Best Woman: Can I Still Use Best Man?

It is becoming increasingly common for people to choose a member of the opposite sex to be their 'best man' or 'maid of honour' at their wedding. While this is more common when the person in question is a sibling, it is also becoming more popular for people to choose a close friend of the opposite sex.

There are several considerations to make when choosing a member of the opposite sex for this role, including what they will wear, what they will be called, and whether they will attend the stag or hen party.

What to call a female best man?

It is becoming increasingly common for brides and grooms to have mixed-gender wedding parties. If you are a groom who wants to include a woman in your wedding party, you can absolutely do so. The most common name for this role is "best woman", but there are a plethora of other options, including:

• Groom's attendant
• Groom's maid of honour
• Man of honour
• Best lady
• Best maid
• Best matron
• Best person
• Best lady
• Groomsmaid
• Groomswoman

Ultimately, it is up to you and your partner to decide what to call the members of your wedding party.

Is it accepted to have a female best man?

It is generally accepted to have a female best man, though some people may still have reservations. The 21st century has seen a shift in wedding traditions, with couples moving away from rigid gender norms and expectations. This shift has resulted in a more inclusive approach to wedding parties, where individuals can choose their closest friends and family members to stand by their side, regardless of gender.

Some people may still hold traditional views and expect a best man to be male. However, the increasing acceptance of gender diversity and non-binary identities has challenged these norms. In a survey of 1,000 customers, 6% chose their sister as their best man, indicating a move towards greater flexibility and personal preference in wedding party composition.

When considering a female best man, it is essential to discuss the idea with your partner to ensure they are comfortable with the decision. Clear communication can help address any potential jealousy or concerns. It is also important to choose a title that suits the role and the individual, such as "best woman," "groomsmaid," or "man of honour."

Ultimately, the decision to have a female best man is a personal one, and couples should feel empowered to create a wedding party that reflects their unique relationships and dynamics.

What should she wear?

There are a few options for what a female best man could wear. It is important to consider what she feels comfortable in, and to keep it within the chosen colour theme.

Firstly, she could wear a female tuxedo or suit, matching the style and colouring of the other groomsmen. This is a popular option, with celebrities rocking the look on the red carpet. Alternatively, she could wear a dress that matches the colour code of the groomsmen. This could be a long dress, or a shorter dress in a similar style to the bridesmaids. If she is close to the bride, she may even opt to wear a similar dress to the other bridesmaids.

If the bridesmaids are wearing short dresses, one option is to have the female best man wear a long black dress to match the tuxedos of the groomsmen. She could also wear a black blazer with a chiffon dress, or a black satin dress to match the guys. If the bridesmaids are wearing matching dresses, she could wear the same dress but in a different colour.

Another option is to have her wear a dress in a similar colour to the bridesmaids, but with accessories to match the groomsmen. For example, if the bridesmaids are wearing blue, she could wear black to match the groomsmen, with blue accessories. She could also carry a bouquet like the bridesmaids.

The female best man should be included in discussions about her attire, and the bride-to-be should also be happy with the choice.

What are the duties of a female best man?

The duties of a best man are varied and can be adapted to suit the couple's needs. The following list outlines the duties of a best man, which can be fulfilled by a woman, as relevant to the wedding in question:

• Help choose the suits and organise final fittings.
• Assist the groom with wedding prep, including planning and arranging the stag do.
• Be the groom's go-to confidante, personal valet, and logistics guru for pre-wedding events and day-of details.
• Take charge of transportation for the couple.
• Be the groom's right-hand person on the wedding day, helping him get ready and calming any nerves.
• Keep the wedding rings safe and present them during the ceremony.
• Stand beside the groom at the altar.
• Escort the maid of honour out of the ceremony.
• Act as the master of ceremonies, making key announcements.
• Deliver the best man's speech.
• Get the party started by dancing with the maid of honour.
• Return and clean suits, and take care of wedding gifts.

The best man, or best woman, is also responsible for coordinating the groomsmen and ensuring everyone is well-informed. This may include providing reminders, sending out invitations, and checking in with the groom and groomsmen ahead of the wedding.

It is important to note that the duties of the best woman can be adapted to suit her comfort level and preferences. For example, she may choose to attend the hen party instead of the stag do, or the couple may opt for a combined "sten" do.

The best woman should also feel free to adapt her attire to suit her preferences and comfort level. She may opt for a female tuxedo or suit, a dress that matches the groomsmen's colour code, or an outfit that matches the bridesmaids.

Ultimately, the duties of a female best man can be tailored to suit the individual and the couple's needs and preferences.

Can she attend the stag do?

While it is ultimately up to the bride and groom to decide who attends their pre-wedding parties, it is becoming more common for women to be invited to stag dos, and vice versa for men being invited to hen dos. In fact, these mixed-gender parties have earned the nickname "sten do" or "hag do".

If you are a woman who has been named best man in an upcoming wedding and you are wondering whether you should attend the stag do, the best course of action is to talk to the groom about it. It is becoming more common for women to be given "best man" duties, including planning the stag, so it would make sense for you to attend. However, if you are the only woman and you don't feel comfortable, you could always opt to attend the hen party instead, or the couple could decide to combine the two parties into a "sten do".

If you are the groom and you want your female best man to attend the stag, it is a good idea to give the other attendees a heads-up, though if they are close friends, they probably won't be surprised to see her there. You should also consider the sleeping arrangements and whether there will be any activities that might make her uncomfortable, such as a visit to a strip club.

Ultimately, it is up to the couple to decide how they want to structure their wedding party and pre-wedding celebrations, and it is up to the best man to decide whether she wants to attend.

Frequently asked questions