Creating Your Wedding Planner: A Guide To Getting Started

Planning a wedding can be a daunting task, but creating a DIY wedding planner can help you stay organized and ensure your big day is a success. Here are the steps to create your own wedding planner:

- Set up an overview: Begin by creating a physical wedding planner binder or using a digital alternative such as Google Docs or a wedding planning app. Include sections for important information such as the calendar, checklist, budget, guest list, and vendor details.

- Collect inspiration: Use platforms like Pinterest and Instagram to gather ideas for your wedding theme, decor, and style. Create secret boards on Pinterest to keep certain elements of your wedding a surprise for guests.

- Get organized: Utilize tools like Google Docs or a wedding planning app to stay organized on the go. Create a wedding website to keep your guests informed and create a wedding hashtag for social media.

- Finalize the details: Decide on the key elements of your wedding, such as the date, venue, guest list, attire, food and beverage, and wedding rings.

- Stay stress-free: Wedding planning can be overwhelming, so remember to take breaks and enjoy non-wedding-related activities. Delegate tasks to your partner, family, or friends, and consider hiring a wedding planner or coordinator for additional support.

Budgeting and financial planning

Determine Your Overall Budget

Firstly, figure out who will be contributing financially to the wedding. This could include you, your fiancé(e), parents, or other family members. It's important to have open and respectful conversations about how much each party is willing to spend and what specific aspects they may want to cover. Once you have an idea of the total financial assistance, focus on your own contribution. Consider how much you and your fiancé(e) can comfortably afford, taking into account your monthly income, savings, and other expenses. This will give you a ballpark wedding budget to work with.

Estimate Guest Count

The cost of a wedding is largely dependent on the number of guests. The guest count will influence the size of the venue, the amount of food and drinks, and other items such as invitations, rentals, and wedding favors. Therefore, it's crucial to have a realistic estimate of the guest count to help allocate the budget effectively.

Identify Priorities and Non-Negotiables

Discuss with your fiancé(e) and decide on your top priorities for the wedding. What are the one or two items that are most important to each of you? These could include an open bar, gourmet meals, a particular venue, or a specific type of entertainment. By identifying your non-negotiables, you can allocate a larger portion of your budget to those items and adjust spending in other areas that are less important to you.

Consider Hidden Costs and Extras

When creating your budget, be mindful of hidden costs and unexpected expenses. Some common hidden costs include setup and breakdown charges for the venue, cutting fees for the wedding cake, vendor tips, and transportation to and from the venue during the planning process. It's a good idea to build in a buffer of 5-15% of your total budget to cover any unforeseen expenses.

Research Average Costs

Research the average costs of wedding items in your desired geographical area and season. Costs can vary significantly depending on location and timing. For example, a wedding in a city like New York or Los Angeles will likely be more expensive than a wedding in a small town or rural area. Similarly, a Saturday wedding in peak season will usually be pricier than a weekday wedding in the off-season. Knowing the average costs will help you allocate your budget more effectively.

Create a Detailed Breakdown

Break down your budget into specific categories to ensure that you cover all the necessary expenses. Here are some common categories and their approximate percentages of the total budget:

• Reception venue, catering, and rentals: 40-45%
• Photography and/or videography: 10-12%
• Reception music/entertainment: 10%
• Wedding attire: 7-9%
• Flowers and décor: 8-10%
• Wedding planner/coordinator: 5-15%
• Wedding stationery: 2-5%
• Wedding cake: 2-3%
• Transportation: 2-3%
• Wedding favors and gifts: 1-2%
• Tips: 5-15%

Remember that these are just averages, and you can adjust the percentages based on your priorities and preferences.

Track Your Spending

Use a spreadsheet, budgeting app, or a dedicated wedding budget platform to track your spending. Include all expenses, taxes, fees, and tips in your tracking system. This will help you stay organized and ensure that you don't exceed your budget.

