Planning A Wedding: Reducing Stress, Enhancing Joy

Planning a wedding can be stressful, but there are ways to make the process more enjoyable. From creating a detailed to-do list to asking for help from a wedding planner, there are many strategies to reduce stress levels and create a positive experience.

A large number of decisions need to be made, from the guest list to the seating plan, and it is easy to become overwhelmed. However, by staying organised, communicating openly, and focusing on what truly matters, couples can ensure that their wedding planning is a fun and memorable experience.

With the right approach, couples can look back on their wedding planning with fond memories and, most importantly, enjoy their special day.

Create a detailed budget

Creating a detailed budget is an essential step in wedding planning. It is one of the worst stressors that couples face during the planning process, so it is important to clarify your budget and track your spending.

Firstly, create a high-level wedding budget, and then break down that money into different categories. Creating a budget spreadsheet will help you visualise your spending and allow you to see if there is any wiggle room or areas you may need to scale back. You can also use apps like Trello or Milanote to keep track of your budget.

It is recommended to leave about 5% of your budget aside for miscellaneous expenses. Some surprise costs that you may run into include unexpected guests, vendor meals, gratuities, service charges, overtime costs, postage, and insurance.

It is also important to manage expectations. Very few couples can have every element they want, so it is crucial to set a budget and educate yourself about the specific market where your wedding is taking place. Take time to understand why certain things—like flowers, a high-quality photographer, or lighting—cost what they do. This will help you set yourself up to have more reasonable expectations.

Finally, good communication is key. Be upfront about your expectations and budget with your families and vendors. Even when feeling emotional or stressed, do your best to remain respectful and hear out everyone's thoughts and feelings.

Make a to-do list

Making a to-do list is an effective way to reduce stress when planning a wedding. Wedding planning involves a multitude of tasks, and creating a to-do list will help you stay organised and on top of everything.

Firstly, consider using a physical wedding planner that includes checklists, worksheets, calendars, and more. This will help you to keep track of your budget and timeline and will also keep all your planning in one easy-to-access place. Alternatively, if you prefer digital solutions, apps like Trello or Milanote are great for creating to-do lists and wedding mood boards.

Your to-do list should include all the tasks you need to complete, both big and small, and you can set reminders for tasks that need to be done by specific dates. Break down the process into bite-sized pieces to avoid feeling overwhelmed. For example, you could designate one day a week for getting organised or work on your wedding plans for an hour at the end of each day.

Along with your to-do list, it can be helpful to keep a "done list". This will allow you to see and celebrate all that you have accomplished, helping you to feel more positive and motivated.

To make your to-do list even more effective, you can also create a detailed budget spreadsheet. This will help you track your spending and allow you to see if there is any wiggle room or areas where you need to cut back. It is recommended to leave about 5% of your budget aside for miscellaneous expenses, such as unexpected guests, vendor meals, gratuities, service charges, overtime costs, postage, and insurance.

By staying organised and on top of your tasks, you'll be able to reduce stress and make the wedding planning process more enjoyable.

Delegate tasks

Planning a wedding can be stressful, but there are ways to make the process more enjoyable. One way to reduce stress is by delegating tasks to friends, family, and professionals. Here are some tips to help you delegate tasks effectively:

Identify areas where you need help

Start by identifying the tasks that need to be done for the wedding. These may include creating a guest list, sending invitations, coordinating with vendors, managing the budget, and more. Once you have a list of tasks, decide which ones you need help with. You may want to delegate tasks that are time-consuming, complicated, or simply not your forte.

Ask for help from friends and family

Your friends and family want to see you succeed and are usually more than happy to help. For example, if you have a friend who is a calligrapher, ask them to help with place cards or invitations. Or, if you have a crafty idea for wedding favours, gather your bridesmaids for a day of crafting. Not only will this make the process easier, but it will also create special memories with your loved ones.

Hire a wedding planner

If your budget allows, consider hiring a wedding planner. They can help manage your budget, bring your vision to life, keep things organized, and communicate with vendors. A good wedding planner can also save you money by negotiating discounts with suppliers. This will take a lot of stress off your shoulders and free up your time to focus on other tasks.

Communicate your expectations clearly

When delegating tasks, be clear about what you need and want. Communicate your expectations, deadlines, and any other important details. This will help ensure that everyone is on the same page and reduce the risk of misunderstandings or last-minute surprises.

Be open to feedback and collaboration

Remember that your friends, family, and wedding planner likely have your best interests at heart. Be open to their feedback and suggestions. Collaboration can often lead to even better results than working alone. It's also important to be flexible and adaptable, as there may be unexpected changes or challenges along the way.

Show your appreciation

Don't forget to thank the people who have helped you along the way. Whether it's a heartfelt card, a small gift, or a special mention in your speech, showing your appreciation will go a long way. They will feel valued and know that their contributions made a difference in making your wedding day special.

Focus on your priorities

Planning a wedding can be a stressful and overwhelming experience. Focusing on your priorities can help you to manage this stress and ensure you are planning a wedding that is true to you and your partner.

Identify your "must-haves"

Before you begin booking vendors or putting down deposits, make a list of your absolute must-haves. This could be anything from a professional photographer to live flowers, a farm-to-table meal, or a specific venue. Refer back to this list whenever you start to feel stressed—it will help you stay focused and avoid getting bogged down in the smaller details.

Create a budget

Budgeting is one of the most stressful parts of wedding planning. Creating a detailed, high-level budget, and then breaking that budget down into different categories, will help you to stay on track and avoid overspending. It will also allow you to see if there is any wiggle room in your budget or if you need to scale back. Be sure to leave about 5% of your budget aside for unexpected costs, such as extra guests, vendor meals, gratuities, service charges, and postage.

Prioritise your guests

If taking care of your guests is a top priority, ask yourself how you can be hospitable to every guest. Think about the experience from start to finish. From the save-the-date to the transportation, where are the touchpoints where you can sprinkle in a little extra love, hospitality, and surprise?

Plan ahead

Start your wedding planning by doing some research. Find inspiration online or ask friends and family for recommendations. This will give you an idea of what you want and make decision-making faster and easier.

Delegate

Don't be afraid to ask for help. Your wedding party and family members want to see you succeed and will be happy to lend a hand. If your budget allows, consider hiring a wedding planner to manage your budget, bring your vision to life, keep things organised, and handle communication with other vendors.

Take time for self-care

Planning a wedding can be stressful, so it's important to take time for self-care. Here are some tips to help you de-stress and focus on your wellbeing:

• Prioritize self-care activities that make you feel relaxed and happy. This could include practising meditation or yoga, taking a relaxing bath, booking a massage, or engaging in your favourite hobby.
• Be present and mindful during your self-care activities to fully benefit from their therapeutic effects.
• Make self-care a consistent practice. Incorporate it into your weekly routine to reduce your reactions to stressful situations and build resilience.
• Take care of your physical and mental health. Prioritize healthy habits such as adequate sleep, a balanced diet, regular exercise, and stress-reducing activities like meditation or yoga.
• Delegate tasks to your wedding party, family, or friends. Don't be afraid to ask for help and allow them to support you during this busy time.
• Set aside dedicated time for planning and for taking a break from planning. Schedule self-care activities during your free time to create a stress-free space for yourself.
• Treat yourself! Indulge in your favourite treats, whether it's ice cream, a glass of wine, or a relaxing date night with your fiancé.
• Remember the big picture. Your wedding is about marrying the person you love and celebrating with your loved ones. Don't sweat the small stuff and keep your eye on what truly matters.

Frequently asked questions