Phrasing Wedding Invitations: The Art Of Warm Welcoming

Wedding invitation wording can be a tricky task, but it's an important piece of the planning puzzle as it's one of the first things your guests will see. The good news is that the rules of wedding invitation etiquette are not that complicated. The primary tenet is actually much simpler and more straightforward than you may think. The most important rule is to create a beautiful wedding invitation that represents you, your love, and the big day to come, while also communicating the vital details of the wedding.

The first line of your wedding invitations is dedicated to the host of the wedding, also known as the party covering the expenses. Traditionally, the bride's parents pay for the wedding, but nowadays the groom's parents, bride, groom, or a combination of all three may contribute. There is no official order or requirement to list the names and it's all up to personal preference.

The next line is the request line, where you invite your guests to join your wedding celebration. Traditionally, couples use formal wording to denote a formal religious ceremony, whereas modern celebrations tend to use more casual language.

After this, you should include the couple's names, the date, time, and location of the ceremony, and finish the wedding invite with the reception details line.

Who to include in the host line

The host line is the opening line on a wedding invitation and traditionally names the people hosting the wedding. If the wedding is hosted by the bride's parents, their names are listed first. However, it has become increasingly common to include both sets of parents as hosts, regardless of who is footing the bill. Here are some examples of how to phrase the host line for different scenarios:

One Set of Married Parents Hosting

Include the parents' full names, with middle names included for very formal weddings. If they have different last names, write "and" to join the two names.

• Mr. and Mrs. Christopher Timothy Williams (very formal; the middle name is included)
• Mr. and Mrs. Christopher Williams (formal)
• Mr. and Mrs. Christopher and Sarah Williams (formal; includes both first names)
• Christopher and Sarah Williams (less formal)

One Set of Divorced Parents Hosting

List the mother's name first, followed by the father's name on a separate line. Do not use "and" to connect the two names.

Both Sets of Parents Hosting

For different-sex couples, list the bride's parents' names first, followed by the groom's parents' names. For same-sex couples, list the names according to preference or in the order that looks best with the invitation design.

• Mr. and Mrs. Aaron Wong and Mr. and Mrs. Adam Hollis (formal)
• Aaron and Alisha Wong together with Adam and Beatrice Hollis (less formal)

Couple Hosting with Their Families

When the couple and both of their families are contributing to the cost of the wedding, you can add a line such as:

• Together with their families
• Together with our families
• Together with their parents

Couple Hosting Themselves

If the couple is hosting the wedding themselves, you can skip the host line or start the invitation with a warm and welcoming introduction, such as:

• Together with full hearts
• With hearts full of love and joy

How to word the request to attend

The request line is where you extend an invitation to your wedding celebration. This is where you can set the tone for your celebration. Here are some examples of wording for the request line:

• "Request the honour of your presence" (traditionally used to denote a religious service)
• "Request the pleasure of your company" (used to denote a non-religious ceremony)
• "Invite you to celebrate with them"
• "Would love for you to join them"

If you are having a formal wedding, you may want to use more traditional wording, such as "request the honour of your presence". If you are having a more casual or modern wedding, you may want to use more informal language, such as "invite you to celebrate with them".

You can also add a personal touch to the request line to make it more meaningful. For example, you could say something like "We would be honoured by your presence at our wedding" or "We would love for you to join us as we exchange our vows".

• "Together with their families, [couple's names] invite you to share in their joy as they exchange wedding vows"
• "With joyful hearts, [couple's names] request your presence at their wedding"
• "The pleasure of your company is requested at the marriage of [couple's names]"
• "You are cordially invited to attend the wedding of [couple's names]"

Where to place the couple's names

When addressing wedding invitations, there are a few different approaches you can take depending on the couple's last names and their marital status. Here are some detailed guidelines on where to place the couple's names:

Married Couple with the Same Last Name:

For a heterosexual couple, the outer envelope can be addressed as "Mr. and Mrs. [Husband's First Name] [Shared Last Name]. If the couple prefers to include the wife's name, it can be written as "Mr. [Husband's First Name] [Shared Last Name] and Mrs. [Wife's First Name] [Shared Last Name]." On the inner envelope, you can simply write their first names, such as " [Husband's First Name] and [Wife's First Name]."

Married Couple with Different Last Names:

When the couple has different last names, their names are written on the same line, with the woman's name first. For example, the outer envelope can be addressed as "Ms. [Wife's First Name] [Wife's Last Name] and Mr. [Husband's First Name] [Husband's Last Name]." On the inner envelope, you can refer to them as " [Wife's First Name] and [Husband's First Name]."

