Bridesmaids: How To Choose, Prepare, And Celebrate

Being a bridesmaid is an honour and a responsibility. The role of a bridesmaid is to support the bride and maid of honour with wedding planning and offer assistance on the day. Bridesmaids are usually the bride's closest friends and family members, and their duties include providing emotional support, helping to plan and pay for pre-wedding events, and running errands. It's important to be upfront about the time and financial commitments involved and to be consistently thankful for their efforts. Bridesmaids should also be given opportunities to get to know each other and add a touch of their own style to their outfits. Ultimately, the role of a bridesmaid is to ensure the bride feels calm, supported, and celebrated on her wedding day.

Help them get to know each other

It's important to help your bridesmaids get to know each other before the wedding weekend to lessen the chance of drama. Here are some ways to help your bridesmaids build relationships:

Set Up a Group Chat

Start a group text, email, or Facebook group for your bridesmaids to get to know each other. This will be a great place for everyone to say hi and share inside jokes, funny stories about the bride, and logistical details about the wedding. It will also be useful for planning the bridal shower and bachelorette party.

Host a Get-Together

If your bridesmaids live locally, get everyone together in person as soon as possible. Invite them over for a meal, meet for brunch, or go out for dinner and drinks. You could also do a unique activity like taking a class together, going to a winery, or doing a photo shoot. If your bridesmaids don't live locally, consider planning a weekend getaway or a sleepover so they can spend quality time together.

Share Stories

Host a get-together and share your favourite stories about each bridesmaid. This will help your bridesmaids get to know each other and feel appreciated. You can also try to find ways to connect your bridesmaids, such as by mentioning how they met, if they know someone in common, or if they have similar interests.

Create a Guesterly Book

Ask each of your bridesmaids to fill out a questionnaire and put their photo and information together in a booklet. Share this booklet with your bridal party so they can learn more about each other before the wedding.

Plan a Girls' Night Out

Set up a get-together that isn't centred around the wedding, such as a night out for dinner and drinks or a day trip to a winery. This will give your bridesmaids a chance to bond in a comfortable setting and give the bride a break from wedding planning. Encourage other topics of conversation besides the wedding so everyone has an opportunity to open up.

Give them a say in their outfit

It's your big day, but that doesn't mean you should forget about your bridesmaids' preferences. While it's customary for bridesmaids to cover the cost of their outfits, it's good etiquette to let them have a say in what they wear. Here are some tips to ensure your bridesmaids feel comfortable and confident in their chosen attire.

Involve Them in the Selection Process

Listen to their preferences and involve them in the process of choosing their dresses. While you may have a specific vision for your wedding, be open to their suggestions and feedback. This will make them feel valued and respected.

Be Mindful of Budgets

Discuss budgets privately with each bridesmaid before shopping. This will help you understand their financial limitations and make it easier to choose dresses that are affordable for everyone. If there are discrepancies in budgets, you can opt for less expensive dresses or subsidize the difference yourself.

Choose a Flexible Colour or Fabric

A great way to ensure your bridesmaids feel comfortable is to choose a colour or fabric that complements your wedding theme and let them select their own silhouettes. This gives them the freedom to choose a style that suits their body type and personal taste while still adhering to your overall vision.

Provide Clear Guidelines

While it's important to give your bridesmaids some freedom, providing clear guidelines will help them stay within the parameters of your wedding vision. Communicate your expectations for the attire, such as the desired level of formality, any specific colours or fabrics, and any other details you have in mind.

Consider Renting or Gifting

If you're concerned about the financial burden on your bridesmaids, consider renting the dresses or gifting them as a thoughtful gesture. This will not only alleviate their expenses but also ensure they feel appreciated and valued.

Remember, happy bridesmaids make for a happier wedding day! By giving them a say in their outfits, you'll foster an inclusive and positive atmosphere that will be felt throughout the entire celebration.

Ask them in a special way

Asking your friends to be your bridesmaids is a big deal. These are the women who will be helping you plan, celebrate, and say "I do". Asking your friends to be bridesmaids is a special moment for them too, so you'll need plenty of unique and creative ideas to make it truly memorable. Here are some ways to ask your friends to be your bridesmaids in a special way:

Send a Personalised Gift Box

You can fill the box with items that are personal to each friend, such as their favourite candy or a personalised note. You can also include a bridesmaid proposal card, asking them to be a part of your special day. This is a thoughtful way to show your friends how much they mean to you.

Do a DIY Balloon Pop

You can create a balloon with a message inside, such as "Will you be my bridesmaid?" Then, gift your friend the balloon—whether you add a bow and hand it to them or stick it in a box—and have your friend pop it. It’s short and sweet but still a unique way to ask. Your friends are sure to love it.

Set up a Scavenger Hunt

A scavenger hunt is a creative way to ask your friends to be your bridesmaids. You can start the day at brunch, then create clues that lead your friends to different locations nearby, with each location holding a special message or item. At the end of the scavenger hunt, you can have a proposal card asking them to be your bridesmaid. It is a fun and interactive way to ask, and your friends are sure to enjoy the adventure. It also gives the girls a chance to meet one another if they haven’t already!

