Etiquette Guide: Wording 'No Kids' On Wedding Invites

Planning a wedding can be stressful, especially when it comes to navigating the guest list. One of the most controversial topics in this domain is whether or not to invite children. While it is ultimately the couple's decision, it is essential to convey this information to guests in a polite and considerate manner. This paragraph aims to provide guidance on how to word no kids on wedding invitations, ensuring a smooth process for all involved.

How to politely word 'no kids' on a wedding invite

Deciding not to invite children to your wedding is perfectly valid, but it can be a sensitive issue for some guests. To politely communicate that children are not invited, careful wording is key. Here are some instructive and focused tips on how to word this on your wedding invitations:

Be Direct but Polite

It's important to be direct and clear about your adults-only policy to avoid any confusion. Simply stating "no kids" or "no children" may not be enough. Be specific about which age groups cannot attend. For example, you could say, "We respectfully request no children under the age of 16 at the reception." You can also mention that it will be an "adults-only affair" or an "adults-only reception."

Address the Invitations Properly

When addressing the invitations, only include the names of those invited. If using inner and outer envelopes, the outer envelope features the guest's mailing address, while the inner envelope includes the title and names of the invited guests. This makes it clear that only specific individuals are invited, and guests with children won't assume their whole family is welcome.

Provide Advance Notice

It's considerate to give guests with children plenty of notice so they can make childcare arrangements. Include a note on your wedding website or mention it in your save-the-dates. This way, guests have time to plan and secure childcare if needed.

Be Consistent

Apply the "no kids" rule consistently across your guest list. You can make clear exceptions for children of immediate family members, bridesmaids, ushers, page boys, or flower girls, but be sure to communicate these exceptions to other guests to avoid confusion.

Avoid Implying Children are Unwelcome

While some parents may appreciate a child-free evening, it's important not to imply that children are unwelcome. Phrases like "We thought you'd appreciate a night off!" or "To give you the opportunity to really let your hair down, we've decided not to invite children" can come across as patronising. Instead, focus on the type of event you're hosting and your desire for a child-free celebration.

Examples of Wording

• "We kindly request this be an adult-only wedding."
• "We love your children, but due to space restrictions, we cannot accommodate guests under the age of [insert number] on our wedding day."
• "The couple requests this be an adults-only event."
• "Unfortunately, we cannot host any children at our wedding. We appreciate your understanding."
• "There will be an adult-only (21+) reception to follow."
• "We politely request no children attend the ceremony and reception. Thank you in advance for your understanding."
• "We respectfully request no children under the age of 18 at the reception."
• "We respectfully advise this is an adult-only event."
• "We respectfully request that under-18s do not attend the reception."
• "We are very sorry, but due to venue restrictions, we cannot accommodate children."
• "We are unable to accommodate children, but we hope you will still be able to join us."

Wording examples for when your venue doesn't allow children

Deciding not to invite children to your wedding can be a tricky situation to navigate, but it's your big day, so it's entirely up to you! If your venue doesn't allow children, here are some ways to word it on your invitations:

• "We are very sorry, but due to restrictions at our venue, we cannot accommodate children."
• "Due to safety reasons at our venue, we are unable to extend this invitation to children."
• "Due to the nature of our venue, we are unable to invite under-18s to our wedding."
• "Our venue has a strict no-under-18s policy, so we are unable to welcome children to the wedding."
• "We are very sorry, but due to venue restrictions, we cannot accommodate children."
• "Our venue does not accommodate under-18s, so we are unable to invite children to the wedding."
• "We are looking forward to having our guests relax and enjoy an evening of celebration—our wedding will be an adult-only occasion. We politely request no children at this private, intimate event."
• "Our wedding will be an evening affair with an open bar and loud music. For the comfort and safety of all guests, we kindly request no children under 18."
• "We’re looking forward to celebrating our wedding with your children at the ceremony and cocktail hour, but request the reception be reserved for adults only."
• "We are extending a formal invitation to celebrate our marriage with your children at the reception, but only children in the bridal party should be in attendance at the ceremony."
• "We love your kids, but due to venue restrictions, we are unable to accommodate children."
• "Unfortunately, due to the venue's policy, we are unable to invite children to the wedding."

