Who Pays For Bridesmaids' Expenses And How Much?

Being a bridesmaid is a huge honour, but it's also a major financial commitment. While there are no steadfast rules dictating what expenses brides are supposed to cover for their bridesmaids, there are a few costs that brides traditionally pay for. These include bouquets, transportation to and from the wedding venue, and a gift for their bridesmaids.

Bridesmaids, on the other hand, typically cover the cost of their dress and undergarments, shoes, accessories, hair and makeup for the wedding day, the bachelorette party, an engagement gift, a wedding gift, a bridal shower contribution, a bridal shower gift, and any travel costs.

Bridesmaids' dresses, shoes and accessories

Bridesmaids' dresses, shoes, and accessories can be a tricky topic, especially when it comes to finances. While traditions and expectations vary depending on the location, here is a guide to help you navigate this aspect of wedding planning:

Bridesmaids' Dresses

In the US, it is customary for bridesmaids to pay for their own dresses, which can cost on average $143. The bride usually chooses or sets guidelines for the dresses, and it is important for her to be flexible and considerate of her bridesmaids' styles, body shapes, and budgets. If the bride has a generous budget or wants her bridesmaids to wear a specific dress, she may offer to pay for the dresses or subsidize a portion of the cost.

In the UK and Ireland, the bride or couple usually pays for the bridesmaids' dresses, especially if they are expensive or unlikely to be worn again. However, it is not uncommon for bridesmaids to pay for their own dresses, especially in modern weddings where costs are split between the couple and their families.

Bridesmaids' Shoes and Accessories

Typically, bridesmaids are expected to provide their own shoes and accessories, such as bags, jewellery, stockings, and hairpieces. If the bride wants her bridesmaids to wear specific items, it is considerate for her to pay for them. However, if the bride is giving her bridesmaids freedom to choose their own shoes and accessories, it is common for the bridesmaids to cover these costs themselves.

Communication is Key

It is essential to have open and honest communication between the bride and her bridesmaids regarding financial expectations and limitations. Being transparent about costs from the outset can help avoid misunderstandings, resentment, and tension in the lead-up to the wedding.

Hair and makeup

There is no definitive answer to the question of who pays for the bridal party's hair and makeup. It depends on the preferences and budget of the bride and the financial situation of the bridesmaids.

The Bride Pays for Hair and Makeup

The most traditional arrangement is for the bride to cover all hair and makeup costs for the bridal party. This gives the bride more control over the beauty agenda for the big day and allows for more time with the bridal party in the lead-up to the wedding. However, this option can be expensive and difficult to coordinate.

The Bridesmaids Pay for Hair and Makeup

Another option is to let bridesmaids opt in and pay for their own hair and makeup services. This approach gives bridesmaids the freedom to choose their preferred stylists and can be more cost-effective for the bride, especially if she has a large bridal party. However, it requires the bride to be flexible about the outcome, as not all bridesmaids may choose to have their hair and makeup done professionally.

The Bride and Bridesmaids Split the Cost

A possible compromise is for the bride and bridesmaids to split the cost of hair and makeup services. The bride may choose to pay for one service (hair or makeup) and give bridesmaids the option to pay for the other, or she may contribute a set amount towards each bridesmaid's beauty costs. This option can ease the financial burden on both the bride and the bridal party.

No Professional Hair and Makeup

If budget is a concern for both the bride and the bridesmaids, another option is to forego professional hair and makeup services altogether. The bridal party can choose to do their own hair and makeup or ask a talented friend to help.

Factors to Consider

When deciding who will pay for hair and makeup, it is important to consider the financial situation of both the bride and the bridesmaids. Bridesmaids may already be facing significant expenses, such as gowns, parties, travel, and gifts. Additionally, the bride should consider whether she requires a specific look that may be difficult for bridesmaids to achieve on their own. If so, it is generally expected that she will cover the cost of professional hair and makeup services.

Communication and transparency are key. The bridal party should be made aware of expectations around beauty services as early as possible to avoid any surprises or disagreements.

Bachelorette party

The bachelorette party is a fun and celebratory way for the bridal party to honour the bride ahead of her wedding day. While these pre-wedding events are an unforgettable experience, they can be expensive. The average cost of a bachelorette party is about $1,000 per person for a three-night stay, excluding flights.

