Deborah Chan
Wedding planning is stressful, especially when it comes to deciding on a guest list. It's important to be clear about who is and isn't invited to avoid any confusion or awkward conversations later on. One way to do this is by addressing the wedding invitations correctly, using both outer and inner envelopes. On the outer envelope, address the recipient(s) by name, and on the inner envelope, list the names of those invited, such as children or plus-ones. This ensures that guests understand who is invited and avoids any surprises when it comes to RSVPs.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Number of envelopes | Two (outer and inner) |
| Outer envelope | Addressed to the recipient(s) |
| Inner envelope | Names of those invited |
| RSVP card | Number of seats reserved |
| FAQ on wedding website | Addressing the issue of plus ones |
What You'll Learn
Use inner and outer envelopes to clarify the number of guests invited
Using inner and outer envelopes is a great way to clarify the number of guests invited to your wedding. This method dates back to the olden days when mail was delivered by hand, and the inner envelope would protect the invitation from any damage. Today, the inner envelope is a great way to specify which members of a household are invited to your wedding.
The outer envelope is addressed to the heads of the household in a formal manner, for example, "Mr. and Mrs. Wagner". The inner envelope then lists everyone from that household who is invited in a more informal manner, for instance, "Justin, Maxine, Rob, & Faye". This method helps to eliminate any potential awkwardness regarding your guest list. For example, if you are having an adult-only wedding, the outer envelope would be addressed to the parents, and the inner envelope would specify that only the children over a certain age are invited.
If you are inviting a single friend and would like them to bring a guest, the outer envelope would be addressed to your friend, and the inner envelope would specify "name + guest".
The use of inner and outer envelopes is also beneficial if you are having a formal event and want your invitations to reflect this. It is a great way to set the tone for your wedding, and although it is more expensive, it is a nice touch if you want a very special and elegant invitation.
However, it is not necessary to use both inner and outer envelopes. Many people choose to forgo the inner envelope to save money and paper, and simply address the outer envelope clearly to specify who is invited.
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Specify the number of seats reserved on the RSVP card
When sending out wedding invitations, it is important to be clear about the number of guests invited to avoid any confusion or awkward conversations later on. A great way to do this is by specifying the number of seats reserved on the RSVP card.
The RSVP card, also known as the reply card, is a slip of paper included with each wedding invitation. It allows guests to inform the couple of their attendance, the names of those attending, and any other important information such as food allergies. To avoid any misunderstandings about the number of guests invited, it is recommended to write the guest(s) names on the reply card yourself, leaving no room for them to add additional names.
One effective way to specify the number of seats reserved is to include a section on the RSVP card that says, "We have reserved __ seat(s) in your honour," and fill in the blank with the exact number of people invited. For example, if you are inviting your cousin Mary and she is not allowed to bring a guest, you would write "1 seat." This makes it clear that only the specified number of guests are invited and that additional guests are not permitted.
Another option is to include the names of the invited guests on the RSVP card, along with the number of seats reserved. For example, you can write, "We have reserved ___ seats in the honour of:" followed by the names of the invited guests. This approach ensures that guests understand that the seats are reserved for specific individuals and are not transferable.
It is worth noting that some guests may still inquire about bringing additional guests, even with these clear specifications. In such cases, it is important to kindly and politely reiterate your rule regarding the number of guests invited and stick to your decision.
By specifying the number of seats reserved on the RSVP card, you can effectively communicate the number of guests invited to your wedding and avoid any misunderstandings or surprises when receiving the RSVPs.
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Include an FAQ on your wedding website
FAQs to the rescue!
A wedding website is a great way to share extra information with your guests. FAQs are a brilliant tool to clarify any queries your guests may have, especially regarding the guest list.
Q: Can I bring a plus one to the wedding?
A: We are unable to accommodate plus ones at our wedding due to budget and space limitations. We kindly ask that only named guests attend.
Q: My cousin is getting married soon, and I was wondering if I should invite them to my wedding?
A: We are keeping our guest list limited to those we are closest to. We ask that you only attend if you are named on the invitation.
Q: I have a new partner, can I bring them?
A: We are so happy for you! If your invitation is addressed to you and a guest, then yes, you may bring them along. If not, we kindly ask that you attend solo. We are keeping numbers intimate and are unable to accommodate additional guests.
Q: Can I bring my children?
A: Our wedding is adults-only, so we kindly request that no children attend.
Keep it clear and concise
When writing your FAQ section, it is important to be clear and concise. You don't want to cause any confusion or leave room for interpretation. Be friendly but firm in your answers, and remember to stick to your guest list rules. It may be helpful to include a sentence at the end of each answer, thanking your guests for their understanding and cooperation.
A note on wording
When addressing your invitations, be mindful of the wording you use. For example, if you are inviting a couple with children, address the invitation to "Mr and Mrs John and Sarah Smith", making it obvious that only the two named people are invited. If a guest is single and you are happy for them to bring a plus one, you can write "Miss Sarah Barnes and Guest".
