Ring Bearer Pillow: Which Rings Go Where?

The ring bearer is a wedding party role typically given to young children. The child walks down the aisle carrying the wedding rings on a ring bearer pillow. The pillow is usually made of white satin and is often decorated with flowers, lace, pearls, and ribbons. However, the pillow is not a requirement, and some couples choose to use other objects such as seashells, briefcases, or dishes to hold the rings. The ring bearer can be a boy or a girl, and their age is usually between three and eight years old.

The ring bearer doesn't have to carry the real rings

The ring bearer is a wedding party role usually given to young children. The child walks down the aisle before the bride, carrying the wedding rings on a ring bearer pillow. However, the ring bearer does not have to carry the real rings.

If the ring bearer is very young, it is understandable if you are nervous about them losing the rings. In this case, you can have the ring bearer walk down the aisle with a simple ring pillow, while the best man carries the actual rings in their pocket. This way, you get the cuteness of a little boy walking down the aisle without the risks.

If the ring bearer is older, they can carry the rings on their own. However, it is still a good idea to tie the rings to the pillow or place them in a pouch to prevent them from slipping away.

If you want to ensure the rings are secure, give the ring bearer fake rings, so you aren't worried about them during the ceremony. If you do decide to trust the ring bearer with the real rings, ask your wedding planner or a member of your wedding party to hand the rings to the ring bearer right before the ceremony starts, reducing the risk of them being lost.

The ring bearer doesn't have to carry a pillow

• Antique or heirloom box: Infuse a sense of history into your big day by having your ring bearer carry the rings in an antique box. This could be a special box passed down in your family, adding a sentimental touch to your ceremony.
• Exotic seashell: For beachfront or tropical-themed weddings, an exotic seashell can be a unique alternative to the traditional ring pillow. You can use a real shell or a decorative one that matches your wedding colours. Stuffing the shell with flowers and greenery will not only look visually appealing but also provide a cushion for your rings.
• "Ring Security" Briefcase: Dress up your ring bearer as a "security guard" with a briefcase to safeguard the rings. Equip them with badges and sunglasses to complete the look. This idea adds a playful touch to your ceremony while keeping the rings secure.
• Bouquet of flowers: Instead of a pillow, your ring bearer can hold a bouquet of flowers with the wedding rings affixed to it. This option coordinates with the flower girls' bouquets and adds a colourful touch to the procession.
• Sign: Replace the traditional pillow with a sign, which can be a fun and inexpensive alternative. You can showcase your sense of humour by writing phrases like "I'm just here for the cake" or "Has anyone seen the rings?" on the sign, guaranteed to elicit laughs from your guests.
• Toy car: For younger ring bearers, a toy car can be a great alternative to keep them entertained and motivated to complete their duty. It can also double as a ring bearer gift that they can take home after the wedding.
• Glass box with a gilded frame: If you're having a glamorous garden wedding or one with flowers as a focal point, consider using a glass box with a gilded frame. Stuff the inside with blooms to elevate and protect your wedding rings while adding a touch of glamour to the ceremony.
• Piece of literature: For literary enthusiasts, consider using a hardback book as the basis of your ring bearer "pillow." You can even create a secret compartment by cutting out the centre of the book to stash the rings safely.

These are just a few creative alternatives to the traditional ring bearer pillow. Ultimately, the choice should coincide with your venue, season, aesthetic, and personal preferences while also being functional and reasonable within your budget.

The ring bearer doesn't have to be a child

While the role of ring bearer is traditionally given to young children, it doesn't have to be. If you're looking for a way to include adult friends or family members in your wedding, consider asking them to be your ring bearer. This role can also be given to your pet or even a remote-controlled car!

The ring bearer is responsible for carrying the wedding rings down the aisle during the ceremony. This is usually done on a ring bearer pillow, but other creative options can be used, such as a briefcase, a bouquet of flowers, or even a toy car for younger ring bearers.

If you're worried about the rings being lost or damaged, it's common to have the best man carry the real rings, while the ring bearer holds a pillow or box with fake rings. This is especially true if your ring bearer is very young.

The ring bearer typically walks down the aisle after the wedding party and delivers the rings to the best man or wedding officiant. If your ring bearer is too young to walk, their parents can carry them during the processional, or they can be pulled in a wagon or small car.

When choosing a ring bearer, it's important to consider their age and maturity level. While the appropriate age is usually considered to be between 2 and 8 years old, even younger children can be included with their parents' permission.

The ring bearer's outfit should be similar to the groomsmen's attire, taking into account the formality of the wedding, the venue, and the time of year. The ring bearer's parents typically pay for their outfit, but you can offer to pay if you want them to wear something more expensive.

Remember, the most important thing is to choose someone you are close to and have a good relationship with, as this will foster a comfortable dynamic leading up to and on your wedding day.

The ring bearer's pillow doesn't have to be 8x8 inches

The ring bearer pillow is a small but significant part of the wedding ceremony. It is a tradition that began in medieval times, with the original pillows being square-shaped and measuring 8 inches by 8 inches. However, there is no need to stick to this size. You can opt for a 9-inch square or a slightly smaller size depending on the age of your ring bearer.

If you want to veer away from tradition, you can choose from a variety of unique alternatives to the ring bearer pillow. These include:

• Personalized ring pillows – You can have your names or initials artistically embedded on them.
• Ring chest – Designed to avoid tying or sewing the rings to a pillow.
• Ring bearer briefcase – A personalized briefcase that looks like a special agent’s briefcase.
• Themed object – Replace the pillow with an item that matches your wedding theme, such as shells for a beach wedding or rings dangling from a horseshoe for a western-themed wedding.
• Ring box – There is a wide variety to choose from, and they can be attractively decorated and personalized.
• Ring dish – These can be customized by inscribing a message on them, and they can later be used as a jewelry holder.
• Ring holder – These come in unique shapes and sizes and are made from various materials, including ceramic.
• Pocket watch ring holder – This is a classic vintage piece designed to carry both rings safely and easily.

Other alternatives include having your pet carry the rings, using a handmade sign, or even having a wild animal as your ring bearer (although this option should be approached with caution, as one couple's owl ring bearer ended up attacking the best man!).

The ring bearer can carry the rings in a box

The ring bearer is a wedding party role usually given to young children, who walk down the aisle carrying the wedding rings. While the traditional ring bearer pillow is a popular choice, it is not required. A box is a great alternative to the pillow, and there are many options to choose from.

If you are looking for something simple, a wooden box with a burlap pillow lining or a velvet ring box with a detachable lid could be perfect. These boxes are elegant and functional, ensuring the rings are secure during the ceremony. You can also opt for a more creative option, such as a briefcase with "ring security" written on it, adding a playful touch to the proceedings. For a vintage-inspired wedding, an antique box or a second-hand object from a thrift shop can infuse a sense of history into your special day.

When choosing a ring bearer box, consider your venue, season, aesthetic, and personal preferences. You may also want to select a box that coordinates with your wedding colours or has a meaningful quote engraved on it. If you're looking for something that can be used again, a nice ring box is a great choice.

Frequently asked questions