Bridesmaids: Capturing Their Unique Beauty In Words

A bridesmaid is an unmarried woman who attends the bride at a wedding ceremony. Bridesmaids are generally the most important people in the bride's circle of loved ones, such as best friends or relatives. They are part of the wedding party, which usually consists of the maid or matron of honour, best man, groomsmen, and other attendants chosen by the couple. The role of a bridesmaid has evolved over time, and today, they are chosen based on their close relationship and friendship with the bride.

The history of bridesmaids

Ancient Times to the Victorian Era:

One of the earliest known references to bridesmaids can be found in the Bible, in the story of Jacob and his two wives, Leah and Rachel. In this story, the brides were escorted to the wedding by their servants, who acted as their maids. In ancient times, bridesmaids were not friends or relatives of the bride but rather domestic workers who catered to her every need during the wedding.

In ancient Rome and feudal China, brides often had to travel long distances to their groom's town, making them vulnerable to attack by bandits or rival suitors. As a result, bridesmaids began to dress identically to the bride to confuse evil spirits and jealous suitors, thus protecting the bride from harm. Roman law also required 10 witnesses to be present at a wedding, which contributed to the concept of a bridal party.

The Victorian Era:

The wedding of Queen Victoria and Prince Albert in 1840 marked a significant shift in bridesmaid fashion. Queen Victoria's 12 bridesmaids wore matching white dresses to complement the Queen's satin gown. This started the tradition of royal brides wearing white instead of silver, and the main goal of bridesmaid attire became to not outshine the bride.

Modern Times:

In modern times, the role of bridesmaids has evolved significantly. Bridesmaids are now typically chosen based on their close relationship and friendship with the bride, rather than their domestic worker status. They are still expected to provide emotional support and practical assistance to the bride, but the specific duties and costs associated with being a bridesmaid have become more flexible and varied.

Additionally, modern bridal parties are no longer restricted by gender, allowing couples to choose their wedding party based on their relationships rather than outdated rules. Bridesmaids' fashion has also become more flexible, with brides often allowing their bridesmaids to choose their own dresses or mix and match styles.

Choosing what to wear

In the past, bridesmaids wore similar dresses to the bride, often with veils, to confuse evil spirits or jealous suitors and to protect the bride from being identified by kidnappers. This tradition dates back to Queen Victoria, who wore white, as did her attendants, at her wedding to Prince Albert in 1840. In the first half of the 20th century, bridesmaids often wore hats and gloves, and later, puffy sleeves and shiny satin.

Today, brides are more likely to let their bridesmaids choose their own dresses and mix and match styles, although white bridesmaid dresses are back in fashion.

The main goal of bridesmaid attire is not to outshine the bride, but to complement her and the wedding theme. It is also important to consider comfort and practicality, as bridesmaids will be busy on the day and may need to travel or dance in their outfits.

Planning pre-wedding events

Engagement Parties:

Engagement parties are often the first pre-wedding celebration, offering an intimate gathering to announce the upcoming nuptials to relatives and friends. While not mandatory, they are a wonderful way to share the joy of the occasion. Traditionally hosted by the bride's parents, engagement parties can also be organised by any close relative or friend of the couple. It is common to have separate celebrations for family and friends, with the family party usually taking precedence. These parties are typically held one to three months after the engagement, but they can also be immediate, depending on the length of the engagement.

Bridal Showers:

Bridal showers, also known as wedding showers, are a chance for the bride's close friends and family to gather and shower her with gifts, games, food, and fun. In the past, these showers served as a way for less affluent brides to receive dowry money, but today, they are more lighthearted affairs. The bridal shower is usually organised by a close friend, family member, or a combination of both, and it can take the form of an all-female celebration or a couple's shower, where the groom and his entourage also attend. These showers typically occur one to three months before the wedding, and it is considered good etiquette to only invite guests who will also be invited to the wedding.

Bachelorette Parties:

The bachelorette party is the bride's chance to let loose and celebrate her upcoming nuptials with her closest friends. It can take the form of a relaxing staycation, a trip to a favourite city, or any activity the bride enjoys. The planning is usually led by the maid of honour, and it is customary for all attendees to contribute financially. This celebration is typically held one to four months before the wedding, giving enough time for guests to make travel arrangements if needed.

