Wedding Invitation Card Pockets: To Address Or Not?

Wedding invitations are a crucial aspect of planning your special day. They offer guests a glimpse into the tone and elegance of the upcoming celebration. While addressing wedding invitations, it's essential to follow certain etiquette guidelines to ensure your guests feel welcomed and valued. This includes considerations for married couples, unmarried couples, single individuals, and families with children.

One traditional element of wedding invitations is the use of inner and outer envelopes. The outer envelope maintains a formal tone, usually including the recipient's full name and title. The inner envelope is more casual and may exclude certain elements of the formal name format.

Additionally, pocket wedding invitations are a popular choice for those seeking a formal and elegant option. These invitations are more elaborate and decorative, often featuring multiple cards or inserts with details such as RSVP cards, maps, and accommodation information. They create a sophisticated impression and convey the importance of the event.

When addressing wedding invitations, it's important to consider the different scenarios, such as addressing a married couple versus an unmarried couple or a family with children. Taking the time to address invitations properly is a thoughtful gesture that makes your guests feel valued and respected.

How to address wedding invitations to those with distinguished titles

When addressing wedding invitations to those with distinguished titles, it's important to follow the proper etiquette to ensure your guests feel welcomed and respected. Here are some guidelines to help you address invitations to individuals with distinguished titles correctly:

Doctors

For a married couple where one person is a doctor, use the following format:

• Outer envelope: "Doctor Tami Takata and Ms. Christina Smith"
• Inner envelope: "Dr. Takata and Ms. Smith" or "Tami and Christina"

If both individuals are doctors, address them as "The Doctors":

• Outer envelope: "The Doctors Smith" or "Drs. Matthew and Angela Smith"
• Inner envelope: "The Doctors Smith" or "Matthew and Angela"

Military Personnel

When addressing military personnel, ensure you know their correct title and rank. For a couple where one person is a military officer, list them first:

• Outer envelope: "Lieutenant Jonathan Kelly, US Navy and Mrs. Jane Kelly"
• Inner envelope: "Lieutenant Kelly, US Navy and Mrs. Kelly"

If both individuals have military titles, list their names alphabetically:

• Outer envelope: "Captains Jane and Jonathan Kelly, US Navy"
• Inner envelope: "The Captains Kelly"

Lawyers

When addressing lawyers, use the suffix "Esq." after their names. For a couple where one person is a lawyer:

• Outer envelope: "Michelle Brown, Esq. and Mr. John Brown"
• Inner envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. Brown"

If both individuals are lawyers, list their names alphabetically:

• Outer envelope: "Michelle Brown, Esq. and John Brown, Esq."
• Inner envelope: "Michelle and John"

Judges

When addressing a judge, use their formal title, "The Honorable":

• Outer envelope: "The Honorable Gina Rodriguez and Mx. Alice Rodriguez"
• Inner envelope: "Judge Rodriguez and Mx. Rodriguez"

If the judge is married, include their spouse's title. If the judge is single, you can add "and guest" if applicable.

General Guidelines

• Always use the guest's full, formal name and title.
• For doctors, write out the word "Doctor" on the outer envelope and abbreviate it as "Dr." on the inner envelope.
• For academic doctors (Ph.D.), the abbreviation "Dr." is appropriate.
• When in doubt, it's better to forgo titles altogether than to risk using an incorrect or outdated title.
• Remember to consider the hierarchy of titles when addressing couples. The person with the higher-ranking title should be named first, regardless of gender.

How to address a wedding invitation to a single person

When addressing a wedding invitation to a single person, it's important to use their preferred title. If you're unsure of their preference, it's best to leave out the title altogether. Here are some examples of how to address wedding invitations to single individuals:

For a Single Female:

• Outer envelope: "Ms." or "Miss" followed by their full name (e.g., Ms. Stephanie Chen).
• Inner envelope: Use their last name or first name (e.g., Ms. Chen or Stephanie).

If they have been given a plus-one, you can simply write "and guest" on the inner envelope (e.g., Ms. Chen and guest).

For a Single Male:

• Outer envelope: "Mr." followed by their full name if they are over 18 (e.g., Mr. James Montgomery). If they are younger, no title is needed.
• Inner envelope: Use their last name or first name (e.g., Mr. Montgomery or James).

If they have been offered a plus-one, you can indicate this on the inner envelope as "and guest" (e.g., Mr. Montgomery and guest).

For a Non-Binary Individual:

Outer envelope: Use the honorific "Mx." followed by their full name if you are sure they use this title (e.g., Mx. Courtney Andrews). If you're unsure, it's best to ask for their preference.

For a Widow:

Outer envelope: "Mrs." followed by their husband's full name or their married name, depending on their preference (e.g., Mrs. George Devereaux).

For a Divorced Woman:

Outer envelope: "Mrs." or "Ms." followed by either her ex-husband's last name (if she still uses it) or her maiden name, according to her preference (e.g., Mrs./Ms. Cookie Lyon).

