Best Man's Wedding Gift Guide: How Much To Spend

There are many factors that determine how much the best man should spend on a wedding gift, including budget, relationship with the couple, and the cost of attending the wedding. While there is no hard-and-fast rule, wedding experts advise that cash gifts should start at $100 and can go up to $500 based on the factors mentioned. The average person spends $50 to $100 on a wedding gift, with close friends and family members spending $100 to $150 or more. However, it's important to note that the gift should not be expected to cover the cost of attendance, and the best man has likely already spent a significant amount on the wedding. Ultimately, the best man should give what they feel comfortable with and what fits within their budget.

How much to give depending on your relationship with the couple

How much you give as a wedding gift depends on a range of factors, including your budget, your relationship with the couple, and the cost of attending the wedding.

Close Friends and Family

If you are very close to the couple, you may want to be more generous with your gift. This could be anywhere from $100 to $500, with an average of $200 for close friends and $400-$600 for close family members. If you are part of the wedding party, you might also want to consider giving a larger gift, as you will be contributing to their big day in a more significant way.

Colleagues and Acquaintances

For colleagues or more distant acquaintances, a smaller gift in the range of $50 to $150 is generally appropriate. If you have worked with the person for a long time or feel particularly close to them, you might consider giving a gift on the higher end of this range.

Other Factors to Consider

In addition to your relationship with the couple, other factors can influence the amount you give. For example, if you are attending with a plus-one, you may want to give a larger gift. Similarly, if you are hosting a bridal shower or have already given an engagement gift, you may want to adjust the amount you give accordingly.

Ultimately, the most important consideration is your budget and what you can comfortably afford. Wedding gifts are not meant to be a financial burden, so give what you can, and don't worry about trying to keep up with others.

How much to give depending on your budget

If you're on a tight budget

If you're on a tight budget, don't worry—there's no need to break the bank to show your appreciation for the happy couple. Here are some suggestions for more affordable gifts:

• A thoughtful, creative, or personalised gift that doesn't cost a lot but shows you care. For example, a framed picture, a book, or something sentimental that reminds them of a shared memory.
• Offer your skills or services as a gift. For instance, you could offer to be the wedding photographer, help with hair and makeup, or provide entertainment for the day.
• Group gift: If you're part of the wedding party, consider joining forces with the other bridesmaids or groomsmen to purchase a bigger-ticket item that you know the couple will love. This way, you can contribute a smaller amount while still giving a generous gift.
• Gift card: If the couple's registry items are out of your budget, consider getting them a gift card to one of the stores where they registered. This way, they can put it towards something they truly want.
• Cover your plate: As a guest, you can consider gifting an amount that covers the cost of your meal and drinks at the reception. This is usually around $50–$100.

If you have a medium budget

If you have a bit more wiggle room in your budget, you can consider the following options:

• Cash gift: While there's no minimum or maximum amount, the average person spends around $100 on a wedding gift. For close friends or family members, you may want to increase this to $100–$150 or more.
• Honeymoon fund: Contribute to the couple's honeymoon fund to help them create memorable experiences, such as a romantic dinner or a couple's massage.
• Engagement, bridal shower, and wedding gifts: If you're attending multiple pre-wedding events, you can spread your budget across these occasions. Consider the 60-20-20 rule, allocating 20% of your budget to an engagement gift, 20% to a bridal shower gift, and 60% to the actual wedding gift.
• Pre-wedding expenses: If you're part of the wedding party, you may be spending a significant amount on pre-wedding expenses such as the bachelor/bachelorette party, attire, and travel. In this case, it's perfectly acceptable to reduce the amount you spend on a gift or even forgo a gift altogether.

If money is no issue

If you have a generous budget and want to spoil the happy couple, here are some ideas:

• Sentimental value: Sometimes, the most meaningful gifts are those that hold sentimental value. Consider a gift that reminds the couple of a shared memory, a special date, or an inside joke.
• Luxury items: If the couple has a registry, you can choose a more expensive item from their list. Alternatively, you can opt for a luxury item you know they will appreciate, such as a fancy coffee machine or a high-quality suit steamer.
• Customised or personalised gifts: Go the extra mile with a customised or personalised gift that's tailored specifically for the couple.
• Cover their expenses: If you're feeling extremely generous, you could offer to cover some of the wedding expenses, such as the wedding rings or the bride's dress. However, this is not a common expectation and should only be done if you're in a position to do so without strain.

