communities

The term "Romani" refers to an ethnic group of Indo-Aryan origin, who traditionally led a nomadic, itinerant lifestyle. The Romani people are believed to have originated in the Indian subcontinent, specifically the region of present-day Rajasthan, around the 10th or 12th century. They subsequently migrated westward, reaching Europe by the 13th or 14th century. While the Romani people are diverse and encompass various subgroups, they share commonalities such as a strong sense of family and community, a nomadic way of life, self-employment, and a history of disadvantage.

In the English language, Romani people have long been referred to as "Gypsies" or "Gipsies," derived from the belief that they were itinerant Egyptians. However, most Roma consider this term a racial slur and reject its use. The term "Roma" is now widely accepted and was adopted globally in 1971 when representatives of Roma communities chose a flag, anthem, and international day (April 8) to signify their identity.

Both Gypsy and Traveller communities value family and extended family bonds, with important events such as births, weddings, and funerals bringing people together. While many Irish Travellers practice Catholicism, some Gypsies and Travellers are part of a growing Christian Evangelical movement. Additionally, these communities face various disadvantages, including lower life expectancy, higher rates of infant mortality and maternal death, and challenges in attaining education.

Television shows like "Big Fat Gypsy Weddings" and its spin-offs have been criticised by members of the Romani Gypsy and Traveller communities for misrepresenting their traditions and contributing to negative stereotypes.

Over-the-top dresses and unique courting rituals

My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding and its spin-offs, My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding and Big Fat Gypsy Weddings, have become well-known for their over-the-top dresses and unique courting rituals. The shows have garnered criticism for their portrayal of the Romani community, with some arguing that they perpetuate stereotypes and do not accurately represent the community's traditions and values.

Over-the-Top Dresses

The wedding dresses featured on these shows are often characterised by their extravagance and opulence. From glow-in-the-dark gowns to dresses with feathers and crystal embellishments, the brides go all out for their special day. One dress had a skirt made of 300 yards of white sparkle organza, trimmed with a hot pink silk ribbon. Another dress, designed for a bride named Jewel, featured a lace-up corset back with lace accents, gold lamé trim, and crystal embellishments. The dresses are not limited to white, with one bride, Jett, opting for a hot pink and ivory colour scheme.

The dresses are often heavy and cumbersome, with one bride, Josie, struggling to walk in her five-stone wedding dress. The dresses are not only limited to the brides, as the bridesmaids and other wedding guests also sport elaborate and colourful outfits.

Unique Courting Rituals

The shows also offer a glimpse into the unique courting rituals of the Romani community. One notable ritual is "grabbing", where young men attempt to kiss young women without prior dates or interactions. This ritual is often met with criticism, as it involves boys "angling for a kiss" and sometimes resorting to forceful tactics, such as twisting a girl's arm. Despite this, some young women accept this as part of their culture, with one 15-year-old girl stating, "It's not nice at all, but you just got to live with it."

Another notable aspect of Romani courting rituals is the presence of chaperones. Unmarried girls are not allowed to socialise with boys alone and are always accompanied by a chaperone, even when they are engaged. This is done to protect the girl's reputation and ensure she remains "clean and decent in everyone's eyes."

In contrast to these strict courtship rules, Romani girls often wear revealing outfits, which can be jarring for those unfamiliar with their culture. Dressmaker Thelma Madine, who has worked closely with the community, commented on this juxtaposition, stating, "Their morals are so high, you would say they are definitely stuck in a time warp."

Spin-off series: Gypsy Sisters

The TLC network started airing a spin-off series called "Gypsy Sisters" in 2013, which focused on the marriage customs of Romani-Americans. The show also featured Romanichal clans and some Irish Travellers.

"Gypsy Sisters" delved into the lives of four women, showcasing their unique lifestyles and traditions. One episode revealed the life of a Romanichal gypsy housewife, as four women threw a raucous gypsy family Thanksgiving reunion. It also showed a gypsy divorcee remarrying and a young girl rebelling against the traditions.

The series also explored the dynamics of gypsy families and their complex relationships. In one episode, a teenage bride-to-be struggled to master the traditions of a secret society to gain their acceptance. In another episode, two best friends planned their double gypsy wedding, but one mother-in-law tried to stop her son from marrying outside the gypsy bloodline.

"Gypsy Sisters" also addressed the challenges faced by gypsy communities. One episode featured a gay gypsy couple who faced discrimination as they broke the rules by getting married. Another episode showcased a family that was outcast from their community and their attempt to reclaim their place in society through a christening with gypsy flare.

The spin-off series provided an in-depth look at the lives and traditions of Romani-Americans, offering viewers an insight into their unique customs and celebrations.

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