Deborah Chan
Planning a wedding is a daunting task, and many couples choose to enlist the help of a wedding planner to make their dream day a reality. Wedding planners are expected to be miracle workers, but there are some things they won't tell you. From dealing with difficult in-laws to the hidden costs of flowers, wedding planners have a bag of tricks to ensure your big day goes off without a hitch. They can be expensive, but a good planner will work with your budget and offer valuable advice on how to save money. While they can make recommendations, it's important to remember that they might have their own preferred vendors and some may even take a cut of the profits. Wedding planners are there to ensure your day is stress-free, but it's always good to be aware of the tricks of the trade.
What You'll Learn
Your wedding planner might not be as qualified as you think
While some wedding planners are experienced and talented, anyone can claim to be part of the planning elite. There are no licenses or requirements needed to become a wedding planner. It is important to do your research and ask for multiple references, as well as review work samples and photos. The most reliable way to find a good planner is to get a personal recommendation.
Although certification is not required, it can be beneficial, as it shows that the planner has completed some training. Wedding planner certifications are offered by organisations such as the Association of Bridal Consultants, the American Association of Certified Wedding Planners, and the Association of Certified Professional Wedding Consultants.
The educational requirements for a wedding planner typically involve obtaining an associate or bachelor's degree, with common fields of study including business, communications, and social science. However, this is not mandatory, and some wedding planners learn on the job or take training courses through private schools and community colleges.
It is also worth noting that wedding planners are not always honest about their qualifications. Less scrupulous planners may inflate their qualifications to get hired, so it is important to do your due diligence when hiring a wedding planner.
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They may have a lot on their plate
Wedding planning is a tricky, detail-filled business that can be stressful for the couple getting married. Wedding planners are there to make the process easier, but they often have a lot on their plate.
Wedding planners are often working on multiple weddings at once. For example, one planner may be working on five or six weddings at the same time, each with their own unique demands and requirements. This means that they have to juggle multiple relationships with vendors, venues, and clients, all while ensuring that every wedding is planned to perfection.
On top of that, wedding planners are responsible for handling any last-minute crises that may pop up. This could include anything from a florist forgetting a bridesmaid bouquet to a caterer serving frozen cakes. They have to be quick on their feet and find solutions to problems without the couple even realizing there was an issue.
Wedding planners also have to deal with demanding clients and their families. They may have to act as a therapist and mediate family drama, all while ensuring the couple's vision for their big day is realized. It's a job that requires a range of skills, from business acumen to artistic flair, and a cool head under pressure.
Additionally, wedding planners often have to perform manual labor and other unexpected tasks. This could include anything from steaming dresses to counting dirty napkins and linens. It's a physically demanding job that requires a lot of energy and dedication.
Despite the challenges, wedding planners are committed to making every wedding perfect. They go above and beyond to ensure that the couple's vision is realized and that their big day is memorable. This may involve going to great lengths, such as walking miles to a florist to correct a $700 bouquet.
So, while wedding planners may have a lot on their plate, they are dedicated to their job and will do everything they can to ensure your wedding is flawless.
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They might think you're a Bridezilla
Planning a wedding can be stressful, and it's easy to become a bridezilla without even realizing it. Here are some signs that you might be veering into bridezilla territory, along with tips on how to avoid it:
- OCD about details: If you're fixated on minor details like the exact number of blooms in your bridal bouquet or demanding guarantees on specific measurements, take a step back and trust the experts you've hired. A little flexibility goes a long way.
- Vendors avoiding your calls: Respect your vendors' time and office hours. If you're constantly calling them, they might start avoiding your calls.
- Missing appointments: Being late or failing to show up for appointments is a sign of disrespect for your vendors' time. If you need to reschedule, call ahead and let them know.
- Micromanaging: Trust the professionals you've hired and give them the space to do their jobs. Constantly badgering them for updates will only increase your stress and theirs.
- Unrealistic expectations: Understand that your wedding vendors are real people with busy schedules and multiple clients. Respect their time and expertise by organizing your thoughts before meeting with them during reasonable working hours.
- Poor stress management: Unmanaged stress will take a toll on you and those around you. Avoid mood swings by eating regularly, staying hydrated, and avoiding anxiety triggers. Make time for fun activities and nurturing your relationship with your fiancé.
- Going beyond the budget: Stick to your wedding budget to avoid financial stress. Be proactive by setting a limit, clarifying non-negotiables, getting estimates, and regularly tracking your budget.
- Closed-mindedness: While your wedding should reflect your style, remember that your vendors are the experts. Be respectful and receptive to their suggestions and opinions.