Choosing a date and venue

Consider your desired season

Think about the time of year you would like to get married. Do you dream of a sunny spring wedding or a cosy winter celebration? The season will be a significant factor in choosing your wedding date, especially if you want an outdoor ceremony. Keep in mind that the seasons with the most predictable weather, such as autumn in temperate climates, tend to be more popular than those with more variable weather, like early summer or winter.

Think about meaningful dates

You won't forget your anniversary if it falls on a date that's already significant to you and your partner. Consider celebrating your wedding on the anniversary of your first date, the day you became a couple, your parents' anniversary, or another sentimental date.

Consult your wedding VIPs

You'll want your nearest and dearest to be there on your wedding day, so make sure they're available on your desired date. Consult with parents, grandparents, godparents, and best friends before finalising your date. Also, try to avoid major holidays or busy travel weekends, as these can impact attendance.

Research and tour venues

Once you have a general idea of your desired season and date, start researching venues. Consider your guest list when evaluating venues, as the number of guests will impact the size of the venue you need. Ask friends and family for recommendations, search online, and check out venues on social media. Tour your favourite spaces and book your venue as early as possible, especially if you have your heart set on a particular date or venue.

Be flexible

If you're set on a specific date, you may have a limited selection of venues to choose from, unless you plan well in advance. On the other hand, if you're flexible with the date, you can choose your dream venue first and then pick your date based on their availability. Keep in mind that popular venues tend to book up quickly, so early planning is essential.

Consider your budget

Your budget may influence your choice of date and venue. Peak wedding season, typically between May and October, tends to be more expensive due to high demand. Consider off-peak dates or less competitive seasons to save on venue and vendor costs. Friday and Sunday weddings can also be more budget-friendly than traditional Saturday weddings.

Creating a guest list

Start with a Realistic Budget

The number of guests you invite will impact your budget. From the number of people you need to feed to the number of place settings and centerpieces, your headcount will affect your spending. It's important to set a budget first and then decide on the number of invitations you can send out.

Prioritize Close Loved Ones

Focus on your closest loved ones and immediate family members first. Think about who you really want to be there and who must be there, such as parents, siblings, close friends, and grandparents. If you have a larger guest list, be aware that you may not get the chance to interact with everyone, so consider whether you want to spend time making small talk or celebrating with a tight-knit group.

Be Mindful of the B-List

A B-list is common in wedding planning, but it should be handled carefully. If you have a B-list, send invitations at least four months in advance to give yourself time to add these guests in a timely and considerate manner. Be mindful of groups within the B-list, such as coworkers. It's best to ensure there's room for the entire group rather than inviting only one or two people from the same social circle.

Set a Policy for Plus-Ones

Decide early on how you'll handle plus-ones. You may want to allow plus-ones for your wedding party, engaged couples, or those who live together. Alternatively, you may choose not to allow any plus-ones at all. Whatever you decide, be consistent and communicate this policy clearly to your guests.

Utilize a Guest List Manager

Use a central place to track your guest list, such as a simple list or spreadsheet. Tools like The Knot Guest List Manager can also help you manage tasks like collecting addresses and phone numbers, and they can be integrated with wedding websites for RSVP tracking.

Consider Travel Requirements

Keep your guests' potential travel needs in mind. Factors such as visa rules or convenient flight options to your destination wedding location can impact guests' ability to attend.

Write Out Draft Lists Separately

Sit down with your partner and write out separate guest lists. Then, compare and see who overlaps to create your initial list. You can also gather lists from both sets of parents to see if there is any overlap with your list and address any extra family and friends.

Remember, creating a guest list is just one part of wedding planning. It's important to stay organized and give yourself enough time to plan your dream wedding.

