The Ultimate Guide To Being An Unforgettable Best Man

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Being the best man at a wedding is a great honour and a big responsibility. The best man is the groom's right-hand man, supporting him throughout the planning process and on the big day itself. The role typically falls to a close friend or relative, such as a brother, and involves a variety of duties, from planning the bachelor party to giving a memorable speech. So, how can you be the best best man there is?

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Help choose the suits

As the best man, you'll have a key role in helping to choose the suits. Here's what you need to know:

Before Shopping

Firstly, discuss ideas with the couple about the style, colour, and accessories. It's also important to decide whether the suits will be bought or hired, and whether financial contributions are required. Communicate this with the ushers so that everyone is aware before trying anything on.

During Shopping

You'll need to assist the groom in rounding up the ushers and other important members of the wedding party to go and try on suits. It's a good idea to make this super fun by inviting the couple and the rest of the wedding party, ordering food and drinks, and using it as a chance to bond.

After Shopping

Keep an eye out for any last-minute suit fittings the groom or groomsmen might need as the wedding gets closer. Things can get hectic for the couple, so this is your chance to step in and keep on top of any final alterations.

Returning Suits

If the couple is heading off on their honeymoon straight after the wedding, they'll really appreciate your help in returning hired items, which often includes the suits. If the suits weren't hired, you may be tasked with taking them to be dry-cleaned.

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Plan the bachelor party

Planning a bachelor party can be stressful, but it doesn't have to be. Here is a step-by-step guide to help you plan an unforgettable celebration for the groom-to-be.

Pick a Date

Choose a date that works for the groom, groomsmen, and yourself. Ideally, select a date one to three months before the wedding, opting for a Friday or Saturday to accommodate those who work on weekdays.

Talk to the Groom

Understand the groom's preferences for activities, location, tone, and guest list. Is he expecting a wild weekend or a low-key gathering? Does he want to go to a strip club or avoid it? Knowing his wishes will help shape the party.

Set a Budget

Discuss budget expectations with the groomsmen and friends. The groom should not be involved in budgeting, as the party is a gift to him. However, consider his wishes for the type of party, whether low-key or extravagant, to guide your planning.

Choose Activities

Make a list of budget-friendly options that the groom would enjoy. Some ideas include golf, wine tasting, paintballing, a large dinner, a night out, or a camping trip. Avoid dangerous activities or those that could go wrong when combined with drinking.

Create a Guest List

Include the groomsmen, the groom's close friends, and relatives. Consult the groom about any uncertainties and run the final guest list by him before sending invitations.

Send Invitations

Send invitations with the party's location, date, and a mandatory RSVP. Keep a record of who you've invited and who has responded to have an accurate headcount for planning purposes.

Make Travel Plans

Book flights, accommodation, and transport for the group. Consider the group's size, the duration of your stay, and your transportation needs. Limo companies can provide transport for large groups, ensuring safe travel if drinking is involved.

Make Reservations for Activities

Reserve activities that require bookings, such as golf, camping, paintballing, or nightclubs.

Plan for Food

Decide on dining options, considering the group's dietary restrictions and allergies. Plan meals according to your activities and accommodation to ensure you have time for everything.

Plan for Alcohol

Estimate the quantity and types of alcohol needed, including drinks at restaurants, clubs, or bars. Ensure you have the funds to cover these expenses, and decide if you need a catering company for drinks.

Stay Organised and Communicative

During the party, stay in control by drinking moderately and keeping track of the group's whereabouts. Communicate with the guests to ensure everyone is happy and getting along.

Stay Safe

Ensure no one drives after drinking, and avoid wandering off alone in potentially dangerous areas. Implement a buddy system to keep track of everyone's whereabouts.

Handle Any Problems

Be prepared to manage any mishaps, arguments, or accidents. Assist those who have had too much to drink or are feeling unwell, and help them get back to their accommodation safely.

Pay Attention to the Groom

As the best man, it's your job to ensure the groom is having a great time. Keep an eye on his preferences and comfort level, especially regarding activities that involve making fun of him or taking compromising photos.

With these steps in mind, you're well on your way to planning an incredible bachelor party that the groom and guests will remember for years to come!

The Unreliable Best Man: What to Do?

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Give an amazing speech

Being chosen as the best man for a wedding is an honour that comes with great responsibility. One of your main tasks is to give a memorable speech. It's a chance to celebrate the groom, entertain the guests, and show your support for the happy couple. Here are some tips to help you deliver an amazing best man speech:

Preparation

Before you begin writing your speech, it's a good idea to jot down your thoughts, feelings, memories and anecdotes about the groom. Think about every story, anecdote or event that involves the groom and make a list of these. Consider when you first met, what their nickname was at school, what they have gotten into trouble for, what triumphs or tribulations they have faced, and any ridiculous hobbies, interests or fashion trends they have followed.

Using a Template

Most people have never had to write a best man speech before, so it's normal to have no idea where to start. Using a template can be a helpful starting point and give you an idea of what to include.

Opening and Closing Lines

The opening and closing lines of your speech will leave a lasting impression, so it's important to make them compelling and memorable. Find an opening line that grabs the audience's attention and sets the tone for your speech. End your speech with a memorable closing line that ties back to the theme of your speech and expresses your well-wishes for the couple.