Local Bachelorette Parties

For a local bachelorette party, the bridesmaids and any other guests are expected to pay for their share of the bill, plus the bride's expenses, like dinner, drinks, and other activities. The maid of honour may also offer small party favours, like hair ties, lip balm, or face masks.

Destination Bachelorette Parties

For a destination bachelorette party, it's fair to split the costs of transportation, entertainment, and lodging evenly among all attendees, including the bride. The maid of honour or bridal party typically covers decorations, drinks, snacks, or t-shirts. The bride may also contribute to lodging accommodations to alleviate the financial burden on her guests.

The responsibility of setting, managing, and tracking the budget usually falls on the maid of honour or the person tasked with planning the event. It's essential to have a conversation about the budget with all attendees in advance and to set a realistic budget that everyone is comfortable with.

Saving Money on Bachelorette Parties

To save money, consider opting for more affordable accommodations, adding budget-friendly activities to the itinerary, or choosing a unique alternative, like an at-home movie night or a group cooking class, instead of a weekend getaway.

Bridal shower

The bridal shower is a time-honored tradition intended to gift the couple with goods for their newlywed home and lifestyle. Nowadays, the event is more open-ended and collaborative, with loved ones chipping in to cover the costs.

According to standard etiquette, the bridal shower is paid for by the person hosting the event, who is usually the maid of honor. However, it is becoming increasingly common for the bridal party, mother-of-the-bride, and even the bride herself to contribute financially. The total cost of a bridal shower can range from a few hundred dollars to several thousand, depending on the number of guests and the venue.

If you're hosting a bridal shower, it's important to have a conversation with the bride beforehand to understand her expectations and preferences. This will help you plan an event that aligns with her vision and allocate your budget accordingly.

• Venue: An at-home shower may seem more affordable, but remember to factor in the costs of tables, chairs, table linens, plates, silverware, glassware, and so on. Hosting the shower at a restaurant, hotel, or event space may include food, drink, and rentals, but will likely be more expensive.
• Decorations: You can choose to DIY the decorations or hire a professional. While DIY may seem cheaper initially, it will take time and effort to source supplies and put everything together.
• Food and Drink: Food and drink are a major part of the bridal shower experience. You can prepare the food yourself, order from a restaurant, or hire a caterer. Don't forget to include drinks and decide whether you want a self-serve bar or a hired bartender.
• Favors: Bridal shower favors are optional but can be a nice touch. These can range from candles to cookies, mini bottles of champagne, or koozies.
• Gifts: Hosts of the bridal shower are still expected to purchase a gift for the guest of honor, typically ranging from $25 to $75. You may opt for a group gift to reduce costs.
• Games and Entertainment: Bridal shower games are affordable and can liven up the event. You can also hire live musicians, artists, or rent a photo booth for additional entertainment.
• Photography: Hiring a professional photographer is not necessary but can be a nice addition to help capture the memories of the day.

Remember, the key to successful bridal shower planning is open and honest communication about financial expectations and comfort levels. By delegating responsibilities and budgeting wisely, you can create a memorable and enjoyable event for the bride-to-be without breaking the bank.

Wedding gifts

While it is customary for bridesmaids to give the couple a wedding gift, it is not mandatory. Some bridal parties choose to present a larger gift from the group, while others give individual gifts. If money is tight, bridesmaids can opt for something small from the couple's registry or pool their funds to purchase a group gift. They may also decide to save up and splurge on one nice gift for the entire wedding experience.

If the bridesmaids have already spent a significant amount on other wedding-related expenses, such as the bachelorette party, bridal shower, or their attire, it is understandable if they are unable to afford a gift. In such cases, the bridesmaids should not feel pressured or guilty about not giving a gift.

It is important to note that the bride should not ask the bridesmaids if they have purchased a gift. Instead, she should make sure they know that there is no pressure to spend more, especially if they have already contributed financially to other aspects of the wedding.

Additionally, if the bride can afford it, she may consider subsidizing some of the costs incurred by the bridesmaids or giving them thoughtful and generous thank-you gifts as a token of appreciation for their hard work and financial contributions to making her wedding dreams come true.

Frequently asked questions