Honoring Deceased Parents: Wedding Invitation Etiquette

Wedding invitation wording can be tricky, especially when it comes to honouring a deceased parent. While some sources advise against including the names of parents who have passed away, others suggest ways to include them. For instance, the invitation can be issued by the couple and read: Together with their families, [couple's names] request the honour of your presence at their marriage. This acknowledges both sets of parents without implying that the deceased parent is issuing the invitation.

Wording for the bride's deceased parent

There are several ways to mention a bride's deceased parent in a wedding invitation while keeping the tone formal and traditional. Here are some examples:

For a traditional wedding, the invitation can be worded as follows:

> The honour of your presence is requested at the marriage of Jennifer Drake, daughter of John Drake and the late Barbara Drake, to Brian Connors, son of Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Connors, on [date] at [time] in [venue and location].

A less formal version of this could be:

> Together with their families, Jennifer Drake, daughter of John Drake and the late Barbara Drake, and Brian Connors, son of Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Connors, request the honour of your presence at their marriage on [date] at [time] in [venue and location].

If the bride's father is deceased, the invitation could be worded as follows:

> Mrs. Sharon Henderson and the late Mr. Nathan Henderson request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter Preston John Brackman on Saturday, the twenty-first of July Two-thousand and twenty-six at six o'clock in the evening in Dripping Springs, Texas.

For a same-sex wedding, the wording can be adjusted as such:

> And the late Mr. Jim Hanson, son of Mr. and Mrs. Brady Aster, request the honour of your presence on Saturday, the twenty-first of July Two-thousand and twenty-six at six o'clock in the evening in Palo Alto, California.

In addition to the invitation, some brides choose to honour a deceased parent through other means, such as a loving tribute in the wedding program, a poem or reading recited in their memory, or a meaningful song played at the reception.

Wording for the groom's deceased parent

It is understandable that you want to honour your deceased parent at your wedding. Here are some suggestions for how to word your wedding invitations to include your late parent:

Traditional Wording

If you are opting for traditional wording, the invitation can be issued by the couple and read:

> Together with their families, [Bride], daughter of [Father's name] and the late [Mother's name], and [Groom], son of [Father's name] and [Mother's name], request the honour of your presence at their marriage...

Or, if the bride's parents are hosting:

> Mr. and Mrs. [Bride's parents] request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter, [Bride], to [Groom], son of [Father's name] and the late [Mother's name]...

Less Formal Wording

For a less formal approach, you can include the late parent's name after the couple's names:

> [Bride] and [Groom], son of [Father's name] and the late [Mother's name], invite you to their wedding...

Or, if you would like to include the groom's mother's name:

> [Bride] and [Groom], son of [Mother's name] and the late [Father's name], invite you to their wedding...

Other Ways to Honour the Deceased

If you decide not to include your late parent on the invitation, there are other ways to honour them on your wedding day. Many couples choose to acknowledge a deceased parent with a loving tribute in the wedding program, a poem or reading recited in their memory, or a meaningful song played at the reception.

Including a deceased parent without using the word 'late'

There are several ways to include a deceased parent in a wedding invitation without using the word "late". Here are some options:

Option 1:

Use the phrase "Together with their families" to indicate that both the bride and groom's families are included, without specifically mentioning the deceased parent. This option is especially useful if there are multiple family members to consider or if you prefer a simpler approach.

Option 2:

List the names of the bride and groom's parents, including the deceased parent, without any indication of their passing. This approach may be suitable if the deceased parent passed away recently or if the surviving parent has not remarried. Here is an example:

> [Engaged Person's Name]

>

> child of [Parent's Name] and [Parent's Name]

>

> [Engaged Person's Name]

>

> child of [Parent's Name] and [Parent's Name]

>

> request the honor of your presence at their marriage.

Option 3:

Mention the deceased parent in a more subtle way, such as by using a small cross next to their name on the invitation. This option allows you to include the parent without explicitly stating that they have passed away.

Option 4:

Use a phrase such as "In loving memory of" or "In honour of" followed by the deceased parent's name. This approach allows you to explicitly honour the memory of the deceased parent without using the word "late". For example:

> In loving memory of [Parent's Name] and with the support of their families, [Engaged Person's Name] and [Engaged Person's Name] request the honour of your presence at their marriage.

