The Perfect Wedding Party Size

Bridesmaids and groomsmen are an important part of a wedding ceremony. They are the bride and groom's closest family members and friends, who they want by their side on their special day. The number of bridesmaids and groomsmen can vary depending on the couple's preference, ranging from just one best woman and best man to a larger group of ten or more. While their primary role is to offer emotional support and companionship, they also have various responsibilities and duties, such as planning pre-wedding events, offering practical help, and giving toasts to honour the newlyweds.

How to choose your wedding party

Choosing your wedding party is an important part of the wedding planning process. Here are some tips to help you select your bridesmaids and groomsmen:

Include your siblings:

If you have siblings, it is a nice gesture to include them in your wedding party. If they are much younger, you can give them other roles such as ushers or junior attendants. Alternatively, if you are particularly close to your siblings, you may want to give them a more prominent role as a bridesmaid or groomsman. Remember, there is no rule that says a bride cannot have her brother as a bridesman or a groom his sister as a groomslady.

Emphasise reliability:

Choose friends or family members who are reliable and responsive. You will need to be able to count on your wedding party to be there for you throughout the planning process and on the big day itself. Look for people who are organised, punctual, and good at communication.

Consider personalities:

Think about how your chosen bridesmaids and groomsmen will get along with each other. It is not necessary for them all to be best friends, but you will want to avoid any potential drama or clashes of personality that could cause stress on your wedding day. Aim for a group that is friendly, cordial, and able to transition easily between different groups of people.

Be mindful of budgets:

Being a bridesmaid or groomsman can be expensive, with costs for attire, gifts, travel, and parties all adding up. If you know that a close friend or family member is in a tight financial spot, have an honest conversation with them about their budget before asking them to be in your wedding party. There are also alternative, less expensive ways to involve them in your wedding, such as having them be a reader, give a toast at the rehearsal dinner, or act as an usher.

Think about feelings:

Deciding who to include in your wedding party can be tricky, and you may not be able to include everyone you would like without hurting some feelings. Sometimes, having a smaller wedding party can be a good solution, as this reduces the number of people left out. However, if you are set on having a large wedding party, it is generally better to include someone on the fringe than to leave them out, as this could cause hurt feelings.

Remember, your wedding party is there to support you and celebrate your special day with you. Choose people who you are closest to and who will be honoured to stand by your side as you say "I do".

Bridesmaids' and groomsmen's responsibilities

While the number of groomsmen and bridesmaids in a wedding party is flexible, their responsibilities are more clearly defined. Bridesmaids and groomsmen are chosen from among the couple's closest friends and family members, and they play a significant role in both the planning process and the wedding day itself.

The main role of a bridesmaid is to assist the Maid of Honour with her wedding planning duties and offer additional help to the bride as needed. Bridesmaids are responsible for providing emotional support to the bride throughout the entire process, from planning to the ceremony. They also assist the Maid of Honour in planning and paying for the bridal shower and bachelorette party, as well as helping with decorations and keeping records of gifts. On the wedding day, they help the bride get ready, double-checking her hair, veil, and accessories. They also coordinate any day-of communications with vendors and guests, walk down the aisle, and attend to wedding guests, encouraging interactions and dancing.

Groomsmen, on the other hand, serve as a support system for the Best Man and the groom. They assist the Best Man in planning all pre-wedding events and the ceremony, attending these events, such as the engagement party, bachelor party, rehearsal, and rehearsal dinner. Groomsmen are also responsible for running errands for the group, gathering items for the bachelor party, and ensuring the Best Man and groom are ready for the ceremony. They arrive early to greet and usher guests to their seats, distribute wedding programs, and escort bridesmaids down the aisle.

Both bridesmaids and groomsmen play a crucial role in honouring the couple and providing support and companionship. They are there to ensure the couple's special day runs smoothly and joyfully, sharing in the celebration and creating lasting memories.

The history of bridesmaids and groomsmen

The tradition of bridesmaids and groomsmen dates back to ancient Rome, where ten witnesses were required to be present at a wedding under Roman law. These witnesses were all men, but female attendants escorted the bride to the groom's home for the ceremony.

The first bridesmaids appeared even before ancient Rome, in the Bible story of Jacob's marriage to Leah and Rachel. Each wife brought a female servant to the ceremony; they were literally the brides' maids.

Groomsmen, on the other hand, have a darker history. Their role originated from marriages by capture, where the bride was abducted from her family. Groomsmen were called the Bride's Knights, and they either helped carry the bride away from her disapproving relatives or, in a more troubling scenario, were the bride's kidnappers. The best man is believed to have originated with the 16th-century Germanic Goths, where he played the role of the groom's companion in abducting the bride.

In ancient Rome, bridesmaids and groomsmen wore identical outfits to the bride and groom to protect them from evil spirits and jealous suitors. Over time, these superstitions faded, and bridesmaids' dresses evolved, especially after the Victorian era, when dyes became more available. Today, bridesmaids' dresses vary in colour and style, no longer resembling the bride's gown.