How much to give depending on the cost of attending the wedding

The amount you spend on a wedding gift depends on a variety of factors, including your budget, your relationship with the couple, and the cost of attending the wedding.

If you are the best man, you may have already spent a significant amount of money on wedding-related expenses such as a tux rental, travel costs, and parties. In this case, it is perfectly acceptable not to provide a gift at all. However, if you can afford it and want to give a monetary gift, there are a few things to consider when determining the appropriate amount.

Firstly, traditional etiquette suggests that your gift should cover the cost of your attendance, including the cost of your meal at the reception. This is typically considered the bare minimum and can be used as a starting point. For context, the average cost per wedding guest in 2023 was $304, while the average monetary gift that year was $160.

Secondly, your relationship with the couple matters. Generally, the closer you are to the bride and groom, the more you should consider giving. If you are the best man, you likely fall into the "close friend" category, and guests in this category spent an average of $200 on monetary gifts in 2023. However, if you have already spent a lot on wedding-related expenses, you may want to give a lower amount or opt for a more sentimental gift.

Lastly, your budget should be a key consideration. Wedding experts advise starting cash gifts at $100 and adjusting upwards to $500 based on your budget and relationship with the couple.

In summary, while there is no hard-and-fast rule, considering these factors can help you determine an appropriate gift amount. If you are the best man, it is essential to remember that your presence and support are already valuable gifts, and any additional contribution is entirely at your discretion.

Whether to give cash or a gift

Giving Cash

Giving cash as a wedding gift is a convenient and flexible option for the best man. It allows the couple to use the money as they see fit, whether it's for their honeymoon, new home, or other expenses. Cash gifts are also straightforward and eliminate the risk of choosing a gift that the couple may not want or need.

The amount of cash you give can vary depending on your financial situation and closeness to the groom. While some people suggest giving enough cash to "cover your plate," this is not an etiquette rule and should not be expected, especially if you've already spent a significant amount on the bachelor party, tux rental, and other wedding-related expenses. A modest cash gift of around $100 to $200 is generally considered acceptable, but you can give more if you are financially comfortable and want to be more generous.

Giving a Gift

Giving a thoughtful gift can be a more personal and memorable way to show your appreciation to the groom. It demonstrates that you've taken the time to consider their interests and choose something unique. When selecting a gift, consider the groom's hobbies, personality, and preferences. For example, if they enjoy cooking, you could gift them a high-quality cookbook or a unique kitchen gadget.

Personalised gifts, such as customised cufflinks, a money clip, or a whisky glass, are also a great way to add a special touch and make the gift more meaningful. If you're worried about the gift not being used or appreciated, you can always include a small token gift along with a more substantial cash gift.

Cultural and Regional Differences

It's important to note that gift-giving traditions can vary depending on cultural and regional backgrounds. For example, in certain cultures or regions, like Italian backgrounds in New Jersey, it may be customary to give larger cash gifts, such as $300 per couple or $500 for bridal party participants. In such cases, it's essential to consider the expectations and traditions of the couple and their families to ensure your gift is appropriate and well-received.

Whether you choose to give cash or a gift as the best man, the most important thing is to show your appreciation and support for the groom. Consider your budget, the couple's preferences, and any cultural or regional traditions when making your decision. Ultimately, it's the thought and effort behind the gift that counts, so choose something that comes from the heart and aligns with your relationship.

Whether to give a group gift

If the couple has a wedding registry, you could join forces with a group of friends to purchase a more expensive item that you know they will love. This is a wise way to gift, as the couple will receive a thoughtful big-ticket present, and each person can usually contribute a smaller amount individually. This option is especially helpful if you have already spent a significant amount of money on wedding-related expenses, such as the bachelor party, your attire, and other events.

If you are close to the couple and have the financial means, you may want to give a more substantial individual gift. According to wedding experts, cash gifts are often preferred, as they can help newlyweds afford their honeymoon or pay off wedding bills. The amount you give will depend on your budget and your relationship with the couple. For a close friend, you might consider giving between $100 and $500, or even more if you are financially comfortable.

Ultimately, the decision to give a group gift or an individual gift is a personal one and should be based on your own circumstances and the couple's preferences.

Frequently asked questions