The Wedding Invitation Conundrum: To Envelope Or Not?

Wedding invitation envelopes have traditionally been comprised of an inner and outer envelope. The outer envelope contains the guest's address, and the inner envelope states who is invited to the event. This practice dates back to the days of horse-drawn carriages and hand-delivered mail when the outer envelope would protect the inner envelope from getting dirty or damaged. Today, the double envelope is considered more traditional and formal, and it gives your guests a more upscale experience. It also helps to clarify who is invited to the wedding, especially when inviting families with children or allowing plus ones. However, some couples choose to forgo the inner envelope to save costs, time, or paper. Ultimately, it is up to the couple whether they want to include an inner envelope or not.

Inner and outer envelopes: pros, cons, and traditions

The tradition of using two envelopes for wedding invitations dates back to the days of horse-drawn carriages when mail would often arrive damaged or dirty. The outer envelope was used to protect the inner envelope, which contained the invitation, from the elements.

Pros

Today, the outer envelope still serves a practical purpose: it can protect your invitation from getting bent, torn, or dirty in the mail. Using two envelopes can also help to clarify who is invited to the wedding, especially if you have a lot of guests with children. The outer envelope is usually addressed only to the heads of the household, while the inner envelope lists the names of everyone invited, including any additional family members. This can help to avoid confusion and ensure that your guests understand your wedding is adults-only, if that's the case.

Cons

Some may see the use of two envelopes as unnecessary and a waste of paper. It can also be more expensive and time-consuming to use two envelopes, especially if you are addressing them by hand or hiring a calligrapher.

Traditions

The outer envelope is usually more formal and includes the recipient's full name and title (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Mx.). The inner envelope is more informal and includes the names of those invited, without the need for titles. Traditionally, the inner envelope is left unsealed and placed inside the outer envelope with the guest's name facing out.

The role of the inner envelope in clarifying who is invited

The inner envelope is a great way to clarify who is invited to your wedding. While the outer envelope is addressed to the heads of the household, the inner envelope lists the names of every person invited to the wedding, such as older teenagers in the family, for an adults-only wedding. This can be especially useful if you are inviting certain family members but not their children, or if you are inviting unmarried couples who live together.

The use of inner envelopes dates back to the days of horse and carriage when mail would often arrive damaged. The inner envelope was a way to ensure the invitation remained clean and undamaged. Today, it can still be useful to have that extra layer of protection for your invites, ensuring they arrive without rips or smudges.

The inner envelope is also a chance to address your guests in a more informal way. It can be a nice touch to have their names written out in full, perhaps with their preferred titles, and this can be a more personal approach than simply addressing the outer envelope to "The [Family Name] Family".

While the use of inner envelopes is by no means essential, it can be a good way to ensure your guests are clear on who is invited and to add a little extra protection for your invitations.

How to address inner and outer envelopes

Wedding invitations can include an inner and outer envelope, but an inner envelope is not necessary. The outer envelope is stamped and addressed, while the inner envelope only includes the names of the invitees and contains the invitation inside.

Outer Envelope

The outer envelope is more formal and traditionally includes the recipient's full name(s) and title(s). For example, for a married couple with the same last name, you would write:

> Mr. and Mrs. Jackson Clarke

Or, for a married couple with different last names:

> Mrs. Gwyneth Brookes and Mr. Cyan Matthews

If you are unsure about a guest's title, it is best to forgo it and use their first and last name. You can also use "Mx." for non-binary guests.

Inner Envelope

The inner envelope is more informal and may include titles and last names or just first names. For example, if you addressed the outer envelope to the parents, you could include their children's names on the inner envelope:

> Mr. and Mrs. Michael Abraham

> Daniel, Jeffrey, Miss Brittany and Mx. Kelly

If you are only using an outer envelope, be sure to list all invited parties, including plus-ones and children.

How to assemble the invitation suite

The process of assembling your wedding invitation suite is less complicated than it seems. Here is a step-by-step guide on how to do it:

Step 1: Create an assembly line

Clear off a table and give it a good wipe down. You don't want to smudge your invitations or have them get stained. Then, lay out all the necessary pieces in neat piles. This includes the invitation itself, any enclosure cards and additional envelopes, and adornments like belly bands, vellum or tissue paper overlays, ribbons, and wax seals.

Step 2: Start with the invitation

It's important to start with the wedding invitation, which you should place face up on the table. Generally speaking, this is the largest card in the invitation suite, so it makes sense that all additional pieces will be built upon it.

Step 3: Layer on your tissue paper or vellum overlay

If a sheet of tissue paper came on top of each invitation, it's your choice whether to include it or not. This was traditionally used to keep the ink from smudging, but most inks used these days won't smudge. If you want to keep the tissue in the invitation suite, place the tissue on top of the wedding invitation.

Vellum overlays are also popular. If you've decided to use one, it will generally sit atop your invitation card.

Step 4: Add the reception card

Place the reception card (if applicable) face-up on top of the invitation (or tissue paper, if you included it). This card outlines the time and location of the wedding reception and includes important information such as the requested dress code.