Remember, it is essential to consider the format and etiquette of wedding invitations when including a deceased parent. The invitation should not appear to be sent by the deceased parent, and you may want to include other surviving family members as well. You can also choose to honour the deceased parent during the wedding ceremony or reception through poems, songs, or other meaningful gestures.

Etiquette for including a deceased parent

Including a deceased parent on your wedding invitation is a wonderful way to honour their memory and acknowledge their importance to you. Here are some guidelines and examples to help you navigate this sensitive topic with care and respect:

Traditional Wording

If you prefer traditional wedding invitation wording, you can include your deceased parent's name alongside your living parent. For example:

> The honour of your presence is requested at the marriage of Jennifer Drake, daughter of John Drake and the late Barbara Drake, to Brian Connors, son of Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Connors.

Here, the invitation is issued by the couple, and the names of their parents, including the deceased mother, are mentioned as their parents. This option allows you to include your deceased parent without implying that they are sending the invitation.

Modern Wording

For a more modern approach, you can use wording that reflects the involvement of both families:

> Together with their families, Jennifer Drake, daughter of John Drake and the late Barbara Drake, and Brian Connors, son of Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Connors, request the honour of your presence at their marriage.

In this example, both families are included, and the invitation is issued by the couple and their families. This phrasing allows for the mention of a deceased parent without implying that they are hosting the event.

Honouring Multiple Deceased Relatives

If you have multiple deceased relatives you wish to honour, you can include them all in the invitation. Here is an example provided by BridalGuide:

> Mr. David Smith and Ms. Susan Jones, and Mr. and Mrs. Joseph Smith (grandparents) request the honour of your presence at the marriage of Andrea Wynnfield, daughter of the late Mrs. Ann Blake and Mr. John Blake and the late Mr. Eric Wynnfield, to Robert Joseph Smith.

Step-parents and Biological Parents

If you have a step-parent and wish to include your biological parent who has passed away, here is an example of how to word your invitation:

> Moira and Alistair Schiller request the honour of your presence at the marriage of her and the late Porter Blackman's daughter on Saturday, the twenty-first of July, two thousand and twenty-six, at six o'clock in the evening.

Alternative Ways to Honour Deceased Parents

If you prefer not to include your deceased parent on the invitation itself, there are other meaningful ways to honour them during your wedding. Consider including a loving tribute in your wedding program, reciting a poem or reading in their memory, or playing their favourite song at the reception. These gestures will be appreciated by your family members and guests alike.

Alternatives to mentioning a deceased parent on the invitation

If you don't want to mention a deceased parent on your wedding invitation, there are several other ways to honour them during your wedding. Here are some ideas:

• Memorial candle: Light a memorial candle during the ceremony or reception to allow other guests to join in remembrance.
• Reserved seat: Reserve a seat at the ceremony and reception for your deceased parent. This can be a simple yet meaningful way to imagine them being there with you.
• Wedding program: Include a note "in loving memory" of your parent in the wedding program. This can be a heartfelt memento for guests and a way to carry your parent's memory with you throughout the day.
• Toast: Raise a toast in honour of your parent during the reception. It's a great way to acknowledge their memory and share your thoughts and feelings with your guests.
• Memorial poems or readings: Include a short memorial poem or reading during the ceremony or reception, dedicated to your parent. This can be a touching way to remember them and celebrate their life.
• Flowers: Hold a bouquet that reminds you of your deceased parent. This can be a subtle yet meaningful way to feel their presence with you as you walk down the aisle.
• Music: Play your parent's favourite song during the ceremony or reception. Music can evoke strong emotions and memories, so this can be a powerful way to honour their memory.
• Tribute: Write a tribute or dedication in your wedding program, expressing your love and gratitude for your parent. This can be a heartfelt way to include them in your special day.
• Personal items: Consider incorporating personal items or mementos that belonged to your parent into your wedding decor or accessories. This could be a piece of jewellery, a handkerchief, or even a photo of them displayed at the venue.
• Release of doves or butterflies: Symbolise the release of your parent's spirit and celebrate their new journey with a dove or butterfly release during the ceremony. This can be a beautiful and uplifting way to honour their memory.

Frequently asked questions