Etiquette Guide: Indicating Plus-Ones On Wedding Invitations

Planning a wedding guest list can be a tricky task, especially when it comes to deciding who gets a plus one. While there are no set rules, there are some best practices and etiquette guidelines to help you navigate this process. The number of guests you can invite will depend on your budget and venue capacity, but it's generally recommended to offer plus ones to those in the bridal party, married or engaged couples, and out-of-town guests who won't know many people at the wedding. You can indicate plus ones on your invitations by addressing the envelope to the guest and their plus one, or by including a note inside with the RSVP card.

Address the envelope to the individual and their plus one

When inviting a guest and their plus one to your wedding, it is important to address the envelope to both the individual and their guest. This is the clearest way to indicate that the guest is welcome to bring someone along.

The outer envelope should be addressed with the guest's name and their plus one's name if you have that information. For example, "Mrs. Valerie Smith and Mrs. Hannah Woods". If you don't know the name of the plus one, you can simply write "and Guest". For example, "Mrs. Valerie Smith and Guest".

If you are using both an outer and inner envelope, the outer envelope should be addressed with the guest's name, and the inner envelope can include the guest's name and "and Guest". For example, "Mrs. Valerie Smith & Guest".

It is also important to follow the proper format for addressing an envelope. The sender's name and address generally go in the top left corner of the envelope. The recipient's name and address should be centred on the bottom half of the envelope. Any postage or stamps go in the top right corner.

By addressing the envelope to the individual and their plus one, you are clearly indicating that they are both invited to the wedding. This helps to avoid any confusion or misunderstandings about the number of guests invited. It is also a polite and respectful way to extend the invitation to your guests and their plus ones.

Include the number of guests invited on the RSVP card

When it comes to wedding planning, one of the most important considerations is the number of guests. It is essential to communicate the number of guests invited clearly on the RSVP card to avoid confusion and manage expectations. Here are some instructive guidelines on how to indicate the number of guests invited on the RSVP card:

Firstly, it is crucial to address the wedding invitation specifically to those invited. This means including the names of the invited guests on the outer envelope. For example, if a couple is invited, list both guests by their full names. If a single guest is allowed a plus one, write the guest's name followed by "and guest." This traditional approach ensures that guests understand who is invited and avoids any assumptions or misunderstandings.

Secondly, the RSVP card should include a clear indication of the number of guests invited. One effective way to do this is to add a line that states, "__ of __ seats have been reserved in your honour." By filling in the second blank, you can indicate the total number of guests invited, including any plus ones. This approach ensures that your guests are aware of the exact number of seats reserved for them and helps prevent unexpected additional guests.

Another option is to use a phrase such as "We have reserved __ seats in your honour," filling in the blank with the specific number of seats. This wording clearly communicates the number of guests invited without mentioning "plus ones" directly. This approach maintains a polite tone while providing a definitive indication of the guest limit.

In some cases, you may want to allow single guests to bring a plus one but also want to give them the option to decline. In this scenario, you can include a line on the RSVP card that says, "Number of guests attending: __ of 2." By filling in the number 2, you are indicating that the invited guest has the option to bring one additional person. This approach offers flexibility while still maintaining clarity on the total number of guests.

It is worth noting that some guests may still assume they can bring additional people, especially if they have children or other family members they wish to include. To mitigate this risk, it is essential to be as explicit as possible on the RSVP card and consider including a polite note explaining that, due to space limitations, only the invited guests can attend.

By following these guidelines and adapting them to your specific situation, you can effectively communicate the number of guests invited on your RSVP cards, ensuring a smooth and well-organised wedding planning process.

Put plus one info on your wedding website

Put plus-one info on your wedding website

It is important to establish clear and consistent rules about who gets a plus-one on your wedding website. This will help manage guest expectations and make the invitation process smoother. Here are some tips to help you navigate this aspect of wedding planning:

Define what a plus-one means to you

According to wedding planner Emily Coyne, a plus-one typically refers to "a date or a romantic interest" but could also include a family member escorting an older guest or a close friend attending with a single person. Understanding what constitutes a plus-one for you and your partner will help you decide who gets one and communicate your decisions effectively.

