Conquer Wedding Day Jitters: Own The Stage With Confidence

Public speaking is a nerve-wracking task for many, and giving a speech at a wedding can be especially daunting. However, with the right preparation and mindset, you can confidently take the stage and deliver a memorable speech. Here are some tips to help you stand confidently on stage during a wedding speech:

- Know your subject and your speech: Understand the purpose of your speech and what you want to convey. Practice your speech thoroughly, but don't memorise it word for word. Note cards can be helpful, but avoid reading directly from them.

- Prepare your body: Stand with a confident posture, feet shoulder-width apart. Speak from your diaphragm to project your voice clearly and avoid sounding strained. Modulate your tone, and eliminate filler words like um and like.

- Engage your audience: Make eye contact and use hand gestures to emphasise your points. Vary your voice to maintain interest and tell stories to connect with your listeners.

- Keep it short and sweet: Aim for a speech between 2-5 minutes. This is enough time to share meaningful anecdotes and well-wishes without losing your audience's attention.

- Be sincere: Speak from the heart and let your emotions guide your words. It's normal to get a little choked up, and it shows how much you care.

- Open with a joke: A light-hearted anecdote or humour can loosen up the crowd and ease your nerves. Just ensure your jokes are appropriate for all ages.

- Maintain your composure: Take slow, deep breaths before your speech to calm yourself. It's okay to have a drink to relax, but don't overdo it.

Prepare your speech in advance

Preparing your wedding speech in advance is crucial to feeling confident when you step up on stage. Here are some tips to help you prepare:

Start Early

Don't procrastinate. Start jotting down notes and ideas as soon as you know you'll be giving a speech. The more time you give yourself to prepare, the more confident you'll feel on the day. Begin gathering ideas and writing your speech a few weeks to a month before the wedding. This will give you ample time to edit, fine-tune, and memorise your speech.

Structure Your Speech

A good speech has a clear structure with a beginning, middle, and end. This will help your speech flow and ensure it doesn't feel like a jumble of disconnected anecdotes. A simple structure to follow is to think of three positive traits of the bride or groom and then recount three stories or examples that illustrate these traits.

Keep it Short and Sweet

A good rule of thumb is to keep your speech between 2-5 minutes. Anything longer, and you risk losing the attention of your audience. Focus on keeping your speech concise and engaging.

Be Yourself

You don't have to be a comedian or a professional speaker to give a great wedding speech. It's okay to be simple and meaningful. Speak from the heart, and share personal stories and anecdotes. Your genuine emotions will shine through and create a heartfelt connection with the audience.

Practice, Practice, Practice

Rehearse your speech as much as possible. Practising will help you feel more confident and ensure your delivery is smooth and polished. Practising aloud and recording yourself can also help you refine your speech and improve your body language and eye contact.

Prepare Notes or Cue Cards

While it's ideal to memorise your speech, it's also a good idea to have some notes or cue cards with you. These can be a lifesaver if you lose your place or forget what you were going to say. However, try not to read directly from your notes, as this can make it harder to maintain eye contact and engage with your audience.

By preparing your speech well in advance and following these tips, you'll be able to confidently deliver a wonderful wedding speech that the happy couple and guests will remember for years to come.

Use cue cards

Cue cards are a great way to deliver a confident and engaging speech at a wedding. Here are some tips to make the most of them:

Preparation is Key

Before you even begin to think about what to write on your cue cards, make sure you have a well-prepared speech. Practise your speech as much as possible, especially if you have a poor memory. The more you familiarise yourself with the flow of your speech, the less you will need to rely on your cue cards.

Keep it Concise

When it comes to writing your cue cards, less is more. Use keywords and short phrases that will act as triggers for you to remember what you want to say. Avoid writing out complete sentences, as this will make your cards look cluttered and be harder to read. The key is to keep things concise and well-structured.

Organise Your Content

Organise your ideas for optimal impact. Each card should have one main subject heading or idea, with supporting ideas or points listed underneath. Number your cards so you know the order they come in, and consider colour-coding different sections of your speech. This will make it easier to locate specific information while you're speaking.

Make it Legible

Use a clear, bold font that is larger than usual so that you can read it easily. Leave plenty of white space around each word or phrase to help them stand out. If you're printing your cue cards, use good quality paper that's slightly thicker than standard office paper to reduce paper shake.

Rehearse, Rehearse, Rehearse

Regular and purposeful practice with your cue cards is essential. The more familiar you become with them, the smoother and more confident your delivery will be. Make practice enjoyable by incorporating games and exercises to enhance your learning experience.

Integrate Interactive Elements

Consider adding interactive elements to your cue cards, such as questions or prompts that engage your audience and make your presentation more dynamic. This will help to create a harmonious connection between you and your listeners.

Body Language

While cue cards are a great tool, remember to maintain eye contact with your audience and use hand gestures. This will make your speech more engaging and allow your words to resonate authentically with each audience member.

By following these tips, you'll be able to confidently deliver a well-structured and engaging speech at the wedding, creating a memorable moment for the happy couple and their guests.