- Demanding free labour: Your bridal party is your guest, not your personal slave. Don't expect them to do serious wedding work for free. Be mindful of their time and financial constraints.
- Raging over minor details: Things won't always go according to plan, and that's okay. Don't let a slightly off-kilter bouquet or an empty seat ruin your day. Learn to go with the flow and focus on the bigger picture.
- Treating people disrespectfully: Your friends, family, and vendors are all working hard to make your dream wedding a reality. Show them gratitude and respect, and remember that the better you treat them, the more effort they'll put into making your day special.
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They might not tell you about a mistake they've made
Wedding planners are human, and humans make mistakes. While your wedding planner will do their best to make your big day perfect, they might not tell you about a mistake they've made. This could be because they're dealing with it and don't want to stress you out, or because they're hoping you won't notice.
Some common wedding planner mistakes include forgetting to confirm the getaway car, ordering the wrong colour linens, or failing to include an important clause in a vendor contract. In some cases, it might be a bigger mistake, like a florist providing the wrong flowers or a baker showing up with a frozen cake.
If your wedding planner is smart, they'll come clean about their error and help all parties involved come to a compromise. But if they dodge responsibility or lie to you, it might be time to consider cutting ties and seeking legal advice, if necessary.
To avoid any issues, it's a good idea to ask your wedding planner about their experience handling crises and how they've dealt with mistakes in the past. It's also important to have clear and honest communication with your planner and to leave a paper trail detailing expectations and conversations.
Remember, your wedding planner wants your big day to be perfect, too, and they'll go to great lengths to make sure it is. So, while mistakes might happen, they'll do their best to fix them without you even knowing.
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They might not be able to shield you from all scammers
While a wedding planner can make your life easier, they might not be able to shield you from all scammers. Wedding planning is a tricky, detail-filled business, and sometimes, things can go wrong.
One of the most devastating schemes involves fake wedding planners who take a lot of money upfront and disappear right before the big day. These scam artists offer cheap all-in wedding packages with lots of freebies, blinding couples who want to save money and have a fabulous wedding. Most of the time, these packages are disappointingly tacky, and the worst part is that these scam artists don't show up at the wedding, leaving suppliers unpaid and the couple and guests shocked to find there is no reception.
To avoid being scammed, it is important to do your due diligence. A legitimate wedding planner will have a website, an office or location for their business, and will insist on meeting clients by appointment only. They will also be upfront about costs and not force you to pay them right away. They will also have a detailed, notarized contract with their company logo, contact number, physical address, and business registration number.
It is also important to ask for references and check reviews. A legitimate wedding planner can provide contact details of previous clients for feedback and legitimacy checks. They will also have a timeline and schedule of payments and will not ask you to deposit money into their bank accounts.
Additionally, be cautious of planners who offer a lot of freebies without extra cost, as they are most likely scammers or will not be able to meet your expectations. A legitimate wedding planner will also be able to provide receipts from their suppliers when requested.
Remember, if something seems too good to be true, it probably is.
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Frequently asked questions
Wedding planners can be expensive, and if you're working with a small budget or prefer a simple ceremony, your money might be better spent elsewhere. However, a wedding planner can save you time and stress, and they often have insider knowledge that can get you deals on venues and vendors.
This depends on the type of planner you hire. A full-service wedding planner will handle all the details up to and including the wedding, while a wedding day director simply runs the show on the day of the event. Be sure to read the contract carefully so you know exactly what services your planner is providing.
There are a few tricks to saving money when planning a wedding. One is to avoid mentioning the word "wedding" when talking to vendors, as this can often add a premium to their services. Another is to buy rather than rent certain items, such as tablecloths, plates, and silverware, as renting these items can be expensive. You can also save money by planning your wedding last minute, as booking a venue close to your desired date can save you up to 25%.
One common mistake is not reading contracts carefully before signing. It's important to know what you're getting into when it comes to deposits, cancellations, and other fees. Another mistake is not giving your vendors enough to eat or drink; it's important to keep them well-fed and hydrated so they can perform their jobs effectively. Finally, don't ship your wedding dress, as it's too important to leave to the postal service. Bring it with you on the plane instead.
To ensure your wedding day goes smoothly, it's important to designate someone as your day-of manager. This person will handle any last-minute decisions so that you can relax and enjoy your day. It's also a good idea to prep a well-stocked emergency kit with items like beauty supplies, chargers, and pain relievers. Finally, be sure to confirm with your venue that the bar is properly staffed so that your guests aren't waiting too long for drinks.
