The Adventures Of A Young Best Man

Being a best man is a huge honour and a big responsibility. The best man is the groom's right-hand man and is usually a close friend or relative. Traditionally, there is only one best man, but nowadays, there are no rules. It's okay to have two or more best men or none at all. The best man is in charge of the groomsmen and has several duties before, during, and after the wedding. One of the most important tasks is to give a best man's speech during the reception. In a video that has gone viral, an 11-year-old best man delivers a hilarious and confident speech at his uncle's wedding, raising the bar for best men everywhere.

Choosing and buying wedding attire

While the best man's duties are important, it's also key that he looks the part. The best man's attire will depend on a few factors, such as the type of wedding, the location, and the time of day.

The best man's outfit should complement the groom's without being too matchy or overwhelming. If the groom is wearing a white dinner jacket, the best man should opt for black. If the groom has chosen a double-breasted coat, the best man should wear a single-breasted style. The best man's attire should be a younger sibling of the groom's and should also match the groomsmen's suits, albeit with some differences.

The best man is usually in charge of supporting the groom with all his wedding attire needs, as well as helping the groomsmen with their outfits. The best man should find out what the groom is wearing and have his tailor work with that. The groom and best man typically choose their suits on the same day and from the same tailor.

If the wedding is formal, a tuxedo or morning dress is appropriate. Tuxedos should always be black, no matter the season. For weddings taking place before 6 pm, a tuxedo or morning dress is the standard choice, while tailcoats are reserved for after 6 pm. If you have free rein, a three-piece suit in a dark shade of grey or blue is a good option. For a civil wedding, you can decide on the level of formality based on the ceremony and what comes after.

The location and weather are also important considerations. For weddings in warm, exotic locations, a light and breathable fabric such as linen or a linen-cotton blend is ideal. For outdoor weddings in the evening, wool and silk in dark colours are a good choice, while morning weddings call for linen or cool wool and cotton blends.

For religious weddings, the best man's attire should be formal, traditional, and polished, with not much room for creativity.

Don't forget the accessories! While your shoes should be comfortable and matte black, you can express your originality with your socks. Instead of black or midnight blue, go for different shades and patterns like stripes, diamonds, or squares.

The best man's role is an honour and a big responsibility, but with the right attire, he will be well-equipped to support the groom and make it a day to remember.

Planning the bachelor party

Planning a bachelor party can be a daunting task, especially if you're the best man for the groom's wedding. Here are some tips to help you plan an unforgettable celebration:

Start Planning Early:

Begin planning at least three to six months in advance, especially if you're considering a destination bachelor party or have a large guest list. This will give you enough time to make all the necessary arrangements and ensure that the groom's friends and family can attend.

Consult with the Groom:

Talk to the groom about his preferences and what he envisions for his bachelor party. Discuss the dos and don'ts, and any activities that are off-limits. While you may want to incorporate some surprises, it's important to loop him in on the basic details like timing, location, and type of activities. This will make planning easier and ensure that the celebration aligns with his interests.

Finalize the Guest List:

Determine who will be invited to the bachelor party. Traditionally, the groomsmen, best man, and the groom's close male friends and family members are included. However, don't be afraid to think outside the box and invite others who are close to the groom, even if they aren't in the wedding party. Just make sure to clear the guest list with the groom before sending out any invitations.

Create a Budget:

Discuss budget expectations with the groom and the guests early on. Send out a Google form or conduct an informal group text to gauge everyone's budget and their willingness to spend on items like travel, accommodations, and activities. Remember that the groom's expenses are typically covered by the bachelor party crew, so factor that into the overall budget.

Choose a Theme or Party Style:

Decide on a theme or style for the bachelor party. Are you going for a relaxed and laid-back weekend, or something more adventurous and activity-packed? This will help you choose a location and plan appropriate activities.

Pick a Date and Location:

Select a date and location that works for the groom and the majority of the guests. The bachelor party is typically held one to three months before the wedding. Popular bachelor party destinations include Austin, Miami, Las Vegas, and Chicago. Choose a location that offers activities the group will enjoy and try to book travel and accommodations three to four months in advance.

Finalize Activities:

Book any necessary reservations or tickets for activities. This could include golf outings, pool days, comedy shows, brewery tours, or sporting events. Remember to include some downtime in the schedule as well, so guests don't feel overwhelmed.

Send Out Invitations and Confirm Attendees:

A month before the party, check in with the group to confirm attendance and get a final guest count. Share a detailed itinerary with the group, including important information such as hotel names, arrival times, and contact info. This will ensure that everyone knows what to expect and can plan accordingly.

Pack and Prepare:

If you're travelling to the bachelor party location, don't forget to pack any decorations, party favours, or supplies you'll need. It's also a good idea to arrive a little earlier than the rest of the guests to handle any last-minute setup or preparations.

