Wedding Invitation Etiquette: Registry Cards, Tacky Or Tasteful?

Wedding registry cards are a highly debated topic in wedding planning. Some people consider it rude and aggressive to include registry information on wedding invitations as it may come across as if the couple cares more about receiving gifts than sharing their special day with loved ones. However, others argue that it is helpful to include this information to guide guests who want to give gifts but may not be close enough to the couple to know where they are registered. While there is no one-size-fits-all answer, it is generally advised to avoid putting registry cards directly in the wedding invitations. Instead, there are alternative ways to inform guests about the registry, such as including an informational insert with a link to the wedding website or relying on word-of-mouth through close family and friends.

Wedding invitation wording

Do Not Mention Gifts on Wedding Invitations

It is generally agreed that wedding invitations should not mention gifts at all, even if you are requesting no gifts. Wedding invitations are about inviting guests to share your special day and building excitement for the upcoming celebration. You want your guests to feel delighted to be included, without worrying about gifts.

Include an Informational Insert

One option is to include an informational insert card in the envelope along with your wedding invitation. This card can include a link to your wedding website, where guests can find information about your wedding registry. This approach is more subtle than including registry details on the invitation itself and is a common practice, as guests often expect to find RSVP cards, reception cards, and wedding programs in the same envelope.

Spread the Word Through Family and Friends

Another option is to rely on word of mouth. Inform your close family members and friends about your wedding registry, and they can spread the word to other guests when asked. This method has been traditionally used even before the advent of wedding websites. If guests want to give you a gift, they will likely ask you directly or someone close to you about your registry preferences.

Create a Wedding Website

Setting up a wedding website is an effective way to provide guests with all the necessary information about your wedding, including registry details. Include a link to your wedding website on an information card within your wedding invitation suite. This approach allows guests to easily access all the wedding-related information in one place.

Include Registry Information in Shower Invitations

While it is generally discouraged to include registry information in wedding invitations, it is acceptable to do so in bridal shower invitations. Guests invited to a bridal shower typically expect to bring a gift, so providing registry details in this context is more appropriate.

Be Mindful of Etiquette

It is important to remember that including registry information directly on wedding invitations can imply that receiving gifts is more important to you than sharing your special day with loved ones. It may also give the impression that a gift is required for attendance. To avoid offending your guests, refrain from mentioning registry details on the invitations themselves.

In summary, while there are differing opinions on the exact approach, the general consensus is to avoid including registry cards directly in your wedding invitations. Instead, utilize informational inserts, wedding websites, word of mouth, or bridal shower invitations to communicate your registry details. Remember, your wedding invitations should focus on inviting guests to celebrate your special day, and gift-related information can be conveyed through other means.

Wedding registry etiquette

Including registry cards in wedding invitations is considered poor etiquette by many people. It can be interpreted as implying that a gift is a requirement for attendance and that receiving gifts is more important to the couple than sharing their special day with loved ones.

Alternatives to Including Registry Cards

• Word of mouth: Close family members and friends can spread the word about the registry to wedding guests.
• Bridal shower invitations: It is considered acceptable to include registry information on shower invitations.
• Wedding website: Couples can include a link to their wedding website in their invitations, which can then direct guests to their registry.
• Save the dates: Registry information can be included on save the dates, which are sent out before wedding invitations.
• Separate registry postcards: Couples can send out postcards with registry information separately from the invitations.
• Email: The couple can also send an email with the registry details.
• Facebook: Creating a Facebook page for the wedding and posting the registry information is another option.

Other Considerations

• It is generally considered rude to ask directly for cash as a wedding gift. However, couples can get around this by creating a honeymoon registry, where guests can contribute to specific experiences, such as airfare, accommodations, tours, or dinners.
• It is also possible to set up a cash fund, where guests can contribute any amount of money without being limited to the cost of specific gifts.

Wedding website creation

Creating a wedding website is a great way to keep your guests informed and excited about your upcoming nuptials. It serves as a one-stop shop for all the information your guests may need, and it can be easily updated and customised to match your wedding's theme and style. Here are some tips and steps to help you create a comprehensive and engaging wedding website:

• Choose a platform: There are several websites that offer free wedding website creation tools, such as The Knot, WithJoy, and Zola. These platforms provide customisable templates, matching stationery, and other helpful features.
• Design and personalise: Select a design template that fits your wedding's theme and style. You can customise the website with your engagement photos, colour schemes, and fonts. Some platforms even allow you to tweak the CSS for a more personalised look.
• Share your love story: Your wedding website is the perfect place to share your journey as a couple. Include details such as how you met, your engagement story, and any other fun anecdotes that your guests may enjoy.
• Provide essential information: Make sure to include all the important details your guests need to know. This includes the wedding date, location, schedule of events, dress code, travel and accommodation recommendations, directions to the venue, and any other relevant logistics.
• Create an FAQ section: Anticipate your guests' questions and create a comprehensive FAQ section. Address topics such as parking, transportation, attire suggestions, dietary restrictions, and any other common queries.
• Registry information: Your wedding website is an appropriate place to include your gift registry information. Guests can easily access this information and shop for gifts in one convenient spot.
• RSVP management: Utilise the RSVP features on your wedding website to keep track of guest responses and meal preferences. This simplifies the process of managing RSVPs and provides an easy way for guests to confirm their attendance.
• Privacy settings: Depending on your preferences, you can set password protection for your wedding website or specific pages within it. This ensures that only invited guests can access certain information.
• Matching stationery: Many wedding website platforms offer matching stationery, including save-the-dates and invitations. This creates a cohesive and coordinated experience for your guests.
• Update and remind: Keep your wedding website up to date with any changes or additions to your wedding plans. Use the website to send quick reminders to your guests, ensuring they have all the latest information.

By following these steps, you can create a comprehensive and engaging wedding website that delights and informs your guests. It serves as a central hub for all the essential information, simplifying the wedding planning process for both you and your guests.

Gift-giving etiquette

When it comes to gift-giving, it's important to remember that the cardinal rule of wedding etiquette is to never ask for cash directly as a wedding present. While some traditions have faded, this one remains. Asking for cash can come across as tacky and rude.

So, is it considered presumptuous or aggressive to include registry information on wedding invitations? The short answer is no. Your wedding invitations are about building excitement for your upcoming celebration. You want your guests to feel honoured and delighted to be included in your special day, not worrying about gifts.

If you don't add your registry to your invites, where do you put it? Well, you can include an informational insert in the envelope with a link to your wedding website. Your wedding website is a one-stop shop for guests to access all your wedding information, so they'll expect to find your wedding registry there too. This is a much more subtle approach when it comes to asking for gifts. It's also common to include RSVP cards, reception cards and wedding programs in the same envelope, so an additional stationery card with your registry details won't be questioned.

Another option is to rely on word of mouth. Have your close family members and friends spread the word to whoever asks. This is how couples shared their registry details before wedding websites were a thing. And if guests want to get you a gift, they'll have no problem asking you directly about your registry.

If you're having a bridal shower, you can include your registry details in the shower invitations. This is an expected and acceptable place to share your registry information.

You could also create a Facebook page or another type of social media page for your wedding, which takes less time and effort than setting up a full wedding website. Then you can post your registry details there.

Remember, your wedding is about celebrating your love and sharing your special day with your loved ones. Gifts are secondary, and there are plenty of ways to share your registry details without including them on your wedding invitations.

Bridal shower invitations

When it comes to wedding invitations, it is generally considered poor etiquette to include registry cards. This is because doing so may give the impression that receiving gifts is more important to the couple than sharing their special day with loved ones. However, this doesn't mean that guests shouldn't be informed about the registry at all. Here are some tips for bridal shower invitations:

Finalise the guest list:

Don't assume you know every person who should be invited to the bridal shower. Check with the bride to ensure no one is missed or invited against their wishes.

Know the bride's colours:

It is customary to use the bride's wedding colours in the bridal shower invitations, even though she is not the host. This ties the shower into the overall wedding theme.

Select a design that represents the bride:

Choose a theme that suits the bride's personality and tastes, such as a tea party, kitchen, beach, or garden party.

Include all the necessary details:

Make sure to include the name of the bride-to-be, the date, time, and location of the bridal shower, the name(s) of the host(s), RSVP information, and any special instructions, such as dress code or what guests should bring.

• Send out invitations with enough notice:
• Consult with the bride:

While traditionally the maid of honour or host chooses and sends the invitations, it is a good idea to involve the bride in the process. This ensures that the invitations align with her preferences and the wedding theme.

Be creative with the wording:

Feel free to add a creative touch to the wording of the invitation. Unlike a wedding invitation, the wording of a bridal shower invitation doesn't have to be formal unless you want it to be.

Include registry information:

While it is considered poor etiquette to include registry information in wedding invitations, it is perfectly acceptable to include it in bridal shower invitations. This ensures that guests know what gifts to bring or where to find the registry information.

Frequently asked questions