Adding Personal Touches

Share stories, funny or heartwarming anecdotes, and embarrassing experiences that show who the groom is and your relationship with him. It's also important to share what the groom means to you. There is a reason you were chosen to be the best man, so express the things you like about him and what he means to you.

Delivery

Even if you're a natural speaker, it's a good idea to practice your speech as much as possible. Rehearse it multiple times to familiarise yourself with the content, timing and flow. Practising in front of a mirror or with a trusted friend can help you refine your delivery for a polished performance. Remember to connect with the audience by maintaining eye contact, speaking clearly, using hand gestures and expressing your emotions genuinely.

Timing

There isn't a set time limit for speeches, but shorter is usually better. Aim for around 4-7 minutes.

Addressing the Couple

With all the fun stories and anecdotes, don't forget to talk directly to the couple. Make sure to look at them and wish them a happy future and life together.

Toast

Finally, it's time to make the toast. You can come up with something clever to say or simply ask everyone to lift their glasses and say "to the couple".

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Be the groom's right-hand man

Being the groom's right-hand man is about more than just smiling for photos and giving a good speech. It's a role that comes with a lot of responsibility and requires thorough preparation and work. Here are some tips to help you be the groom's right-hand man:

Before the Wedding:

  • Start planning the stag do early. Ask the groom for a guest list and preferred dates, and consider everyone's budget. Try to organise it at least a month before the wedding.
  • Offer to help with wedding planning duties, such as contacting suppliers or finding wedding transport.
  • Write and practice your speech well in advance. Make notes of ideas and anecdotes, and refine your stories and jokes. Keep it concise, meaningful, and under 10 minutes. Avoid shock humour and hacky jokes, and remember to say something nice about the bride.
  • Help choose suits for the bridal party. Offer your honest opinion to ensure the groom looks his best.
  • Be excited and supportive. Even if you have mixed feelings about the wedding, stay positive and be the life of the party.
  • Organise a gift from the groomsmen to the groom. It's a thoughtful touch and a nice memento of the occasion.

During the Wedding:

  • Be the point person for the ushers. Keep them organised and informed, and make sure they know their duties, such as handing out orders of service and guiding guests.
  • Stay organised and prepared. Have a kit with essentials like a spare copy of the groom's speech.
  • Help the groom get ready on the morning of the wedding. Ensure his suit and tie are perfect, and hand out buttonholes.
  • Keep the rings safe. This is a small but crucial task, especially if there are ring bearers involved, such as children or animals.
  • Greet guests with the groom and stand by his side at the altar.
  • Get the party started by being the first on the dance floor, but don't get too drunk. You want to remember this special day and remain responsible.

After the Wedding:

  • Return hired items, such as groomsmen outfits and decorative details.
  • Decorate the newlyweds' car. This is a fun task and your chance to be creative.

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Keep the wedding rings safe

As the best man, you play a crucial role in the wedding ceremony, and one of your most important tasks is to ensure the wedding rings are safe and ready for the exchange. Here are some tips to help you fulfil this duty:

Before the Wedding

It is not customary to hand over the wedding rings to the best man weeks or even months before the wedding. The longer they are out of the couple's possession, the greater the chance of them being misplaced. It is best to hand over the rings to the best man on the morning of the wedding or, at the earliest, the night before.

Transporting the Rings

When transporting the rings to the wedding venue, it is advisable to keep them in a box. A ring box is easier to locate than a loose ring and less likely to slip out of a pocket. If the best man is wearing a suit with inner pockets, he should check for holes to ensure the rings remain securely inside.

During the Ceremony

If the best man is also the ring bearer, he should hold onto the rings until the officiant calls for them. If a young child is the ring bearer, it is advisable to secure the rings tightly to the pillow they are carrying to prevent them from falling off. Alternatively, the child can carry fake rings for added peace of mind.

After the Ceremony

Once the rings have been exchanged, the best man's responsibility for the rings is complete. He can return them to the newlyweds or a designated family member or friend for safekeeping.

General Ring Care Tips

  • Regular cleaning and maintenance will keep the rings in good condition. Warm water and soap, chemical solutions, or baking soda are effective cleaning methods, but different materials require different care, so check before cleaning.
  • Avoid wearing the rings in water, as they can easily slip off and be lost down the drain.
  • When not wearing the rings, store them consistently in the same place, such as a ring box or soft cloth pouch.
  • Consider insuring the rings to protect against loss or damage.

Remember, as the best man, you play a pivotal role in ensuring the wedding ceremony runs smoothly. By following these tips, you can confidently fulfil your duty and keep the wedding rings safe and secure.

Frequently asked questions

The best man is the groom's right-hand man and go-to confidant throughout the engagement and wedding planning process. Duties include planning the bachelor party, writing a speech, helping to choose the wedding attire, and keeping the wedding rings safe.

A best man speech should be memorable, entertaining, and supportive of the happy couple. It should include funny, heartwarming, or embarrassing stories about the groom, and express what the groom means to you.

Practice your speech as much as possible. Rehearse in front of a mirror or with a trusted friend to refine your delivery. Remember to breathe and visualise yourself as a great speaker.

Check in with the groom and offer assistance, stay organised, be ready for unexpected changes and always have a backup plan. Try to stay calm and foster good relationships with the bridal party.

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