Prepping Your Little Ring Bearer

Ring bearers are usually children between the ages of three and eight, though some sources suggest four or five as a lower limit. They walk down the aisle carrying the wedding rings on a pillow, though this isn't required. The pillow can be replaced with a variety of creative alternatives, such as a bouquet or a briefcase labelled 'ring security'. The ring bearer is usually a relative of the couple, such as their son, or the child of someone in the wedding party.

When choosing a ring bearer, it's important to select a child who is confident and capable. It's also a good idea to speak to the child's parents to ensure they're happy to take on the responsibility of explaining the ring bearer's duties to their child and paying for their outfit and accessories.

Choosing a child: The child should be between three and eight years old, confident, and capable

When choosing a child to be a ring bearer, it is important to consider their age, confidence, and capability.

Firstly, the child should ideally be between three and eight years old. This is a wide range of development, but it ensures that the child can walk and perform the necessary duties. While it is possible to choose a child younger than three, they may be more likely to cry, get distracted, or fall over. Older children may be less interested, and the "cute" factor may be diminished.

Secondly, the child should be confident and capable. Shy children may not enjoy being in front of a crowd, so it is important to select a child who likes attention. They should also understand what they are supposed to do and be capable of getting to the stage without wandering off or getting distracted.

Before asking the child, it is important to get their parents' consent. The parents will need to explain the ring bearer's duties to the child, pay for their outfit and accessories, and attend all pre-wedding events. It is also a good idea to discuss who will pay for the ring bearer's outfit.

Asking the child: Ask the child's parents first and then get creative with your proposal

Asking a child to be your ring bearer is an important task, and you'll want to ensure the parents are on board before you get the child excited about the idea. It's also good to talk to the parents about who will pay for the ring bearer's outfit and accessories.

Ring Protection Agent

Instead of asking them to be the "ring bearer", which may not make sense to them, give them a special title like "Ring Protection Agent" and tell them they are in charge of protecting the rings. You can give them a special shirt with their title on it, a badge, cool sunglasses, and a walkie-talkie. Put the rings in a ""secure" box instead of on a pillow. This option works well if you have two kids you want to be ring bearers, as they can work together as a team.

Ring Pop Proposal

Buy a ring-shaped candy pop, unwrap it, and put it in a box. Write "Will you be our ring bearer?" on the inside of the box, wrap it up, and give it to the child. This option is fun and will excite the child, but be sure to check with the parents first to ensure they are happy for their child to have candy.

Take Them Out for a Special Day

Plan to spend a whole day, afternoon, or night with the child. Talk to the parents and set up a time to take the child out. Take them to the park, buy them a toy, or go for a fancy dinner. After you've had some fun, pop the big question. This option is especially memorable if it's a first-time experience for the child.

"Be Our Ring Bearer" Puzzle

Write "Will you be our ring bearer?" on a piece of cardboard or paper and cut it out into fun shapes to create a puzzle. Give the puzzle to the child and tell them it has a special message. If they need help, start putting a few pieces into position for them. You can decorate the puzzle as elaborately as you like to make it extra fun.

Ring Bearer Pillow

If you want to stick to tradition, you can always ask the child using a ring bearer pillow. You can secure the rings to a ribbon tied around your favourite poems or scriptures, or place the rings in a bouquet. You can also let the child carry the rings in a briefcase that reads "Ring Security".

The ring: Decide whether the ring bearer will carry the real rings or a fake set

Deciding whether the ring bearer will carry the real rings or a fake set is an important consideration. Here are some things to keep in mind:

Firstly, the age and maturity level of the ring bearer should be taken into account. If the child is very young, there is a higher risk of them misplacing or dropping the real rings. In this case, it is advisable to opt for fake rings to avoid any potential disasters. Fake rings can be easily purchased, and no one will be able to tell the difference.

Secondly, it is essential to weigh the level of trust you have in the ring bearer. If you feel confident in their ability to handle the responsibility, you may want to entrust them with the real rings. However, if you have any doubts, it is better to play it safe and go with fake rings.

Additionally, consider the timing of when the real rings are handed to the ring bearer. To minimise the risk of losing the rings, it is recommended to have a member of the wedding party, such as the best man, hand them to the ring bearer right before they walk down the aisle. This reduces the amount of time the rings are in the care of the ring bearer, providing an extra layer of security.

Ultimately, the decision comes down to your personal preference and comfort level. If you choose to go with fake rings, you can rest assured that it is a common practice and will not detract from the beauty and significance of your special day.

The walk: The ring bearer should walk down the aisle after the wedding party and hand the rings to the best man or officiant

The ring bearer's big moment has arrived! After practising at the rehearsal, the ring bearer should now be ready to walk down the aisle. If the ring bearer is old enough to walk, they should do so after the wedding party. If they are too young to walk, their parent or another adult can carry them, or they can be pulled along in a small wagon or car.

The ring bearer should walk slowly, so as not to trip, and confidently, so as not to get distracted. If they are confident and capable, they may enjoy being the centre of attention. If they are shy, they may prefer to have an adult walk with them for support.

Once the ring bearer reaches the altar, they should hand the rings to the best man or officiant. If the ring bearer is mature and responsible enough, they may be able to carry the real rings. However, to avoid any mishaps, it is more common for the ring bearer to carry fake rings, while the best man or officiant keeps the real rings.

The outfit: The ring bearer's outfit should be formal and coordinate with the groom or groomsmen's attire

The outfit is one of the most important aspects of preparing your ring bearer for the wedding. The ring bearer's outfit should be formal and coordinate with the groom or groomsmen's attire. Traditionally, ring bearers wear a kid-sized tuxedo or suit. However, there are many other outfit options to choose from. Here are some ideas to consider:

Tiny tuxedos or suits are always a cute choice for ring bearers. You can add some fun accessories like suspenders, a classic bow tie, a hat, or a patterned jacket to make it more interesting. Just make sure the outfit is formal and coordinates with the groom or groomsmen's attire.

If you're having a casual beach wedding, the ring bearer can wear something more relaxed like seersucker suits, suspenders with khaki shorts, or a white button-down shirt with linen pants. For a rustic country wedding, go for a themed look with a bow tie, suspenders, jeans, and a button-down flannel shirt.

You can also opt for a more unique approach by dressing the ring bearer in a navy blue suit and tie, or even a lighter suit or vest for a more casual feel. If you want to add a pop of colour, consider a burgundy or pink suspenders and bow tie combination.

Don't forget to consider the comfort of the ring bearer when choosing their outfit. You want to make sure they feel comfortable and confident while still looking formal and coordinating with the rest of the wedding party.

The ring bearer's parents are typically responsible for paying for the outfit and accessories, so be sure to give them options at different price points. If your wedding budget allows, you can offer to pay for the ring bearer's outfit or provide a gift.

Frequently asked questions