Remember, it's important to let guests with children know about your adult-only policy as soon as possible, so they can make the necessary arrangements. Good luck with your wedding planning!

What to say when you are allowing certain children

If you're allowing certain children to attend your wedding, it's important to be clear about this on your invitations to avoid any confusion. Here are some ways to word this:

Be Direct and Clear

It's best to be direct and clear about your adults-only policy, especially if you're making exceptions for certain children. Here are some examples:

• "Unfortunately, as much as we'd love to invite all of our friends' children, we can only accommodate a few close family children. We hope that you will understand this decision and that you will still be able to join us on our special day."
• "In order to meet guest number restrictions, we are only able to extend our invitation to the children of close family and/or our wedding party."
• "Due to space constraints, we are only able to invite the children of immediate family to our wedding."
• "We are unable to accommodate children beyond our page boys and flower girls."
• "We are only able to accommodate the children of the wedding party."

Keep it Simple

If you want to keep the wording simple and to the point, you could try something like:

• "We are sorry that we are unable to accommodate children at our wedding."
• "We would like our special day to be an adult-only occasion."
• "Please be aware that this will be an adults-only wedding."

Be Consistent

It's important to be consistent with your policy and make sure that all guests are aware of any exceptions. You could include a note on your wedding website or inform guests through word of mouth.

Address Invitations Carefully

When addressing your invitations, be sure to only include the names of those who are invited. This will help avoid any confusion and make it clear that only specific children are invited.

Offer Alternatives

If you're concerned about guests' children, you could offer alternatives such as recommending babysitting options in the area or providing a creche or babysitter at the wedding.

What to say when you are keeping it simple

If you want to keep your wedding a child-free event, it's important to be clear and direct with your guests. Here are some ways to politely and considerately let them know:

"We are very sorry, but we are keeping our special day as an adult-only occasion."

"We will not be able to invite children to our wedding, we hope that you will still be able to attend."

"We are sorry that we are unable to accommodate children at our wedding."

"We would like our special day to be an adult-only occasion."

"Please be aware that this will be an adults-only wedding."

"We are unable to invite children to our wedding. We hope that the advance notice means you are still able to attend."

It's also a good idea to address each invitation with the names of those you are inviting, so guests with children don't assume their whole family is welcome. You can also add a line on your RSVP card, such as "We have reserved ___ seats for you at the reception."

What to say when you are inviting children to part of the wedding

If you're inviting children to your wedding, it's important to communicate this clearly to your guests. Here are some suggestions for what to say when you are inviting children to part of the wedding:

Be Clear and Direct

It is important to be clear and direct when inviting children to your wedding. A good way to do this is by specifying which parts of the wedding children are invited to. For example, you could say something like:

> "We are delighted to welcome children to the ceremony and early reception. However, from X pm onwards, the wedding will be adults only."

Or:

> "Children outside the wedding party are not invited for the ceremony, but are welcome for the reception from X pm."

By being explicit about which parts of the wedding children are invited to, you can avoid any confusion or misunderstanding.

Address Invitations Properly

To indicate that children are invited to your wedding, be sure to include their names on the invitation. If your invitation has both an outer and inner envelope, the child's parents' names should be on the outer envelope, while the child's name should be written beneath the parents' names on the inner envelope. If a child is over 18, they should receive a separate invitation, even if they still live at home.

Make a Phone Call

In addition to sending out invitations, it's a good idea to call your guests with children to explain that your wedding is child-friendly. This is especially effective if you're worried about any misunderstandings or if you're providing childcare services. It's also a nice way to let parents know that their children will be well taken care of during the wedding.

Be Consistent

When inviting children to your wedding, it's important to be consistent. Decide on a clear rule and stick to it. For example, you may choose to only invite children from your immediate family or only allow children over a certain age. This will help to avoid any confusion or hurt feelings.

Provide Activities and Accommodations for Children

To make your wedding enjoyable for children, consider providing activities and accommodations specifically for them. This could include things like a separate kids' table or room with childcare, colouring books and crayons, puzzles, or a kids' menu with child-friendly food options.

Frequently asked questions