Selecting a wedding party

• Start thinking early. It's a good idea to start considering your wedding party a month or two after your engagement. This will give you enough time to make an informed decision, as your choice will impact your pre-wedding events and personal relationships.
• Include your nearest and dearest. Your siblings and your future spouse's siblings are often included in the wedding party. Close friends and family members from both sides are also common choices. Consider people who are trustworthy and have known you and your partner throughout your relationship.
• Keep the size of your wedding party proportional to the total number of guests. For a small wedding (under 150 people), a small wedding party is usually best – typically five or fewer attendants per side. For a larger wedding, you can have a bigger wedding party.
• Don't worry about having an even number of attendants on each side. While it may look nice in photos, it's more important to have a wedding party that reflects your closest friends and family members. You can always double up for the walk down the aisle.
• Mix up the traditional sides. The wedding party doesn't have to be divided strictly by gender. Feel free to include a "bridesman" or a "groomslady". You can even mix up the attire to match your colour scheme.
• Choose your maid of honour (or best man) first. Selecting your honour attendant(s) first will make it easier to fill in the rest of your wedding party. If you're struggling to choose between two people, you can always have multiple honour attendants.
• Consider your current relationships. Include the people you are closest with at the moment. You don't have to reciprocate a bridesmaid offer you received or include someone in your wedding party just because you were in theirs.
• Be fair and considerate. While it's your day and you should be able to pick the wedding party you want, try to be mindful of people's feelings. If you have siblings, for example, don't exclude one just because you had a minor disagreement in the past.
• Don't feel pressured to include children. You don't have to have a flower girl or ring bearer just to add cuteness to your wedding. If there are children you are truly close to, include them, but it's okay to have a wedding party without kids.
• Be clear about expectations and responsibilities. Let your wedding party know what their responsibilities will be, such as planning advice, wedding tasks, and financial commitments. This will help them decide if they can commit to being a part of your wedding party.

Building a wedding website

Determine the Purpose and Goals of Your Wedding Website

Firstly, decide on the purpose of your wedding website. Identify the key information you want to include, such as the date, time, and location of the wedding, as well as any other relevant details. You may also want to use the website to tell your guests more about yourself and your partner, or to list your wedding registry.

Choose a Website Builder

Using a website builder is an easy and quick way to create your wedding website without needing to rely on a web designer or code. Wix, Squarespace, and The Knot are three popular options, each with their own advantages. Wix offers ease of use and creative freedom, Squarespace has elegant designs ideal for sharing photos and videos, and The Knot is a specialised wedding website builder that doubles as an online wedding planner.

Pick a Unique Domain Name

A domain name is the web address of your site, e.g. "www.stacy.wixsite.com/stacyandjohnswedding". You can get a free domain name that includes the website builder's branding, or pay extra for a custom domain that is shorter and more memorable.

Choose and Personalise a Template

Website builders offer a range of templates that you can customise to make your own. Choose a template that reflects the tone and vibe of your wedding, and personalise it with your colour scheme, photos, and font.

Add the Important Details

Add all the key details about your wedding, such as the time, date, location, dress code, schedule of the day, and a copy of the menu. You can also include a page about you and your partner, with photos and a short description, and a page introducing your wedding party.

Include an RSVP Form

Including an online RSVP form is an easy way to manage your guest list. This saves time and effort compared to traditional RSVP slips, but you may still want to include these for older family members who may struggle to access your website.

Include a Gift Registry

It is considered bad etiquette to include registry information on your invitations, so your website is the perfect place to point guests towards the perfect presents. You can list any brands you've registered with, or accept donations via PayPal if you're asking for money instead of gifts.

Make Your Site Exclusive

To prevent wedding crashing, you can make your website private by blocking it from appearing in search engine results and adding password protection.

Make It Part of Your Big Day

Get creative and interactive by including a social streaming app that allows guests to share photos and videos directly to your site, or a guestbook that guests can sign virtually.

Optimise Your Wedding Website for Mobile Devices

Make sure your website is mobile-friendly by choosing a responsive template, keeping navigation simple, and using "touch-friendly" features.

Review and Test Your Wedding Website

Before sending it out to guests, proofread all text for spelling and grammar errors, check that all links and forms are working, and test any interactive elements.

Share Your Wedding Website

Include the link to your wedding website on your save-the-date cards and invitations, or use a bespoke QR code that guests can scan.

Building your own wedding website is a fun and easy way to share the details of your wedding and keep your guests informed and excited.

Frequently asked questions