Knowing how to respond to a formal wedding invitation is an important skill to have. After all, you don't want to offend your hosts or cause them unnecessary stress. The first duty of a guest is to respond promptly, so check your schedule and decide whether you can attend. If the invitation includes an RSVP, respond using the method requested by the host, whether that's by post, email, or wedding website. A formal response should be written in the third person and follow the wording of the invitation. For example, Mr and Mrs Harold McGowan accept with pleasure your kind invitation for Saturday, the nineteenth of June. If you are unable to attend, it is courteous to let the hosts know as soon as possible so they can invite someone else if they wish.
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Tone | Formal and cordial |
Response Time | Prompt |
Content | Gratitude for the invitation; clear confirmation of attendance or not; names of attendees |
Format | Third-person, formal; split acceptance/regret; informal personal |
Channel | Email, handwritten letter, WhatsApp, etc. |
What You'll Learn
How to respond cordially
When responding cordially to a formal wedding invitation, it is important to follow traditional etiquette, expressing gratitude for the invitation and clearly stating whether or not you will be attending. Here are some guidelines and examples to help you craft a thoughtful and polite response:
Promptness is Key: It is courteous to respond to a wedding invitation promptly. The couple will appreciate an early response as it helps them with their planning, especially if they need to adjust their guest list or inform caterers.
Formal Wording: For a formal response, it is customary to write in the third person, mirroring the wording of the invitation. Here is an example:
> Mr. and Mrs. [Your Surname] accept with pleasure [or regret that they are unable to accept] your kind invitation for [date of the wedding].
Addressing the Couple Directly: If you have a close relationship with the couple, you may prefer a more personal approach. Your response should still be formal but can include a brief, sincere message. Here is an example:
> Dear [Couple's Names],
>
> We are delighted to accept your invitation to your wedding on [date]. We look forward to celebrating this special day with you.
>
> Warm regards,
> [Your Names]
Bringing a Guest: If the invitation includes the phrase "and guest," let the host know if you intend to bring someone. Do not assume you can bring a guest if the invitation is addressed only to you.
Informing Your Regrets: If you are unable to attend, express your regrets politely and consider sending a thoughtful message or gift to the couple to let them know they are in your thoughts on their special day. Here is an example:
> Dear [Couple's Names],
>
> Thank you so much for inviting us to your wedding. Unfortunately, we will not be able to attend, but we wish you all the best for your special day. We hope to celebrate with you when you return from your honeymoon!
>
> With regrets,
> [Your Names]
Additional Considerations:
- If the invitation includes an RSVP card, follow the instructions provided.
- If there is no specified method of response, you can reply in writing or by email.
- If you need to decline after initially accepting, inform the couple immediately.
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Responding to an invitation for you and a plus one
When responding to a formal wedding invitation for you and a plus one, it's important to express your gratitude and clearly indicate your attendance. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft your response:
Respond Promptly
It is courteous to respond to a wedding invitation as soon as possible. This allows the couple to make any necessary arrangements and adjustments, especially if they are offering a "plus one" option. Check your schedule, consult with your plus one, and respond in a timely manner.
Formal Response via Mail
If you received a formal invitation by mail, it is customary to respond in a similar manner. Use nice stationery and a good pen to write your response. Here is an example of a highly formal and traditional response:
> Mr. and Mrs. [Your Last Name] accept with pleasure the kind invitation of Mr. and Mrs. [Host's Last Name] to the wedding reception of their daughter [Bride's Name] and [Groom's Name] on [Date] at [Time].
If the invitation is from the couple themselves, address them directly:
> Dear [Couple's Names],
> [Plus One's Name] and I are delighted to accept your kind invitation to your wedding on [Date]. We are looking forward to celebrating this special day with you.
> Kind regards,
> [Your Name] and [Plus One's Name]
Informal Response
If the invitation is more informal, you can personalize your response and add a touch of enthusiasm. Here is an example:
> Hi [Couple's Names]! [Plus One's Name] and I are thrilled to be a part of your special day. We can't wait to celebrate with you and are looking forward to all the wonderful moments ahead. See you soon!
> Best wishes,
> [Your Name] and [Plus One's Name]
Confirming Your "Plus One"
When filling out an RSVP card or responding by mail, be sure to specify that you are bringing a plus one and include their name. This helps the couple with their planning and ensures there is adequate space and accommodation for all guests.
