Best Man Speech: Before Or After 'I Do'?

The best man's speech is a wedding highlight, and while it only lasts about 10 minutes, it will be remembered for a lifetime. It is traditionally given at the wedding reception after the maid of honor gives her speech. The best man's speech should be positive, respectful, and congratulatory, focusing on the groom with some references to the bride. It is an opportunity to make the bride feel special and appreciated and welcome her into the best man's crazy crew. It is also a chance to share humorous and heartfelt stories and inside jokes (used sparingly) and to compliment the bride and her family. The speech should be well-prepared, rehearsed, and last 3-5 minutes.

How to Start a Best Man Speech

So, you've been asked to be the best man and now you need to write a speech? Don't panic! Here's a step-by-step guide to crafting a memorable best man speech that will leave the newlyweds and guests laughing, crying, and raising their glasses.

Step 1: Prepare in Advance

First things first, don't wing it! The key to a great best man speech is preparation. Take the time to plan and write your speech beforehand, and if you're feeling nervous, practise in front of a mirror or with a small group of friends. This will help you feel more confident and ensure your speech is well-received.

Step 2: Start with Gratitude

Begin your speech by expressing gratitude. Thank the couple, their families, and the guests for being a part of this special day. This is a simple yet effective way to break the ice and set a positive tone for the rest of your speech.

Step 3: Add a Touch of Humour

Inject some humour into your speech, but use caution. Opt for light-hearted and good-natured jokes that are suitable for a diverse audience. Avoid inside jokes that only a few people will understand, and steer clear of inappropriate or embarrassing stories about the groom. A little self-deprecating humour can go a long way!

Step 4: Share a Sentimental Story

Transition from humour to sentiment by sharing a heartfelt story about your friendship with the groom. Talk about how you met, the duration of your friendship, and what makes it special. This is your chance to compliment the groom and show your support for his marriage.

Step 5: Compliment the Couple

Take the opportunity to compliment the bride and wish the couple well. Highlight their positive attributes and the unique aspects of their relationship. You can also share a few words of wisdom or advice for a happy marriage.

Step 6: End with a Toast

Conclude your speech by proposing a toast to the newlyweds. This is your chance to raise your glass and wish them a lifetime of love, happiness, and prosperity. Leave the guests with a memorable final line that encapsulates your friendship with the groom and your support for their union.

Remember, the best man speech is typically delivered after the maid of honour's speech and should be kept concise, aiming for around 3 to 5 minutes. Focus on the groom and his bride, and avoid making it all about yourself. With a bit of preparation and authenticity, you'll deliver a best man speech that is both entertaining and meaningful.

Best Man Speech Topics to Avoid

The best man's speech is usually given at the wedding reception after the maid of honour's speech. Here are some topics to avoid when giving a best man speech:

• Talking about yourself. This is a common mistake, but the speech should be about the groom, not you.
• Mentioning former partners of the groom. This is the bride's big day, so don't bring up any of the groom's exes.
• Using props. Props can make the day trickier and the speech less effective. They can also be a technical nightmare.
• Using overdone jokes. Avoid jokes about the wedding cake being in tiers, or the best man getting up from a warm seat with a piece of paper in their hand. Be more creative!
• Being mean. It's not funny, it's just uncomfortable.
• Making ""ball and chain" jokes or similar. These are childish and misogynistic.
• Rambling. Keep the speech short and sweet.
• Commenting on anyone's appearance.
• Telling embarrassing stories about anyone.
• Sharing need-to-know anecdotes.
• Drinking too much before the speech.

Best Man Speech Length

The best man's speech is traditionally given at the wedding reception, after the maid of honor has given her speech. It is an opportunity to make your best bro look good in front of all his friends and family. It should be positive, respectful, and congratulatory, focusing on a central theme or story about the groom.

The ideal length for a best man's speech is around 3 to 5 minutes. This gives enough time to cover the essentials without losing the audience's attention. If you have a lot to say, it's better to edit your speech down to the most important points and leave the audience wanting more.

• Introduction: Start with a catchy one-liner, such as a funny joke, a compliment, or an inspirational quote about brotherhood or marriage. This will capture the audience's attention and leave them wanting more.
• Compliment the wedding: Show respect to the guests by highlighting something you like about the wedding, such as the venue, food, or music.
• Express gratitude: Thank those who made the wedding possible, including the couple for inviting you, and the groom for choosing you as his best man.
• Tell a story: Share a short story about your relationship with the groom. This is the "meat" of the speech and can include how you met, your favorite memories, or a funny experience.
• Admire the couple: Express your support for their marriage and list a few things you admire about their bond.
• Summarize your thoughts: Recap your key ideas and emphasize your support for the couple's marriage.
• Toast to the future: Raise your glass and invite the audience to join you in toasting the couple's love.

