Big, Bold, And Beautiful: The Magic Of A Big Fat Wedding

The phrase big fat wedding is often used to describe a large, lavish, and extravagant wedding, usually with a focus on cultural traditions, rituals, and a big celebration. The term gained popularity with the release of the 2002 film My Big Fat Greek Wedding, which spawned a franchise including two sequels and a TV series. The film centres around a Greek-American woman who falls in love with a non-Greek man and the challenges she faces in getting her family to accept him, highlighting the cultural and social significance of the wedding within her community.

In other cultures, such as Indian weddings, the concept of a big fat wedding is also prevalent, with a focus on grandeur, cultural traditions, and the coming together of two families. These weddings are often preceded by a series of pre-wedding ceremonies and rituals, with meticulous attention to detail in planning, extravagant traditions, and lavish clothing.

Cultural identity and heritage

"My Big Fat Greek Wedding" is a 2002 romantic comedy film written by and starring Nia Vardalos. The film is based on Vardalos's own experiences as a Greek-American woman falling in love with a non-Greek man (actor Ian Gomez).

The film explores the importance of cultural identity and heritage through the lens of a young Greek-American woman named Fotoula "Toula" Portokalos, who falls in love with a non-Greek schoolteacher named Ian Miller. As Toula and Ian's relationship progresses, Toula struggles to come to terms with her Greek heritage and cultural identity, while also facing resistance from her traditional Greek family, who want her to marry within their culture.

Toula's father, Gus, embodies traditional Greek values and is initially furious when he discovers that Toula has been secretly dating Ian. He forbids their relationship, insisting that Toula should only date Greek men. However, Toula and Ian continue their relationship, and eventually become engaged.

To gain her family's acceptance, Ian agrees to be baptized into the Greek Orthodox Church. The Portokalos family eventually accepts Ian, but their different cultural backgrounds lead to humorous clashes during the wedding planning process, such as ugly bridesmaid dresses and misspelled names on the wedding invitations.

The film highlights the importance of cultural identity and heritage in relationships and family dynamics. Toula's journey of self-discovery and acceptance involves reconciling her Greek heritage with her life in America. She navigates the challenges of maintaining her cultural identity while also embracing her chosen partner, who comes from a different cultural background.

The film also showcases the strong sense of family and community within the Greek culture. Despite their initial resistance, Toula's family ultimately accepts Ian and embraces him as one of their own. The film's portrayal of the loud, loving, and intrusive Greek family highlights the importance Greeks place on family and their strong sense of community.

In conclusion, "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" is a heartwarming and humorous portrayal of cultural identity and heritage. Through Toula's story, the film explores the challenges and joys of navigating family expectations, cultural traditions, and personal desires. It celebrates the richness and beauty of Greek culture while also acknowledging the complexities that can arise when different cultures come together.

Pre-wedding ceremonies and rituals

The phrase "big fat wedding" may refer to the 2002 romantic comedy film "My Big Fat Greek Wedding", which stars Nia Vardalos, John Corbett, Lainie Kazan, and Michael Constantine. The film follows a young Greek-American woman who falls in love with a non-Greek man and struggles to get her family to accept him.

Hindu weddings are a sacred ceremony that unites two people and their families. The pre-wedding rituals and ceremonies last for at least four to five days until the marriage day. Here are some of the pre-wedding ceremonies and rituals:

Mangni or Nischitartham

The mangni (in northern India) or nischitartham (in southern India) is a large and celebratory event with both partners' families present. Several rituals are performed, including the exchange of vows to solidify the engagement. The wagdaan ritual is also performed, where the groom's family welcomes the bride's family into their home.

Graha Shanti

The graha shanti ceremony is intended to bring peace, prosperity, and happiness to the couple. It begins with haladi, a purification ritual that involves massaging the bride and groom with fragrant oils and halad, a mixture of turmeric, oil, and water.

Tilak or Sagan Ceremony

The Tilak ceremony is considered the first step in forming a bond between the two families. It usually takes place at the groom's residence, where the male members of the bride's family put kumkum or vermilion on his forehead. This ceremony signifies the bride's family's acceptance of the groom.

Haldi Ceremony

The Haldi ceremony is held a few days before the wedding, where a paste of haldi (turmeric) is applied to the bride and groom's body. The colour yellow is considered auspicious and is said to ward off evil.

