Best Man's Guide: Perfect Toasts For The Big Day

Being asked to be someone's best man is a tremendous honour, but it also comes with a lot of responsibility. One of the most important duties is giving a best man's speech and toast. The best man's speech is one of the highlights of the wedding, and while it only lasts around 10 minutes, the memories of this speech will last a lifetime. This paragraph will discuss what toasts the best man should make during their speech.

Introduce yourself and explain your connection to the couple

As the best man, you'll be expected to give a speech, and part of that speech should be an introduction. Here are some ideas for how to introduce yourself and explain your connection to the couple:

"Hello everyone! For those of you who don't know me, thank you so much for coming to my wedding. [pause for laughter] Sorry about that...I'm a little nervous. I'm [Your Name], and I've known [Groom] since middle school, which means that it was before we learned mullets weren't a good look for either of us."

"Good evening, if you’re in this room and don’t know me by now, then you’re probably at the wrong wedding. I am, of course, [your name], and I’ve been best friends with [groom] for 25 years..."

"Hello and welcome to tonight’s reception. [name of groom], YOU truly are MY biggest fan. Wait, that didn’t come out right…As I was saying…"

"Hello, I’m the best man [your name]. This entire day has been beautiful so far. In fact, I’m getting emotional. The wedding cake has me in TIERS. (looking at a three-tiered cake)."

"Good evening, I am [your name], the best man and [relationship to groom] of [name of groom]. Tonight we’re in a room full of great men–doctors, lawyers, military veterans, and successful businesspeople–yet I am the 'best.' His words, not mine."

"As Abraham Lincoln once said, [say something outrageous that Lincoln obviously never said—an inspirational quote, movie line, or piece of advice] … and that’s what brings us all together tonight to celebrate [couple's name]."

"Hello and welcome, my name’s [your name], and I’m here to talk about my amazing friends Mike and Liz. They are truly a story of opposites attracting. For example, Liz’s favorite food is french fries, and Mike is allergic to potatoes. Mike has an obsession with ice cream, and Liz is lactose intolerant (pause for laughter). Thankfully, things have a way of working out, and we are gathered tonight to celebrate the most important thing they have in common…incredibly good looks. I mean, LOVE."

"Good evening ladies and gentlemen, I am Dan's younger brother, Pete. Many of you, I already know. Some, I have yet to meet. Dan and Kate, thank you so much for this amazing chance to speak on your special day … by the way, I call first dance. (crowd boos in jest) Sorry, but I called it!"

"I’ve looked up to Dan ever since I’ve had sight. He was always bigger than me, and he was always right. Being the oldest of four boys couldn’t have been an easy thing. But in a house full of hyenas, Dan was the Lion King."

"Google’s second definition of the word ‘love’ says, 'A great interest and pleasure in something or someone.' I think this is beautiful and an understatement when I think of [bride] and [groom]’s marriage. Although I was a little concerned when, under the definition, the word 'love' was used in a sentence as 'His love for football.' Hmm, strange…"

"Who’s ready to dance tonight? Wikipedia defines the word 'dance' as 'a performing art form consisting of purposefully selected sequences of human movement,' and those words have honestly never come to mind when I think of [groom] dancing. I might be kidding, but there’s only one way to find out!"

"The year was 1993, the class was kindergarten. I was building a beautiful tower of blocks when out of nowhere, they were knocked to the ground by a classmate without mercy or even an apology. That classmate was Matt, and we’ve been best friends ever since. And Matt, I’m sorry for throwing the blocks at your head after that."

"Good evening everyone, my name is [your name], and I’m the best man tonight. When coach [name] used to tell you to 'Be an Athlete,' this is what he meant. When anyone on our team missed a tackle, it was 'be an athlete,' when our jerseys weren’t tucked in, same saying. We’ve adopted that as a cure for any issues in life. When [groom] really wanted to introduce himself to [bride], the solution was simple. 'Be an athlete.' And he was. So if you see [groom] miss a step on the dance floor later, be sure to remind him to 'Be an athlete.'"