The primary role of groomsmen has also evolved from protecting the bride and her dowry to more light-hearted duties, such as planning the bachelor party and escorting guests to their seats. Similarly, the maid of honour, or matron of honour if she is married, now provides emotional and logistical support to the bride, toasting the couple, and handling wedding day details.

How to coordinate bridesmaids and groomsmen

Coordinating your bridesmaids and groomsmen is a pivotal part of wedding planning and can be super simple. Here is a step-by-step guide on how to coordinate your wedding party:

Determine Your Wedding Colour Palette

The first step to coordinating your bridesmaids and groomsmen is to pick out your wedding colours and overall theme. Your wedding colours will be used throughout your big day, so it's essential to spend some time on this decision. You're not limited to two or three colours. It is common to have primary wedding colours and secondary 'accent' colours. This gives you endless possibilities for what fun things you might want to tie in creatively. We recommend choosing 3-5 colours for your wedding palette, which guarantees colours that both you and your partner will love.

Pick Your Primary Wedding Colours

After you've identified your wedding palette colours, it's time to solidify 1-2 primary colours. These are the colours seen predominantly throughout your ceremony space and will help determine what colours you choose for your bridesmaids and groomsmen. Consider what your primary colour would look like as a suit or a dress to make sure you love it. One of the most common ways to coordinate your wedding party is to use your primary colour for the bridesmaid dresses and the groomsmen's accessories, such as their ties, pocket squares, and even socks!

Decide on Your Bridesmaids' Dress Colours

Use your chosen primary colours to determine what your bridesmaids will wear. Often, brides and grooms choose to have their favourite wedding colour worn by the bridesmaids. Remember, the colour your bridesmaids wear will be shown off in all your wedding photos! For a more dynamic look, consider using some secondary colours in your bridesmaid dress lineup. Mixing and matching your bridesmaid dresses is a unique way to make your bridesmaids feel extra special and is a great way to incorporate more of your wedding colours.

Choose What Colour Your Groomsmen Will Wear

When choosing your groomsmen's outfits, remember to keep it simple. Stick to neutral colours like a grey or black suit and add pops of colour with their accessories. This will make your wedding party look cohesive and coordinated, rather than overly matched.

Match Your Bridesmaids and Groomsmen

All you have to do now is choose one element that will remain the same between the two sides of the wedding party. This could be colour, a colour pattern, or a particular print. When selecting your element, the outfits should complement each other. For example, you might choose to have the bridesmaids' dress colour match the groomsmen's ties. Ordering samples of your chosen elements for your bridesmaids and groomsmen is a perfect way to look at the colours together and make coordinating super easy and stress-free.

The most important thing when coordinating bridesmaids and groomsmen is to think about how you want your wedding day to feel. The colours you choose for your wedding party play an essential role in the mood and personality of your big day. Your wedding party consists of people in your life who support you and your partner the most, and putting in the effort for them to look amazing on the big day lets them know just how much they mean to you.

Walking down the aisle

Number of Groomsmen and Bridesmaids

The number of groomsmen and bridesmaids you choose is entirely up to you. Some couples prefer to have a large wedding party with several groomsmen and bridesmaids, while others opt for a more intimate group. There is no right or wrong answer, and you can choose based on your personal preferences and the dynamics of your friend group. Keep in mind that a smaller group may be easier to coordinate and can help simplify the planning process. On the other hand, a larger wedding party can create a more vibrant and festive atmosphere.

Coordinating the Wedding Party

When it comes to the processional, you'll want to decide whether your groomsmen and bridesmaids will walk together or separately. There is no set rule, and you can choose whichever option works best for your wedding. Walking together can create a sense of unity and balance, especially if you have an even number of groomsmen and bridesmaids. It can also make the processional feel more dynamic and engaging for your guests. Walking separately can be a good option if you want to highlight each individual member of the wedding party. It can also be a solution if you have an odd number of groomsmen and bridesmaids, ensuring that no one walks alone.

Creating a Seamless Processional

To ensure a smooth and seamless processional, it's important to consider the logistics and timing. If your wedding party is walking in pairs, they should be properly introduced and comfortable walking together. They should also be clear on the timing and pace of their walk, ensuring that they don't rush or lag behind. For a solo walk, each person should be confident and prepared, especially if they are carrying a bouquet or other items. It's a good idea to rehearse the processional beforehand to iron out any potential issues and create a cohesive flow.

Adding Personal Touches

The processional is also an opportunity to showcase your creativity and add personal touches to your wedding. You can incorporate music, decorations, or other elements that reflect your style and theme. Consider unique ways to introduce your wedding party, such as a fun introduction or a creative entrance. The processional is a build-up to the main event, so feel free to make it memorable and enjoyable for everyone involved.

Other Roles for the Wedding Party

Remember that your groomsmen and bridesmaids can also take on other roles besides walking down the aisle. They can be ushers, ceremony readers, processional escorts, or witnesses for the marriage license. They can also assist with decorations, greet and usher guests, distribute wedding programs, and coordinate communications with vendors. On your wedding day, don't hesitate to lean on your wedding party for support and assistance. They are there to celebrate with you and ensure that your special day runs smoothly.

Frequently asked questions