Junior Rasmussen
Wedding invitation wording can be tricky, especially when it comes to including stepparents. The traditional approach is to only include the names of the parents, but it has become increasingly common to list stepparents as well, especially if they are contributing financially to the wedding or have played a significant role in the life of the couple. When including stepparents, it is customary to list the mother (and her spouse, if applicable) first, followed by the father (and his spouse). If both parents have remarried and there are multiple names, the bride's last name should also be included for clarification. If the list of names becomes too long, it is acceptable to opt for a simpler approach, such as Together with their families or Together with their parents. Ultimately, the most important consideration is to respect the feelings of all parties involved and navigate the family dynamics with clear and kind communication.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Communication | Discuss the best ways to move forward with incorporating one another into the wedding day activities |
| Relationship | Depending on the relationship with the stepparent, they may be expecting to be included or excluded |
| Seating arrangements | Seat stepparents with their spouse and friends or family members |
| Include in the procession | Have the stepparent walk with their spouse ahead of the wedding party or escort the bride or groom |
| Mention on the invitation | Include the stepparent's name on the invitation, especially if they are contributing financially |
What You'll Learn
Include step-parents' names on the invitation
Including step-parents' names on the invitation is a great way to involve them in your wedding, especially if they are contributing financially to the wedding. Here are some ways to do this:
Listing Step-Parents Individually
If your parents are divorced and remarried, you may want to specifically name your step-parents on your wedding invitation. The basic rule of thumb is to tread lightly and not bring attention to any family dynamics that may cause tension. If one parent has been remarried for a significant amount of time and the step-parent has played an important role in your life, it is appropriate to include their name on the same line as their spouse. For example:
> Mr. and Mrs. Sean Hamilton (mom + stepdad) Mr. John Davis (dad) request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter Stephanie Elizabeth to...
Including Both Sets of Parents
If both your parents have remarried and you want to include all four parents on the invitation, list each set of parents on separate lines. Include your last name for clarification:
> Mr. and Mrs. Sean Hamilton (mom + stepdad)
> Mr. and Mrs. John Davis (dad + stepmom)
> request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter Stephanie Elizabeth Davis...
Using "Together with Their Families"
If you are overwhelmed by the number of names on your invitation, it is acceptable to use the phrase "Together with their families" or "Together with their parents" at the top of the invitation. This is a good option if the groom's parents are also divorced and remarried. Some couples may worry that this wording is too informal, so it is worth discussing with your parents beforehand to hear their thoughts.
Other Considerations
When including step-parents' names on the invitation, it is important to respect the feelings of both your parents and step-parents. If they want to be involved, that's great! If not, they don't have to be. It is also crucial to consider the relationships between your parents and step-parents. If they get along, they can be invited together to wedding-related events such as venue tours and dress shopping. If not, you may need to divide responsibilities or keep them separate at the wedding.
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List step-parents separately
When it comes to wedding invitations, there are many unique family situations to consider. If you want to list step-parents separately on your wedding invitations, here are some ways to do so:
Mom Always Comes First:
It is customary for the mother to be listed first, whether she is the biological parent or step-parent. If your mother has remarried, her name and her new husband's name will appear on the first line, followed by your father and his new wife (if applicable) on the second line. For example:
> Mr. and Mrs. Sean Hamilton (mom + stepdad)
> Mr. John Davis (dad) request the honor of your presence at the marriage of their daughter Stephanie Elizabeth to...
Use Your Last Name:
If both your parents have remarried and you want to list all four parents' names, it is traditional to include your last name for clarification. For example:
> Mr. and Mrs. Sean Hamilton (mom + stepdad)
> Mr. and Mrs. John Davis (dad + stepmom) request the honor of your presence at the marriage of their daughter Stephanie Elizabeth Davis...
List Each Party Separately:
If both your parents and step-parents are involved, you can list each party separately on your invitation. For example:
> Sally and Frank Smith
> John and Susan Jones
> request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their daughter...
It's Okay Not to List Everyone:
If you feel overwhelmed by the number of names, it is acceptable to use a general phrase such as "Together with their families" or "Together with their parents" at the beginning of the invitation. This option is especially useful if the groom's parents are also divorced and remarried. While some consider this wording too informal, it is a good solution for certain invitation designs or complex family dynamics.
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Be mindful of family dynamics
When it comes to including stepparents in wedding invitations, it's important to be mindful of family dynamics to ensure everyone is respected and comfortable. Here are some considerations to keep in mind:
- The relationship between you and your stepparent: Reflect on the nature of your relationship with your stepparent. Are you close? Did they help raise you? Or is it a more distant or new relationship? Communicate your wishes for their involvement accordingly. If you want them to take on a traditional parent role, let them know. If you don't want them involved, have an honest conversation early on and explain your reasons kindly.
- The relationship between your stepparent and biological parent: Consider how your stepparent and biological parent get along. If they have a good relationship, involve them both in wedding activities and discussions about roles. If there is tension between them, it's important to set boundaries and manage expectations early. Decide how you want them to be involved individually and communicate this to them separately.
- Involving stepparents in the wedding planning: Including stepparents in the planning process is a great way to make them feel valued. Invite them to tour venues, go dress shopping, or help with other wedding tasks. You can also assign specific tasks or events for them to lead, such as hosting the engagement party or rehearsal dinner. This will make them feel like an essential part of your special day.