Bridal Brunch/Bridesmaids Luncheon:

The bridal brunch, also known as the bridesmaids luncheon, is a small gathering hosted by the bride a few days before the wedding. It is an opportunity for the bride to thank the bridesmaids and other women who have supported her during the planning process. The event can also be hosted or co-hosted by mothers, in-laws, or other female relatives, and they may invite a few friends who are also attending the wedding.

Rehearsal Dinner:

The rehearsal dinner is a crucial pre-wedding event, allowing the wedding party and families to get acquainted in a relaxed setting. It is usually held the night before the wedding, though some couples opt for two nights before to allow for a buffer. While not mandatory, a well-planned rehearsal dinner can enhance the overall experience for everyone involved. Traditionally, the groom's parents plan and pay for this event, but nowadays, it is common for both sets of parents to contribute or for the couple to organise it themselves.

Welcome Party:

The welcome party is the final hurrah before the big day. It is open to all wedding guests but is not mandatory. This celebration is another opportunity for out-of-town guests to mingle and get to know each other, adding to the excitement and camaraderie of the wedding festivities.

Remember, as a bridesmaid, your role is to support the bride and ensure she feels loved and celebrated during this special time. Each celebration is an opportunity to create memories and share in the joy of the upcoming nuptials.

The bridal shower

Planning the Bridal Shower

Guest List and Invitations

The guest list for the bridal shower usually includes the bridal party, the couple's family, and close friends. It is important to note that only those invited to the wedding should be invited to the bridal shower. Invitations should be sent out four to six weeks in advance, including the bride's name, date, time, location, registry information, RSVP details, and the names of the hosts.

Food and Drinks

The food and drinks served at the bridal shower can vary depending on the theme and time of day. Brunch affairs might include mimosas and breakfast foods, while other showers might feature cake and candy buffets or afternoon tea with cupcakes and cookies.

Games and Activities

Gifts

As a gift-giving occasion, everyone who attends the bridal shower is expected to bring a small gift, usually something for the bedroom or the kitchen, with a price range of $50-$75. The host is also expected to give the bride a small, meaningful gift.

Dress Code

The dress code for the bridal shower can vary from formal to casual, but it is generally better to dress up than down. The bride can opt for a little white dress or choose from a variety of stylish options available.

Duties on the wedding day

On the wedding day, bridesmaids are expected to help ensure everything goes smoothly for the bride, the maid of honour, and most of the wedding guests. Here are some of the duties bridesmaids should carry out on the day:

• Get ready with the bride: Bridesmaids should arrive at the designated location on time and help the bride with anything she needs. This could include answering calls and texts, making sure she eats and stays hydrated, pouring drinks, and helping her into her dress, shoes, and jewellery.
• Provide snacks and drinks: If no other arrangements have been made, bridesmaids should provide snacks and drinks for the bridal party and anyone else involved in the preparations, such as the photographer and stylists.
• Be the "bride tribe": Bridesmaids should act as a support crew for the bride and the maid of honour. They can also serve as a point of contact for guests and vendors. They should ensure all members of the wedding party and special family members have their flowers and help guests navigate the venue by directing them to parking areas, bathrooms, and the bar.
• Participate in the ceremony: Bridesmaids should be in place at the ceremony venue on time and follow the cues to walk down the aisle. They should also stand with the bride at the altar.
• Be photo-ready: Bridesmaids should stick together after the ceremony for group photos so that the couple can enjoy cocktail hour.
• Be model guests: Bridesmaids should mingle with other guests, enjoy the food and drinks, sit at their assigned table, participate in guest-related activities, and dance.
• Maintain a stress-free send-off: Bridesmaids should help the maid of honour, coordinator, or the couple's parents to assemble any items that need to be transported out of the venue at the end of the night, such as decor, the bride's bouquet, and wedding cards and gifts. They should also ensure all guests can get to their cars or shuttle buses safely and hand out pre-addressed tip envelopes to vendors.

Frequently asked questions