Ganesh Puja Ceremony

The Ganesh Puja ceremony is performed a day before the wedding to bless the proceedings. Lord Ganesh is worshipped as the destroyer of obstacles and evils. The bride and her parents offer sweets and flowers to the deity.

Mehendi or Mehndi Ceremony

The Mehendi ceremony is a fun event where the hands and feet of the bride are decorated with henna. The ceremony is usually held the day before the wedding and is attended by all family members. The colour and longevity of the henna are believed to signify the depth of the groom's love.

Sangeet or Garba Ceremony

The Sangeet ceremony is a pre-wedding party where families come together to sing, dance, and celebrate. It usually takes place at the bride's home or a separate venue, depending on the number of guests.

Wedding planning

Planning a big fat wedding involves a lot of work and meticulous attention to detail. Here is a comprehensive guide to help you plan your big day and ensure it is a memorable and joyous occasion.

Pre-Wedding Ceremonies and Rituals

Before the wedding day itself, there are often a series of pre-wedding ceremonies and rituals to be aware of. These vary depending on cultural and religious backgrounds, but some examples include the engagement ceremony, known as Roka in Indian weddings, which marks the formal announcement of the union. There is also the Mehendi ceremony, where the bride has intricate henna designs applied to her hands and feet, and the Sangeet, a night filled with musical performances and dancing.

Venue and Decor

Selecting the perfect venue is crucial, especially if you are planning to accommodate a large gathering. The venue will help set the tone and ambiance for your wedding, so consider whether you want a traditional or contemporary theme. Decorations will also play a significant role in bringing your chosen theme to life.

Invitations and Stationery

Wedding invitations and stationery are a chance to reflect your personal style and chosen theme. They also provide guests with important information about the event, so be sure to include all the necessary details.

Catering and Cuisine

Cuisine is an integral part of a big fat wedding. Food plays a significant role in expressing hospitality and creating a memorable experience for your guests. Consider regional preferences and specialties, and don't be afraid to include a diverse range of delicacies. From aromatic biryanis and curries to exquisite sweets and desserts, there are many options to choose from.

Attire

The bridal and groom attire should be carefully chosen to showcase the richness of the culture being celebrated. For an Indian wedding, for example, the bride might wear a beautiful traditional lehenga or saree, embellished with intricate embroidery and stunning jewellery. The groom might opt for a grand sherwani or a tailored suit.

Rituals and Practices

The wedding day itself will be filled with rituals and practices that hold deep cultural and religious significance. Be sure to research and understand the specific rituals that are important to you and your family so that you can incorporate them into your day.

Entertainment

Music, dance, and entertainment are key parts of a big fat wedding. Consider incorporating live music bands, DJs, and dance performances to keep your guests entertained throughout the event.

Photography and Videography

Don't forget to capture the memories! Wedding photography and videography will help you preserve the emotions and joyous moments of your special day. Consider pre-wedding photo shoots and candid photography to add a touch of authenticity to your visuals.

Post-Wedding Celebrations

Even after the wedding day, the celebrations can continue with post-wedding rituals and receptions. This is a chance for family and friends to congratulate the newlyweds and celebrate their union even further.

Challenges and Modern Trends

While big fat weddings are memorable occasions, they can also come with challenges, such as budgeting and cost management. However, modern trends, such as fusion weddings and eco-friendly practices, offer new and exciting ways to celebrate love and tradition.

Wedding rituals and practices

Religious and Secular Ceremonies

The rituals performed during a wedding ceremony often depend on the couple's religious or cultural background. Religious ceremonies typically include rituals dictated by the specific religion, while secular ceremonies offer more flexibility in ritual choices.

Vow and Ring Exchange

One of the most common rituals across various wedding traditions is the exchange of vows and rings. Couples publicly declare their love and commitment to each other, often accompanied by rings symbolizing their eternal love. This ritual is found in both religious and secular weddings.

Unity Candle or Sand Ceremony

In Christian, Catholic, and other religious weddings, the couple may perform a candle-lighting ritual, symbolizing their union. A similar secular alternative is the sand-pouring ritual, where the couple pours sand from individual containers into a single vase, sometimes using sand from beaches that are special to them.