Practice your speech

Practising your wedding speech is a crucial step in ensuring that you feel confident when the big day comes. Here are some tips to help you prepare:

Start Planning Early

As soon as you know you'll be giving a speech, start jotting down notes and ideas. The more time you give yourself to prepare, the more confident you'll feel. Begin gathering ideas and writing your speech a few weeks to a month in advance. That way, you'll have time to edit and refine it, and you can add in any entertaining stories from wedding showers and bachelorette parties.

Practice, Practice, Practice

The more you practise your speech, the more confident you'll feel delivering it. Practise in front of a mirror, paying attention to your facial expressions, eye contact, and hand gestures. Record yourself to identify any distracting mannerisms, such as saying "um", "uh", or "like". Practise in front of a trusted friend or family member to get a second opinion and helpful feedback. The more you practise, the more comfortable and confident you'll feel.

Time Your Speech

Keep your speech concise and to the point. A good rule of thumb is to aim for between two and five minutes. Any longer, and you risk losing your audience's attention. Time yourself while practising to ensure you stay within this timeframe.

Know Your Speech, But Don't Memorise

While it's important to know your speech well, avoid memorising it word-for-word. Instead, focus on memorising the key points you want to make and the order in which you want to make them. That way, you can make eye contact with your audience and deliver your speech in a natural, conversational tone.

Print Out Your Speech

While it may be tempting to read your speech off your phone, it's best to print it out. Reading off a phone can be distracting for your audience due to notifications and backlighting. Print your speech in a large, legible font with wide spacing, so you can easily find your place.

Stay Calm and Centre Yourself

Before delivering your speech, find a quiet place to centre yourself. Take a few deep breaths and remind yourself that the speech isn't about you—it's about the couple. Reframe your nerves and focus on sharing a unique, authentic message.

Avoid Excessive Alcohol

While a drink or two may help calm your nerves, avoid overindulging before your speech. Alcohol can affect your speech and coherence, and you don't want to risk seeming sloppy or disrespectful.

By following these tips and practising your speech, you'll be well on your way to delivering a confident and engaging wedding speech that the couple and their guests will appreciate.

Know your audience

Knowing your audience is key to giving a successful speech or presentation. Here are some tips to help you get to know your audience:

Research in advance

Speak to the organiser or sponsor of the event to find out more about the audience's expectations and demographics, such as age, background, and gender. If it's an industry event, research the event website and familiarise yourself with its mission and typical attendees. If you're presenting to a corporation, visit their website, read news reports, and review their blogs.

Be familiar with the room layout

If possible, visit the location of the talk beforehand to see how the room will be laid out and to make any requests for positioning visual aid equipment. Knowing the size of the room will give you an idea of how energetic and physical you need to be to engage the audience.

Greet your audience at the door

If you can't find out much about the audience in advance, improvise and adjust your talk based on the information you collect at the beginning of the event. Greet people at the door, ask questions, and ascertain their level of knowledge and expectations.

Use the Call and Response technique

Frame questions at the beginning of your talk to learn about the audience. Find out how much experience they have with the topic and adjust your speech accordingly. This technique will also help you gauge the mood of the audience.

Understand why your topic matters to them

To connect with your audience, you need to understand why your topic is important to them. What do they expect to learn from your presentation? Don't assume the audience is like you—they may have cultural or geographic biases, and understanding these will help you express your ideas and avoid gaffes.

Understand their level of knowledge about the topic

Know how much your audience knows about the topic so you can present the information with the correct tone and keep them engaged. You don't want to present basic information to a highly knowledgeable audience, or speak at too high a level for novices.

Understand their cultural differences

If you're presenting in a foreign country, it's important to understand the cultural differences of the audience. How do they dress? How is their sense of humour? How do they typically communicate? Are there any religious factors that should be considered?

Keep it short and sweet

The ideal length for a wedding speech is three to five minutes, with five minutes being the absolute maximum. Short wedding speeches are not only the best, they are easy to deliver. Here are some tips to keep your speech concise and meaningful:

Focus on a Few Key Points

Select one to three aspects of the newlyweds that you love and appreciate, along with no more than three short stories to illustrate each of these points. This will keep your message focused and ensure you end on a positive note.

Structure Your Speech

Structure your speech in a way that focuses on the bride and groom. Find one, two, or three points about them that you can elaborate on and share stories in which they are the hero.

Avoid Alcohol

While it may be tempting to have a drink to calm your nerves, it is best to lay off the alcohol until after your speech. Alcohol could turn your short speech into something long and nonsensical.

Use Note Cards

Have a couple of note cards handy to glance at from time to time to help you remember your lines and keep you on track. The audience likely won't even notice, and your speech will be better for it.

Record Yourself Practicing

Use your phone to record yourself practicing your speech. This will help you identify any distracting mannerisms, such as verbal pauses like "um," "uh," and "like."

Keep it Light and Positive

Your job is to keep things light—tell an anecdote, make an emotional connection, and then wish the couple well. Anything that doesn't feel definitively positive should be avoided.

Example Short and Sweet Wedding Speech

"Hello, everyone! Thank you for celebrating this special day with us. A big thanks to our parents for making today possible. Today is beyond special, and we're overflowing with gratitude. To my love, you've been my rock and best friend. Thank you for accepting me, flaws and all. I promise to be there for you always and to love you forever. Cheers to a lifetime of love and joy together!"

Frequently asked questions