Selecting Your Best Man: Perfect Timing And Considerations

Choosing a best man for your wedding can be a daunting task. The best man is the groom's right-hand man and is responsible for supporting and assisting the groom in any way possible before and during the wedding. The best man is also in charge of the groomsmen, leading all communication and spearheading their activities and duties. So, when should you pick a best man? It's ideal to ask your best man to be by your side before the save-the-dates are sent and no later than six months before your wedding. This gives them enough time to prepare and take on the responsibilities that come with the role. When deciding on who to choose as your best man, consider someone who is capable, sociable, discreet, well-organised, and task-oriented. Pick someone who knows you well, has your best interests at heart, and can effectively lead the groomsmen crew.

Pick someone capable

Picking a best man is a crucial task, and it is essential to choose someone capable of handling the responsibilities that come with the role. Here are some reasons why picking someone capable is essential and some qualities to look for when making your decision:

The Best Man's Responsibilities

The best man has a significant role to play in the wedding process, and it is not just about getting the groom drunk the night before the wedding. The best man should be able to help the groom with various preparations and ensure that the other groomsmen are on track. This includes making sure their suits fit well, their roles are clear, and they understand wedding etiquette. Additionally, the best man can assist with pre-wedding tasks such as organising toasts for the rehearsal dinner and wedding reception, arranging transportation for the newlyweds, and ensuring the groom has the wedding license.

Well-Organised and Task-Oriented

It is crucial to choose a best man who is well-organised and capable of managing tasks efficiently. Opt for someone who has good organisational skills and can handle the logistics of the wedding. This includes booking accommodations, managing guest lists, and ensuring the groom's needs are met. Look for someone who can take the initiative and lead the groomsmen effectively.

Reliable and Trustworthy

The best man should be reliable and trustworthy. You should be able to depend on them to handle important details, such as keeping track of wedding rings and ensuring the groom's suit is in order. Choose someone who is responsible and can be trusted to step up and fulfil their duties on the wedding day.

Understanding of Your Preferences

An ideal best man should know you well and understand your preferences. They should be able to put your interests first when planning events like the bachelor party. For example, if you prefer a low-key camping trip, they should be willing to set aside their personal preferences and plan an event that aligns with your tastes.

Party-Planning Skills

While prior experience as a best man is not necessary, it is beneficial to choose someone with party-planning skills. Planning a bachelor party involves selecting a location, booking travel, and making reservations for dinner and activities. A best man with prior experience in planning events or attending bachelor parties will be better equipped to handle these responsibilities.

When choosing your best man, consider their capabilities and how well they can manage the tasks and responsibilities that come with the role. By selecting someone capable and reliable, you can ensure that your wedding process is smooth and well-organised.

Pick someone sociable

Picking a best man can be a difficult decision, but if you're looking for someone sociable, here are some things to consider.

The best man is often responsible for planning the bachelor party and other pre-wedding events, so it's important to choose someone who is comfortable socialising and can get along with a variety of people, including the groomsmen, in-laws, guests, vendors, and other event professionals. The best man should be confident and at ease interacting with others, with a natural and unforced demeanour. They should be able to schmooze and be social, while also ensuring the wedding runs smoothly and keeping guests entertained.

In addition, the best man will often give a speech, so it's important to pick someone who is articulate, confident, and discreet. You want someone who will deliver a thoughtful toast, not an inappropriate roast. It's also a good idea to choose someone who already has a relationship with the groomsmen and can effectively lead the crew. This will make it easier for them to coordinate and ensure everyone is on the same page.

Ultimately, the best man should be someone who is close to the groom and can be trusted to handle the responsibilities of the role. They should be organised, task-oriented, and capable of taking the lead on important tasks.

Pick someone discreet

Picking your best man is a big decision. The best man is the celebrity of the crew, famous for his hilarious and sometimes embarrassing speeches, and he plays a significant role in the wedding ceremony and its preparations.

One of the key duties of the best man is to deliver the Best Man Toast. This is an area where the groom will not have direct influence, unless he vets the speech beforehand, which can be a little odd. The best man should be someone discreet, who you trust to deliver a tasteful and appropriate speech. If you are worried that a candidate might say something embarrassing or tasteless, then pick someone else. You want someone who is confident and can deliver the speech in a natural and unforced manner.

The best man should also be someone who knows you well, and has been there for you for most of your life. This could be a brother, cousin, or childhood best friend. This person will likely have a good relationship with your fiancé and be aware of the kind of bachelor party to throw for you.

The best man has a lot of responsibilities, from planning the bachelor party to making sure the groomsmen have ordered their suits and keeping track of the wedding rings. He should be someone who is well-organised and trustworthy, who you can rely on to take the lead.

Pick someone you know well

When it comes to choosing your best man, it's important to pick someone who knows you well. This person should be your right-hand man at the wedding, supporting and assisting you in any way possible. Here are some reasons why choosing someone you know well is a great idea:

• A close friend or family member: Typically, the best man is a close friend or relative of the groom. They are someone who knows the groom inside out and has a good relationship with him. This could be a brother, a cousin, or a childhood best friend. They are likely to have a good relationship with your fiancé too and will be aware of the kind of bachelor party they should help plan.
• Long-lasting friendship: Choosing a friend you've known for a long time is a great option. This person has been with you through different stages of your life and can be trusted with any scenario. They have been there for you through ups and downs and are the ones who should stand by your side on your big day.
• Proximity: Selecting a friend who lives close to you is also advantageous. It becomes easier to communicate about your wedding plans and make detailed preparations. They can also provide support and advice whenever needed.
• Knowledge of your relationship: Picking someone who knows your future spouse well can make your wedding celebration even more special. During the best man's speech, they can speak genuinely about your relationship, making the toast more meaningful.
• Practical considerations: If you're torn between two friends, consider their availability and commitment to your wedding. Which of them would have the time to help with the bachelor party and wedding tasks? If one of your friends has other commitments, like a new baby or a demanding job, they might not be able to take on the responsibilities of the best man.

Remember, the best man is more than just the lead groomsman. They are your confidante, personal valet, and logistics guru. Choose someone who knows you well and has your best interests at heart.

Pick someone with party-planning skills

When it comes to choosing a best man, party-planning skills are a must. The best man will be in charge of planning the bachelor party, so you'll want to pick someone who is organised and capable. From choosing a location to booking travel and making dinner reservations, there are a lot of details that go into planning a bachelor party, and you'll want your best man to be knowledgeable and on the ball.

If you're worried about your top pick not having enough experience, don't be. A newbie will be eager and excited to take on the role. But it's still a good idea to choose someone who has planned a party or two in the past, or at least attended a bachelor party so they know what to expect.

A good best man will be a quick thinker and deadline-oriented. They'll be able to make decisions and remind the groomsmen to order their suits and make a decision on the bachelor party location. They'll also be able to keep track of the wedding rings on the big day.

Your best man will also be in charge of coordinating the groomsmen's ensembles, so they should be able to gather measurements, give an order-by deadline, and place the order themselves. They'll also be responsible for making sure the groomsmen's suits are received and tailored, so organisational skills are key.

Ultimately, your best man will be the point person and mediator between you and the rest of the crew, so choose someone who is capable, organised, and can handle the responsibility.

Frequently asked questions