Post-Vow Bliss: What Comes After 'I Do'?

After the wedding vows, the officiant will usually pronounce the couple as newlyweds and married. The couple then shares their first kiss as a married couple. Some couples also opt to have a unity ceremony after the first kiss, such as lighting a candle or mixing sand or water to symbolise their union. The officiant will then end the ceremony with some closing remarks and congratulations for the couple. The couple then exits the ceremony venue, followed by the wedding party and the guests.

The officiant's opening remarks

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to celebrate the union of [name] and [name] in matrimony.

Marriage is a sacred bond, a special journey that [name] and [name] are about to embark upon together. It is a symbol of their love, a testament to their commitment, and a celebration of their future as a married couple.

We are here to witness their vows, the promises they will make to each other, and to offer our blessings as they begin this new chapter of their lives.

Today, we honour the love between [name] and [name], a love that has brought us all together. Their journey as a couple has been an inspiration to us, and we are privileged to be a part of this special day.

[Name] and [name], your wedding day is a celebration of the love and joy that you have found in each other. It is a day to cherish the memories of your past, the dreams of your future, and the love that will always be present in your hearts.

As you stand here today, surrounded by your family and friends, you are about to declare your love and commitment to one another. Your vows will be a reflection of the unique and special bond that you share.

May your love continue to grow and flourish, and may your marriage be filled with happiness, joy, and all the blessings that life has to offer.

Let us now proceed with the ceremony and join [name] and [name] in the celebration of their love.

The couple's vows

The wedding ceremony is a joyous occasion and the couple's vows are a crucial part of it. Here are some ideas and suggestions for the couple's vows:

• Personal Stories and Reflections: Begin by sharing a story or reflection about your relationship. You can talk about how you met, a memorable moment you shared, or the qualities you admire in your partner. This adds a personal touch and helps guests understand your unique love story.
• Expressions of Love and Commitment: Directly express your love for your partner and your commitment to the relationship. You can say something like, "I love you with all my heart and promise to be by your side through thick and thin."
• Promises and Vows: Make specific promises that hold special meaning for both of you. These could include vows such as "I promise to support your dreams and aspirations," "I vow to always be honest and faithful," or "I will respect and honour you for who you are."
• Future Aspirations: Talk about your shared future and the life you hope to build together. For example, "I can't wait to build a home and family with you, filled with love and laughter."
• Symbolic Gestures: Include symbolic gestures or rituals as part of your vows. For instance, you could exchange rings while saying, "With this ring, I give you my heart and promise to love and cherish you always."
• Incorporating Family: If you have children, you can include them in your vows by saying something like, "I promise to love and support not only you but also the beautiful family we have created together."
• Humour and Light-hearted Moments: It's okay to include a touch of humour or light-heartedness in your vows. It adds personality and makes the moment more enjoyable. Just be sure to strike a balance between humour and sincerity.
• Direct Address: Speak directly to your partner, using their name and looking into their eyes. This makes the vows more intimate and heartfelt.
• Memorable Phrases: Include memorable phrases or quotes that hold special meaning for both of you. It could be something from your favourite poem, song, or even a private joke between the two of you.
• Keep it Balanced: Try to keep your vows balanced in terms of length and content. You don't want one person's vows to be significantly longer or more detailed than the other's. Discuss beforehand to ensure you are both on the same page.

Remember, there is no one-size-fits-all approach to writing wedding vows. The most important thing is to speak from the heart and create vows that truly reflect your relationship. Whether you choose to be traditional, creative, or a mix of both, your vows will be a beautiful expression of your love.

The ring exchange

• "I give you this ring as a symbol of my everlasting love for you."
• "I give you this ring as a sign of our love for and commitment to each other. I promise to support you, care for you, and stand alongside you for all of our days."
• "I offer you this ring to wear as a symbol of our unbreakable bond. It is a reminder of my eternal faith and unwavering dedication. I will cherish you forever more."
• "The fitting of this ring with its unending circle symbolizes my everlasting love for you. The placing of this ring on your finger, is the fulfillment of my dreams, to have you as my friend, my love, my husband/ wife, to live as one forever.
• With this ring, I give you my heart… From this day forward, You shall not walk alone. My heart will be your shelter, And my arms will be your home.”
• "I give you this ring as a symbol of my love for you. Let it be a reminder that I am always by your side and that I will always be a faithful partner to you."
• "With this ring, I thee wed. As a symbol of my love and commitment, I give you this ring, a circle unbroken, a token of my everlasting trust and devotion."
• "I give you this ring as a sign of my love, and with all that I have, I honour you and take you for my husband/wife."
• "With this ring, I marry you and bind my life to yours. It is a symbol of my eternal love, my everlasting friendship, and the promise of all my tomorrows."

The pronouncement of marriage

The exact wording of the pronouncement may vary depending on the couple's preferences, the type of ceremony, and the officiant's style. Some officiants may say, "I now pronounce you husband and wife," or "I now pronounce you married," or use other creative and personalised phrasing to announce the couple's new marital status.

After the pronouncement, the officiant will usually instruct the couple to seal their marriage with a kiss, often saying, "You may now kiss the bride," or a more modern variation such as, "You may now kiss each other." This is a joyful and memorable moment, often captured by the wedding photographer, and followed by applause and cheers from the guests.

The first kiss

In ancient Rome, the wedding kiss was a legal formality, symbolising the transaction of a contract. As most people were illiterate, a kiss was used to seal an agreement, hence the expression "to seal with a kiss". The wedding ceremony was also considered the first time the couple kissed.

In ancient Catholic ceremonies, priests would give the groom a "kiss of peace", which would then be passed on to the bride. This is said to be the origin of the phrase "you may now kiss the bride".

Another religious origin story comes from the Bible, where the kiss symbolises the fulfilment of the scripture: "and the two shall become one flesh" (Mark 10:8).

The wedding kiss is a representation of love and devotion between the couple. It is a magical moment and a must-have wedding photo. Some grooms choose to dip or lift their bride as they kiss, adding a dramatic flair to the embrace.

While the kiss is an expected part of the ceremony, it is not compulsory. It is important to remember that your wedding is still valid without it, and you should not feel pressured to perform any public displays of affection that make you uncomfortable.

Whether you choose to include the kiss or not, the moment you are pronounced a married couple is sure to be unforgettable.

Frequently asked questions