Wedding Invitation Etiquette: What To Include And Send

A wedding invitation suite refers to the components of the wedding invitation itself, including everything that goes in the envelope. This typically includes the invitation, an RSVP card, an RSVP envelope, a stamp, and an outer envelope.

Other traditional elements that can be included are a details card, an inner envelope, a reception card, a directions card, a weekend events card, an accommodations card, and an invitation wrapper.

Host names and invitees

The host line is the opening line on a wedding invitation and names the hosts of the event. If multiple parties are hosting, you only need to include names if you're going for a formal feel. If you're hosting the wedding yourselves, this line can be omitted.

Traditionally, the bride's parents are the hosts and are named at the top of the invitation. However, including the names of both sets of parents as hosts is a gracious option, no matter who is paying. More and more couples are now hosting their own weddings, or doing so together with their parents.

If the couple is hosting with their parents, you can use wording such as:

> "Together with their parents, Emma and Jax request the pleasure of your company..."

If you want to include the name of a deceased parent, you can rearrange the invitation to say:

> "Julia French, daughter of Mr. Adam French and the late Iris French, and Austin Mahoney, son of Mr. Camden and Elizabeth Mahoney, request the honour of your presence at their wedding on the fifth of May, two thousand and seventeen at one o'clock in the afternoon..."

If the couple's parents are divorced and you want to include both as hosts, you can include them all, keeping each parent on a separate line. If you're including a stepparent, keep their name on the same line as their partner. Here's an example:

> "Dr. Vance and Elizabeth Gregory and Mr. James Abner and Lydia Abner and Mr. Harold and Jane Hyland invite you to the wedding of their children Amy Abner and Charles Hyland 01.06.18 | 4 p.m. Our Lady Queen of Angels Catholic Church Newport, California Reception immediately after"

If the couple is hosting the wedding themselves, you can skip the host line altogether or start with a warm and welcoming introduction, such as:

> "Together with full hearts"

> "With hearts full of love and joy"

The host line is usually followed by the request line, such as "request the pleasure of your company", "invite you to celebrate with them", or "request the honour of your presence" if the ceremony is taking place in a place of worship.

Date, time and location

The date, time and location of the wedding are essential details to include in the invitation. Traditionally, the date and time should be written out in full, with the time of day specified, for example, "half after four o'clock in the afternoon". The day of the week and month should be capitalised, and the year should be in lowercase.

The venue's name and full address, including the city, state, and zip code, should also be included. If the wedding is taking place abroad, the country should be mentioned as well. If the reception is at the same location, a simple "Reception to follow" or "Dinner and dancing to follow" can be added. If the reception is elsewhere, its details can be included on a separate card.

For destination weddings, it is helpful to give guests plenty of time to plan by sending out save-the-date cards with recommended travel information and providing additional print information to navigate foreign destinations.

RSVP details

RSVP cards are a must when it comes to wedding invitation suites. This is how you will confirm your final headcount with your venue and caterer. Here are some key details to include on your RSVP card:

• RSVP date: The first piece of information on the card is the reply-by date, which is typically three to four weeks before the wedding.
• Wording: Keep the wording consistent with the invitation. For example, "the favour of a reply" matches the invitation wording "the honour of your presence."
• Guest names: Include a line for guests to write their names, along with checkboxes for accepting or declining the invitation.
• M line: Most traditional weddings use the "M" line to indicate where guests will write their names. For less formal celebrations, use "Name(s)" instead.
• Additional information: You can include meal choices, along with checkboxes, and a song-request line.

If you are collecting RSVPs online via your wedding website, it is still considerate to include a paper RSVP card for guests who prefer not to respond online. You can include your wedding website URL on a separate reception card or an additional information card.

Additional RSVP Details

If you are having meal choices, put checkboxes on the response cards for people to choose chicken, fish, steak, vegetarian options, etc.

Number the names on your guest list, and then write that number on the back of the corresponding response card. That way, you can easily look up responses if someone forgets to include their name or their handwriting is illegible.

If you are hosting a destination wedding or inviting guests from another country, provide an alternate/online reply method.

Dress code

When it comes to dress code, there are a few different ways to approach this. Firstly, you can include this information on the wedding invitation itself, in the lower corner or bottom centre of the invite. Alternatively, you can use a separate details card or your wedding website to communicate the dress code to your guests.

If you are having a formal wedding, the dress code is usually implied by the tone and style of the invitation. For example, a very fancy invitation will likely indicate a formal, black-tie affair, whereas a simpler invitation suggests a more casual dress code.

If you are explicitly stating the dress code, here are some examples of wording you could use:

• Black-tie (tuxedos and floor-length gowns)
• Formal attire (suits and dresses)
• Cocktail attire (suits or dress shirts with ties and cocktail dresses)
• Beach casual (long- or short-sleeve shirts with pants or shorts, sundresses, and sandals)
• Casual attire
• Dressy casual attire
• Semi-formal attire
• Black-tie optional
• White tie

Additional information

There are several optional additions to your wedding invitation suite that will help you cover all the information to include in a wedding invitation. These are some ideas for extra cards to include in your invitation suite, or details to add to your wedding website.

Reception Card

If your wedding reception is at a different location from the ceremony, include a separate card with the reception information. If your reception is before 1 pm, the first line should be "Breakfast Reception." If it's after 1 pm, simply put "Reception." If you want to indicate a sit-down meal, the first line should be "Dinner Reception."

Directions

It's a good idea to include a separate direction card, as guests' phones might die or lose reception, or they might not have a smartphone. Make sure the font is easy to read, and include the directions on your wedding website as a backup. You could also include a custom map of the area, showing the locations of the ceremony and reception, or a list of things for guests to do.

Weekend Events Card

If your wedding will span a whole weekend, include a full itinerary so guests know what to expect and pack for. Include hotel recommendations and room blocks, transportation locations and times, and mention any adults-only events.

Accommodations Card

If you have guests coming in from out of town, they will appreciate a separate card with hotel options and any information regarding transportation to and from the hotels. It's also helpful to include a deadline for making reservations.

Invitation Wrapper

Once you've assembled your invitation suite, you might want to use an invitation wrapper, like a belly band or silk ribbon, to hold all the pieces together. You can choose a coordinating colour and add a jewel or botanicals for extra glamour.

Destination Weddings

If you're hosting a destination wedding, give guests plenty of time for planning by sending save-the-date cards with recommended travel information well in advance. It's also helpful to include additional print information for navigating foreign destinations.

Frequently asked questions