Understand the factors that influence plus-one decisions

The number of plus-ones you can offer may depend on various factors, such as your budget, venue capacity, and the number of people you want present on your wedding day. It is essential to consider how allowing plus-ones will impact the social dynamics of your event and your seating chart.

Establish consistent rules

Consistency is key when it comes to plus-one invitations. For example, if you offer a plus-one to one person in the wedding party, it is advisable to extend the same courtesy to all members of the wedding party. This approach will help you avoid any perceptions of favouritism.

Prioritise certain guests for plus-ones

There are certain guests that wedding etiquette suggests should receive a plus-one. These include members of the couple's immediate family, wedding party members, outlier guests who won't know many other attendees, and couples who are engaged, live together, or are in a serious or long-term relationship.

Create an "A" and "B" list

If you are struggling to keep your guest list within a reasonable length, consider creating an "A" list of guests who should absolutely receive a plus-one and a "B" list of guests you would like to include if possible. This approach will help you manage your guest list and stay within your budget.

Know which guests can be left off the plus-one list

Not everyone needs to receive a plus-one. You can leave off guests who are casually dating or new couples, as well as single guests who will know many other people at the wedding.

Prepare a kind and firm explanation

Even with clear guidelines, some guests may still reach out to request a plus-one. It is essential to have a kind and firm explanation ready for these situations. Something like, "We'd love to include everyone, but our budget only allowed us to invite close friends and family. We appreciate your understanding, and we hope to see you there!"

Use proper plus-one invitation etiquette

When addressing invitations, use the term "invited guest" instead of "plus-one" to add formality. For single guests granted a plus-one, address the invitation to the primary guest's name and "invited guest" or include a plus-one note inside with the RSVP card. For unmarried couples living together, address both parties on the outside and inside of the invitation.

Be mindful of seating arrangements

When it comes to wedding plus-ones, seating arrangements are crucial. Here are some tips to ensure a comfortable and enjoyable experience for all your guests:

Be mindful of the guest's relationship status

Place single guests between outgoing and friendly couples. This will create a communal feel and help them meet people organically. Avoid seating singles next to overly affectionate couples or those who are overly engrossed in each other, as this can be awkward. Creating a "singles-only" table may give the impression of corralling single guests and make them feel isolated.

Consider the guest's familiarity with other attendees

For guests who are not in a relationship but may not know many other people at the wedding, consider seating them with individuals they are likely to get along with. This could be based on similar interests, ages, or backgrounds. This will help them feel more comfortable and included.

Account for additional plus-ones

If you are offering plus-ones to single guests or those who are not in a relationship, be prepared for the possibility of last-minute additions. Ensure your seating arrangements can accommodate these extra guests without disrupting the overall dynamic you have planned.

Avoid potential conflicts

When creating your seating chart, be mindful of any known conflicts or tensions between guests. Seat guests away from those they may have issues with to avoid unwanted drama and ensure a safe and enjoyable experience for all.

Encourage a positive atmosphere

Seating arrangements can significantly impact the atmosphere at the wedding. Aim for a mix of guests at each table who will get along well and foster a positive and festive vibe. This will enhance the overall experience for everyone, including those with plus-ones.

Include the plus one on the invitation

When it comes to wedding invitations, the general rule is that the outer envelope addresses the recipient (the guest or couple you know personally) and the inner envelope lists all the names of those who are invited, such as children or plus-ones. This is the traditional way of doing it, but if you're only including one envelope or sending an online invitation, be sure to address all invitees clearly and upfront.

If the couple is in a relationship, list both guests by their full names. If you're allowing a guest to bring a casual date, write your friend's name and then "and guest". This is the standard way of indicating a plus one, and it's important to be clear so as not to cause confusion.

If you are sending paper invitations, the inner envelope is the place to indicate a plus one. Write the guest's name and then add "and guest". You can also include an RSVP card with a line that says "you are invited to bring one guest" or "you are invited to bring a plus one".

If you are sending online invitations, be sure to include the plus-one information on the invitation itself. List the guest's name and then add "and guest", or include an additional line that says "plus one welcome".

It is also a good idea to include information about plus-ones on your wedding website, especially if you are sending out paper invitations that don't include an inner envelope. This way, guests can easily check if they are allowed to bring a plus one. On your website, you can simply state: "If 'and guest' or your plus-one's name is written on your wedding invitation, you can bring someone."

Frequently asked questions