Create Customised Wine Bottles

A customised wine bottle is a thoughtful and elegant way to ask your friends to be your bridesmaids. You can create a custom label for each bottle, with a message asking them to be your bridesmaid. If you’re the type to enjoy a joke or pun, look for a label with a cute phrase before the ask itself—there are plenty on Etsy! Plus your friends can enjoy the wine long after the proposal.

Personalise a Puzzle

A personalised puzzle is a great way to ask your friends to be your bridesmaids, especially if your gang enjoys a good game. You can create a custom puzzle with a picture of you and your friend, along with a message asking them to be your bridesmaid. And as an added bonus, once they’ve completed the puzzle, they can frame it if they want to keep it as a memento.

Customise Some Cookies

Customised cookies are sweet and delicious! You can have custom cookies made with a message asking them to be your bridesmaid. Most bakeries should be able to accommodate a request like this, but see if you can take a look at their work before you commit (and always double-check spelling!). They can enjoy the cookies while feeling special and loved.

Arrange for bridesmaid portraits

Bridesmaids' portraits are a great way to give back to your bridesmaids and make them feel loved and appreciated. Here are some tips to arrange for stunning bridesmaid portraits:

Timing is Key

It is important to consider the timing of the portraits to ensure a stress-free experience. Scheduling the portraits pre or post-wedding can help reduce the day-of stress for the bride and her bridesmaids. The portraits can be taken one to two months before the wedding, allowing the bride to focus on her bridal outfits and other important details.

Choose the Right Photographer

Booking a professional photographer is crucial to capturing beautiful portraits. The photographer should be able to guide the bridesmaids and make them feel comfortable in front of the camera. It is also essential to discuss the required time for the additional portraits with the photographer and create the necessary time in the wedding day schedule.

Surround Yourself with Supportive Women

The bridesmaids should be a source of support and love for the bride. It is important to choose bridesmaids who know the bride well and can offer honest opinions and handle any bridezilla moments gracefully. These women should be there to ensure the bride looks her best in the portraits and throughout the wedding day.

Let Bridesmaids Add Their Personal Touch

Allowing bridesmaids to choose certain elements of their outfit, such as their shoes or accessories, can make them feel more involved and excited about their look. The bride can provide a colour palette or length guidelines while giving the bridesmaids the freedom to choose a style that suits their unique body shape and personality.

Create Relaxing Moments

The wedding day can be hectic, so it is essential to schedule moments of rest and fun for the bridal party. This can include creating a peaceful atmosphere before the ceremony, providing drinks and snacks, or engaging in fun activities like playing board games or dancing. These moments will help the bridesmaids relax and enjoy the day, resulting in more natural and joyful portraits.

By following these tips, the bride can show her appreciation to her bridesmaids and ensure they feel valued and cherished.

Give each bridesmaid a unique gift

Giving each bridesmaid a unique gift is a thoughtful way to show your gratitude and appreciation for their support and participation in your wedding. Here are some ideas for unique gifts that will make your bridesmaids feel valued and loved:

• Personalized items: Opt for gifts like custom embroidered pajamas, monogrammed tote bags, birthstone jewellery, or custom-illustrated cards. These add a special touch and showcase your thoughtfulness.
• Individualized presents: Instead of buying everyone the same gift, consider each bridesmaid's likes and personality. Choose presents that align with their hobbies, style, or unique relationship with you. This approach demonstrates how well you know them.
• Practical gifts: Select items that your bridesmaids can use during the wedding weekend and beyond, such as a tumbler, hand cream, fragrance, or a favourite snack. Practical gifts show consideration for their comfort and convenience.
• Customized keepsakes: Gift your bridesmaids personalized necklaces, bracelets, or compact mirrors with their names, initials, or monograms. These mementos will remind them of your special day and the role they played in it.
• Relaxing treats: Assemble pampering gift sets with items like bath bombs, lip balm, or skincare products. After the wedding, your bridesmaids will appreciate some relaxation, and these treats will help them unwind and rejuvenate.
• Special experiences: Gift your bridesmaids online classes or workshops in areas of their interest, such as watercolour painting, astrology, or wine tasting. These experiences offer a unique and memorable way to show your appreciation.
• Sentimental gifts: Create a photo book or compile digital photos and videos from the wedding festivities. These gifts will evoke fond memories and serve as lasting reminders of your special bond.
• Cozy comforts: Treat your bridesmaids to cozy gifts like plush slippers, comfy robes, or soft pashmina scarves. These presents will not only keep them warm but also provide a sense of comfort and luxury.
• Beauty essentials: Assemble beauty gift sets with items like lipsticks, rollerball perfumes, or luxe hand creams. These beauty treats will come in handy for touch-ups on the wedding day and will be appreciated by your bridesmaids long after the festivities.

Frequently asked questions