"Hello and welcome to everyone in both families on such a beautiful day. Me llamo Pedro y necesito que te diviertas porque esta boda es muy cara (wait for laughter from Spanish speakers). If you don’t speak Spanish, I said that I need everyone to have fun because this wedding is really expensive!"

Thank the previous speaker and the couple's parents

As best man, your role is to act as the master of ceremonies, ensuring the day runs smoothly and everyone has a great time. One of your key duties is to deliver a speech that is memorable, entertaining, and, most importantly, respectful. When it's your turn to speak, begin by thanking the previous speaker, perhaps with a light-hearted comment to ease any nerves. You can then go on to thank the couple's parents, recognising their role in the day and their support for the newlyweds.

Expressing gratitude to the previous speaker is a polite and thoughtful way to begin your speech. You might consider a touch of humour to lighten the mood, perhaps by gently teasing the speaker or by acknowledging any particularly memorable moments from their speech. For instance, you could thank them for their kind words and for setting an almost impossible standard for you to follow! Alternatively, keep it simple with a sincere expression of thanks for their contribution to the day's celebrations.

Turning to the couple's parents, it is customary for the best man to offer a heartfelt thanks to the couple's mothers and fathers. This is a wonderful opportunity to acknowledge the love and support that the newlyweds have received from their families. You might thank the parents for their role in raising such wonderful children, recognising the values they instilled in the couple, and perhaps even sharing a light-hearted anecdote about the couple's childhood or the lead-up to the wedding day.

If the couple has a close relationship with their parents, you could mention specific examples of their support, such as the parents' contribution to the wedding planning, any financial assistance, or their emotional support throughout the years. Recognise the parents' role in the wedding day itself, too. Thank them for their presence and participation in the celebrations, whether they played a part in the ceremony, offered wise and witty words during the speeches, or simply shared their joyous spirits with the happy couple.

In your speech, be sure to personalise your thanks to the parents. Address each set of parents individually, acknowledging their unique contributions. For example, thank the bride's parents for their warm hospitality and the groom's parents for their thoughtful gifts. If the parents have gone above and beyond, ensure you highlight their efforts. Whether they organised the rehearsal dinner, provided endless emotional support, or lent a helping hand with the wedding setup, make your thanks specific and heartfelt.

Remember to keep your comments respectful and tasteful, ensuring your speech is a wonderful tribute to the couple and their families. With a thoughtful and sincere expression of gratitude, you will undoubtedly leave a lasting impression.

Share a story or two about the groom

Sharing stories about the groom is an integral part of a best man's speech. It is a chance to shine a light on your friendship and celebrate the groom's character. Here are some tips and ideas to help you craft this section of your speech:

Choose Your Stories Wisely

Select 2-4 anecdotes that are funny but not mean-spirited. These stories should be lighthearted and not mock the groom's career or life choices. Avoid inside jokes or stories that are too esoteric. Keep the stories simple, with only two characters: the bride and the groom.

Make the Bride the Hero

Try to choose stories that subtly hint at a gap in the groom's character, a gap that is magically filled by the bride. For example, if the groom is a terrible cook, you could share a story about how he fell in love and started cooking delicious meals for the bride.

Reassure the Bride and Her Family

Share anecdotes that showcase the groom's best qualities and how the bride brings out the best in him. Reassure the bride and her family that she has made a wonderful choice and that they raised a worthy individual.

Keep it Brief

Remember that your speech should be concise, so choose only the best stories and messages to include. You only have a few minutes to capture the audience's attention, so make it count!

Compliment the couple and speak about their relationship

As the best man, your speech should be a special lens for the audience to better understand the groom and the newlyweds through your significant position in their lives. The focus should be on highlighting the couple's relationship rather than your relationship with the groom. Here are some ideas and tips for complimenting the couple and speaking about their relationship:

Introduce Yourself and Explain Your Connection

Start by introducing yourself and explaining how you know the couple. You can have fun with this part by sharing a quick joke or quoting a poem so your speech has a strong opening. For example, "Hello everyone! For those of you who don't know me, thank you so much for coming to my wedding. [pause for laughter] Sorry about that...I'm a little nervous."

