Crafting Best Man Speeches: Ghostwriting Guide

Ghostwriting a best man's speech can be a challenging task, but with careful planning, personal touches, and confident delivery, it can be a standout moment at a wedding. It is an important part of the wedding reception, where the best man has the opportunity to celebrate the groom, entertain the guests, and show support for the couple. A good best man's speech should be personal and heartfelt, speaking to the groom, his bride, and their families. It should also be an ode to the past and a toast to the future.

To craft a memorable best man's speech, it is essential to start by writing down all your thoughts, feelings, and memories about the groom. Using a template as a guide can be helpful, but it is important to infuse your personality and experiences into the speech. The opening and closing lines are crucial, as they leave a lasting impression. The speech should include stories and anecdotes about the groom, highlighting his positive traits and accomplishments. It is also important to share what the groom means to you and express your well-wishes for the couple.

Practicing the speech is crucial for a stellar delivery. Rehearsing multiple times helps with familiarizing oneself with the content, timing, and flow. Calming techniques, such as deep breathing, can also help ease nerves before and during the speech. Connecting with the audience through eye contact, clear speech, and hand gestures is essential. Keeping the speech focused, adding personal touches, and practicing will ensure that it is something that the couple and guests will remember fondly.

Using a template as a guide

Choose the Right Template:

Select a template that suits the style and tone you want to achieve. There are various templates available online, offering different structures and themes. Opt for one that aligns with your relationship with the groom and the overall vibe of the wedding. Some templates provide a general outline, while others are tailored for specific scenarios, such as a best man speech for a brother or a funny best man speech.

Introduction and Self-Introduction:

Begin your speech by breaking the ice and grabbing the audience's attention. You can start with a joke, a funny anecdote, or a light-hearted comment about the wedding. Follow this by introducing yourself and explaining your relationship with the groom. This is your chance to set the tone and make a strong first impression.

Compliments and Thank You's:

Show your appreciation for the couple and the people who made the wedding possible. Compliment the bride and groom on their appearance, the wedding ceremony, or any other aspect that stood out to you. Thank the wedding party, the guests, and the parents for their contributions and attendance. This section is all about creating a positive and grateful atmosphere.

Stories and Anecdotes:

Share a story or two about your relationship with the groom. It can be a funny incident from your childhood, college days, or any memorable experience you've shared. This adds a personal touch to your speech and gives the audience a glimpse into your bond with the groom. If possible, include the bride in your stories as well, especially in a positive light.

Highlight the Couple's Relationship:

Talk about the couple and their journey together. Share how they met, from your perspective, and express your initial thoughts on their connection. If you weren't there when they first met, talk about the positive impact the bride has had on your friend's life. You can also mention how the groom has changed and grown since meeting his partner.

Inspirational Quotes or Lyrics:

Include a meaningful quote or song lyric that captures the essence of your speech or reflects the couple's relationship. Keep it lighthearted and romantic, something that will resonate with the couple and the audience. This adds a touch of sentiment and depth to your speech.

Summarize Your Thoughts:

Towards the end of your speech, provide a concise summary of your thoughts about the bride and groom. Tie together the different elements of your speech and emphasize the couple's strengths and your well-wishes for their future. This section helps bring closure to your speech and prepares the audience for your final remarks.

Final Toast and Well-Wishes:

Conclude your speech with a heartfelt toast to the newlyweds. Congratulate them, wish them a lifetime of happiness, and propose a toast to their future together. This is your chance to leave the couple and the audience with a lasting impression. Keep it meaningful, positive, and, if appropriate, include a small joke or clever turn of phrase.

Remember, while templates provide a useful framework, it's essential to personalize your speech with your own experiences, anecdotes, and sentiments. The key to a successful best man's speech is to strike a balance between humor, sentiment, and a sincere celebration of the couple's union.

Share stories about the groom

Sharing stories about the groom is a great way to keep the audience entertained and connected. It is a good idea to reminisce and jot down anecdotes that are funny, heartwarming, or even embarrassing, that reveal the groom's personality and your relationship with him. You could also ask mutual friends for stories you may have forgotten.

When sharing stories about the groom, it is important to be true to how the groom sees himself. You may see your friend in a certain way, but if he is particularly proud of a certain aspect of himself, it is best to highlight that in your speech. For example, if your friend is proud of his rock-climbing abilities, you could talk about a time when he made himself proud by conquering a challenging climb, and segue into how his determination and resolve will help to ensure a strong union with his partner.

It is also a good idea to include ice-breakers in your speech. You could share interesting or funny anecdotes about the groom's experiences abroad or any of his favourite stories, which can act as conversation starters for guests to engage the couple. It is always a good idea to clear these stories with the couple first, so they can be prepared to tell their tale and help you avoid any embarrassing situations.

Remember to keep your speech positive and avoid mentioning the groom's physical appearance or past partners.