Married Couple with One Hyphenated Last Name:

If one spouse has chosen to hyphenate their last name, the outer envelope can be addressed as "Mr. [Husband's First Name] [Husband's Last Name] and Mr. [Wife's First Name] [Wife's Hyphenated Last Name]." On the inner envelope, you can use their first names, such as " [Husband's First Name] and [Wife's First Name]."

Unmarried Couple:

For an unmarried couple living at the same address, their names are written on separate lines. List the person you are closest to first. The outer envelope can be addressed as "Mr. [Person 1's First Name] [Person 1's Last Name] and Ms. [Person 2's First Name] [Person 2's Last Name]." On the inner envelope, you can use their first names, such as " [Person 1's First Name] and [Person 2's First Name]."

Remember, these are just guidelines, and you can adjust them based on your relationship with the couple and the level of formality you prefer.

How to format the date and time

The date and time are essential elements of your wedding invitation. Here is a detailed guide on how to format them:

Traditional Format

The traditional way to write the date and time on a wedding invitation is to spell out everything in full, avoiding numerals. For example, if your wedding is on Saturday, October 26, 2024, at 3:30 pm, the wording could be:

> Saturday, the twenty-sixth of October, two thousand twenty-four, at half after three o'clock

• The day of the week is capitalized (Saturday).
• There is a comma between the day of the week and the date.
• For dates from the 21st to the 31st of a month, use a hyphen between the tens and ones place (twenty-sixth).
• The month is capitalized and written in full (October).
• The year is usually on a separate line, in lowercase, and without commas or hyphens (two thousand twenty-four).
• The time of day is spelled out as "three o'clock" or "half after three o'clock." Avoid using "half past."
• You don't need to specify "in the morning," "in the afternoon," or "in the evening" unless there could be confusion. For example, for a wedding at 8 am or 9 am, you might want to specify the time of day.
• Noon can simply be written as "noon."

Informal Format

If you're having a more casual wedding, you can use a more informal format for the date and time. For example, for a wedding on Sunday, May 17, 2025, at 4:30 pm, you could write:

> Sunday, May 17, 2025, at 4:30 pm

• You can use numerals for the date and time, such as "5/17/2025" or "4:30 pm."
• You can write out the month instead of using numerals, such as "May 17, 2025."
• Be consistent with the format you choose throughout the invitation and any enclosures, such as the response card.

Matching Formality

It's important to match the formality of the date and time with the overall style of your wedding invitation. If you're having a formal wedding, stick to the traditional format. If your wedding is more casual, you can be more flexible and use numerals or a mix of written-out numbers and numerals.

Consistency and Readability

Whatever format you choose, ensure that your invitation is easy to read and that you maintain consistency throughout. Work with a stationer to find the best layout and wording for your invitations.

What to include about the location

When it comes to wedding invitations, the location is a very important element to include. Here are some tips and suggestions on what to include about the location:

Providing Clear and Accurate Information

It is crucial to provide clear and accurate information about the ceremony and reception locations. Include the name and full address of the venue, including the city, state, and zip code. If your wedding is taking place abroad, don't forget to mention the country as well. The street address is usually not needed unless omitting it may cause confusion or if the wedding is held at a private residence.

Formatting and Wording

For formal weddings, write out the date and time in full. For example, "Saturday, the fifteenth of September, two thousand twenty-four, at half after four in the afternoon." The day of the week and the month should be capitalised, and the year should be in lowercase. As for the time of day, spell it out as "four o'clock" or "half after four o'clock."

Reception Information

If your ceremony and reception are at the same venue, phrases like "reception to follow" or "dinner and dancing to follow" are perfectly acceptable. However, if the reception is at a different location, include the full address and other relevant information. If the reception is not immediately following the ceremony, be sure to include the start time.

Maps and Directions

Consider including an insert card with extra information about the venue, especially if your wedding is in a unique or unfamiliar location. Instructions regarding parking, custom maps, and local area attractions can be incredibly helpful for your guests.

Website Details

Your wedding website is a great resource for sharing additional venue and travel details. Be sure to include the website address on a separate insert card or reception card.

Dress Code

Including the dress code on the invitation is optional, but if you choose to do so, place it in the lower right-hand corner. If no dress code is specified, guests will usually infer the expected attire based on the formality of the invitation itself.

Remember, the key is to provide clear and concise information about the location to ensure your guests can easily find their way to your special day!

Frequently asked questions