Share How They Met

If you helped the couple meet, you could say something like:

> I know I said earlier I'm the best man, but I lied. I'm actually Cupid because I'm the one who introduced these two eight years ago.

Share How Their Relationship Has Grown

Share how their relationship has grown so that other guests can get a better insight into the newlyweds. You could say something like:

> I remember when they first met, and from the way he talked about [Spouse's Name], I could tell this spark was something special. You two are fantastic together. May the flame burn long, and may sparks continue to fly. Cheers to the newlyweds!

Share a Few Words About the Couple

Give a special shout-out to the couple so that they both feel welcomed and included. You could say something like:

> I'm so happy [Spouse's Name] fell in love with [Groom's Name]. Firsthand I've seen the grace, intelligence and confidence [Spouse's Name] has, which explains why [Groom's Name] knew he wanted to marry [Spouse's Name] after their first date.

Compliment Them as a Couple

Share why you think the couple is a great match. For example:

> They say you don’t marry the person you can live with, you marry the person you can’t live without. That sums up [NAME] and [NAME] perfectly. To the happy couple.

Share a Few Words About the Spouse

Even though you might have a closer relationship with the groom, don't leave out their new spouse. Talk about the qualities you like about them and why you love having them in the groom's life. For example:

> [Spouse's Name], I was hoping to be the best-looking person in the room today but obviously, I failed miserably. You look beautiful and radiant. I'm beyond happy for the two of you.

Share a Few Words About the Groom

Share some of the groom's qualities and how their spouse has impacted them. For example:

> It’s always tricky in the first stage of a relationship as you go about discovering whether it’s going to work or not. However, for Sean and Lucinda, it was a lot trickier, as soon after he met her and became smitten, he had the romantic task of making her redundant. Sean was taking the old adage “if you love them, set them free” to ridiculous conclusions, which resulted in Lucinda losing her job.

Close With a Heartfelt Toast

Close out your speech with a heartfelt toast. Ask everyone to raise a glass and provide well wishes to the newly married couple. For example:

> Everyone, please join me in raising a glass to such a wonderful couple. I wish you a lifetime of peace, love and happiness. Love you guys!

Conclude with a toast to the newlyweds

The best man's speech is one of the highlights of the wedding, and the memories of this speech will last a lifetime. It's important to get it right. The best man's speech should be a special lens for the audience to better understand the groom and the newlyweds through his significant position in their lives. The focus should be on highlighting the relationship of the newlyweds rather than the relationship between the best man and groom.

The best man should traditionally only toast the newlyweds in his speech, but it is common to also include a nod to the bridesmaids. If you are particularly close with the family of the best friend, you may want to mention them in your toast, but this is not traditional. It is important to check with the couple to ensure you are not doubling up on toasts.

The best man's toast is the ideal way to end the speech. It should be brief, snappy, and to the point, ending on a positive note that celebrates the newlyweds. Here are some examples of toasts:

> "Please join me in raising a glass to the happy couple – to [NAME] and [NAME]"

> "I’d like you all to join me in wishing the new Mr and Mr/Mrs [NAME] all the wealth, health and happiness in the world. To the newlyweds!"

> "To my best friend and his beautiful partner: the new Mr and Mrs/Mr [NAME]"

> "Here is a toast to a perfect couple – to a long life together filled with happiness, adventure and lots of wonderful memories"

> "To [NAME] and [NAME] – here is to a lifetime of love and happiness"

> "Raise your glass and join me in a toast to [NAME] and [NAME] – may you always be friends as well as lovers"

> "Time to raise our glasses to the happy couple because I like both of you - do you have any idea how rare that is?"

> “For one more time, I’m going to ask everyone to charge their glasses and – for those who still can – stand, and raise a glass to the newlyweds”

> "Raise a glass to the happy couple. May your marriage be as strong as the drinks in your hand. Cheers!"

> "To the happy couple. May your marriage be as enduring as [Groom’s Name]’s legendary hangovers, and may your life together be filled with adventure, joy, and slightly fewer tequila shots. Cheers!"

Frequently asked questions