How to address a wedding invitation to a family

When addressing a wedding invitation to a family, it's important to follow certain etiquette rules to ensure clarity and avoid any misunderstandings. Here are some guidelines to help you address wedding invitations to a family:

Outer Envelope:

• For a formal invitation, use titles and complete names. Address a married couple as "Mr. and Mrs." followed by the husband's full name, or include both names if they have different last names. For unmarried couples, list each name on a separate line or the same line if they live together.
• When addressing children, use "Miss" for girls under 18, while boys don't need a title until they're 16. If you're inviting children over 18, send them separate invitations.
• If you're inviting a widow, use her preferred title and name. You can reach out to a family member to confirm her preference.
• For same-sex couples, follow the same rules as for opposite-sex couples.
• Use honorifics for guests with distinguished titles, such as doctors, lawyers, or military personnel.
• Avoid abbreviations and nicknames. Use full names and middle names if possible.

Inner Envelope:

• The inner envelope is more informal. You can use first names only or a combination of titles and last names.
• List the first names of the invited children in order of age. If you don't list the children's names, it implies that they are not invited.
• If you're inviting a family but don't want to specify individual names, simply address it to "The [Family Name] Family."

General Tips:

• Give yourself enough time to assemble and mail the invitations.
• Use the same return and RSVP address to avoid confusion.
• Stuff the envelopes carefully, ensuring the invitation faces the flap of the inner envelope.
• Weigh your invitations before mailing to ensure you have the correct postage.

How to address wedding invitations with one envelope

Wedding invitations can include an inner envelope, but this is optional. The outer envelope is stamped and addressed, while the inner envelope only has the names of the invitees and contains the invitation inside. Here is a step-by-step guide on how to address wedding invitations with a single envelope:

Step 1: Get the main invitation card

Place the invitation card at the bottom, print side up.

Step 2: Add vellum liners

If you have chosen to include a thin sheet of vellum, place it on top of the invitation card.

Step 3: Stack the reception card

If you are using a reception card, place it face up on top of the wedding invite.

Step 4: Stack other enclosure cards

Place any remaining enclosure cards, such as direction or detail cards, face up on top of the reception card. If you have a wedding website, include the address and password on one of these cards.

Step 5: Add a RSVP card and envelope to the suite

Place the envelope for your RSVP, printed side down, on top of the enclosure cards, with the envelope flap on the left. Insert the reply card under the envelope flap, face up.

Step 6: Time for the Finishing Touch

If you are adding a belly band, ribbon, or vellum wrap, assemble this now.

Step 7: Addressing the envelope

Print the names and addresses of your guests directly on the outer envelope.

Step 8: Insert the whole suite into the envelope

Insert the fully assembled invitation suite into the envelope with the left edge first for a single-card invitation, or the folded edge first for a folded invitation. Ensure that the text is print-side up.

Step 9: Seal the envelope

Use a bottled envelope moistener to wet the gummed edge of the envelope, then place a heavy book on top to ensure it is securely sealed.

Step 10: Return Address

Add address labels to your envelopes.

Step 11: Mail and done!

Before mailing your wedding invitations, bring a fully assembled set to the post office to be weighed so you know how much postage you will need.

Tips:

• If you are addressing an invitation to a married couple with the same last name, you can write: "Mr. and Mrs. Jackson Clarke" or "Mr. Jackson Clarke and Mrs. Mary Clarke".
• For married couples with different last names, write out their full names with "Mr." or "Mrs." on the stationery, e.g. "Mrs. Gwyneth Brookes and Mr. Cyan Matthews".
• When addressing a single person, use the appropriate prefix: "Mr." for male guests, "Ms." for female guests, and "Mx." for non-binary guests.
• If you are inviting a family with young children (under 18), reserve the outer envelope for the parent(s) or guardian(s) and list each child by name on the inner envelope.
• For unmarried couples living together, include both names on the envelope, with each name on a separate line.

How to address a wedding invitation to a married couple

When addressing a wedding invitation to a married couple, there are a few things to keep in mind. The outer envelope should be formal and include the recipient's full name(s) and their personal title(s). For a heterosexual married couple with the same last name, you can use "Mr. and Mrs." followed by the husband's first and last name. For example, "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Warren". If you'd like to address both partners equally, you can include both the husband's and wife's first and last names, like this: "Mr. Thomas Warren and Mrs. Linda Belcher".

If the married couple has different last names, write their names on the same line with the woman's name first. For instance, "Ms. Maria Stevens and Mr. David Estevez". If one partner has a hyphenated name, list the hyphenated name last. An example of this would be: "Mr. Andy Dwyer and Ms. April Ludgate-Dwyer".

The inner envelope is more informal, so you have the option to leave out certain elements of the formal name format. For example, for a married couple with the same last name, you could write "Mr. and Mrs. Warren" or use their first names, like "Thomas and Michelle".

It's important to note that some modern women may prefer to have their full name included instead of having their name left out or lumped in with their husband's. In this case, you would write "Mr. Thomas Warren and Mrs. Michelle Warren" on the outer envelope and "Mr. Warren and Mrs. Warren" or "Thomas and Michelle" on the inner envelope.

Additionally, be sure to double-check each attendee's preferred personal titles, especially if they have distinguished titles such as "Doctor" or military ranks.

Frequently asked questions