Requesting Cash Gifts: Etiquette For Indian Wedding Invites

While it may be considered rude to ask for cash gifts for your wedding, there are ways to politely hint at your preference. One way is to include a small registry with a few items you actually want, and most guests will get the hint and give you cash. Another option is to address it on your wedding website, where you can explain why you've registered for cash and how you'll use the funds. You could also ask your family and friends to spread the word that you would prefer cash gifts. This option may be risky, as it doesn't give you much control over the message, but it can be effective if you know your family will be tactful. Finally, you can include a line on your wedding invitations around gifting or having a wishing well, but this is a direct option that may not be suitable for everyone.

Asking for cash on wedding invitations

When it comes to Indian weddings, it is considered rude to ask for cash or any kind of gift on your wedding invitations. Here are some alternative ways to ask for monetary gifts:

Wedding Website

Create a wedding website and include a section for your "registry". Explain why you prefer monetary gifts and how you plan to use the money. For example, you could say: "Your presence at our wedding is a gift in itself. However, if you wish to give us something, we would greatly appreciate a contribution towards our honeymoon."

Spread the Word

Inform your close friends and family members that you would prefer cash gifts and encourage them to spread the word discreetly. Guests often approach family members or friends of the couple for gift ideas, so they can suggest monetary gifts when asked.

Set Up a Honeymoon/House Deposit/Home Improvement Fund

Use a gift registry service to set up a specific fund for your honeymoon, house deposit, or home improvements. Guests can then contribute money towards your chosen fund. Some services also allow you to register for a few physical gifts as well.

Poems or Notes with Invitations

Although it is not recommended to ask for gifts on the invitations, some couples include a subtle poem or note expressing their preference for cash gifts. For example: "We know it's not traditional, it's not the way it's done, but instead of a wedding gift, we'd like a bit of sun [on our honeymoon]!"

Using a wedding website to ask for cash

It is considered rude to ask for cash gifts on your wedding invitation. Instead, you can include the address of your wedding website on an insert card within your stationery suite and detail your registry preferences there. Here are some tips for using your wedding website to ask for cash gifts:

Be specific about how you'll use the cash

Explain to your guests where the money will go. If you're in the middle of a big project, like renovating your home or moving across the country, let your guests know about it on your wedding website. Adding a personal touch with the story of how the project started, how far along it is, and any challenges you've faced along the way will make your guests feel more connected to your lives and more inclined to help.

Use a cash or honeymoon registry website

While some guests will prefer to bring cash or a cheque to the wedding reception, others may appreciate the opportunity to make a financial contribution via a registry. There are several cash registry websites available, such as Honeyfund and Zola, where guests can give monetary gifts that can be used for long-term projects, building savings, or booking a honeymoon.

Be sure to create a traditional registry, too

Even though you prefer cash gifts, it's recommended to have a small traditional registry as well. You're likely to have some guests who prefer to give physical gifts, and having a registry will make the process easier for them (and for you). Register for a small selection of items you truly want to avoid receiving gifts from a variety of retailers, making it challenging to keep track of what you've received and return or exchange duplicates.

Let your family and friends spread the word

Inform your parents, siblings, wedding party members, and close friends about your preference for cash gifts and why. Encourage them to tactfully spread the word. Chances are, guests will ask them what to get you, and they can suggest that guests contribute to your savings fund instead.

Word your wedding website thoughtfully

When explaining your preference for cash gifts on your wedding website, be mindful of your wording. Attach your cash gift request to a specific goal to help gift-givers feel like their money will have more meaning. For example: "Your presence at our wedding is enough of a gift, but should you wish to buy us something, we'd greatly appreciate a contribution towards our [insert cash fund]."

Spreading the word through family and friends

While it is considered rude to ask for cash gifts on your wedding invitation, there are other ways to spread the word. One way is to utilise your social network, especially those closest to you, such as your parents, siblings, wedding party members, and close friends. Inform them of your preference for cash gifts and encourage them to tactfully pass this information on. This method is often effective as guests will likely approach your close family and friends with questions about gift ideas.

When informing your inner circle, be sure to explain your reasons for preferring cash gifts. For example, you may be saving for a honeymoon, a kitchen remodel, or a down payment on a new home. This way, when guests ask your family and friends for gift suggestions, they can recommend contributing to your savings fund instead of a physical gift.

You can also ask your close network to share details about your plans for the future. For instance, if you're planning to renovate your home or move across the country, your family and friends can let guests know about these upcoming changes in your life. This helps to create a more personal connection between your guests and your plans, making them feel more inclined to contribute financially.