Enjoy the Celebration:

As the host, your primary role during the bachelor party is to ensure that the groom and the guests are having a good time. Don't forget to join in on the fun and create lasting memories!

Follow Up After the Party:

Once the celebrations are over, send a quick thank-you note to the group, expressing your appreciation for their attendance and their contribution to the groom's special send-off. You can also use this opportunity to follow up on any missing payments or outstanding expenses.

Keeping the wedding rings safe

Being the best man at a wedding is a huge honour, but it also comes with a lot of responsibility. One of the most important duties is keeping the wedding rings safe. Here are some tips to ensure the rings are kept secure:

Before the Wedding

Firstly, it's important to understand the risks that could damage or compromise the rings. Precious metals and stones are vulnerable to scratches, chips, and other types of damage. Certain activities pose a higher risk, such as exercising, playing sports, swimming, cleaning, and gardening. It's also important to note that certain chemicals, like chlorine and bleach, can discolour or weaken the rings.

During the Wedding

On the wedding day, the best man should ensure the rings are stored safely until the ceremony. Placing the rings in a secure box or pouch can help prevent them from being misplaced or damaged. It's also crucial to avoid placing the rings near sinks, open holes, or slots, as they could accidentally fall in.

Additionally, the best man should be mindful of the ring bearer during the processional. The best man will fasten the rings to the pillow and then retrieve them for safekeeping until they are requested by the officiant.

After the Wedding

Even after the rings have been exchanged, the best man should remain vigilant. If the newlyweds are planning a grand exit with a getaway car, the best man should ensure the rings are not left behind in the excitement of the moment.

In conclusion, keeping the wedding rings safe is a critical task for the best man. By understanding the risks, being mindful during the ceremony, and staying vigilant throughout the entire wedding, the best man can ensure the rings remain secure.

Preparing a best man speech

Being chosen as the best man for a wedding is an honour that comes with great responsibility. One of your main tasks is to give a memorable speech. It's a chance to celebrate the groom, entertain the guests, and show your support for the happy couple. Here are some tips to help you prepare and deliver a great best man speech:

Start Crafting Your Speech

Begin by writing down all your thoughts, feelings, and memories about the groom. This process will help you remember specific anecdotes and experiences that you can include in your speech. Using a template as a guide is also a good idea, especially if you've never written a best man speech before. Templates can give you a sense of the structure and content that should be included.

Opening and Closing Lines

The opening and closing lines of your speech are crucial as they leave a lasting impression. Find a compelling opening that grabs the audience's attention and sets the tone. End your speech with a memorable closing that ties back to the theme of your speech and expresses your well-wishes for the couple. Consider using a quote or an inside joke that is appropriate for the occasion.

Share Stories and Personal Touches

Sharing stories and personal touches is an excellent way to connect with the audience. Recount funny, heartwarming, or embarrassing experiences that reveal the groom's personality and your relationship with him. Ask mutual friends for stories you may have forgotten, as they can provide a fresh perspective. Additionally, share what the groom means to you and why you were chosen as the best man. Talk about their positive qualities, how they've always had your back, or how they give great advice.

Practice and Delivery

Practice your speech as much as possible. Rehearse it multiple times to familiarise yourself with the content, timing, and flow. Practising in front of a mirror or with a trusted friend can help refine your delivery. Remember that the more you practice, the more confident you'll become.

On the day of the wedding, take deep breaths and visualise yourself as a confident speaker. Connect with the audience by maintaining eye contact, speaking clearly, using hand gestures, and expressing your emotions genuinely. Aim for a speech duration of 4-7 minutes, as shorter speeches are generally better received.

Address the Couple and Wish Them Well

Don't forget to talk directly to the couple and wish them a happy future together. Look at them towards the end of your speech and offer a heartfelt toast. You can be creative with the toast or simply ask everyone to raise their glasses and say, "to the couple."

Acting as a witness and signing the marriage certificate

The best man is one of the two witnesses required when the couple signs their marriage license. He should always be available for this task and should have a backup pen in case of any last-minute mishaps. The best man then signs the marriage license as a witness, along with the maid of honour, and hands the officiant a sealed envelope containing their fee. The officiant then sends the marriage license to the county clerk's office, and the couple receives their official marriage certificate.

In addition to signing the marriage certificate, the best man has several other important duties before, during, and after the wedding. These include planning the bachelor party, keeping the wedding rings safe, standing next to the groom during the ceremony, and delivering the best man's speech at the reception. The best man is also responsible for providing emotional support to the groom, assisting with suit selections, and coordinating the groomsmen's ensembles.

Frequently asked questions