Share what the groom means to you

Sharing what the groom means to you is a key part of a best man's speech. This is your chance to highlight the groom's positive qualities and the impact his partner has had on him. Here are some ideas to craft this section of your speech:

Who is the Groom to You?

Firstly, introduce yourself and explain your relationship with the groom. This is especially important if many guests don't know you. You can start with a joke, such as, "Hi, I'm [Your Name], and if you see me sweating, it's either because I'm nervous or the groom turned up the heat to throw me off." Then, explain how long you've known the groom and in what context you met. For example, "I've had the pleasure of knowing [Groom's Name] for [number] years, and now you all get to hear some of our misadventures."

The Groom's Positive Qualities

Share some of the groom's best qualities. Is he adventurous? Kind? Determined? You can weave in a story or anecdote here to illustrate these qualities. For example, "One of my favorite stories is when we went on a spontaneous road trip without any plans. We ended up getting lost, but the groom's positive attitude and sense of humor turned it into one of the best experiences of our lives." This is a great way to celebrate the groom's unique attributes and give guests a glimpse into his personality.

The Impact of the Bride

Next, talk about the impact the bride has had on the groom. Has she brought out the best in him? Has he become more caring or outgoing since meeting her? You can say something like, "Since meeting you, I've seen him grow into a more caring, thoughtful, and incredibly happy person. You complement each other so well, and it's wonderful to see how much joy you bring into each other's lives." This will not only make the groom feel special but also show the bride how much she is valued and loved by her new partner and his friends and family.

Well-Wishes and Advice

Finally, offer some well-wishes and light-hearted advice for the couple's future together. You can say something like, "May your life together be filled with love, laughter, and countless joyful moments. My advice to you both is to always communicate, support each other, and never forget the love that brought you together." This will leave the couple feeling loved and supported as they embark on their married life together.

Remember to keep this section heartfelt and meaningful, focusing on the groom's positive qualities and the special people in his life.

Calming yourself before and during the speech

Calming yourself before and during a best man's speech

Being a best man at a wedding is an honour and a big responsibility. One of the biggest tasks is delivering a memorable speech. It is natural to feel nervous about public speaking, but there are ways to calm your nerves and ensure you deliver a confident performance. Here are some tips to help you relax before and during your best man's speech:

• Practice: Rehearse your speech multiple times to familiarise yourself with the content, timing, and flow. Practise in front of a mirror or with a trusted friend to refine your delivery and build your confidence.
• Visualisation: Visualise yourself as a great speaker, confidently delivering your speech and engaging the audience. This positive self-talk can help you feel more relaxed and assured.
• Breathing techniques: Focus on taking deep breaths to calm your nerves. Inhale slowly through your nose and exhale through your mouth. Deep breathing increases oxygen flow to the brain, helping to relax your body and mind.
• Light exercise: Before your speech, find a private area to do some light stretching or take a brisk walk. This helps to rid your body of excess energy and can make you feel more grounded and composed.
• Connect with the audience: Making eye contact with your audience can help ease your nerves. Remember that the guests are there to celebrate the couple, and they want your speech to be successful. Smile, and maintain eye contact to create a friendly and engaging atmosphere.
• Avoid alcohol: While a drink may seem like a good idea to calm your nerves, it can lead to disaster. It is best to avoid alcohol before your speech to ensure a clear and confident delivery.
• Prepare in advance: Start writing your speech early and give yourself ample time to practise and refine it. Procrastination will only increase your anxiety, so get started as soon as possible.
• Know your venue: Familiarise yourself with the venue and the schedule of events. Knowing your surroundings and the timing of your speech can help ease your nerves and ensure you are not caught off guard.

Remember, it is normal to feel nervous, and effective public speaking is about managing those nerves so you can connect with your audience. Practise, prepare, and visualise your success to ensure a calm and confident delivery on the big day.

Connect with the audience

The wedding day and the speeches are for the couple, but they are also for the guests. It is important to connect with the audience to ensure that your speech is memorable. Here are some tips to help you connect with the audience:

• Maintain eye contact: Look at the couple and the guests while you are speaking. Avoid looking at the ground or mumbling, as this will cause you to lose the attention of the audience.
• Speak clearly: Make sure your speech is delivered in a clear and concise manner. Avoid using jargon or complicated phrases that may confuse the audience.
• Use hand gestures: Incorporate hand gestures into your speech naturally. This will help to emphasise your points and engage the audience.
• Express your emotions genuinely: Be sincere in your delivery. If you are telling an anecdote about a victim of child abuse, for example, ensure that your face communicates the appropriate emotion. A smile during such a story may appear odd and turn off the audience.
• Practice your delivery: Rehearse your speech in front of a mirror or with a trusted friend. This will help you to refine your delivery and ensure that you are connecting with the audience.
• Keep the speech short: Aim for a length of 4-7 minutes. This will help to maintain the attention of the audience and ensure that your speech is well-received.

Frequently asked questions