Additionally, consider providing your family and friends with specific wording or phrases they can use when speaking to guests about gift options. This ensures that your preferences are communicated consistently and tactfully.

By spreading the word through your social network, you can tactfully convey your preference for cash gifts while maintaining the etiquette and sensitivity surrounding this topic.

Setting up a cash fund with a gift registry service

Choosing a Gift Registry Service

Start by selecting a reputable gift registry service that suits your needs. Popular options include MyRegistry.com and Honeyfund. These platforms are specifically designed to help couples receive monetary gifts in a tasteful manner. They also offer features such as customisation options, secure payment methods, and the ability to fund different types of projects or experiences.

Creating an Account and Setting Up Your Cash Fund

Once you've chosen a platform, create an account and familiarise yourself with their processes. You will likely need to connect your bank account or a PayPal account to receive the funds. Some platforms may charge nominal fees or require a minimum balance, so be sure to read the fine print. Name your cash fund something personal and meaningful, such as 'Honeymoon Fund' or 'Dream Home Fund'.

Customising Your Fund and Adding Personal Touches

Make your fund unique by customising it to reflect your personality and the purpose of the cash gifts. You can add details about your plans, such as your dream honeymoon destinations or home renovation projects. Sharing your story and including personal touches will make your guests feel more connected to your goals and more inclined to contribute.

Sharing Your Registry with Guests

After setting up your cash fund, you'll want to share it with your wedding guests. Include a link to your registry on your wedding website or insert cards within your wedding stationery suite. Spread the word through your family members and close friends, who can tactfully inform other guests about your preference for cash gifts and the reason behind it.

Following Up and Expressing Gratitude

Remember to periodically check your cash fund balance and keep track of contributions. Be sure to thank your guests for their generosity, whether they gave monetary gifts or physical presents. Sending written thank-you notes within a few months of your wedding day is a thoughtful way to express your appreciation.

By following these steps, you can effectively set up a cash fund with a gift registry service, ensuring a smooth and tasteful process for receiving cash gifts on your Indian wedding invitation.

Poems or lines to politely ask for cash

While it is considered rude to ask for gifts or cash on a wedding invitation, there are tactful ways to do so. One way is to include a cute, polite, and indirect wedding money poem in the invitation. Here are some poem ideas to politely ask for cash:

Poems for Couples Who Already Live Together

As we’ve lived together for a year or two,

We really don’t need anything new.

But if you were thinking of getting us a small wedding gift,

Some money for our future wouldn’t go amiss.

We haven’t included a gift list in our invite,

As we have everything — it just wasn’t right…

To ask for more things for the life we lead,

When a reliable new car is just what we need!

If you were thinking of a gift for us to start our married life,

Some money would make us a very happy [husband/wife] and wife!

Poems for Couples Buying a New Home

As we’re getting married we thought it would be fun,

To move into a brand new home — we need to get it done.

As wedding gifts are bulky and we’re a little short on space,

Some money would be the ideal gift to help us buy our place!

We’ll soon be saying ‘I Do’,

And for a gift, if you haven’t got a clue,

Then we’d really love some cash,

So that for our home we can splash,

Out on a cosy new bed for two!

Poems for Honeymoon Contributions

We’ve just moved home and have filled it with stuff,

From books to sofas, we’ve certainly got enough!

Instead of more wine glasses, we’d really love some cash,

So that we can book a perfect honeymoon and head off in a dash.

A romantic beach break would really do the trick,

As soon as we can afford it, we’ll be on that plane quick!

We can’t wait to spend our wedding day with you,

We’ve been planning hard and spending money for a good year or two.

As we’re keen to start our married life in style,

An amazing honeymoon would really make us smile.

Instead of a gift list from a high street shop,

We’d really love some money so on a beach we can flop!

Your financial donation would truly mean a lot,

So thank you for contributing to our honeymoon pot!

Other Poem Ideas

If a gift is on your mind,

A contribution would be kind.

It will help us more than words can say,

To celebrate our special day!

If a gift is your intention,

We thought that we would mention,

We'd love some pennies to rub together,

To save for something we will treasure!

We know it’s not traditional

It’s not the way it’s done

But instead of a wedding gift

We’d like a bit of sun!

We are sending out this invitation,

And hope you will join our celebration.

If to send a gift is your intention,

In modesty we would like to mention,

We have already got a kettle and a toaster,

Crockery, dinner mats and coasters,

So rather than something we have already got,

Please give us money for our savings pot.

But, most importantly, we request,

That you turn up as our wedding guest.

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