Writing Wedding Invites: Church Ceremony Edition

Writing a wedding invitation can be a tricky task, especially when it comes to a church ceremony. There are a few key elements to include, such as the host names, a warm invitation sentence, the couple's names, the date and time of the wedding, and the location of the ceremony and reception. Here are some tips to guide you through the process:

- Host Names: Traditionally, the bride's parents are the hosts and are named at the top of the invitation. However, including both sets of parents as hosts is a gracious option, especially if they are contributing financially. If the couple is hosting, you can omit the host line or use a welcoming introduction.

- Invitation Sentence: This is where you extend a warm invitation to your guests, setting the tone for your celebration. You can use phrases like request the pleasure of your company or invite you to celebrate with them.

- Couple's Names: Traditionally, the bride's name precedes the groom's name. For same-sex couples, you can choose the order that feels right.

- Date and Time: In formal invitations, the date and time are usually spelled out in full. For modern invites, numerical figures are often used.

- Location: Include the name and full address of the ceremony venue, followed by the reception details if it is at a different location.

Mr & Mrs John Smith request the pleasure of [guest name/your company] at the marriage of their daughter Jessica to Mr Edward Jones

[location] [date] [time]

and afterwards at [reception]

R.S.V.P by 30th June to [parent’s address]

Remember to proofread your invitations carefully and consider including a separate RSVP card or instructions for a digital response.

Host names and how to format them

The host line is the first part of a wedding invitation and figuring out who the hosts are is important when it comes to formatting. Traditionally, the bride's parents are the hosts and their names come first. However, nowadays, the couple and both sets of parents may also host together. If the couple is hosting themselves, the host line can be skipped altogether.

One Set of Married Parents Hosting

Include the parents' full names, with middle names included for very formal weddings. If they have different last names, write "and" to join the two names.

• Mr. and Mrs. Christopher Timothy Williams (very formal)
• Mr. and Mrs. Christopher Williams (formal)
• Mr. and Mrs. Christopher and Sarah Williams (formal; includes both first names)
• Christopher and Sarah Williams (less formal)

One Set of Divorced Parents Hosting

List the mother's name first, followed by the father's name on a separate line. Do not use "and" to connect the two names.

Both Sets of Parents Hosting

For different-sex couples, list the bride's parents' names first, followed by the groom's parents' names. For same-sex couples, list the names according to preference or in the order that looks best with the invitation design.

• Mr. and Mrs. Aaron Wong and Mr. and Mrs. Adam Hollis (formal)
• Aaron and Alisha Wong together with Adam and Beatrice Hollis (less formal)

Couple Hosting With Their Families

When the couple and both their families are contributing, a line such as "Together with their families" can be added as the host line.

• Together with their families
• Together with our families
• Together with their parents

Couple Hosting

If the couple is hosting the wedding themselves, the host line can be skipped or replaced with a warm and welcoming introduction, such as:

• Together with full hearts
• With hearts full of love and joy

The couple's names and whose name should go first

The names of the couple are an essential element of a wedding invitation. Traditionally, the bride's name comes first, followed by the groom's full name. This is because the bride's parents are typically the hosts and pay for the wedding. However, this tradition is not set in stone, and many couples choose to break with it.

For same-sex couples, there is no established tradition, and you have a few options for how to order the names. You could use alphabetical order, or you could go with what sounds best or what the couple is usually known as to friends and family.

If the bride's parents are hosting, their names should be at the top of the invitation, followed by the bride's name and then the groom's. If both sets of parents are hosting, the bride's parents' names should be listed first, followed by the groom's parents, and then the couple's names.

If the couple is hosting the wedding themselves, you can skip the host line or start with a warm and welcoming introduction, such as "Together with full hearts" or "With hearts full of love and joy".

The date and time of the wedding

When it comes to the date and time of your wedding, there are a few things to consider to ensure your guests know exactly when and where to arrive.

Firstly, the date and time should be written out in full. For example, if your wedding is on the 15th of September 2024 at 4:30 p.m., the wording should be: "Saturday, the fifteenth of September, two thousand twenty-four, at half after four in the afternoon." The day of the week and the month should be capitalised, and there should be no "and" when spelling out the year.