- Listing stepparents on the invitations: Traditionally, only the parents' names appear on wedding invitations. However, it is becoming more common and acceptable to list stepparents, especially if they are contributing financially or have played a significant role in your life. List your mother (and her husband, if remarried) first, followed by your father (and his partner). Use "and" between names to indicate that couples are married. If there are multiple sets of parents and stepparents, you can list each couple separately or use "Together with their families" to keep the invitation concise.
- Seating arrangements: When it comes to seating at the wedding reception, it's important to consider family dynamics. If your parents are divorced, they should be seated at separate tables with their spouses or partners and their respective friends or family members. Avoid placing their tables too close together if there is tension between them.
- Involving stepparents in the ceremony: There are several ways to include stepparents in the wedding ceremony. They can walk down the aisle at the beginning of the procession, escort the bride or groom, or even walk the bride/groom down the aisle together with their biological parent. Discuss this with them beforehand to ensure everyone is comfortable with the arrangement.
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Consider step-parents' contributions
Including stepparents in your wedding can be a tricky situation, especially if your family dynamics are complicated. However, if your stepparent has played an important role in your life, it is only natural to want to include them in your special day. Here are some ways to consider their contributions and involve them in your wedding:
Involve Them in the Planning Process
Depending on your relationship and how well your family gets along, you can invite your stepparents to be a part of the planning process. This could mean including them in activities such as touring venues, dress shopping, menu tasting, or assembling favours. You can also assign specific tasks to them, such as creating welcome bags or handling certain aspects of the wedding planning. This is a great way to make your stepparents feel valued and involved in the lead-up to your wedding.
List Them on the Wedding Invitations
One meaningful way to acknowledge your stepparent's contributions is to include their names on your wedding invitations. Traditionally, only the parents' names appear on the invitation. However, if your stepparent has played a significant role in your life or is contributing financially to the wedding, it is appropriate to list them as well. The general rule is to place your mother (and her husband, if she's remarried) first, followed by your father (and his partner). If both your parents have remarried, you can list each set of parents on separate lines to avoid cluttering the invitation. For example:
> Mr. and Mrs. Sean Hamilton (mom + stepdad)
> Mr. and Mrs. John Davis (dad + stepmom)
> request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter Stephanie Elizabeth Davis...
Including your stepparents on the invitations is a thoughtful way to show your appreciation and make them feel welcomed as part of the family.
Offer Them a Special Role in the Ceremony
Another way to honour your stepparents during the wedding ceremony is by offering them a special role. This could be walking you down the aisle, escorting you to the altar, or participating in a special dance. If you have a close relationship with your stepparent, you may want to include them in a parent-child dance or ask them to give a toast at the reception. These gestures will make your stepparent feel valued and appreciated on your wedding day.
Seat Them Appropriately at the Reception
When it comes to seating arrangements at the reception, it's important to consider the dynamics between your stepparents and biological parents. If your parents are divorced, it is customary to seat them at separate tables with their spouses and friends or family members. This helps to avoid any tension or discomfort during the reception. By giving each parent their own table, you can create a comfortable environment for everyone involved.
Present Them with a Special Gift
If your stepparent has been instrumental in planning your wedding or has offered significant support, consider presenting them with a special gift as a token of your appreciation. This could be something personalised, such as a handkerchief embroidered with a heartfelt message or a picture frame with a family photo. A thoughtful gift is a wonderful way to honour your stepparent's contributions and create a lasting memory of your wedding day.
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Be clear about hosting
The host line is the opening line on a wedding invitation and names the hosts of the event. Traditionally, the bride's parents are the hosts of the wedding and are named at the top of the invitation. However, this is not always the case, and nowadays, it is respectful to list anyone contributing to your big day on your invites, either by name or with a phrase like "together with their families".
If you have a step-parent who has played an important role in your life, it is appropriate to include their name on the same line as their spouse. For example, if your mother has remarried, you could write "Michelle & Timothy Wright". If both your parents are divorced and have remarried, you can include them all, keeping each parent on a separate line. For example:
> Sally and Frank Smith
> John and Susan Jones
> request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their daughter...
If you have multiple sets of remarried parents hosting the wedding, you can either list each couple on their own line or use the phrase ""together with their families" to keep the invitation simple. For example:
> Kenzie M. Smith and Jennifer L. Smith
> Mark Franklin and Mary Elizabeth Reyes
> request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their children...
If you are hosting the wedding yourselves, you can omit the host line altogether.
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Frequently asked questions
If your parents are divorced, it is customary to list your mother's name on the first line of the invitation and your father's name on the second line. If your mother has remarried, you can include her new husband's name on the first line. If both your parents have remarried, you can list each couple on their own line or use the phrase "Together with their families" to keep the invitation concise.
It is not necessary to include your step-parents in your wedding invitations, but it is a nice gesture, especially if they are contributing financially to the wedding or have played an important role in your life.
Traditionally, the mother is listed first, followed by the father on a separate line. If your mother has remarried, you can include her new husband's name on the same line, preceded by "and". For example: "Mr. and Mrs. Sean Hamilton request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter Stephanie Elizabeth to...".
If you feel that there are too many names on the invitation, you can use the phrase "Together with their families" or "Together with their parents" at the top of the invitation. This is a good option if the groom's parents are also divorced and remarried.