Remember to prepare and practice your speech in advance. A well-prepared and rehearsed speech will help you feel more confident and ensure your message is clear, memorable, and perfectly suited for the occasion.

Best Man Speech Delivery Tips

Being the best man at a wedding is a huge honour, but it also comes with a lot of responsibility. One of your main duties is to deliver a speech that is memorable, funny, and heartfelt. Here are some tips to help you deliver a knockout best man speech:

Plan and Practice

Don't wing it! A best man speech is not the time to improvise. Take the time to plan and write your speech in advance. Practice in front of a mirror, with friends or family, or record yourself to review your body language and delivery. Experts recommend rehearsing a speech at least 10 times before performing it.

Know Your Audience

Keep the content classy and relatable for all ages. Avoid inside jokes that will go over people's heads, and steer clear of inappropriate topics, crude jokes, and embarrassing stories. Remember, this is a family event, and you want your speech to be inclusive and well-received by everyone.

Structure Your Speech

A great speech follows a clear structure. Start with a strong, attention-grabbing opener, such as a funny one-liner, a compliment, or an inspirational quote. Then, express gratitude to the couple, their families, and the guests. Share a short story or anecdote about the groom, and admire the couple together, highlighting what makes them perfect for each other. Finally, propose a toast to the couple's future happiness.

Keep it Concise

Aim for a speech duration of 3 to 5 minutes. Any longer, and you risk losing your audience's attention. If you have a lot to say, edit your content down to the essentials. It's always better to leave them wanting more.

Balance Humour and Sincerity

A best man speech is typically lighthearted and humorous, but it should also have sincere and heartfelt moments. Share personal stories, inside jokes, and genuine emotions about the groom and the couple. This will make your speech memorable and add a touch of sentiment to the celebration.

Compliment the Couple

Focus on the groom, but don't forget to compliment the bride as well. Highlight how she has positively influenced the groom and share your well-wishes for their future together. Avoid any jokes or comments that might embarrass or insult the bride.

Avoid Clichés

Stay away from overused quotes and jokes. Opt for fresh and unique content that reflects your personality and relationship with the groom. This will make your speech more engaging and memorable.

Stay Calm and Confident

No matter how well-written your speech is, your delivery matters. Take deep breaths and use positive body language to project confidence. Smile, make eye contact, and use hand gestures to engage your audience. Remember, it's normal to feel nervous, but don't let it overwhelm you. Your confidence will shine through with proper preparation and practice.

Best Man Speech Examples

The best man's speech is usually the most eagerly awaited of all the wedding speeches and traditionally comes last. It should be packed with jokes, embarrassing stories about the groom, and some lovely words for the wedding party. Here are some examples of best man speeches to inspire you.

"Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, for those of you I haven't had the pleasure of meeting yet, my name is Chris, and I am officially Paul's second best man... second best, ladies and gentlemen... nobody likes to be second best, do they? Well, Paul, looking at his career, he should know better than most... anyway, where were we?"

"Good evening ladies and gentlemen, before I begin, I'd just like to introduce myself: my name is Chris, and it is my very great honor and privilege to be the first of Mark's two best men... we had to split it... 46 years is quite a long time to cover all in one go! Over the course of the next few minutes, I'll be taking you through Mark's sporting heroics, dealing with incredible loss, and being caned by people dressed as nuns... which, in fact, had nothing to do with the stag do."

"Good evening ladies and gentlemen, over the next few minutes, we'll be talking about the man for whom Scottish Independence now means asking his English wife if he can go to the pub at the weekend. I can't help but think that an English woman telling a Scottish man he can't go to the pub would be a new low in this country's rich cultural history."

"Over the next few minutes, I'll be taking you on the rollercoaster ride that has been Sean's life to date, and there are some amazing stories; like the time he was playing A ball with David Cameron in Mexico, and his dog ate the Prime Minister's guinea pig, and he had to sell my passport to repair his own nose... actually, I've known Sean for 30 years... I might have muddled a few things up there."

"Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, before I begin, I would just like to take this opportunity to introduce myself to those of you I haven't yet met. My name is Dave, and this is Bob, and together it is our very great pleasure and privilege to be Colin's best men for today's celebrations."

