Calm A Bride: Tips For Bridesmaids To Ease Wedding Stress

Being a bridesmaid is a great honour, but it can also be a stressful and expensive experience. From organising hen parties to buying dresses, shoes, and gifts, the responsibilities that come with the role can start to feel like a second job. It's important to remember that you're not alone in feeling overwhelmed by wedding stress—even the bride herself is likely feeling the pressure. To reduce stress, it's crucial to communicate openly and set boundaries. Be honest about your budget and time constraints, and don't be afraid to say no if something is too much. Remember, the bride chose you to be a part of her special day because she values your friendship. By taking care of yourself and staying organised, you can ensure that you're able to fully enjoy the wedding celebrations.

Be mindful of their finances

Being a bridesmaid can be an expensive affair, and it's important to be mindful of your bridesmaids' financial situations. Here are some ways to be considerate of their finances:

Discuss expectations and costs early on:

Before making any plans, have an open and honest conversation with your bridesmaids about what they can comfortably afford. Ask them to evaluate their financial status and be transparent about the expected costs, including the dress, bachelorette party, travel, and other expenses. This will help set clear expectations and avoid any surprises later on.

Be flexible and accommodating:

If your bridesmaids have financial constraints, be willing to make adjustments. For example, suggest more affordable options for the dress or offer to cover part of the expenses if you can. Understand that they may not be able to attend every event or activity, and be open to alternative suggestions. Remember, it's important to maintain a long-term perspective and keep your friendship a priority.

Plan ahead and create a budget:

Encourage your bridesmaids to start saving early by setting aside a specific amount each month for wedding-related expenses. Help them create a budget spreadsheet to track their spending. This will ensure they don't feel overwhelmed by unexpected costs and can plan their finances effectively.

Explore cost-saving alternatives:

Work with your bridesmaids to find creative ways to save money. Suggest renting dresses or jewellery instead of buying new ones. Look for deals and discounts on travel and accommodations. Opt for more affordable options for the bachelorette party or bridal shower, such as a local night out or a high tea instead of an extravagant trip.

Communicate and offer alternatives:

If a bridesmaid is unable to participate in certain events due to financial reasons, encourage open communication. Ask them to share their concerns and offer alternative suggestions. For example, if they can't attend a destination bachelorette party, suggest a local get-together or a virtual celebration instead.

Remember, it's important to be mindful of your bridesmaids' financial situations and to find a balance between celebrating your special day and respecting their financial boundaries. Open communication and flexibility will go a long way in ensuring everyone feels valued and included.

Respect their time

Being a bridesmaid is a huge honour, but it can also be a big commitment. To ensure you're respecting your bridesmaids' time, it's important to be mindful of their schedules and avoid overloading them with tasks. Here are some tips to help you respect your bridesmaids' time during the wedding planning process:

Communicate expectations clearly and early

It's important to have honest conversations about expectations from the start. Be clear about what you expect from your bridesmaids in terms of time and financial commitments. This will help them plan and ensure they don't feel overwhelmed. It's also crucial to respect their budgets and be understanding if they can't take on certain expenses.

Provide a timeline and deadlines

Create a timeline for wedding-related tasks and share it with your bridesmaids. This will help them plan their time effectively and ensure they're not caught off guard by last-minute requests. It's also helpful to set deadlines for tasks to avoid a buildup of tasks and stress closer to the wedding.

Be mindful of their schedules

When planning meetings or events, be mindful of your bridesmaids' schedules. Avoid overloading them with frequent or last-minute meetings. Respect their time by being organised and efficient during these gatherings. Remember, they have lives and commitments outside of your wedding, so try to be flexible and accommodating.

Delegate tasks according to their skills and interests

Not all bridesmaids will have the same amount of time or interest in certain tasks. Get to know their skills, strengths, and interests, and delegate tasks accordingly. This will not only show that you respect their time but also make the experience more enjoyable for them.

Avoid overloading them with too many tasks

While bridesmaids are there to support you, avoid treating them as personal assistants. Be mindful of how many tasks you delegate and the time required for each. If possible, group similar tasks together to make better use of their time. For example, instead of asking them to accompany you to multiple dress fittings, ask for their presence at the final fitting to provide their opinion.

Be understanding if they need to decline certain commitments

Understand that your bridesmaids have their own lives, commitments, and priorities. If they need to decline certain wedding-related events or tasks due to time or financial constraints, try to be understanding. Remember, they are doing their best to support you, and their presence on your special day is what truly matters.