The time of day should be written as "four o'clock" or "half after four o'clock". Evening begins at five o'clock, and from noon until four o'clock is considered the afternoon.

If you are having a more informal wedding, you can write the date and time more casually, for example: "Saturday, Sept 15, 2024, 4:30 p.m." or "Saturday, 15th September 2024, 4.30 p.m."

If your wedding is taking place at 8, 9 or 10 o'clock, it is worth specifying whether it is morning or evening to avoid confusion.

If your wedding reception is at a different location or several hours after the ceremony, it is best to include a separate reception card with your invitation.

The location of the ceremony and reception

Providing Clear Details

Clearly state the name and full address of your wedding venue(s). If the ceremony and reception are at the same location, you can simply write "Reception to follow" or "Dinner and dancing to follow." Using phrases like "in the morning" or "in the evening" is not recommended as they may cause confusion. Instead, specify the time using phrases like "half after four o'clock" or "four-thirty in the afternoon." If the reception is at a different venue, include its full address on a separate line or on a reception card enclosed with the invitation.

• "The Ritz-Carlton, 123 Main Street, Anytown, USA"
• "Glochester Catholic Church, Dublin, Ireland. Reception to follow at The Westin Hotel, 456 Park Lane"

Including Other Relevant Information

If your wedding has a theme or specific dress code, you may want to include this information on the invitation. This can be mentioned in the lower corner or bottom centre of the invite. You could also include a separate details card with this information, or direct guests to your wedding website.

Some examples of how to word this are:

• "Black-tie required"
• "Cocktail attire suggested"
• "Garden party theme – dress accordingly!"

Handling Multiple Venues

If you have additional events like an after-party or the ceremony and reception are in separate locations, you have a few options. If the events are on the same day, you can include the details beneath the reception information. For events on different days, such as a welcome party or farewell brunch, include a separate details card outlining the full timeline of events.

"Ceremony: St. Patrick's Cathedral, 678 Cathedral Lane, Anytown, USA

Reception: The Country Club, 910 Golf Course Road, Anytown, USA"

Remember to be concise and clear in your wording, providing guests with all the essential details they need to know.

How to request an RSVP

When it comes to your wedding invitations, it's important to give your guests a clear way to RSVP. Here are some tips and suggestions on how to do this effectively:

Set a Clear Deadline

It's important to give your guests a deadline for RSVPs, ideally about one month before the wedding date. This will help you finalise numbers with your vendors and ensure a smooth planning process. For a destination wedding, it's a good idea to give guests a little more time, so aim for RSVPs to be returned about two months before the wedding.

Provide Multiple RSVP Options

You can include a separate RSVP card with your invitation, or provide the details on your wedding website. If you go for the latter, it's still a good idea to include a small card inside the envelope with the website address and RSVP deadline. This is also a good option if you want to cut down on the amount of incoming mail. You could also include your phone number or email address as an additional RSVP option, especially for older relatives who may not be comfortable with online RSVPs.

What to Include on the RSVP Card

The RSVP card should include the following:

• A blank line for guests to write their names, with an "M" at the start to indicate their honorific (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss).
• A clear RSVP deadline.
• A way for guests to indicate whether they will attend or not, with space to include any plus-ones.
• Space for guests to indicate their entrée and dessert preferences, if applicable.
• Any other additional information, such as the dress code or your contact details.

Encourage Creativity

You can also encourage your guests to get creative by leaving some blank space on the RSVP card for them to share their thoughts and well-wishes. This could be in the form of a song request, date ideas, advice for the newlyweds, or simply a space for them to express their excitement for your big day.

A Friendly Reminder

Don't be afraid to give your guests a gentle reminder if the RSVP date is approaching and you haven't heard from them. It's easy for people to forget, so a quick call or email can be a helpful nudge.

Remember, the most important thing is to give your guests a clear and convenient way to RSVP so that you can finalise your guest list and plan your wedding day accordingly.

Frequently asked questions