Be prepared for queries
Even with an FAQ section, some guests may still reach out with queries or requests to bring additional guests. It is a good idea to prepare responses to these queries, sticking to your guest list rules and budget constraints. Remember, it is your wedding, and you are not obligated to invite anyone out of obligation.
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Address families with specific names, not as a collective
When addressing wedding invitations to families, it is important to be clear about who is invited. Avoid addressing the invitation to "the [family name]" as this is too ambiguous and may result in misunderstandings about whether children are included. Instead, list each family member's name on the inner envelope. If you are inviting children under the age of 18, girls can be addressed as "Miss".
On the outer envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. John and Sarah Smith"
On the inner envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith, Miss Sally Smith, Mr. Jacob Smith"
If you are inviting a family with children over the age of 18, each person should receive their own invitation. Here is an example of how to address an invitation to a family with a parent and an adult child:
On the outer envelope: "Ms. Audrey Abraham"
On the inner envelope: "Ms. Abraham"
If you are inviting a family with children under and over 18, you can address the parents and younger children on the outer and inner envelopes, and send a separate invitation to the adult child.
If you are inviting a large family and want to save on the number of invitations, you can address the outer envelope to "The [Family Name]" and list all the invited family members' names on the inner envelope. However, be sure to include each person's name to avoid any confusion.
On the outer envelope: "The Thompson Family"
On the inner envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. Alan Thompson, Roger Thompson, Chance Thompson, Miss Jennifer Thompson, Miss Lily Thompson"
Remember, it is always best to be as clear and specific as possible when addressing wedding invitations to families to avoid any misunderstandings or hurt feelings.
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Be mindful of the wording when inviting couples
When it comes to inviting couples to your wedding, it's important to be mindful of the wording on the invitation to avoid any confusion or awkward situations. Here are some tips to help you clarify who is invited:
Use Inner and Outer Envelopes: Traditionally, wedding invitations have an outer and inner envelope. The outer envelope is addressed to the recipient, usually the couple, such as "Mr. and Mrs. Jonathan Smith." The inner envelope is where you specify the names of those invited. For example, if you want to invite only Mr. and Mrs. Smith, you would include their names on the inner envelope. If they are invited with a plus-one, you can write "Mr. and Mrs. Smith and guest." This method ensures that your guests understand exactly who is invited.
Be Clear with Guest's Names: When inviting a couple, be sure to include both of their names on the invitation. For example, if you are inviting Ms. Kathryn Blake and her partner, Mr. Chris Albert, address the invitation to both of them by name. This indicates that only those two individuals are invited. If you want to allow Ms. Blake to bring a different guest in case of a breakup or unavailability of Mr. Albert, you can address the invitation to "Ms. Kathryn Blake and guest."
Specify the Number of Seats: Another way to clarify the number of invited guests is to include a statement on the RSVP card, such as "___ seats have been reserved in your honor." For example, if you are inviting a couple without their children, you can write "2 seats have been reserved in your honor," making it clear that only the two named individuals are expected to attend.
Use Proper Titles: When addressing married couples, it is customary to use their titles, such as "Mr. and Mrs." followed by their last name. This is a clear indication that both spouses are invited. For unmarried couples living together, you can address them as "Ms." or "Mr." followed by their individual last names.
Consider a Blanket Rule for Plus-Ones: To avoid any potential drama or hurt feelings, consider having a blanket rule for plus-ones. Either allow every guest to bring a plus-one or disallow it altogether. This way, you can avoid situations where one cousin is allowed a plus-one while another is not, which may lead to resentment.
Communicate in Advance: Before sending out invitations, you can casually mention your "no plus-ones" rule during conversations about your wedding plans. Explain that your venue is small or that you are trying to stick to a strict budget. This way, your guests will be aware of the limitations beforehand.
By following these tips, you can ensure that your wedding invitations are clear and concise, avoiding any misunderstandings or awkward situations. It's important to be mindful of the wording to create a smooth and enjoyable experience for both you and your guests.
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Frequently asked questions
On the outer envelope, address it as usual, to Mr. and Mrs. Jonathan Smith, along with their address. On the inner envelope, include only the names of those invited (no address is necessary). This is your opportunity to specify the names of those invited.
Address the invitation to "Mr. and Mrs. Jonathan Smith". This should make it obvious that only the two named people are expected to attend.
You can mention that your venue is fairly small or that you're trying to stick to a budget. You can also make it clear on the RSVP card by writing your guest(s) names on the reply card yourself, leaving no room for them to add anyone else.
You can invite only close friends and family members to the ceremony and wedding breakfast, leaving you free to invite more people, including plus ones, to the evening party. Be sure to make this crystal clear by including a note on your invitation or note card.
If you know the name of the person your guest is dating, you can include their name on the inner envelope. If you don't know their name, you can write "and guest" on the envelope.