Respecting your bridesmaids' time is crucial to maintaining healthy relationships and ensuring they feel valued during the wedding planning process. Open communication, clear expectations, and thoughtful planning will go a long way in showing your appreciation for their time and efforts.

Be flexible with dress choices

Being flexible with your bridesmaids' dress choices can help to alleviate some of the financial strain and stress of wedding planning. It is expensive to be a bridesmaid, and costs can quickly escalate, especially if the wedding is abroad.

As the bride, you can be flexible by allowing your bridesmaids to choose their own dress silhouettes, sleeve length, or necklines. This gives them the opportunity to select a style that flatters their body type and that they feel comfortable in.

You can also be flexible by subsidizing the difference if some bridesmaids cannot afford the dress you have chosen. Alternatively, you can limit your choices to dresses within a certain price range, of which there are often hundreds of gorgeous options.

Being flexible with dress choices can also mean being clear and specific about any guidelines you have, such as the color, length, or material of the dress. This will make the dress hunt easier for your bridesmaids and help to avoid any last-minute surprises or stress.

Remember, it is customary for bridesmaids to cover the cost of their own dresses, so having open and honest conversations about budgets is essential.

Communicate early and often

Communicating early and often with your bridesmaids is key to minimising stress and ensuring everyone is happy. Here are some tips to achieve this:

Start with a Group Chat

Creating a group chat with all the bridesmaids is a great way to facilitate open communication from the beginning. This is especially helpful if your bridesmaids live in different states or countries. A group chat allows everyone to introduce themselves, get to know each other, and start coordinating.

Provide Important Dates in Advance

Give your bridesmaids the dates for all the relevant events, including the engagement party, bridal shower, rehearsal dinner, and, of course, the wedding day itself. This will enable them to plan their time and finances effectively. It is also helpful to provide details about the bridesmaid dress shopping/ordering process and any plans for the bachelorette party.

Be Upfront About Time and Money Commitments

Be transparent about the expected time and financial commitments. Discuss the costs of the dress, bachelorette party, and wedding gift. Think of ways to reduce their expenses, such as renting dresses or choosing affordable alternatives. Be mindful of their schedules and avoid overloading them with excessive events and tasks. Respect their time by keeping your communications concise and to the point.

Keep Them Well-Informed

Share details about the wedding theme, colour palette, and any specific requirements. For example, if you want them to wear a particular style or colour of shoes, let them know in advance. This will help them feel more prepared and reduce uncertainty.

Check in Regularly

Communication should be a two-way street. Encourage your bridesmaids to voice their concerns, preferences, and ideas. Be open to feedback and willing to make adjustments if necessary. Regular check-ins can also help you gauge their stress levels and adjust your expectations or provide additional support.

Remember, early and frequent communication will help ensure your bridesmaids feel valued, appreciated, and informed throughout the entire process.

Be a calm, cool, and collected bride

It's your big day, but it's important to remember that your bridesmaids have their own lives, jobs, and responsibilities. While wedding planning can be all-consuming for you, it needn't be for your bridesmaids. Here are some tips to keep yourself and your bridesmaids happy and stress-free:

Communicate early and often

Give your bridesmaids all the dates and details they need to know as soon as possible. This includes dates for dress shopping, the bridal shower, rehearsal dinner, bachelorette party, and, of course, the wedding day. Being well-informed will help your bridesmaids feel more relaxed and prepared.

Keep budgets in mind

Being a bridesmaid can be expensive, so be mindful of your bridesmaids' financial situations. Think of ways to cut costs, such as renting dresses instead of buying or giving them their wedding-day jewelry as a gift. Only plan events that everyone can afford to attend, and be open to discussing financial concerns and wiggle room.

Respect their time

Your bridesmaids have their own lives, so try not to expect them to put everything on pause for your wedding. Keep your communications concise and to the point. Avoid sending lengthy emails or obnoxious group texts that demand their time and attention.

Choose flattering dresses or let them pick their own

Remember that one size or style doesn't fit all. Consider taking advantage of the mix-and-match trend and give your bridesmaids a color palette and style to choose their own outfits from. This will make them feel more comfortable and they'll appreciate the flexibility.

Let them choose their hair, makeup, and shoes

Allowing your bridesmaids to choose their own hair and makeup styles will make them feel more comfortable and fabulous. If you want them to use a professional, be sure to cover the costs. Similarly, let them choose their own shoes, perhaps sticking to a specific color for uniformity.

Be a Bridechilla

The best gift you can give your bridesmaids is to be a calm, cool, and collected bride. Treat them as adults, be reasonable, and respectful. Make a pact with your bridesmaids to keep the drama to a minimum, and remember to have fun!

Frequently asked questions