Wedding Invite Etiquette: Understanding 'Presentation Only

The phrase presentation only on a wedding invitation is a way for the couple to indicate that they would prefer money as a gift instead of physical presents. This is a somewhat controversial practice, as some people consider it rude or improper to request gifts on a wedding invitation. However, others argue that specifying preferences is helpful for guests.

'Presentation Preferred' means no gifts, cash only

"Presentation Preferred" on a wedding invitation is a way of asking for money instead of gifts. This is a well-known tradition in Winnipeg, Manitoba, and is often stated on the lower right-hand corner of the invitation. While some people may find this practice acceptable, others may consider it improper and rude.

If you are set on asking for cash only, there are a few ways to word your invitation without being too direct. Here are some suggestions:

• You can include a poem or a small note as an insert in your invitation, stating that their presence is the greatest gift, but if they wish to give more, you would appreciate contributions towards your new home or honeymoon.
• You could also mention that you are saving up for a specific goal, such as renovations or a honeymoon, and that monetary gifts would be appreciated.
• Another option is to simply not include any information about gifts or cash on the invitation. In some regions, such as Ontario, it is common for guests to give money, and gifts are usually given at bridal showers.
• If you have a wedding website, you can explain why you prefer monetary gifts or create a cash fund or gift card registry.
• You could also include a registry with a few selected items, hoping that they will be bought for the bridal shower, and guests will give money at the wedding.

Remember, it is generally considered improper to request specific gifts or cash on a wedding invitation. If you choose to do so, be mindful of your guests' comfort and try to word your request politely and tastefully.

It's considered rude to ask for money on an invite

"Presentation only" or "presentation preferred" on a wedding invitation is a subtle way of asking for money as a gift. However, it is generally considered rude to ask for money on a wedding invitation.

It May Come Across as Greedy

Wedding gifts are not mandatory, and putting gift information on the invitation can give a greedy impression. Instead, provide a wedding website link or insert card with your invitation, which will guide guests to your registry or wedding website where they can find more information about gift preferences.

It May Offend Guests

Guests may want to freely choose the type of gift they give, and they might find it rude if the couple expresses a preference for one type of gift over another. While couples may have valid reasons for preferring cash, such as already having homeware items or limited space, it is still important to consider the guests' perspectives and provide them with options.

It May Reward Bad Behaviour

Some sources suggest that asking for money on a wedding invitation is not proper etiquette and that guests should disregard such requests and give gifts as they wish. It is generally considered more respectful to send gifts to the couple's home before the wedding or give them at the wedding reception.

It May Create an Awkward Situation

Asking for money directly on the invitation can put guests in an uncomfortable position, especially if they are unable or unwilling to give monetary gifts. Instead, the couple can use more subtle approaches, such as creating a cash fund registry or having family and friends spread the word about their preference for monetary gifts.

It May Contradict Traditional Etiquette

According to etiquette expert Mariah Grumet, monetary gifts (or any specific gift requests) should not be mentioned on the wedding invitation. Instead, she recommends including an insert card with the invitation that provides the address of the wedding website, where guests can find details about the couple's registry preferences.

In conclusion, while it is not inherently rude to ask for money as a wedding gift, doing so directly on the invitation is generally considered impolite. Couples should consider alternative ways to communicate their preference for monetary gifts while being mindful of their guests' comfort and following accepted etiquette guidelines.

It's a regional thing

The phrase "presentation only" on a wedding invitation is a regional thing. In some places, it is considered rude to put anything about gifts on a wedding invitation. However, in other places, it is common to give money instead of gifts, and this is accepted and expected.

For example, in Ontario, it is common for wedding guests to give money instead of gifts. This is also the case in British Columbia, where guests usually give monetary gifts for the couple's honeymoon. In Alberta, a similar trend is observed, with couples often requesting money for home renovations or creating a small registry.

In Manitoba, the phrase "presentation" on a wedding invitation is recognised across class, linguistic, and ethnocultural boundaries. It signifies that the couple prefers cash gifts over material objects. This preference is usually stated on the lower right-hand corner of the invitation. While some people may find this practice controversial or tacky, it is a well-known tradition in Winnipeg, Manitoba.

It is worth noting that wedding gift preferences can vary greatly depending on the region and cultural background of the couple. What may be considered rude in one area might be completely acceptable in another. Therefore, it is always a good idea to consider the context and ask for clarification if needed.

A separate poem or card can be included to ask for money

The phrase "presentation only" on a wedding invitation is a way of asking for money instead of gifts. This is a somewhat controversial practice, as some people believe that any type of gift request on an invitation is unacceptable.

If you would like to ask for money as a wedding gift, a separate poem or card included with the invitation can be a more tasteful way to do so. Here are some ideas for what you could include:

"Your presence at our wedding is a gift in itself, but if you wish to honour us with a gift, we would be incredibly grateful for a monetary contribution towards our first home together."

"We are so lucky to already have everything we need to start our life together. However, if you are thinking of giving us a gift, we would be most grateful for a contribution to our future."

"We are saving up for [specific goal, e.g. a honeymoon, a new home, etc.], so if you were thinking of giving us a gift, we would be very appreciative of a monetary contribution towards this instead."

"While your presence at our wedding is the greatest gift we could ask for, if you would like to give something more, we would be truly thankful for a contribution to our future plans/new home/honeymoon etc."

"We are so excited to start our married life together, and we are currently saving up for [specific goal]. If you were thinking of giving us a gift, we would be very grateful for a contribution towards this instead."

No boxed gifts

"No boxed gifts" is a phrase that is commonly used in Pakistani and Indian cultures. It is considered normal in these cultures to give money as a wedding gift, as it is seen as a way to set the couple up for their future together. This money could go towards a down payment on a home, or simply help them get started with married life. Close family members may also give gold jewellery as a gift.

In Pakistani and Indian cultures, wedding gifts are not usually items for the home, but rather things to help the couple get their home started. It is also common for couples to already have the household items they need, as many live together before getting married.

Some people may consider it rude to mention gifts on a wedding invitation, and it is generally considered improper to request gifts or money directly. However, this phrase is often included on invitations to weddings in these cultures, and it is usually worded politely, such as "we kindly request no boxed gifts".

Including this phrase on a wedding invitation can be a way to politely indicate a preference for monetary gifts, without directly asking for money. It is also a way to avoid receiving multiple boxed gifts, which may not be needed or wanted by the couple.

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