Handfasting

Handfasting is an ancient Celtic tradition where the couple's hands are bound together with a cord or ribbon, symbolizing their commitment. This ritual is where the phrase "tying the knot" originates.

Jumping the Broom

Jumping the broom is a tradition with roots in both Celtic and West African cultures. After completing their vows, the couple jumps over a broom, symbolizing a new beginning and the sweeping away of the past.

Ring-Warming

Ring-warming is an Irish tradition where the wedding rings are passed around the congregation for guests to "warm" them with their good wishes and intentions for the couple.

Tea Ceremony

The tea ceremony, or "cha dao," is a traditional Chinese ritual where the couple formally welcomes their new spouse into the family. The couple kneels and offers tea to their parents, grandparents, and extended family, who often bestow gifts and well-wishes upon them.

Lasso Ceremony

In Mexican weddings, a "lazo" or lasso made of rosary beads and flowers is draped over the couple's shoulders during their vow exchange, forming a figure eight. This symbolizes their union and their desire for an infinite marriage.

Bread Ritual

In Armenian weddings, the newlyweds balance lavash flatbread on their shoulders when entering the reception to ward off evil spirits. In other cultures, guests offer the couple a loaf of bread, symbolizing prosperity and the hope that they will never go hungry.

Breaking a Bell

In Guatemalan weddings, the groom's mother breaks a white ceramic bell filled with grains to bring prosperity to the couple.

Sawing a Log

In German weddings, the couple is presented with a large log and a saw. By working together to saw the log in half, they demonstrate their ability to overcome challenges as a team.

Tree-Planting

Tree-planting is an ancient ritual found in many cultures, symbolizing the couple's relationship taking root and flourishing. The couple plants a tree together, sometimes using soil from their family homes or home countries.

"Something Old, Something New, Something Borrowed, Something Blue"

This tradition stems from an Old English rhyme. "Something old" represents the couple's past lives, "something new" their future, "something borrowed" incorporates an item from someone happily married, and "something blue" symbolizes fidelity and love.

Wedding Veil

The tradition of wearing a wedding veil dates back to ancient Rome, where brides would disguise themselves to ward off evil spirits.

Tossing Rice

Tossing rice at the newlyweds is a long-standing tradition symbolizing fertility and prosperity. Other modern alternatives include tossing dried lavender buds, blowing bubbles, or using biodegradable confetti.

These are just a few examples of the diverse and meaningful wedding rituals and practices found around the world, each adding a unique touch to the couple's special day.

Extravagant traditions and clothing

Indian weddings are known for their extravagant traditions and lavish clothing. The bride typically wears a lehenga or a saree, adorned with intricate embroidery and stunning jewellery. The groom's attire is equally grand, with options like a sherwani or a tailored suit. The choice of clothing colours and jewellery designs holds symbolic meaning, adding depth to the aesthetic of the wedding.

Indian weddings often last several days and are filled with emotional and extravagant experiences. Families tend to spare no expense, celebrating with all they have. The celebrations include various rituals and ceremonies, such as the haldi, mehendi, sangeet, and the main wedding ceremony, each with its own significance. For instance, the haldi ceremony involves applying turmeric paste to the couple's bodies to ward off evil spirits, while the mehendi ceremony involves applying intricate henna designs to the bride's hands and feet.

The scale and grandeur of Indian weddings can be attributed to several factors. Bollywood films, with their extravagant wedding depictions, have influenced people's expectations. Weddings are also seen as an opportunity to showcase wealth and social status, making them a matter of pride. Additionally, weddings are important social events in India, bringing together family and friends, and people want to make them memorable.

The extravagance of Indian weddings extends beyond just the clothing and rituals. The venues are often luxurious, with some weddings taking place in royal palaces or exotic locations. The decorations are elaborate, with intricate floral arrangements and ornate details. The food is also a highlight, with diverse cuisines, lavish buffets, and exotic dishes.

Nigerian weddings also feature extravagant traditions and clothing. They usually consist of two ceremonies: a traditional ceremony and a "white wedding." The traditional ceremony involves the couple wearing ancestral robes or modern Afrocentric designs made from traditional fabrics. The "white wedding" follows a more Western style, with the bride in a white bridal gown and the bridal party in formal attire. Nigerian weddings are known for their colourful and creative productions, with guest lists of up to 2,000 people.

Frequently asked questions