Declining the Invitation
If you are unable to attend, it is polite to inform the couple promptly. You can send a brief response expressing your regret and well wishes:
> Dear [Couple's Names],
> Thank you for the kind invitation. Unfortunately, [Plus One's Name] and I are unable to attend your wedding on [Date]. We wish you all the best and hope you have a wonderful celebration.
> Kind regards,
> [Your Name] and [Plus One's Name]
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Wording for a formal response
A formal reply to a wedding invitation should follow traditional etiquette and be written in a formal and cordial tone. It is important to respond promptly to any wedding invitation, first by checking your schedule and then confirming your attendance or regrets as soon as possible. Here is some wording for a formal response:
"Mr. and Mrs. [Your Last Name] accept with pleasure [or regret that they are unable to accept] your kind invitation for [date of the wedding]."
"Mr. and Mrs. [Your Last Name] accept with pleasure the kind invitation of Mr. and Mrs. [Host's Last Name] to the wedding reception of their daughter [Name] and [Name or Mr.] [Name] on [date of the wedding]."
If you have been invited with a "plus one," and you decide to bring someone, be sure to let the host know. You can also add a personal note to your response, expressing your gratitude and well wishes for the couple:
"We are super excited to attend your wedding and celebrate this special day with you. Thank you for including us in your celebration."
"I am honoured by your invitation and delighted to accept. Congratulations to you both, and I wish you all the best for your future together."
If you are unable to attend, it is considerate to send your regrets and a thoughtful message:
"Thank you for your kind invitation. Unfortunately, I will be unable to attend. Please know that I will be thinking of you on your special day and wishing you every happiness."
"I am so sorry that I cannot be there to celebrate with you. I will be away on business, but you will be in my thoughts. Congratulations and all my love to you both."
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Informal responses for close friends
When responding to a formal wedding invitation, it is important to respond promptly, expressing gratitude for the invitation and clearly stating whether or not you will be attending. While formal responses are typically written in the third person, following the wording of the invitation, informal responses to close friends can take a more casual and heartfelt tone. Here are some ideas for informal responses to a formal wedding invitation for close friends:
"We are thrilled to be able to share your special day with you! We can't wait to celebrate your love and new life together as a married couple. See you soon!"
"Thank you for inviting us to your wedding! We are so happy for you both and are looking forward to celebrating with you. It will be a day to remember!"
"We are so excited to attend your wedding and watch you both say 'I do'! Your love and commitment to each other are inspiring, and we can't wait to cheer you on as you embark on this new chapter. See you at the altar!"
"It's an honour to be invited to your wedding, and we are delighted to accept. We wish you both all the best and look forward to making more memories with you as a married couple!"
"Your wedding invitation brought me so much joy! I can't wait to celebrate with you and your partner on your special day. Congratulations, and see you soon!"
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When to send a telegram
Telegrams are a nostalgic and unique way to send your best wishes to the happy couple on their wedding day. If you want to send a telegram, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, they are usually sent by close friends or family members of the couple. Secondly, it is important to send the telegram in time for it to be read out at the wedding reception, traditionally by the best man or a groomsman, after the last speech.
So, when is the best time to send a telegram? It is recommended that you send your telegram at least five business days before the wedding to ensure it arrives on time. The delivery timings will depend on the service you choose. For example, if you opt for a UK-based telegram delivery service, they offer next-day delivery with a cut-off time of 4 pm Monday to Friday. They also provide guaranteed next-day, same-day, and two-hour delivery options with a cut-off time of 6 pm Monday to Saturday.
To ensure your telegram is read out at the wedding, address it to the best man or maid of honour. If you don't know their names, send it to the bride or groom with a note at the top of the address block, saying "PASS TO BEST MAN BEFORE WEDDING".
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Frequently asked questions
A formal wedding invitation requires a response that is both formal and cordial. It should express your gratitude for being invited and clearly state whether or not you will be attending.
For a formal acceptance, write in the third person, mirroring the wording of the invitation. For example:
> [Your names] accept with pleasure your kind invitation for [date].
If you are unable to attend, you should still respond promptly. Express your gratitude for the invitation and your regret at not being able to be there. For example:
> Thank you for the invitation. Unfortunately, I will not be able to attend.
If the invitation includes a plus one, let the host know if you intend to bring someone. Only replying for yourself and then arriving with a date would be considered rude.