Step 5: Include other enclosure cards

Place any remaining enclosure cards—such as a map, hotel accommodations card, and travel information—face up on top of the reception card. If there is more than one enclosure card, the order doesn't matter unless they're different sizes. If they are different sizes, start with the largest enclosure card and work your way to the smallest.

Step 6: Don't forget the RSVP card

Place the reply envelope face-down on top of the enclosure cards. Insert the reply card under the reply envelope flap, face-up, so that the printed side is visible. Make sure that your reply envelope is pre-addressed and stamped.

Step 7: Insert into the envelope(s)

If you're using two envelopes (an inner envelope and an outer envelope), insert the now fully assembled invitation suite into the inner envelope (left edge first for a single-card invitation; folded edge first for a folded invitation). When the inner envelope flap is opened, you should see the printed side of the invitation. Insert the inner envelope into the outer envelope so that the handwritten guests' names on the inner envelope are visible when they open it up.

If you're using just one envelope (an outer envelope), insert the fully assembled invitation suite into the envelope (left edge first for a single-card invitation; folded edge first for a folded invitation). When the envelope flap is opened, you should see the printed side of the invitation.

Step 8: Seal the envelope(s)

Use a bottled envelope moistener to wet the gummed edge of your outer envelopes, being careful not to use too much to avoid soggy, puckered envelopes. After you’ve sealed all the envelopes, place a heavy book or two on top of the stack to ensure all of them are securely sealed.

Step 9: Add the return address

Make sure your envelopes have address labels. If you opt for a SkinnyWrap™ or a rubber stamp address label, this is when you would apply it to each envelope.

Step 10: Mail and done!

Before you mail your wedding invitations, bring a fully assembled set to the post office and ask them to weigh it so you know exactly how much postage you’ll need. Once all your envelopes are stamped with sufficient postage, bring them to the post office to be hand-cancelled instead of dropping them in a mailbox. Hand-cancelling alerts the post office to manually sort the envelopes rather than running them through machines, reducing the risk of your invites being damaged in the mail.

How to stuff the envelopes

The process of assembling and stuffing your wedding invitations is less complicated than it seems. Here is a step-by-step guide on how to stuff your wedding invitation envelopes:

• Create an assembly line: Clear off a table and give it a good wipe down. You don't want to smudge your pristine invitations. Then, lay out all the necessary pieces in neat piles. This includes the invitation itself, any enclosure cards, envelopes, and adornments like belly bands, vellum or tissue paper overlays, ribbons, and wax seals.
• Start with the invitation: Place the invitation face up on the table. Generally, this is the largest card in the invitation suite, so it makes sense that all additional pieces will be built upon it.
• Layer on tissue paper or a vellum overlay (optional): If you've included a sheet of tissue paper or a vellum overlay, it's your choice whether to use it or not. If you decide to include it, place it on top of the invitation card.
• Add the reception card: Place the reception card (if applicable) face-up on top of the invitation (or tissue paper, if used).
• Include other enclosure cards: Place any remaining enclosure cards, such as a map, hotel accommodations card, and travel information, face up on top of the reception card. If there is more than one enclosure card, start with the largest card and work your way down to the smallest.
• Don't forget the RSVP card: Place the reply envelope face-down on top of the enclosure cards, with the envelope flap on the left. Insert the reply card under the reply envelope flap, face-up, so that the printed side is visible. Make sure your reply envelope is pre-addressed and stamped.
• Insert the invitation suite into the inner envelope (optional): If you're using two envelopes (an inner and outer envelope), insert the fully assembled invitation suite into the inner envelope. When the envelope flap is opened, you should see the printed side of the invitation.
• Insert the invitation suite into the outer envelope: If you're using just one envelope (an outer envelope), insert the fully assembled invitation suite into the envelope. When the envelope flap is opened, you should see the printed side of the invitation.
• Seal the envelope: Use a bottled envelope moistener to wet the gummed edge of your outer envelopes, being careful not to use too much to avoid soggy, puckered envelopes. Place a heavy book on top of the stack to ensure they are securely sealed.
• Add the return address: Make sure your envelopes have address labels. You can use a SkinnyWrap, a rubber stamp address label, or another type of label.
• Mail your invitations: Before you mail your wedding invitations, bring a fully assembled set to the post office and ask them to weigh it so you know how much postage you'll need. Bring your envelopes to the post office to be hand-cancelled to reduce the risk of damage during mailing.

Tips and Tricks:

• Plan to assemble your wedding invitations at least a week before you want to mail them, especially if you're adding extras like wax seals or belly bands.
• Stuff your wedding invitations once they're all assembled. It's most efficient to create a full assembly line.
• If you're using an inner envelope, it's best to leave this unsealed but closed.
• The invitation should be face up inside the envelope, with the text facing the envelope flap. This way, guests can see the text as soon as they open the envelope.
• If you're using envelope liners, slide them into your envelopes before inserting your invitation suite.
• Bring a fully assembled invitation suite to the post office to determine the exact postage required, especially if you're adding extras like belly bands or ribbon.
• If you're addressing your envelopes by hand, give yourself enough time to double-check any funky details before sending them off.

Frequently asked questions