"Ladies and gentlemen, they say the perfect speech should last as long as the perfect... well, never mind. Let's keep this family-friendly. I'm Alex, and I've watched [Groom] evolve from someone who thought instant noodles were gourmet cuisine to someone who can actually operate a washing machine. [Bride], we all know who we have to thank for that miracle."

"Their love story is like a perfect recipe: take one hopeless romantic, add one amazing woman, sprinkle in some laughter, and season with just the right amount of crazy. Mix well, and you get what we're celebrating today."

"To my best friend: you've found your perfect match. To [Bride]: you've found someone who will always make you laugh, even if it's not always intentional. To both of you: may your love story continue to be the best kind of adventure."

"Ladies and gentlemen, when I think about my friendship with [Groom], I'm reminded of all the moments that have led us here. From building blanket forts in primary school to helping each other through life's challenges, he's been more than a friend – he's been my brother."

"I remember the day [Groom] called me about meeting [Bride]. There was something different in his voice – a kind of excitement I'd never heard before. He said, 'I've met someone special,' and for once, he wasn't talking about a new PlayStation game."

"Watching their love story unfold has been like watching your favorite book come to life. Every chapter has been better than the last. [Bride], you've brought out the best in him. You've taken my best friend – someone who once tried to cure a cold with pizza and energy drinks – and helped him become the man standing before us today."

"Ladies and gentlemen, love isn't just about finding someone you can live with – it's about finding someone you can't live without. Standing here today, looking at [Groom] and [Bride], I see two people who have found exactly that."

"I met [Groom] during our university days, when our biggest worry was making it to morning lectures. Over the years, I've watched him chase his dreams, face his fears, and grow into the man he is today. But the most beautiful transformation happened when [Bride] came into his life."

"Their love story isn't just about grand gestures or perfect moments. It's about the quiet understanding between two people who just fit together. It's about supporting each other's dreams, sharing life's adventures, and facing challenges hand in hand."

"Ladies and gentlemen, I am privileged to serve as the best man on this joyous occasion. When [Groom] asked me to take on this role, I was both honored and humbled – much like how he felt when [Bride] agreed to go on their first date."

"Dearest friends and family, I am privileged to serve as the best man on this joyous occasion. [Groom] and I have shared many adventures over the years, from school days to professional lives. He has consistently demonstrated the qualities that make him not just a good friend but a truly outstanding person: loyalty, compassion, and an unwavering sense of humor – even if his jokes occasionally need explanation."

"Ladies and gentlemen, I've known [Groom] since we were fighting over the Nintendo controller in primary school. Back then, his idea of a perfect match was beating the final boss in Mario. Now he's found his perfect Player 2 in [Bride]."

"I've watched [Groom]'s character development over the years – from someone who thought 'commitment' meant pre-ordering a game to someone who plans date nights and remembers anniversaries. Though I notice he still uses 'just one more level' as an excuse for being late."

"Their love story is like the perfect gameplay: the tutorial phase – awkward first dates and learning each other's controls; the main quest – moving in together and discovering that 'clean' means more than just pushing everything under the bed; and now they've reached the boss level: marriage."

"Ladies and gentlemen, I've known [Groom] long enough to have enough embarrassing stories to fill a book. But since we only have a few minutes, I'll save those for the after-party."

"Ladies and gentlemen, when your brother asks you to be his best man, it comes with certain responsibilities. Like sharing embarrassing childhood stories – but don't worry, Mom made me promise to keep the really good ones for family reunions."

"Growing up with [Groom] has been an adventure. From fighting over the TV remote to covering for each other when we snuck out as teenagers – sorry, Mom and Dad, there's no statute of limitations on that one. But watching him grow into the man he is today has been my greatest joy as his brother."

"Ladies and gentlemen, I met [Groom] during freshman orientation, when we both thought ramen noodles counted as a food group and doing laundry once a month was perfectly acceptable. Our friendship was forged in the trenches of all-night study sessions, questionable dining hall decisions, and that one memorable incident with campus security that we're still not allowed to talk about."

"Ladies and gentlemen, I first met [Groom] in Business Statistics, where we both shared the same lost expression and desperate need for caffeine. We formed a study group that quickly became less about studying and more about debating which pizza place would deliver to the library at 2 AM."

"Good evening everyone, I'm joining you live from the head table – and no, you can't mute me or turn off your camera for this one. I met [Groom] during the grand era of virtual happy hours, and 'you're on mute' became our most-used phrase."

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